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Original poster

HELP - I am being accused of a scam??!

266 replies

BassMama · 24/03/2007 21:29

I recently sold an item on ebay and the buyer sent the money, and I posted the item.

Now, I did post 3 days late but I was on tour and didnt get the email with his address til I got back. I apologised to him, and explained that I was away. He seemed okay with it.

I have had about 15 emails from the buyer, claiming that he never recieved the item.
I have douvle checked the address with him. It was the right one. He has now opened a dispute on paypal and ebay about me and i dont know what to do. he is asking for POD number (?) and delivery number (again, ??)It was just a normal 'post in a jiffy bag' thing, so i didnt get anything like that?

I dont know what to do, and am worried as i have spent the money (it was nearly £200)

OP posts:
Original poster
BassMama · 27/03/2007 00:52

Thanks katelyle,

I would totally complain if it happened to me, but someone suggested that he may be lying and now i dont know what to think. I have asked him to check with neighbours etc, but he says his house is in a building with 24hour security and everything that comes in is signed for by the security (which i think sounds very weird anyway )

I dont know if he is conning me, but how can i prove anything?

I'm going to just have to pay him back arent i?
Ill try to offer half and see what he says.

God this is awful.

OP posts:
Sossy · 27/03/2007 00:56

I wouldn't do that straight away, see what Royal Mail customer services say first. If he is telling the truth, which is of course possible, it's very unlikely he'd accept half. I know I wouldn't if it was me. I know it's easy to say now but you must always get Proof Of Delivery for your own sake, regardless of what postal service the buyer requires or whether or not he's opted for insurance. It really is your own responsibility. Let us know what happens!

lovelylivvy · 27/03/2007 10:23

this is terrible it happened to me recently, but thankfully it was only £15. I posted some baby clothes to someone i sold i just used standard 2nd class delivery and they said they didnt recieve them so i had no choice but to refund them, even though i think they probably had the clothes i have no way of proving it.

On the other hand if i had bought something and it hadnt turned up I would certinally be wanting my monsy back.

The only way i do business now is with recorded delivery to cover my own back.

Sorry this is happening but to be honest i think paypal will just take the money when it is in your account.

Original poster
BassMama · 27/03/2007 16:51

I offered him a partial refund, and he sent me back a very rude message about being too stupid to use recorded delivery and he would not pay for my mastakes, FULL refund right now.

I ahve since replied and asked him to choose - either take half now, or wait a month til paypal decide who wins.

I know i could still lose but at least i will lose fairly. And i might not..

I just dont understand why he has to be so bloody rude. I can understand he is annoyed IF he didnt receive the phone, But i rang the post office and they cannot trace it, which the woman said means it probably was delivered, or possibly 'lost' in the post.

Am i doing the right thing?

OP posts:
zippitippitoes · 27/03/2007 17:02

well if I was the purchaser I would expect a refund and i think as you have discovered that it would be madness to send a valuable itme ininsured as it will always be the sender who has to pay if it is not received

proof of posting certificate only covers you for a very small sum if you claim and doesn't include the postage costs

there is no way of proving someone recieved something if they say they didn't unless you get a signature

imaginaryfriend · 27/03/2007 17:03

BM, what's his feedback record like?

imaginaryfriend · 27/03/2007 17:06

I was asking because I was on the other side, i.e. conned by a seller. It was only for a DVD but it was a Christmas present and cost nearly 20 quid. Basically it just didn't arrive. I naturally assumed that it had probably got lost in the post but then I checked out the buyer's ebay account and he'd sold the same DVD to two other ebayers who also hadn't received it and had both opened claims against him. I did the same. he never once responded to any of the emails about this and eventually paypal refunded me.

I'm not sure I'd be offering him half price back because if he's genuine he will be infuriated by that and if he's not he'll know he doesn't have to accept it, plus it also makes him look very guilty if he does.

If I were you I'd stick by your guns, don't offer to refund him at all, let paypal sort it out. The guy who had to refund me was a clear-cut case because he'd had other complaints. I don't think they force a refund if the seller is genuinely trying to communicate with the buyer.

piglit · 27/03/2007 17:09

If he's not conning you then surely you have to give him back his money? The risk doesn't pass from you when you stick the parcel in the post - it just doesn't work that way.

Can you do any checks to see if he is conning you? Will he know that this is your first sale?

Total nightmare for you. Hope it works out ok.

Original poster
BassMama · 27/03/2007 17:09

the thing is, his feedback is good. member for 2 years, 100% positive. Some neutral ones but nothing serious.

So he seems reasonable enough? But then so am I!! I cant just give in and pay him £200 because he says so.. where does that leave me? Down the item AND £200..

OP posts:
imaginaryfriend · 27/03/2007 17:12

If he's a good buyer then that will definitely work against you. I've generally found that people who do 'scams' have very few sales / buys under their belt. The guy who conned me only had 6 sales, 3 of which had opened complaints against him.

I suspect your buyer might be genuine. Although his abusive emails aren't that great-sounding!

piglit · 27/03/2007 17:12

But he can't prove he didn't receive it - that's an impossibility!

If you order something on line from tesco and it doesn't turn up then you wouldn't expect to pay for it and the same principle must apply here.

He doesn't sound like a con merchant with 2 years history and ok feedback tbh. Sorry.

Original poster
BassMama · 27/03/2007 17:16

I agree, he seems to be pretty genuine - but seriously these emails he sent were very rude and abusive.

On principal i dont want to pay him back?

OP posts:
OrlandoTheMarmaladeCat · 27/03/2007 17:19

I think you just have to accept that you were at fault It's not right that the guy sends rude emails but that doesn't change the facts. Sorry.

LazyLine · 27/03/2007 17:22

Even with a standard certificate of posting you would be nowhere as that only compensates up to a certain amount if you have sent standard mail (about £30 for first class).

For valuable goods you have to send insured.

misdee · 27/03/2007 17:22

basmmama and i am down TWO items and over £100 due to my own fault of not sending recorded. not my buyers fault, MINE. just refund him.

piglit · 27/03/2007 17:30

"On principal i dont want to pay him back? "

Well, that's one way to get yourself thrown off ebay for good.

zippitippitoes · 27/03/2007 17:32

well sorry to say this people are always upset if they lose a lot of money and so I can understnad him being rude especially if he thinks you are going to refuse to pay him back his money because you didn't insure the goods

piglit · 27/03/2007 17:33

I agree with zippi.

zippitippitoes · 27/03/2007 17:39

if you have only sold 5 things then he may well now think you are a scammer as that is a classic thing to do..sell a few items and get a few positive feedbacks before selling a high priced item as a scam

Original poster
BassMama · 27/03/2007 18:04

I know - and i dont want anyone to think i am scamming anyone.. this is really upsetting me.

I meant about paying him on principal, that these emails he sent were extremely rude, totally over the top. And that I shouldn't have to put up with that, you know?

Of course it looks like he is genuine. But my feedback is all really good too.

I understand that people do this in order to con others, even though thats not what i am doing.. This is so awful.

I will never use ebay again!

Although this week I bought 2 other things and they both arrived perfectly, i was happy with both. Why does it have to be when i sell something that it all goes wrong

oh well. I guess I just learnt a very bloody expensive lesson about postage!

OP posts:
LazyLine · 27/03/2007 19:20

Just prepare yourself, as Paypal will almost definitely side with his as a buyer.

LazyLine · 27/03/2007 19:20

Him, not his.

imaginaryfriend · 27/03/2007 21:17

I think your offering to pay him half back was a really bad move tbh, it makes it seem like you are a scammer. Even though I know you're not. from his point of view it would seem like that though.

busy2busy · 27/03/2007 23:39

Hi

The first thing you should do is contact Royal Mail Customer Services. Don't be put off if they don't respond at first.

Technically speaking Royal Mail cannot track the item if it wasn't sent on a tracked service (that is has a barcode on which can be recorded) but they can and do make enquiries at the delivery end. It is definitely worth exploring this route.

Things do go missing in the post, or they are an attempted delivery and the postman has forgotten to leave a card - or it has been left with a neighbour in error, or the packaging has become damaged. For something worth £200 the local sorting office with alway try to check with the delivery guy. (They can't always remember though).

Always get a proof of despatch note - it is free. Also the contract (and therefore any compensation due) is always with the sender - not the recipient. It is always worth sending recorded for anything of value.

Hope this helps - used to work in this area. Don't rule out it might turn up.

mumsypoops · 27/03/2007 23:49

"(a £2000 amp for my band that we all had to pay £400 towards)" - I think you're the one being conned dearie - 2 grand for one amp ? are you serious ? Even when my band were signed we didnt have that kind of gear ! The Stones have that sort of stuff, but they get it for free !

Do you mean a PA system ? Even then you've payed WAY over the score.

Sounds like you've been ripped off hen, and its not by the boy on ebay

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