Family Court - HELP!

[FamilyCourt88]

I'm new on here and I've never posted before so I have no idea if I have posted in the right place, so a little help would be appreciated. I'm going through a tough time at the moment, on account of my dreadful ex-partner. We were together for 12 years and separated in 2020, up until August last year our daughter (7) went to his mum and dads house, where he moved into when we split, to spend time with him EOW.

In August 2023 she came home with a really bad hairdryer burn on her back and scratches on her face, from the same weekend at their house! They didn't let me know and I was mortified when I saw her back, she told me she asked for mummy all weekend but they didn't call me - Things didn't seem right as she had asked me several weekends before to ring her whilst she was with them as she missed me, when I did this they didn't answer...

He hasn't seen her since August 2023 and only just applied to court in January 2024 for 50/50... which has broken me, as he was never bothered about this before, not until he had to pay CSA.

Due to DV, police reported, sat on my chest so his dog could bite me... 😞the burn marks etc. - a solicitor has said he won't get that, which has helped calm the nerves a lot, I am still so very nervous for court on the 19th March

A lot more has gone on in between which I am happy to share, however my worry is, that whatever is granted, how do I force her to do something she doesn't want to do?? I have tried and encouraged until I'm blue in the face but nothing works... Since what happened with the burn and scratches she is refusing to go...

Again, I'm sorry if this has been posted in the wrong place - I'm at my witts end.

Are you claiming via CMS

@RandomMessI do claim, they have said they wouldn’t accept his DNA test, they want their own done so it’s a big waste of money as if they go down the DNA test route then it also goes to collect and pay…

I don’t get what he was trying to do!

He took me to court for split custody and a year after he dropped everything he asks for a DNA test? My mind boggles xx

Thanks for the update, how is your DD doing now.

@MindymomoHonestly she is thriving, she doesn’t ask about him or mention court - and he hasn’t asked about her or really been in touch for a year so to now do this and pull this crap… 😔

I’m going to tell her it’s just a test for Flu because I don’t think it’s fair for her to know the truth - please tell me if you think I’m wrong in that? X

I wouldn’t tell her either, in years time she may ask about what went on and you can tell her then.

So pleased for you both. My ex tried the dna test story with just our youngest, thrn at the next hearing had miraculously had the dna test done. In the space of 1.5wks.

If you ever go back to court, if you aren't given the same judge then ask for the last judge's notes. It costs a couple of hundred but would be hugely beneficial. My barrister told me this as at some point my ex will take me back.

Enjoy having your amazing daughter and having a wonderful life together. Great mum fighting for her!

@MindymomoI thought so, it’s not a very nice thing to know at any age, so to have to try and explain it would be awful - to me he’s calling me a tramp and saying he doesn’t want her…

xxx

@BookArt55Thank you so much for that, I didn’t even know that you can do that.

So their notes show what they decided etc do they? Xxx

My barrister said if/when we end up back in court, if the judge was different the notes will give more of what the first judge decided and why. I think it includes their speech part they do sharing their findings and their reasoning behind it. She said for a couple of hundred pounds they are always worth it, especially given that I had a good outcome. Sorry, not sure on the actual details, but ny barrister was pretty good so I do value her opinion.