Frugaleering, cakes and baby talk

[Taytocrisps]

Just starting off a new thread as the other one was getting full.

Wow em he is is gorgeous 😍 Glad all is well and you are home. Your mum sounds fab 👍

I really need to try and keep up.

Nothing much going on here. Spent about £5 on bits that weren't in the delivery, £56 on Sainsbo's delivery and £2.50 on the Big Issue. Tomorrow we need dog food and are collecting curtains that are too bloody expensive we had made for the lounge. All others will be ready made off the t'internet.

Haha! Yes I've experienced iron tablets before! Fibre stuff is on hand. Don't really fancy black pudding (ick) but a roast beef though.....mmmmmm

cag I can't remember if I mentioned this or not but, Amazon are giving away a free baby box worth about £40 if you set up a baby wishlist and spend over £20. My sister saw the deal the other day.

I was given iron tablets after DS but didn't know they turned your poo black. I was quite concerned for a while!

Have you definitely decided on a name for the baby then Cag ? We knew what we were calling DD since before she was conceived but had no agreement on a middle name until about a week after she was born.

I have a big basket of Boden that I must not check out (kiddie stuff) and a basket of Seasalt for me. I do need the coat though - the only winter coats I have are smart wool ones suitable for work. I don't have anything waterproof, warm and with a hood for trolling around with the kids. I was hoping to find a discount code but no luck.

I must stop the clothes spending. I am being sucked in because I do genuinely need some stuff for me /kids but that turns into an excuse to buy more than we strictly need. Old bad habits creeping in.

Its all a big tempting - i am feeling very flush at the moment because I finally (after more than 2 years) got a big payout of the cash in the company I put into liquidation when I wound my self-employed business up. It really is a lot of money but 1. I still need to pay tax on it - don't know how much but a lot,and 2. It's what I need to live on for the next year and possibly beyond.

I am starting to think that I am really not going to be able to do a full time senior job again. I simply can't see how it will work with DS as I can't think of a single childcare solution that is not too much of a compromise /too risky. I have been giving a lot of thought to how I could set up a business soninvan be flexible with my hours and still make a sensible contribution to our finances. I don't mind working hard if it can be flexible /near to or at home. But I can't just work for pin money either - I need to actually earn sensible dosh. I was the main earner before so my salary is really needed. Or we will have to move house to become mortgage free. Lots of options, all with some compromise and hard to weigh up. But I don't think we can just pick up our old life once this maternity break is over, and that is a bit scary. I don't think DH is ready to acknowledge that yet but I feel we need to plan. It goes round in my mind in the middle of the night

Big decisions there Sea. Mortgage free sounds great.

Em Is she scared of him?. Your mum does sound wonderful.

Christmas that's exactly the predicament I have had for the last 3 years! We moved house to lower our bills / mortgage which helped. And it has taken me 3 years to find a suitable job (still trying). If I was willing to work from 8 until 6pm 7 days a week I could have found a job straight away. But childcare is extortionate & DS would have hated it. I could have earnt £90,000 full time over the last 3 years!

I havent put together the Ikea chairs but I have tackled another cupboard and a big chest of drawers. Have put away summer clothese and got rid of some.

Am being ruthless. I have a huge pile of stuff for the charity shop now.. but theres loads more to do..

I have also made a - rather good I think - soupy stew with stuff that needed using up:- onions, celery, carrots , one of our (many) marrows, some of our tomatoes and lardons; plus garlic, garden herbs, smoked paprika nd caraway ..

Frugal and Le Yum (and loads of it!).. .

Em how is Catface with DS? My cat sadly left home when I brought my DS back

sea I'm really glad you've finally got hold of your money. You've mentioned it in a kind of 'sometime never' kind of way before.

You need to sensibly buy all the bits you really need (which seasalt coat? I so nearly bought one, but the price!), it will take the edge off the burning a hole feeling.
Then find out how much tax and stash it.

You live in London don't you? How easy to relocate, or would you downsize? I simply cannot believe the propety prices, like fluffy I'd go mortgage free (I am), as it's not just the extra money to find each month, it's the peace of mind that whatever happens, no one can simply turf you out. However poor I am, the house is mine, and my dc will always have a roof over their heads (even if it has a few holes).

With your childcare issues with you working (I'm not calling your ds an issue btw), I'd try to set up freelance? Don't know what you do, but you're clearly a clever professional. It's the only way you can choose your hours I think.

More yarn! The stylecraft will be a cabled sleeveless pullover, the yarn cake a blanket for cagletini sssh!

Tea was spag bol, extra yummy as I didn't make it. Any meal I don't cook is automatically tasty.

Aw lonely! 😳😘😍

Gosh seacow that is so tough. Childcare is extortionate anyway but suitable provision for children with SN is tough. I don't suppose they have to abide by EHCP do they? Hopefully some kind of freelance consultancy type thing would be possible.

Decluttering for the win!

Can I just rock up anywhere and book a flu jab? I booked with the GP but it's not for 3 weeks

Cag I'm pretty sure you can get it free at most pharmacies but please be aware that your surgery will already have ordered and paid for you vaccine that said I'm tempted to pop along to Sainsbury's this year as it's so much more convenient. All the clinics are my surgery are in the evening or a Saturday. No thanks I spend all day there at work I don't want to have to go back (my office is based at my drs surgery)

Welcome home em. Your mother sounds ace.

Sea, if you can resist the other stuff the Christmas thread usually has boden and other discount code. I will keep an eye out for seasalt.

Have you seen the Smyth's toys new variation on the 20% off weekend?

Ohhh I didn't realise that! Would it be wasted then or would they use it for someone else?

TBF I am happy to wait anyway I just thought if I could get in there before I catch an autumn cold it'd be good (I heard they don't let you have it if you're ill?)

£5 in asda or free if you qualify. I'm booked next Monday if the pharmacist turns up.

I think we all know they'll cancel me.

46UA 20% off and free delivery on boden

Cag chances are it'll get used but I just like to point it out you can't have it if you have a fever, it's not a live vaccine though so just a cold is fine.

I've got my Christmas shop down to a fine art by writing in my January diary what we are and what got wasted and what to change for the year after.

Chicken livers are high in iron, very cheap frozen.

That is a genius idea Life. How was the tooth?.

I'll order Christmas biscuits next week, only because I want particular gf ones.

I use frozen blueberries on porridge. Other than that frozen fruits go into puddings like others do.

Life that's a great idea to write down Xmas notes in the new year. My hopes of a carefully budgeted Xmas with a spreadsheet are already fading as dh has bought 2 presents without permission discussing it first. I didn't ask how much he spent.

Erk!! Stop talking Christmas already !! (I realise its frugal to think about it early ) but ive only just put my summer clothes away today .. I dont want think of Christmas yet!

Flip just caught up! You chatty lot

Em thats great you are home already, love the name - gorgeous boy!

I booked dds flu spray today, she point blank refused the flu jab. In fact she is already feeling very anxious about the jabs she has to have at school in the next year or so. Not heard anything about our flu jab yet hopefully work will sort it soon.

Snuggly I would just keep the twins presents to small things, little books, bath toys, new socks, a few food treats. Is there things you could get for all them like games or out door toys?

Busy day here, worked all day and then dd had her drama group tonight. Its the only club she is going to do on a week day evening but costs £75 a term am justifying it by thinking about how much I save by my parents paying for other stuff!!

Went to Lidls while she was there and spent £50, bought too much food really my freezer is now fit to burst and i really need to get organised and meal plan properly.

Pay day tomos, Oct is likely to be spendy as I have lots of Oct bdays as well as starting to pick up Christmas bits.

Oooh I like that idea life

Tomorrow is a NSD as I don't have to do the nursery run. So no buses needed.

I did the shop and it was £70 including £3 of freebies from Sainsburys. And some goodies for our mini break next week. We're taking pasties with us too. Cornish problems

Ooh forgot to say seacow yes we have a name for DD2 and one middle name, but she will have two and we haven't decided the second yet (or first, depending what flows better). Basically DD1 had one middle name and then DS ended up with two. So this baby will have two and when we take her to be registered we will also reregister DD1 which we should have done years ago because we didn't legitimise her after getting married when she was 17 months and she will choose her own second middle name. Probably something from Greek mythology knowing her :o

Man I'm knackered but I've had a really productive day compared to normal. I may regret this tomorrow if I've overdone it. But DH is off so that's cool.

I am LOL at Collies pasties. And naughty Life for being a Boden enabler. I haven't bought the stuff though yet

Thanks for the feedback on my life decisions! It's actually quite a complex decision: I can do freelance work and in fact that would be my default (it's how I ended up with money in a company, now finally liquidated). The plus is that I can choose, within reason, how much I work. Minus is that I will be committed to fixed childcare costs without guaranteed income. And though I can work fewer days I don't think short days would be an option. The childcare dilemma is much more than cost as my income would easily cover the cost, it's the problem of finding someone who would be good for DS and would be a great long term option. It should be possible to find but it feels like an all-eggs-in-one-basket option. And I find it hard to trust an individual looking after my children on their own, as DS is only minimally verbal and will not be able to report what he does or how he is treated (so he is very vulnerable). I know that I am being a bit controlling here but I also know that I would be very nervous about that. He can be difficult to handle at times but needs patience and compassion.

As far as mortgage-free goes, it sounds like a very attractive option for all the reasons you have said. Only... first, and least important as it is emotional reason: we don't really want to leave where we are. On a practical level if we go out of borough we'll have a fight on again to keep DS's EHCP. We do have quite a lot of equity but we'd have to buy somewhere with good transport links to London for DH and that's never much cheaper. So we might have to downsize as well as move away. The other consideration is that even though in the short term we are saddled with mortgage payments, in the long term the longer we stay put the better, as the increase in value of our house has been astronomical. That may go up and down but I still believe that over a long period it will be a very worthwhile investment as it is in an area of London that has been somewhat overlooked /undervalued. And was naice but getting naicer. I worked out that our house's value has gone up by a few thousand for every month we have lived in it. Much less than we are actually paying to live in it . So staying is definitely the best long term investment, if we can afford it.

Anyway, lots to think about and some good advice. Lonely I will get my accountant to work out the tax liability and then pay it asap. And I'll get the coat and one jumper but no more (its the Janelle coat - I already have the lighter hellweathers Mac and it is really truly waterproof and fab, I think it was probably worth the full price though I got it half price at the end of the season a couple of years back. But it's not padded or warm for winter).

And love the yarn! Ssshhh - are you knitting or crocheting for Cagletini? You'll need to get a wiggle on!

Really must sleep, DD will be awake again in less than 3 hours

And Cag I've never thought to deregister DS, also born the wrong side of the blanket. I didn't know that was a thing, what's the advantage? Apart from adding a name of course

Christmas Your discussion of childcare for your ds is very interesting. I always knew that I would want to be at home for my child(ren). I wasn't a robust child myself and I was very glad to have my Mum there for me, and I wanted to do the same for mine. My son is also not very verbal - he can talk - but doesn't tell me what he should iykwim. So I totally understand your concerns and I'm glad for your ds that you are holding that line for him.

We are in a smaller house to be mortgage-free and I think that is a good decision. The peace of mind is great and also the reduced financial outgoings. I have tried all sorts of career options. I made good money through UpWork for a while writing very technical copy for a website, but it was intense work and left me with no brain-space.

In the end I've settled for doing voluntary work for now that keeps my hand in in my particular career, just in case I need to get it back out of mothballs at some point. It doesn't bring money in though, and money would be nice, obviously.

Good luck with thinking it all though. IS your husband's job tied to London? It's much cheaper the further north you go, but my husband's job is tied down here, which is frustrating.