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Join the Mumsnet Donor Conception forum to discuss sperm and egg donation with people in the same situation. Whether you're looking for a clinic, searching for donors, or have experience with sperm donor natural conception, you'll find this talkboard a supportive space to share insights and find advice.

Donor conception

At Home Insemination - Buddies? The story continues....

129 replies

Waiting2BAMummy · 21/12/2020 17:22

So, since there are only 3 posts remaining on the old thread I have made us a new home.

AF arrived for me today and although not what I wanted for Christmas this year made a perfect 28 day cycle so I'll take it! Here's to a January BFP.

Make yourselves comfortable ladies:
@H8624
@ChunkyButFunky87
@Busybee143
@Coolhand2
@Overlyanxious
@restingwitchface86
@bitheby
@juneybean
@Nej1983
@Supermathsdoc

Apologies if I've missed anyone

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bitheby · 10/01/2021 16:19

My plan was to go to a fertility clinic as it's my birthday in two weeks and that feels like a cut off. That's why I wanted one last chance before investing a lot of money in it.

The thought of starting again to find a new private donor does not fill me with enthusiasm.

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juneybean · 10/01/2021 16:23

No I get that, this is our 3rd donor in 4 years :( it's hard to build up that trust. Have you found a good clinic?

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Coolhand2 · 12/01/2021 03:42

Happy new year ladies! I am 8 weeks now and have been feeling so exhausted and sleeping a lot. Working from home has been a life saver because I can nap. I only managed to see my Dr last week since they were closed for the holidays, I was surprised they even got me in early and had a scan booked for this Wednesday, normally things take longer, so it was a good surprise, 🤞 that it's a sticky bean, also first blood work is Wed. I pray everyone gets their bfp this year🙏

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restingwitchface86 · 12/01/2021 10:15

@bitheby Did you end up getting a donation in the end? It's a nightmare trying to do it around lockdown isn't it :(

@Waiting2BAMummy how's your TWW going?

@Coolhand2 so happy to hear a success story, good luck with everything and let us know how the scan goes tomorrow!

My donor let me down at the last minute this cycle. I was so upset and annoyed, I had emailed him Thursday to let him know I was expecting my surge soon, all fine, then on Sunday when it arrived he told me he was "going away" until this afternoon. Firstly I have no idea where he's going during lockdown, secondly why on earth didn't he tell me that?! Surely they can understand how emotionally difficult it is to gear up, do all the testing (and those tests aren't exactly cheap!) and get yourself excited, and then to be let down at the last minute is horrible. Luckily I was able to have a donation yesterday evening from a different donor I'd been speaking to previously but I think it was too late as I ovulated yesterday, I'm hoping the egg is a long lasting one!

Just sad how often you read about donors letting you down, I get that they don't care as much as we do but you'd think they'd have some understanding of how important it is when they agree to help.

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Overlyanxious · 12/01/2021 12:22

@Coolhand2 I’m glad to hear all is going well.

@Waiting2BAMummy I think you’re still in with a chance this cycle. I had my gynae appointment - he said the issue I have is mild so I should still be fine getting pregnant. I feel relieved but also part of me worries that there is still a problem. I think I just need to keep going for a bit and see what happens. I’m going to try to stay off mumsnet for a bit. I think I need to not focus on ttc so much. I will check in though to see how you’re all doing. Fingers crossed for bfps for everyone Smile

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Waiting2BAMummy · 12/01/2021 21:15

Glad everything is going well @Coolhand2 good luck for your scan tomorrow hopefully you’ll feel a little more relaxed after that. There would be no napping WFH for me our bosses hate us being at home as they don’t trust us to be working. We have to have a teams call at 9, 1 and 5 every day and then we get calls during the day in between times. Then they wonder why we don’t get anything done?! 🤔

@restingwitchface86 my normal donor let me down this month too. Arranged with him on Wednesday that I was meeting him on Friday and Sunday then I messaged him on the Friday to ask if he was still okay to meet. He replied about 6pm saying he wasn’t well so couldn’t do this month. I had been on co parents scrambling trying to find someone else in the afternoon as it was obvious he was going to let me down and when I was checking my messages (it puts them in a list and shows you when the person was last online) he’d been online earlier that day. So he had time to find a new recipient but not to reply to my text?? I think it’s because he keeps trying to push me to do NI or PI (whatever that is, I haven’t asked as I don’t want him to think I’m interested!) and because I won’t he’s gone off to find someone who will. Fortunately there is someone else I’d met once before who I managed to meet on the Sunday and then ovulated on Tuesday. Donors are a nightmare I mean don’t get me wrong they’re going out of their way to do something they get nothing out of but they must realise how desperate we are to have a baby that we would go to these lengths, why would they then just act like it’s nothing? I had my usual temp drop at 5 dpo which I believe is an estrogen surge (happened last month too at 5dpo) but today I’m 7dpo and had another so think I’m out.

@Overlyanxious thank you, I’m so glad your doctor said you should still be able to conceive. I understand why you’re still skeptical but he’s the expert you’ve got to try and keep the faith. Good luck.

Here’s to our donor baby boom of 2021. We can do this ladies @Busybee143 @ChunkyButFunky87 and @Coolhand2 are testament to that!

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ChunkyButFunky87 · 12/01/2021 21:54

Ah thank you @Waiting2BAMummy

Well I'm 14+3 today, and today baby decided they didn't like cheese! Threw up my lunch . . First chocolate, now cheese, this can't be my child!! Lol

Counting down to 20 weeks scan/finding out the sex, time is going slowly.

I hope you're all keeping well, sending lots of positive vibes xx

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Waiting2BAMummy · 14/01/2021 13:37

Hi Ladies,

How is everyone doing?

I have a zoom call with a new donor at 5pm. I’m really nervous, you would think I’d be used to this by now. The donor I met this month will only do once a month and it feels a little cringeworthy meeting him at a train station. The toilets are right on the platform and with stations being so quiet now the staff are paying more attention to what the people that are around are doing and it was just awkward. I don’t believe that my other usual donor was really ill and I don’t trust that he will actually turn up this time. Besides having told him in no uncertain terms AI is the only method I’m prepared to do he still asks repeatedly every month if I want to try NI or PI. New donor is only about 10 miles away and he’s only in the area for 3 years for his studies so not like I’m likely to regular bump into him. He’s also only 33 so younger than my other donors so hopefully better quality swimmers.

I feel like I’m going for an interview 🙄🤞

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ChunkyButFunky87 · 14/01/2021 14:46

Fingers crossed then @Waiting2BAMummy

What's PI?! My nativity there I'm sure lol

I hope your Zoom call goes well, it's like speed dating for sperm Grin only the good ones get to the final round! Wishing you lots of luck for a nice, normal donor x

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Waiting2BAMummy · 14/01/2021 14:57

Thank you @ChunkyButFunky87. I have no idea what PI is and I haven’t asked because I don’t want him to think I’m interested! 🙈😂

I’m due a nice normal donor, have had my fair share of idiots and creeps!

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ChunkyButFunky87 · 14/01/2021 15:15

Well I just googled for the both of us @Waiting2BAMummy - Partial insemination! Basically he gets himself close and deposits his offering inside you just before he cums so there's less physically contact! But still ConfusedConfused

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Waiting2BAMummy · 14/01/2021 15:21

Yeah that’s still far too much physical contact for my liking @ChunkyButFunky87 and I don’t really see the point. If you’re prepared to do that you may as well just do NI. Is that just me?

Thanks for enlightening me though! x

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ChunkyButFunky87 · 14/01/2021 15:38

@Waiting2BAMummy no I 100% agree, and it just sounds pervy to me, if your a donor you donate, sperm, not yourself! Lol

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Waiting2BAMummy · 14/01/2021 15:53

Exactly that @ChunkyButFunky87 you’ve probably never been on one these sites, because obviously you don’t need a donor, but there are so many guys that say they will only donate via NI. To me, they’re not donating for altruistic reasons if they need to dictate the method of delivery. Some claim that they want the child to be conceived‘ the way nature intended’ REALLY?! If you’re not intending to have anything to do with the child then what is it to you how they’re conceived?

These guys are clearly just after sex and these women are so desperate they’re easy to prey on!

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Waiting2BAMummy · 14/01/2021 17:26

He’s a normal human!! 🎉🎉

Meeting him on 31st Jan and 1st Feb he’s a really nice guy so happy!

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ChunkyButFunky87 · 15/01/2021 10:01

Wahooo pleased for you @Waiting2BAMummy !

Let's hope he's got some good swimmers! Grin

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juneybean · 15/01/2021 20:18

Yayy great news about your new donor!

I'm 2-3 dpo not really sure but I think my timings were okay!

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Busybee143 · 15/01/2021 21:24

@Waiting2BAMummy so glad you've found someone new, there has got to be a lovely donor out there for you!! @ChunkyButFunky87 I feel like my pregnancy is going so fast now I want it to slow down! Sorry to hear about the sickness, I've been lucky so far in that department.
Hope all you ladies are looking after yourselves x

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Waiting2BAMummy · 15/01/2021 21:57

Thank you @juneybean fingers crossed for you

Thank you @Busybee143 he’s a med student and seems a really genuine guy. How many weeks are you now? How are you feeling?

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ChunkyButFunky87 · 16/01/2021 18:36

Remind me when you're due again @Busybee143 ?

Well today we went for a private scan . . And found out it's a boy! Que DD in absolute tears because she doesn't want a brother Grin consoling a 4 year old wasn't fun!

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Waiting2BAMummy · 16/01/2021 19:32

Oh bless her @ChunkyButFunky87 she’ll get used to it. Congrats on your little boy, glad everything is going well.

AF arrived for me today which makes my LP 2 days shorter this month so going to move my soy isoflavones back to days 3-7 but it does mean I may need to contact my new donor to change the days we’re meeting 🤦🏻‍♀️ I think I’ll wait until nearer the time and see what happens

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Busybee143 · 16/01/2021 21:29

@Waiting2BAMummy @ChunkyButFunky87 I'm 25 weeks now, got the midwife on Thursday and a scan mid Feb at 30 weeks.
Hope dd is feeling a little happier now bless her.

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Waiting2BAMummy · 16/01/2021 22:30

That’s gone so quickly @Busybee143 when are planning on starting maternity leave?

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Busybee143 · 17/01/2021 20:50

@Waiting2BAMummy probably as late as possible. At the moment I'm working from home as I'm a teacher and schools are closed but I'll be 28 weeks before the lock down ends so I won't be going back into school now I don't think I'll have to work from home.
It's a bit weird because I never got to tell anyone I was pregnant because I had to isolate during the last week of term before we broke up for Christmas so when the kids go back I need to tell them I won't be coming back with them which I'm a bit sad about if I'm honest, my job is hard but I love it.

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Waiting2BAMummy · 17/01/2021 20:55

Awww bless you @Busybee143 I’m sure they’ll be sad you’re not going back but also really happy for you.

Do you think the schools will actually go back after February half term?

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