Should I become a stripper?

[sheapards]

Hey Everyone I’m 26, I have a 2 year old son, my parents sadly aren’t involved (my baby’s father is also a lost cause, he has his son twice a month overnight), I’ve been toying with the idea for about a year to become a stripper as I have a family member who also is - ultimately I feel like I’m going to massively regret it if I don’t, I’d like to be smart save as much of the money as I can while’s at uni… mostly I’d like the money to be able to have a nice car & go on holidays (the usual really) I feel like my sons at a good age it can’t come back to haunt him much, my only issue is the limited child care I have a couple of friends that may sacrifice the odd Saturday night.

I do my nearest town. Never bumped into anyone I know there. Pre-pandemic, I had a favourite club and never worked anywhere else-the pandemic shut the club down permanently unfortunately. That wasn't my hometown, but the next one along, I just liked it better than my hometown one. I am 42 now, I moved house and began going to the one in the nearest town and I go back now and again as I miss it. I still make money-albeit a lot to do with the fact that I message my old regulars to tell them I am 'making a guest appearance'.

Used to live next door to a woman who had 2 children and worked (in a club) as a dominatrix. If you didn't know, you would NEVER have guessed. She was otherwise very mundane.

Also know someone (now a regular mum) who used to hang from disco balls (not a euphemism) in a thong. No one even remembers this stage of her life, I don't think.

I think it's your choice what you do. I wouldn't have done it for material things. But I would have done it to put a roof over my head and to save for a secure future for my children if I'd needed to (and if I'd ever had the body for it!).

There's a lot of snobbery about nudity and sex work. Mumsnet isn't the place for a balanced perspective on this.

A big market, you say…?

Hmmmm…🤔

You don't need to know what you're doing on a pole either. In fact, the top earners I've known, in the main didn't do much but reluctantly twiddle about on it. You don't make money from the pole (at least in this country) very often, so it isn't of much use to the hard hustlers. I was an exception as I loved the pole and became quite good at it (I still have one at home!) but in general, not something to worry about. A lot of strippers who are interested in it tend to twiddle about on it while the club's quieter, earlier on etc.

Have you considered alternative sources of additional income?

I took up Matched Betting in November and made £2,000 in that time. And do it very fleetingly (3-4 hours a week) but many people make way more as they dedicate more time to it. The great thing is you can work it round the rest of your life and do it when sitting on the couch watching tv.

If you are keen on stripping, then that's up to you and some PP have offered way better advice and guidance than I could.

I did an AMA on this a couple of years ago and one of the questions was about bodies. In all honesty, the 'top, top earner' I've known (a woman who made a LOT of money in my last regular club), did not have a stereotypically great body. She was quite a large woman in fact. And looked older than her years. She had the gift of the gab and a hard hustle-I love her to bits, still friends now, not saying anything at all bad about her, just illustrating that having a stereotypically fantastic body may be an asset for a stripper and will certainly help, it is absolutely not a necessary to make money.

Apologies, should have read'

'that having a stereotypically fantastic body may well be an asset for a stripper and will certainly help, but it is absolutely not a necessity to make money.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/AMA/4483465-Ex-stripper-webcam-worker-also-been-a-honey-trap

Might answer some of your questions OP.

If it's just stripping and if you have heavy makeup and a stage name, I'd go for it. Try it for amonth and reassess.
Make sure of your own health and safety at all times.
Choose inspiring music.

It's hard work, tough hours, you have to deal with some awful people, and while some nights will be lucrative, others will be dead and you'll still have to tip out. It may not be as lucrative as you're expecting - unless you have know you will be working the best shifts in a high end club.
Stripperweb used to be a good resource, unsure if it still is.

It's a job, and like all jobs the quality of working conditions, expectations of how far you'll go and pay will vary enormously depending on the employer. Make sure you do your homework and do what you need to put yourself at the better end of the spectrum. Remember that the poor quality end of the spectrum carries a real risk to your physical and mental wellbeing.

I don't like sex work of any kind because I believe it reinforces the concept of women as objects for sexual gratification. But that's my opinion. I would never judge another woman for participating in it. In my view the issue is one for society to tackle not the individual women who are usually the least powerful in the whole industry. I also agree that if it's ok to wear next to nothing on a beach (or increasingly at music or acting awards) why on earth should we judge strippers differently.

Just go in with your eyes open and keep yourself safe.

Do only fans you can do it ay home and it's safer.

What I need is some kind of club where I show up naked and people pay me lots of money to put my clothes back on. Is there something like this out there?

What is matched betting? How did you learn about this? Did you do a course? Sounds lucrative!

OP ignore the judgmental old women here. My beautiful SiL was a dancer/stripper in a local club and it earned her good money that she wouldn’t have earned in a normal job. She knows she is naturally very beautiful and used it to her advantage. She has also been an escort accompanying men on dates and days out (NOT sex). She had the full support of her mum, her grandparents and her brother (my DH) and I always thought good for her I wish I had the confidence. I don’t think it is anything to be ashamed of and no different to modelling lingerie or swimwear.

PP here are confusing this for sex work which is absolutely not what this is.

However, OP, the only things to be aware of are some of the girls can end up being introduced to hard drugs by other girls - my SiL was never interested in this. Also, my SiL had to stop the dancing and escort work as boyfriends didn’t like it and I think it is difficult to have any serious relationship whilst doing this kind of work, understandably.

I wouldn’t. At some point someone will walk in who you recognise or after a while you see the punters around town and have to say hi knowing they’ve seen your fanny. Not only seen it but that youve alluringly ground around with it their faces while they’ve cum in their pants.

I would not judge you at all. But as a mother if you do this please be safe. It's a scary clientele sometimes. If you were my dd I'd move heaven and earth so you you wouldn't have to do it.

i have my hall stairs and landing wanting stripping, and really struggling to get a reliable decorator so i reckon you would soon be busy

@RedPandaLove judgmental old women ay, charming. You're suggesting stripping isn't sex work? 🤣

It sounds like you need to choose carefully, you want somewhere safe, no filming, no touching and no contact after hours. See it as a separate part of your life.
I’m old and I wouldn’t judge you at all. Just stay safe, your child needs you. Good luck..

And if in the future someone recognises you, they’ll have no proof, you can laugh and say ooohhh wish I had thought of doing that, does it pay well?

Unless she’s shagging the men, what’s the problem?

I quite enjoyed it back in the day but the hours are long, 6am finishes and it takes a lot if hustle to make ££

I also dont really think it will work re childcare but age wise you're fine

Most girls were not doing extra, i would worry about phones filming nowadays which weren't a thing in 1943 when i danced 🤣🤣

Submit a claim with the CMS and make the father pay his share.

People find out … no matter how far away or anonymous you think you are. If it matters to u that people find out, don’t do it.
I worked in large highly regulated company, in legal. Many employment issues were handled. a number of disclosures were made about employees who previously worked or moonlighting in sex work & stripping, drugs and … kink scenes/work. Employees/clients coming face to face with each other at work or clients.
Not saying anyone got fired …. Just saying, esp these days, that people get outed and usually tell someone or everyone. Some people have very good memories for faces. Don’t think they are not looking at your face. Makeup hides you or that they are too drunk. No chance of anonymity & workplace rumor will stick to u like glue.

What do they say … don’t do anything you don’t want your grandma seeing on Google.

Your body your choice. As long as you aren’t being forced or coerced I don’t see why not. If you hate it you can always leave. I’d do it in a different town to where you live though.