CV with Covid and no-one gives a toss

Rosebuud · 02/04/2022 10:40

Can’t your husband do the shopping etc? I’m assuming they think he can? Covid isn’t serious for most people so they probably are thinking it’s like a cold for you, sorry it’s not.

Original poster

EatSleepRantRepeat · 02/04/2022 10:44

Unfortunately I need him at home @Rosebuud - I'm having trouble even getting to the bathroom by myself at the moment as I'm so breathless and dizzy. It is absolutely not like a cold for many people, but those of us speaking up are being ignored for political reasons

It's not even the lack of practical offers, it's the lack of contact at all - as if everyone's just bored of it now.

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drpet49 · 02/04/2022 10:47

* It's not even the lack of practical offers, it's the lack of contact at all - as if everyone's just bored of it now.*

^But people are bored of it. 2 years of it. Everyone I know is just treating Covid the same as flu.

lazymum99 · 02/04/2022 10:47

Contact 111 or GP and if you are CV you should qualify for the new anti virals. Need to get them before day 5 of symptoms

buffyajp · 02/04/2022 10:47

@EatSleepRantRepeat

Tested positive on Weds, since them have been getting far worse with symptoms, been in bed pretty much since then and using my inhaler several times a day.

Not one person has bothered to check in on me and DH to offer any help. All the friends who were bleating on demanding continuous lockdowns to protect the vulnerable on their social media have disappeared or DGAF, eveb my DM the hypochondriac hasn't texted to ask how I am. My DH has even been suggesting that now it's legal, I can go outside for a walk around in the fresh air to see if I feel better!

Meanwhile when friends have gotten ill I've been offering to do their supermarket shopping, pharmacy runs and even popping little things in the post to cheer them up while they were isolating.

I'm all for not having the population locked down by law, and for people taking personal responsibility to avoid infecting others, but any remainder of support there was has moved on to the next drama-creating, virtue signalling exercise. Frankly I wish they hadn't bothered to pretend they cared about CV people in the first place, or I'd have had time to arrange other support.

I don't know what I'm looking for with my post, just to vent I guess.

So sorry to hear that. I don’t have much useful advice to say but didn’t want to read and run. Make sure you look after yourself first and get plenty of rest.

SnowingInApril · 02/04/2022 10:47

Maybe they think if you need anything you’ll ask?

lazymum99 · 02/04/2022 10:47

They really help to speed up recovery

Smartiepants79 · 02/04/2022 10:49

Would you normally expect them to be doing any of that if you were ill (with anything else) but your husband was fit and healthy and able to look after you??
It’s a bit rubbish that they’ve no checked up on you and asked how you’re feeling but other than that I wouldn’t expect anything more from any of my friends.
My mum would have checked if we needed any help I suppose. But only because of the kids.
Part of the issue will be that it is no longer a big deal for someone to have covid, everyone I know has had it at least once. Also isolating is not a thing any more unless it’s you that’s ill. You have a partner who can go out and shop etc… previously this was not the case and people required more help.
I’m sorry you’re feeling rubbish but I think you’re being a bit harsh on your friends.

rainbowandglitter · 02/04/2022 10:49

Surely you can spare your dh for half an hour or so to go to the shops?

Duracellbunnywannabe · 02/04/2022 10:49

They will assume DH can help. Surely he can order an online shop and if your capable of starting a thread on MN your capable of sending friends a message explaining the situation and asking for help.

BorisKilledMyHusband · 02/04/2022 10:51

Why don’t you pop a message on social media asking for help?

Smartiepants79 · 02/04/2022 10:51

And also, if you actually NEED some help, ask for it!
People are not mind readers and silent martyrs don’t get what they need.

Abraxan · 02/04/2022 10:54

Are you eligible for antivirals? They made a big difference to me.

Can dh not nip to the shops or sort an online food order?
Not sure if it's available where you are but you can get Morrisons food via Amazon in as little as 2 hours. Some areas have things similar to Uber who do food deliveries from supermarkets too.

cloudylemonade13 · 02/04/2022 10:54

Don't think your wrong to feel like that at all and tbqh I'd feel the same. But probably just a case of accepting that we're all wired differently and some people are just better at looking out for others, while others are just a bit more selfish. There's also a lot of covid-fatigue now and a feeling that it's run its course, and I think covid/lockdown deniers on social media have sadly had an impact on a lot of people that just don't take it seriously now.

Attictroll · 02/04/2022 10:55

Must admit I’d assume if a dp was at home under current rules you wouldn’t need anything. A kind what’s app now and then is nice from friends who know. I am currently in bed with it too feeling very poorly but not cev and it is an effort to get out of bed - I am timing things I want to do around wee needs so I don’t exert effort too often. I have heard from best friend and mil -but not my mum despite her knowing 😂 can you speak to dr about anti virals as I know the website has been overwhelmed- I was trying as I’m over 50

Abraxan · 02/04/2022 10:56

And yes, now others in the household can go out people will assume your dh is able to help with those kind of jobs. Do your friends/family know how ill you are and that you need dh with you to help you.

If you can't stay home without him due to illness then let a friend know. I'm sure if they knew someone would be able to drop off some shopping, even if it's a click and collect your dh can organise.

Original poster

EatSleepRantRepeat · 02/04/2022 11:04

@Attictroll

Must admit I’d assume if a dp was at home under current rules you wouldn’t need anything. A kind what’s app now and then is nice from friends who know. I am currently in bed with it too feeling very poorly but not cev and it is an effort to get out of bed - I am timing things I want to do around wee needs so I don’t exert effort too often. I have heard from best friend and mil -but not my mum despite her knowing 😂 can you speak to dr about anti virals as I know the website has been overwhelmed- I was trying as I’m over 50

Sorry to hear you're poorly too! Hope you are managing ok.

Thanks to the people who have posted about anti-virals. Everything I've seen about the anti-virals from the NHS says you'll be contacted by your GP if you're eligible, and the panoramic trial is constantly closed to new applicants every time I check the website, so I'm just trying to get by on my own for now. It's impossible to reach my GP about anything covid related, I'm guessing it just gets filtered out at admin level.

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glitterelf · 02/04/2022 11:04

I understand where you're coming from I too ran lots of errands and did lots of shopping for people throughout the pandemic. I tested positive on Monday thankfully I'd just had a shopping delivery but have started to run low. The plan was that DH go shopping today however he's been unwell in the night and just tested positive so I've reached out and asked for help from one of the people I had previously helped.

The thing to remember though is that things are very different now from earlier on in the pandemic when life appeared to be more relaxed and everyone was on the same page of protecting the NHS and those that were vulnerable. It's not necessarily that people don't care it's that as things have opened up and more people have had it that life has once again returned to being manic for many.

I have too wondered why those who I had helped hadn't offered any help but soon realised they are just busy juggling normal life. Please do reach out and ask for help though because often people don't realise that help is needed especially with the current guidance.

I hope you start to turn a corner soon and feel better, rest as much as you can. My DH is CV so I do understand the worry and like others have suggested you could be eligible for the antivirals

TidyDancer · 02/04/2022 11:05

Can your DH not pop to the shops for a few minutes? Or get an online food delivery?

I can understand you feeling unsupported if people aren't messaging to see how you are, but I'm not sure you're expectations are completely reasonable otherwise. People are probably assuming that since you have someone at home and the rules are now different that you don't require the level of support others would've needed in the earlier stages of covid.

ChloeHel · 02/04/2022 11:05

It’s not like when it first started. If you had the flu would you expect all your social circle to offer to do things for you? They probably think you have a DH capable of caring for you and doing the shopping.

Both my grandparents one CEV 79 & 76 have just had it. They didn’t want any help and were happy to do online shopping. I think it’s a case of now we know more about the virus it will be treated like that of a normal virus. If you need help then why don’t you just ask for it? Your friends won’t know how ill you are with it unless you tell them.

SmellyWellyWoo · 02/04/2022 11:07

People probably assume your DH can look after everything, if he's otherwise fit and healthy. I admit I'd be more likely to be offering to help a single friend/relative than one with an able bodied partner.

Original poster

EatSleepRantRepeat · 02/04/2022 11:11

@cloudylemonade13

Don't think your wrong to feel like that at all and tbqh I'd feel the same. But probably just a case of accepting that we're all wired differently and some people are just better at looking out for others, while others are just a bit more selfish. There's also a lot of covid-fatigue now and a feeling that it's run its course, and I think covid/lockdown deniers on social media have sadly had an impact on a lot of people that just don't take it seriously now.

Thank you for your understanding - I'm not sure whether it's fatigue or whether no-one is giving out gold stars on social media any more. Mum noticed the same when she had cancer - the ones running the marathons for cancer charities and sharing "awareness" posts didn't come anywhere near her when she was ill and actually needed them (but one had the fucking cheek to write her name on their race number without asking).

Someone else mentioned whether I would expect the same with any other illness, and yes, I would. I've supported friends through norovirus and other dreadful illnesses and I would have expected the same for me, it's part of friendship I would have thought?

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FI0N · 02/04/2022 11:13

Tested positive on Weds, since them have been getting far worse with symptoms, been in bed pretty much since then and using my inhaler several times a day

If you are using your reliever inhaler several times then you need to phone your Gp and ask about a preventer.

Original poster

EatSleepRantRepeat · 02/04/2022 11:13

Thank you @glitterelf, hope you are starting to feel better soon too and that your friends bring lots of

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Bagelsandbrie · 02/04/2022 11:18

If you’re so unwell your dh can’t leave you to pop to the shops because you’re dizzy etc then you need medical attention (I say that as someone who is / was in the clinically vulnerable group myself with multiple rare chronic autoimmune issues).