Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Victims of crime

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. For free advice contact Victim Support.https://www.victimsupport.org.uk/

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

What to take to prison

999 replies

drinkswineoutofamug · 18/01/2017 21:38

Will be brief, daughter due to be sent down. Any one have a clue what to pack? Do we pack a bag? I've looked on line and it's a bit vague . Any help greatly appreciated.

OP posts:
CondensedMilkSarnies · 03/02/2017 08:46

Hi Drinks been thinking of you and DD , glad you're holding it together and I hope DD gets looked after properly.

I've been in a similar position , my DD was sent away (not prison) and she was terrified. It sounds harsh but I was glad she was scared as it showed her the reality of her actions (didn't stop me sobbing though when I saw her little tear stained face with her begging me to take her home ). Xx

drinkswineoutofamug · 04/02/2017 00:08

Mixed emotions tonight. Didn't get my planned phone call. And she's telling me only what she wants me to hear. Which I understand. But I can't speak to her because I would be breaking her trust. It's been a hard day.

OP posts:
Rainatnight · 04/02/2017 05:16
Flowers
LuluLovesFruitcakes · 04/02/2017 08:14

Hugs drinks Flowers

youarenotkiddingme · 04/02/2017 10:01

Flowers sorry about phone call. I hope you manage to speak soon.
Can you visit weekly so keep face to face contact up so you can see for yourself how she is?

drinkswineoutofamug · 06/02/2017 19:21

Got another visit for Wednesday. She's not called me or anything. My anxiety is on the ceiling since I was given some info on what she was saying. I'm waiting for the prison to phone to say she's harmed herself. She has history for it and if she's so down and scared. I've got no one to speak to about it, as my friends have got their own shit going on . And to be honest this has been going on for so long it's starting to bore me, no one want to hear this continuously . I've spoken to my mum and her opinion is the ex set this up . How and why I don't know. But she thinks the ex knew that my girl would be arrested.
I'm running on empty, being pressured from what feels every angle. Full of a muzzy head and snotty cold. Sorry . Wittered.

OP posts:
Theyhaveallbeenused2 · 06/02/2017 20:01

Hi drinks.

I have just read all.of this thread,didn't want to read and run.
Brew

CondensedMilkSarnies · 07/02/2017 07:43

Hi Drinks I'm so sorry you're feeling shitty , a cold is all you need on top of everything else.

I guess maybe your Mum is wanting to pin the blame on anyone but her Granddaughter , which is understandable and the ex does sounds like a right piece of work. Maybe she set it up , maybe she didn't , you'll never know for sure and will only send yourself round the bend trying to figure it out.

Unfortunately this is what it is, awful and shitty for sure but this is what is happening ( im saying this in a kind tone X) and you will deal with it. Allow yourself bad days , don't try and fight it X

Who is telling you what your DD is saying ? Are you sure they're correct ? Is there anyone at the prison you can voice your fears to ?

I hope today is better for you and you have a good visit tomorrow. Xx

Snowflake65 · 07/02/2017 09:44

OP you're fab. I'm so pleased to see positive supportive replies on here Flowers

drinkswineoutofamug · 07/02/2017 11:08

Her support worker saw her on Friday . My girl is telling me what she wants me to hear. It's serious enough for prison ss to get involved Sad

OP posts:
CondensedMilkSarnies · 07/02/2017 11:35

I hope they listen to her and give her the help she needs. What a worry for you xx

drinkswineoutofamug · 07/02/2017 22:19

Spoke to her support worker again this evening. She had spoken to the prison safeguarding team. I will find out tomorrow if things have been dealt with. Other things have come to light which is positive.

OP posts:
Carollocking · 08/02/2017 02:46

Hope your visit goes well today

CondensedMilkSarnies · 08/02/2017 09:24

Thinking of you today , I hope you get some answers.

drinkswineoutofamug · 08/02/2017 09:46

I will up date you later but I want to tell her the good news first. It's only a little bit but good .

OP posts:
Kr1stina · 08/02/2017 09:51

A little bit good is still good.

Hope it goes well

CondensedMilkSarnies · 08/02/2017 09:57

A little bit of good news is 100x better than bad news. Tell your daughter that we're all rooting for her xx

drinkswineoutofamug · 08/02/2017 10:26

Will do x

OP posts:
drinkswineoutofamug · 08/02/2017 16:47

Just got back from visit. She's a lot more positive about things and has been moved into a house. Met people and made friends, with armed robbers 🙄 any way the good news is the cps have dropped the assault charge due to insufficient cctv footage. The solicitor is writing the ex a letter telling her to fuck off and do one. Well they will put it more politely than that! Court has been brought forward to next week instead of march . And she wants to go to schools when she's released to tell kids not to drink, take drugs and about the dangers of controlling relationships . Tell kids about her experiences in prison as it's not good fun it's dam right scary . She's been getting love letters off other inmates so got moved! They wanted to make her time in prison more pleasurable!
But she's good, calmer which makes me a happy mummy

OP posts:
drinkswineoutofamug · 08/02/2017 16:49

Oh she says hi to everyone

OP posts:
Carollocking · 08/02/2017 17:53

Very happy for your news,hope they feel she's had enough of a shock and release her next week and that it really has helped her and not made things worse.
I'm sure she realised how much you've done for her and obviously how much you love her.
Really hope works out well In the end

drinkswineoutofamug · 08/02/2017 22:27

She said she can pay me back in hugs and kisses

OP posts:
Carollocking · 09/02/2017 00:01

Sounds a good method of payment to me

fleuricle · 09/02/2017 09:37

OP, I have been lurking.
I have nothing to add, sorry,
except to say you are an amazing Mum, she is lucky to have you
and there but for the grace of god go all of us.x

CondensedMilkSarnies · 09/02/2017 10:46

That's fantastic Drinks xx so pleased for you and DD xxx