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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

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Original poster

What does Child Maintenance cover?

190 replies

thisistheSEA · 20/02/2022 10:42

I’m trying to find a list of what Child Maintenance is supposed to cover? Can’t find anything helpful online, just vague statements about food, housing and clothes.

I’d like to ask my ExH for additional money to cover:
school uniform
school dinners
school trips
private tuition (for GCSEs)
music lessons
new laptop
phone (there are two - one for school I currently pay for and he pays for her smartphone)
glasses (we usually top up the voucher amount) pocket money
gifts for friends birthdays
a contribution to holidays to see family (my family all live overseas).

Which of these would be reasonable to ask for - on top of the Child maintenance of £350 a month?

Thanks

OP posts:
millymolls · 20/02/2022 12:19

He pays £350
YOU are expected to contribute the same
That’s where £700 cones from. It’s not difficult
It’s not up to him to pay everything
You can ask for mor but he’s not obliged to pay and on £30k it’s likely he doesn’t have much skate anyway

titchy · 20/02/2022 12:21

What don't you understand about £350 being half of £700?

He's not a particularly high earner - you're doing well to get £350 frankly - it's more than he has to pay.

And there's no prescribed list of what it has to cover. Can you imagine if there was - feckless fathers demanding invoices.

titchy · 20/02/2022 12:22

[quote thisistheSEA]@arethereanyleftatall I asked for spousal maintenance in court and didn’t get it. He refused.[/quote]
Well of course it was at that salary Confused

DenholmElliot · 20/02/2022 12:22

You asked for spousal maintenance in court? From a man earning £30k? When you earn £25k and have a house thats paid for in full?

OK then.

£350 is plenty. And obviously you match that which makes it £700. Thats where the £700 comes from (but you know that really).

arethereanyleftatall · 20/02/2022 12:23

Ah, that a shame @thisistheSEA that mediation didn't work for you.

How often does he have your dd?

It would be reasonable to expect him to pay the school dinners on the days he has her.

Or if he has her 1 in 7 days, that he pays 1/7 of the extra costs. (As his child maintenance total will reflect how many days he doesn't have her).

Evanesco · 20/02/2022 12:24

[quote thisistheSEA]@autienotnaughty I earn 25K and he earns about 30K (he used to earn more before he lost his job due to pandemic). I still don’t quite understand where the £700 calculation is from.[/quote]
The £700 that people have mentioned is because it is assumed that both you and your child's dad will contribute 50% each of the cost of raising your child. So if he contributes £350 then it is expected that you will also contribute £350, hence £700 a month

arethereanyleftatall · 20/02/2022 12:24

@thisistheSEA
Re spousal, yes I was slow typing and saw after I'd typed that there wasn't a huge disparity between your incomes, which there is for mine which is why mine was suggested by the mediators.

titchy · 20/02/2022 12:25

Actually this sounds familiar...

Itsalmostanaccessory · 20/02/2022 12:27

You need to open your eyes OP.

Child maintenance is all he needs to pay. That's it. Legally, all he needs to give you is what the child maintenance service calculates. Nothing extra.

Child maintenance is calculated at what the government say he can afford to contribute as well as housing himself. It isnt meant to cover everything. You're meant to pay your share of the costs too.

Sometimes it is shit because the calculation is so low. But, legally, child maintenance is to cover his share of everything and that is it.

He pays £350. That goes into your household pot, and you then have to pay for everything. Are you really saying that with £350 from him, plus your own money, that you cant afford music lessons for your kid? And you have no mortgage as you bought a house outright.

What are you spending your money on?

Some people have great exes who agree to split the cost of everything their kid needs 50/50 plus child maintenance but that's rare.

All you are entitled to is £350 a month. You cannot keeping asking him for money and expecting him to say yes. He has to house and support himself too. And he is going to start saying no. You need to budget within your means.

I get £230 a month for 2 kids. So maybe stop moaning.

RetireReady · 20/02/2022 12:27

Some weird answers on here imo if a child wants to do music lessons then both parents should be supportive of this regardless of whose day it falls on and both contribute equally if it's something that the child enjoys.
Having said that I have an ex who has only recently started supporting the children doing anything on his time and contributing anything over minimum CM, the cynic in me thinks he hasn't had an epiphany but is expecting a amendment to the court order coming...will definitely suspect that if he attends any parents evenings Grin

Viviennemary · 20/02/2022 12:28

Isn't the maintenance meant to be the contribution. Anything extra is voluntary. You can ask but can't make him pay AFAIK. If somebody gave me a list like this I would just pay the legal requirement.

TheDoveFromAboveCooCoo · 20/02/2022 12:30

@DenholmElliot

You asked for spousal maintenance in court? From a man earning £30k? When you earn £25k and have a house thats paid for in full?

OK then.

£350 is plenty. And obviously you match that which makes it £700. Thats where the £700 comes from (but you know that really).

Fully agree. OP is living in cloud cuckoo land.
Starlightstarbright1 · 20/02/2022 12:30

Op... cms is the legal minimum he has to pay..

I earn just under 15k a year and get £7 a week.. it covers basically nothing..

You sound very hurt and angry in your posts.

He is paying everything he is legally obliged to.. you need to cut your cloth based on the fact of where you are now..

You might get more been reasonable rather than demanding but at the end of the day he can refuse to pay abother penny top of cms

NorthSouthcatlady · 20/02/2022 12:31

It was kind of obvious you weren’t going to get spousal support. There isn’t much disparity between your salaries after all. You will need to cut the cloth to suit the purse, 2 mobiles and music lessons are luxuries

RetireReady · 20/02/2022 12:32

Also no way someone earning 30k has to pay £350 a month as a CM minimum you might get a rude awakening as he can ask for a recalculation after a year

WouldIwasShookspeared · 20/02/2022 12:33

Ideally, half of what a child needs.
A roof over their head.
A bed and bedroom furniture
Food.
Water.
Warmth.
Clothes.
School related expenses.
Pocket money.
Trips and treats.
Etc etc

Svara · 20/02/2022 12:33

Sometimes it is shit because the calculation is so low. But, legally, child maintenance is to cover his share of everything and that is it.
His share of everything when the child is with the other parent. The calculation is affected by the amount of time the child is with him. He needs to cover costs when the child is with him, including a proportion of shared costs such as school shoes or a winter coat that the child only needs one of.

TicTacHoh · 20/02/2022 12:34

a contribution to holidays to see family (my family all live overseas

This is amazing.

Original poster
thisistheSEA · 20/02/2022 12:36

@RetireReady Can a court order be amended if it was the ‘clean break’ he insisted on in court though? I might look into it though.

OP posts:
Itsalmostanaccessory · 20/02/2022 12:36

@Svara

Sorry, I thought that was kind of obvious but then again... maybe the OP wouldnt actually think about that.

Chilledchablis1 · 20/02/2022 12:37

titchy

“Actually this sounds familiar...”

I agree . It’s the talk about Spousal Maintenance that has reminded me of other threads where the OP tried to say her ex only needed x amount so she should get more !

Imdonna · 20/02/2022 12:37

Its really not that difficult. His contribution is £350 pm. Hour contribution is £350 pm. Add those together its £700 pm.

Hobbies etc are difficult. Because I have known parents insist their child does all sorts and the kids don't really want to. One parent making a unilateral decision and then expects the other to cough up whenever they say so, rarely ends well.

Since you bought a property out right, from the proceeds of the marriage I can't really fathom why it's costing more than £700 per month to keep her tbh.

titchy · 20/02/2022 12:37

[quote thisistheSEA]@RetireReady Can a court order be amended if it was the ‘clean break’ he insisted on in court though? I might look into it though.[/quote]
After a year yes. He can then just pay the cms minimum. Which is less than he's paying now.

MichelleScarn · 20/02/2022 12:37

@titchy

Actually this sounds familiar...
It does doesn't it, especially with the expectation re SM on the exDH salary!
TicTacHoh · 20/02/2022 12:37

@RetireReady

Also no way someone earning 30k has to pay £350 a month as a CM minimum you might get a rude awakening as he can ask for a recalculation after a year
Corrrect, could be around £260 a month, if he has the child EOW
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