How often do you have sex after 45?

[Rainbow122]

Hi,
I was married. He had affair so that was the end of that. Anyway, fast-forward 4 years and I’ve met someone else. He is amazing and at first he said he needed sex more than once a week. We honestly chatted about it but I’ve been seeing him about a year and the sex is not great these days. At the start I felt he really wanted me. Now I flirt and it falls on deaf ears. I’m still wearing nice clothes and making the effort. It’s a bit like he’s got me so doesn’t need to try? He’s lovely. He compliments me but I’m not sure what’s happened? I’m trying to work out if this is just normal.
with my ex I felt as soon as we married and had a child, he was too childish and went for fun elsewhere when I was sleep deprived and probably sex was low on my priority list.
right now I feel I could go on dates easily but I just want to be loved, cuddled in bed and for someone to fancy me! I feel like men just like the chase.
just wanted to know if sex once a week at this age is average?
Thank you xxx

About 4 or 5 times a week but DH would be happier with twice a day and we’re much older than 45!

Some men have a Madonna/Whore thing going on where they only like to have sex with women that they don’t love, and only love the woman they don’t want to have sex with. It’s like they believe that the woman they love is too pure and precious to ‘defile’. Or he may be depressed, or using too much porn? Have you spoken to him about it?

About 3 times a week, together 5 years, I am late 40’s and partner early 40’s. I would like more but we don’t live together and both have children from prev relationships. On holiday it’s every day though.

Around 3 times a week, I'm 45, he's 53. We would do it more if my teenager was out of the house more but GCSEs are keeping him stuck in! 3 times is about my ideal but DH would like closer to 5 which I'd happily oblige.

Hardly ever, maybe twice a month. Both shattered and have teen Ds with autism who stays up very late. We’re just exhausted most of the time. Been married nearly 16 years. It’s very low on our list of priorities….!

A lot more in my 40s than any other decade.

3-4 times a week on average. But changes up or down depending on how well, or busy we are. What doesn’t change is I feel desired and appreciated every day. We are basically always up for it, but other things get in the way sometimes. When we’re away on holiday together it would be 1-2 times most days. we've been together 7 years, I’m 48, he’s 50.

but the question of what is normal doesn’t really matter. What’s more important is what you want and whether you are getting it…

I’m 56, my boyfriend of a year is 53. He’d be happy with twice a day every day we see each other (on the weekend and once or twice during the week). We average probably once a day so 4 times per week.

Its rare we see each other and don’t have sex at least once.

With my husband not at all for at least five years 😢

Separated now with new partner, we’re both 46. Live apart due to our kids. Honestly, we have sex whenever we can. Last week on five days out of seven. This week probably not at all (he didn’t have his kids last week and does this week).

I think you should talk to him about it as I never really knew what I was missing after giving up with my ex, but I am so enjoying this time with DP.

I’m 50 and we would like to about 3-4 times per week but sometimes only manage once as our teens now stay up too late. 🥲

My ex is autistic (diagnosed now, wasn’t when we married) and if was great when I was his special interest. Then suddenly I wasn’t and he would just gaze straight through me. Devastating tbh and still affects me now and makes me worry it could happen with DP.

Everyone saying 4/5 times a week. Have any of you been married 15+ years?

We’ve been married more than 15 years and I’d say we are 3-4 times per week apart from my period week. Always twice a week even in a quieter time… daily on holiday or sunnier days (often joke DH is solar powered!)

Ok with my ex about once a month, less towards the end of our marriage ( I was in my early 50s) With new partner ( 8 months in) normally everyday we see each other ( 2 or 3 times a week) I think not living together and no teenagers at his house keeps the desire really strong.

I am 48 and DH 58 and I have lost my libido. Once a week is plenty and DH doesn't seem to mind.

The same as before age 45…..

Here you go OP
because someone somewhere always asks the right question and does a survey on it 😁

46, married 16 yrs, 1-2 times a week. I've lost my libido somewhat. Dh is disappointed

Everyone saying 4/5 times a week. Have any of you been married 15+ years?

where do people get the time with teenage dc!

MN is very competitive though, everyone has sex daily, walks 20000 steps before breakfast, a resting heart rate of 25, blah, blah, blah

I’m 41, dh is 50. We dd average twice a week.

Can I ask?… Where do you do it and how long for? Dh and I would love to take more time for ourselves and be intimate for longer, more foreplay etc… but we just end up dd in bed at 10:30, quietly and quickly because we have tween/teen in the house. It’s rubbish really, and I put it off doing it because it feels boring and middle aged 🙈, which inevitably means we do it less!

A double edged sword

I'm 42 and the answer is zero. DH has ED that he is unwilling to treat. I'm sick of raising the issue with him and he gets upset but still won't book an appointment to see the Dr. I think I last had sex maybe when I was 35. And it is truly as depressing as it sounds mainly because my libido is through the roof and I have no outlet, just building resentment.

Once every six weeks on average unfortunately...

Maybe suggest an open marriage 😗
that might get him running to the doctors

So frustrated for you because ED is so common and can be easily treated

They’re full of 💩 😂😂