Teen Eating Disorders Thread 4

[SoTiredNeedHoliday]

Starting a new thread, no 3 is full

@SoTiredNeedHoliday so no experience to share from me. Glad your DD is back in school.

DD has gained 1.5kg at her weigh in at clinic today. I’m feeling relieved but DD is very sad and down and hasn’t wanted to eat dinner tonight. I won’t push the plan today and start a fresh tomorrow.. She finds gaining weight so upsetting.

That should have read - sorry no experience.. I’m v tired today 😴

@Bettybarkalot123 brilliant news! What period was that gain over? We ask for DD to be blind weighed so haven't had to deal with that issue yet. Hope she's ok.

@EdwardTheBlueEngine - a week. She was 43.2 last week, 44.6 this week. Not sure of her new wfh though, I’ll ask at the follow up appointment.
She slept at a friends on Saturday night but I made her eat tea at home and she came home for breakfast at 10 the next day so she only really missed the evening snack. Definitely not ideal but I do think she needs to see her friends, especially as she’s not in school. We had lunch out and she ordered a sweet potato tagine with couscous and two scoops of ice cream for pudding. She seemed to enjoy it so I’ll be adding this to her meal plan.
She’s very withdrawn and sad tonight and says she feels horrid and ugly.

I think we will start blind weighing as it does cause a lot of stress for her. She said she already knew she’d gained as she could see the fat on her body. 😞

That's a really great gain over a week - I'm pleased for you and your DD.

I allow sleepovers occasionally too with limited meals there. Pretty sure pudding and snacks don't get eaten, but the benefits of being with friends outweigh the risks for us.

Bit of a difficult day for us. Supervised lunch at school seemed to go wrong and wasn't eaten. Need to talk to the school. DD very resistant at dinner, which is unusual of late. But I guess there will still be very difficult days, they just feel so much harder after the good days!

Thanks @girlfriendlikespuppies I have found it and applied to join.

Unfortunately DD has lost more weight, 300g since Saturday which makes it 3.5 kg in 2 months and I am despairing. She now weighs 41kg,and is 163.5cm, @lougle I'm assuming this makes her under 80%?

We can't go on with the private therapist, who we love but it seems there's been no impact.

Tomorrow we go to the Schoen clinic. I despair. There is no getting through to her, she just will not eat enough. Last night she refused her evening snack - tipped the kinder bar into her hot chocolate and then refused to drink it. I tried to get her to drink and some spilled on her which led to hysteria.

yesterday she held a mouthful of strawberry milk in her mouth without swallowing for 20 minutes, then she spat it out.

She now needs help beyond what we can do. I admit defeat.

@DarkBlueEyes honestly I would take her to A&E.

@DarkBlueEyes I’m not sure how old your DD is but have in my head that she’s 14? I’ve just worked out her WFH the manual way using 14.5 as her age and it comes out at 78%.

I know you said in a previous post that you were desperate for her to keep going to school but the reality is that she’s too ill to go. She cannot afford the energy she would expend there and she will lose more weight very very quickly. Unfortunately I think you need to pull her out now. Could this be your DD’s incentive to eat and get better?

@rollergirl11 yes she's 14, only just (end July). The issue we have is if she stays home she won't get out of bed and wont' eat at all. The only way she will eat is if she has a reason to. So we are damned if we do, and damned if we don't.

We have to take her out of school I know, today will be her last day. We have the Schoen clinic tomorrow for an assessment and I'm going to beg for medication. Then we have an obs at CAMHs on Thursday and I'm going to basically lose it at them, they can't just let her fail.

I can't really take her to A and E as she IS eating three meals and three snacks, but only about 50% of what she's given, with all the smearing and throwing. Then she refuses - won't swallow or just sits like a zombie with her mouth shut. I am pretty confident if we take her there they'll take her obs and say that her BP is fine (I'm taking it regularly and it is) and her pulse is fine (it is) and send us home telling us to feed her.

We have no choice I know. She says she "knows" all this stuff and is trying but seemingly can't help herself. No amount of encouragement and love and care seems to help either.

This just sucks.

@DarkBlueEyes I’m so sorry you and your DD are struggling, this illness is brutal. It sounds as though your daughter needs urgent medical help, I would also take her to a and e or an urgent gp appointment.

When my daughter was 78% we were told that she was just a fraction away from complete bed rest, getting up only to use the loo.
Is your DD in school? If she is I would stop sending her in straight away. For my DD who didn’t return to school with her friends last week, getting back to school has been a big motivator to get her to eat. Maybe it would be the same for your DD.
Think of you!

Sorry just read you update.

New to this post. Would some kindly workout DD15 WFH. 46.1kg 170cm June 06 birthday. Waiting for call back from doctors for support. Many thanks

How many calories do you think she's taking on in a day @DarkBlueEyes My experience of A&E was that they were very cautious with DD presenting with an ED. Observations and assessments were thorough and if they felt they wanted to admit they would err on that side rather than sending home.

@SoTiredNeedHoliday can't offer any experience on bulimia in school I'm afraid, but we have a similar situation that I posted upthread - another girl is in early recovery. I am worried that if it all goes wrong they'll be in competition with each other but at the moment I think they see each other as support... watching and waiting I guess.

Thanks @myrtleWilson, my DD is seeing it as support at the moment and more encouragement to get better and keep following the plan, but as you say it could turn at any point.

@DarkBlueEyes my DD was admitted even though she was eating a little each day, she was about 76%wfh and the reason for admitting was because she outright said she's fat and she doesn't want to eat and they could see that I had tried every path and avenue available to try and get DD to eat. I was very open about how mealtimes were, how challenging it was and that we were going backward.

The hospital stint (7 days) was our turning point, DD didn't want to be there and eating is the only way to stay out of the hospital. When I took her to A&E I was completely prepared for them to send us home, but I knew at a minimum they would give DD a good talking to and hopefully that would have an impact. It is an emergency if every meal is a battle and DD is losing weight continuously.

Thanks @sotiredneedaholiday that is helpful. I have options for A and E - can't remember where you are, but if anyone could suggest which to go to - I could go to Epsom, Kingston upon Thames, St Peters. Any views on this?

@DarkBlueEyes but they will also take her bloods and do an ECG. DD’s heart rate was very low when I took her and that is one of the main reasons why they admitted her. She wasn’t as low WFH as your DD. You could also really push the fact that your DD is really struggling with the mental aspect of it and stress how you need urgent help. If she were to be admitted they would start the refeeding process there and it is very very strict. As in if the food isn’t eaten within a certain amount of time then a replacement drink is offered and if that isn’t drunk within a certain time they threaten the NG tube. It is really frightening but it could be what kickstarts your DD eating again.

Personally I don’t think you have anything to lose and it’s the remaining thing that you haven’t tried yet? 🤷‍♀️

Also with regards to CAMH’s I would deffo lose my shit with them. Tell them they have a duty of care, threaten to complain to PALS. Do whatever it takes. I think the only reason why they are still seeing my DD and haven’t discharged her yet is because I made it clear I was going to be a nuisance to them. Scream and shout if need be! Don’t make it easy for them!

I took DD to St Peters and they admitted her immediately to the Children’s ward for refeeding.

@rollergirl thank you. That's what we will do on Thursday. I have now phoned CAMHS and asked for a clinician to call me back. Let's see what they say.

@SoTiredNeedHoliday sorry I keep meaning to reply to you about your DD and the new girl at school. I don’t know much about Bulimia either but DD has a friend in her friendship group who has just been diagnosed over the summer holidays with Bulimia. I think School have been informed but she isn’t being supervised at lunch and DD tells me she is eating nothing. This is hugely triggering for DD and really frustrating as this is only DD’s 3rd day back at school not being supervised by me for lunch. DD is being very sensible though and saying that she can’t support this friend regarding her ED as it’s just too close to home for her. I would keep a close eye on this girl. I would perhaps flag it with school so they are aware? DD’s HOY knows that there are a few in DD’s friendship group with issues and she has told me she is on the case and keeping vigilant.

@DarkBlueEyes personally i'd take her prior to going to the private psychiatrist. IF you can get in patient help on the NHS it is going to be a whole lot less strain unless you're using insurance, and even then to take in the therapy they need to have a bit of weight on.

@Rollergirl11 thank you, you are so lucky that your DD has taken the really sensible approach that she can't support the friend with the ED. Our DD seems to be on a mission to save the world, at the moment she'll help anyone who asks, I think it is the ED trying to break her.

My eyes are glued for any signs of cracks.
It must be so hard for a school to try and manage bulemia, AN is tough enough but for bulimia how can they monitor anything. The poor patients, my heart goes out to all the ED victims.

I've heard back from camhs and they are monitoring her apparently. I've just read the assessment report and it's full of inaccuracies and says we were told stuff we weren't. I don't know if I can be bothered to correct it all.

What a shit show.

@DarkBlueEyes she's 78.4% WFH now.
@tupperwaretowers welcome to the thread. Your DD is 79.68% WFH now.

@DarkBlueEyes your DD's eating still puts her in the amber category for that alone "severe restriction (

@Lougle thank you. DD has actually weighed in today slightly higher at 47.27 so I guess that puts her in the early 80’s. Telephone call with doctor has resulted in an urgent referral with CAMHS. She was actually signed off by them in Jan this year. Original referral was due to fainting episodes which unearthed her purposeful under eating. Was doing ok until about a month ago where her eating habits changed and she lost about 10 pounds in a month. Said she is aiming for 100-500kals per day. Said its fun and she likes it. The physical change in a month is astonishing, her leggings are hanging off her. It’s a dreadful situation.