Le Tour de France 2016! - MN Peloton takes to the road again!

[thewheelscomeoff123]

Yes it's July almost, which means only one thing. The biggest, craziest, Frenchiest push bike race in the world. Three weeks of riding round France in multi-coloured lycra, sweating, swearing, playing poker on 380 wheels, tears of joy and frustration, in the saddle for about 5 hours per day, up and down massive hills, throwing the odd tantrum. Then going to bed, and getting up in the morning and doing it all again! Questions: Why? Well we just don't know. When? Starts on Saturday 2nd July with a flat bit from the beautiful Mont Saint- Michel on the Normandy coast to Utah Beach, and ends with the sprint finish on the Champs Elysee, Paris on Sunday 24th July. Where do they go? Essentially they ride for 2,200 miles around the edge of France, and wandering a bit into Spain, Andorre, and Switzerland. This is for the sake of going up and down the Pyrenees and the Alps. Which we know as the 'lumpy bits'. There's a route map coming up. There's always a route map. Is it tiring? Evidence suggests it might be. In the 3 weeks the riders consume the calorific equivalent of eating 252 McD's double cheeseburgers. Some of us are both proud and ashamed of the fact we could eat all of that in the 3 weeks without riding anywhere..... So who wins? It's the person who covers that distance in the shortest time. BUT..it's a team game and the winner cannot do it without all 9 team mates. The prize is 500,000 Euros, which the winner will partly hand out to his buddies. Is it on UK tv? Yes, ITV and Eurosport carry a lot of live action and both do a highlights package for an hour or so each evening. Is there a 'virtual' competition where you can 'buy' a team of riders within a budget and see how they do? I'm glad you asked that. here is a link to everything you will need to show off your directeur skills and have a bit of added interest for the race Do I have to know loads about pro-cycling to understand what's going on? Nope. Have a watch, have a read, ask anything on this thread and your layered knowledge will build and you will get so much more out of it. When are you going to shut up and show the route map? Now.

Yeah DramaAlpaca that competitive thing creeps up on you doesn't it!

So is there a prize for topping the league at all? Or penance for being such a smart arse?

I didn't think I had a competitive streak, but clearly I do

I had a brief flurry into the top 65% of the table but am sinking back to accustomed obscurity.

I did wear yellow on our MN TdF thread for a while back in 2014. I could have been a contender....

I am doing spectacularly badly. In our family league I am being outstripped handsomely by my MIL and she chose her team on the basis of whatever names sounded interesting .

Spartacus has retired now to prepare for the Olympics as well and get a bloody haircut hopefully. My team are dwindling!

I feel for you pisa, I was being beaten roundly by DS2 in the first week and he doesn't give a damn about cycling, I made myself feel better by imagining he'd actually just learned everything from me without realising. To be fair apart from Froome/Sagan picking a nice name doesn't seem a bad plan this year, it's all gone a bit random.

Still being roundly beaten by DS1 but as he is cycling obsessive to the point where he wants to find a uni where he can do it as a subject it's not so bad.

Oh yes ShutUpLegs, I remember we were handing out various types of jerseys on that thread, for entirely silly reasons. Someone won for a graphic account of the consequences to be suffered by their DP IF pre-programme arrangements hadn't been made. Oh how we laughed. We also had 'magical jerseys' as they changed colour to suit your skin colour, tone, complexion and hair colour. Yellow and green doesn't suit everyone. And the less said about white-with-red-polka-dots the better.

And HowGoodIsThat did a fantastic piece of reporting as the one with the over-sized uniform, stood at bollards with a flag and a whistle. In York I think.

Ooooh Cordelia is taking the wind!

Wheel of Pan, as a team, appear to be comfortable right now. That's going to change.

I have to hope for big things from Ritchie Porte to hang on to the yellow jersey.

The ITV cycling podcast has a phone interview with Cav. I really enjoy listening to them if I can. It helps me miss Ned less.

It is now feasible for Porte to get onto the podium. He just needs to gain a couple of minutes - and for Adam Yates to gain half a minute/Molema to lose time, so that we can have Froome, Yates and Porte on the podium.

Ooh, the yellow jersey has changed hands again!

Chapeau to cordelia - it feels good, doesn't it?

Happy daughter :-D

Great pic, Atia!

Wow for the photo! That's a real take for the thread isn't it? Well done.

I just looked back to the 2014 thread, it's somewhere in Sports, and so funny in hindsight.

Ned - it;s so funny when he makes sort of empathic statements about what the riders are thinking, or feeling at particular points in a stage. The Languid, Handsome One must surely be thinking, "Really? You know what it feels like?"

Oh wow atia! Did he have his bright yellow trousers and watch on though, this is important . I feel like I've met him now via some sort of six degrees of separation thing!

Loved listening to Cav phoning in to the commentary box. Also very much enjoyed Jensie's passionate defence of Froome. Poor man must think 'I attacked on a downhill, RAN up Ventoux and just nailed a TT, what more do people want from me?'.

HowGoodISThat is me! That is who I was back then. And yes, you gave me yellow for my middle-of-the-race reportage.

Happy Days.

I miss Ned in the features - I think it's helpful that he was a sports journalist first and cycling fan second. He has a lightness of touch and a better delivery than Daniel Friebe. I know Daniel has written books on cycling, is very knowledgeable and speaks several languages but his voice... grates.

ShutUpLegs - I thought it was you! You were fearing you'd be put on latrines duties. When you were in fact centre and front, at the pointy end of things.
Happy days indeed. Each time I go past the point where me and matey were stood for 4 hours or so I give it a little wave.

misty-eye'd look back to 2014 via the TdF thread

we even had to have etape deux

Poor Tom DuMoulin.