We've massively overstretched ourselves. Would it be ok to borrow from the DC savings? Has anyone ever done this?

[Parsnipsandginger]

We would put it all back over time. The plan is for DC to have their savings (from us) when they are 18. That's 5 years away yet
We urgently need to find £2.5k

Thoughts plse

If it is money you personally set aside to give them later, then yes, I'd take it for emergencies. If this is money given to them by others or saved by them from birthday gifts etc you shouldn't touch it.

There's a world of difference between money they saved and money you set aside hoping to give to them. We are in an economic crisis and nbot everyone has the luxury of ring fencing money during these times.

You'd be better off getting a 2nd mortgage, for say £10k. It'll cover those expenses and give you a cushion fund. I wouldn't touch the child's money - you'll never replenish it and you'll feel awful.

Ive only read your updates but just in case no-one has said this: it's also OK to pause the savings. You should only save if you can afford it, no-one's going to thank you for struggling on just to put another £100 away for your kids. They have needs in the here and now, as do you.

And FGS go to Iolla the next time someone needs glasses!

As long as you pay it back to them over time .My friend did this .Paid all of it back though.If in a tight spot no worries

You're talking about your money- not theirs- right? They don't know it's there.

Why do you feel that your child(ren) have a right to a savings pot?

Are you actually reading the advice which is about saving for your own essentials before your child's 'pot'?

Why are you getting yourselves into a financial mess by putting money into savings for them, above saving for your own essential outgoings?

As PPs have said- the outgoings now of over £2K are predictable to an extent.
Glasses, uniforms, car repairs etc.
This is what you should be saving for- not s nest egg for your child.

Boiler and leaks- do you have Home and Contents insurance? Can you claim, minus the excess?

You need to take a big step back and take the emotion out of your money-choices.

If you had loads of excess cash each month, fair enough, earmark some of it for your kids in the future. But you don't.

To give a comparison, when I left uni in the late 1970s, I had a savings pot of almost £3K. Nothing from my parents who were poor. I'd got a full grant then, not spent it all, and worked during all my holidays. I bought a car as a student (ok it was a rusty old banger.)

Because I had to do it all myself, and not get a penny from my parents, it taught me to save and budget.

Even when my DCs were learning to drive we bought them a car to share, but they paid towards the insurance.

We have been able to give them a very big chunk of money towards their own homes.

You need to manage your own money first and foremost before putting it aside for a child you doesn't even know it's there.

Terrible advice. Getting a bigger debt -paying interest- when the OP can't manage the outgoings she has already.

couldn't agree more @AIBUYesMaybe

Of course you should use it if it was your money originally.

Honestly, some posters on here..you can tell who's never had money worries.

Your kids won't thank you for making their lives more difficult if you stick to some misguided principal.

Water leak is genuinely unforeseen so reasonable.

Suggest replenish within a year, perhaps giving up something to fund it. I would guess you could reduce use of the car, maybe stop drinking for a while, as examples.

If you’ve saved the money of course it’s fine. It sounds like it’s a luxury you can’t afford at the moment, paying for day to day living expenses (including the childrens) must come first. You’d be a fool to take out a loan rather than use it

Yes it is fine. Not worth getting into debt!

I’ve done this - I completely drained my kids savings about 5 years ago. I’m currently now in a position to pay it back and have been doing monthly. The kids will end up with significantly more in their savings once I’m done.

Borrowed it as I was a single parent and we literally didn’t have enough money coming in. Covered bills, food etc. We also went on a holiday with it - much needed and whilst I know this wasn’t essential, at the time we really really needed a break from everyday life.

I know times are different now for 'young people' but my parents would never have found the spare cash to save for me or my siblings. They only started being able to save when I left university.

My parents did this to me and my brother when we were children. No problem at all. I can't remember if the actual savings were ever returned, but they've given us so many gifts of cash over the years it really doesn't matter.

I know quite a few people with complicated or very high prescriptions whose glasses are around £500. I have varifocals with an average prescription and even they aren’t far off this amount though I do get sunglasses with specsavers 2-1 offer. It’s a big expense though.

Aside from the part contributed by their grandparents I wouldn’t even feel obliged to replace it in your shoes as the child doesn’t know about the money and doesn’t need it now. It’s nice to save specifically for university etc but it’s a luxury and there’s no point going through hardship in their childhood to hand them a sum when they are 18.
Use it for a good emergency fund for the family and to enable you to make good financial decisions and you’ll be in a stronger position to help them later.

It's not ideal but I had to do this once, I borrowed money from DD's account as we didn't have enough to cover the rent. She was only 3 & we've never told her. Paid it back within a couple of months by extreme budgeting. Have also got ourselves into a better position too (small amount of savings, enough for new white goods or furniture if something broke unexpectedly). Now we add a bit to both accounts as & when we have it spare but otherwise don't touch it.

You and your family have been very lucky with your eyesight if this surprises you

I forgot to say, if using this money means you don’t have to go into overdraft or take out a loan, I’d do it. Do the DCs schools have uniform sales?

Those saying you need money put aside for unexpected expenses I totally agree. But on a lot of people’s wages, especially now, there is literally nothing left at the end of the month to put aside or things left to cut back on.

Slippery slope. Can you cut back at all from other areas, cutting off subscriptions etc for 12mths and similar?

I wouldn't use it if I didn't think we couldn't replace

In fairness it's still your money to use since most of it's come from you, hasn't been handed over and your DC doesn't know about it
However if you can't afford the "unexpected inflation of general expenses" which happen to us all from time to time it's unlikely you can afford to replace £100 a month, especially when the bills just keep on going up - after all if you could then presumably you could have saved those sums against this kind of thing

So really only you can decide, but when doing so it could be worth bearing in mind the above (and maybe at least leave what the GPs gave in the pot)

My DH has recently spent about £700 on varifocals. They are expensive.

I did it nearly thirty years ago when my middle child was a baby. We had very little money and the washing machine had broken down beyond repair. With a two year old and a young baby in winter, we could not afford it any other way and we were desperate.

Well that depends. If it is OP and partner’s money then it’s fine, savings for kids is a luxury not many can afford. My parents didn’t and neither have I for my kids. But if it’s money other people have given then no it shouldn’t be touched.