Friend might have covid but won’t test because she doesn’t want to isolate.

[LemonViolets]

What can I say to convince her she has to test?
Or, can I/should I report her if she refuses.

My friend has two teenage DC’, which is probably how she caught it, one of them pretty much her entire group of friend tested positive last week, but her LFT was negative.
Although, friend has said several times before that she doesn’t think her DD takes the LFT properly, so I don’t know how true the negative test is.

For the last couple of days friend has been complaining about feeling rough and says he has a head cold, I told her she should test but she said they only have a couple of LFT left so she doesn’t want to waste them on what is probably just a cold.
Today we spoke on the phone and she was coughing quite a bit with a chesty sounding cough and she sounded really horse, I told her again to take a LFT but she said she can’t, and after a bit of prodding she admitted if she tests positive she won’t be able to work (cash in hand second job so no ability to claim anything and she really needs the money) and she won’t be able to go and stay with her boyfriend while her kids go away for half term next week.
She said she’d rather wait until she had worked this weekend and traveled to her boyfriends house and then test next week if she still feels rotten.

I can understand how disappointing having to change plans is, but I think putting people on the trains she will be travelling on and the people she would be working for over the weekend at a potential risk is not worth it.
and does she really want to potentially expose her boyfriend.
She said no but she doesn’t know if she has covid, so she’ll just wait and see next week.

I think she is being really short sighted and selfish but I don’t know what to say to make her see.

I also don’t know if I should report her if she does continue with her plans regardless.

What would you do?

I know why people are taking rhe piss. In six days self isolation legally will end, and of course you can’t get the police to come round an explain Covid rules. She’s committed no breach as she’s no legal requirement to test

I suspect though the op has signficant anxiety which is driving her. I doubt anyone who didn’t would actually consider calling the police.

We all have to crack on now, op.
And, frankly, why should she lose income when Bojo and his hangers on do exactly as they please?

Wind your neck in. It's absolutely none of your business. I wonder if your friend knows you're looking to drop her in it?

I found myself in the same situation as your friend, though I have 3 much younger kids and a DH who is currently overseas so it is all on me, no other family in the area etc. I just didn't test. Instead I just cancelled all social engagements and simply went out to get the kids where they needed to be and then collect (kids had no symptoms). I wore a mask. Other than that I went out to get some milk and bread.

I simply couldn't afford, in any sense, to self isolate. It culminated today (about 12 days after the start of symptoms). I really wanted to treat the kids to the cinema so do a test just to ensure I was clear - I was.

OP do you follow the news at all?

Isolation is about to end, so it would be pretty pointless reporting anyone, it will make no material difference to spread. And that’s before we get into the fact you don’t know she is positive.

The reason isolation is ending is because it damages the economy, education and public health. It’s only worth having it to protect the NHS, which is presently coping.

So, the idea that a local PC is going to come round and give her a stiff taking to is laughable.

Please get on with your life, leave your ‘friend’ alone, and perhaps consider becoming better informed.

Oh give over.

"Report her" indeed. Are you 12?

There is no law to take a test.

And the isolation is based on tests so she isn't breaking no laws so butt out.

Police will take action if proportionate and in the interest of the public to do so.

Less than a week before mandatory isolation is going to end, I'm figuring that the police might just think its not worth their time.

What do you think OP? Do you REALLY think there is a risk or crime here worth bothering the police for at this stage? Its not like she'd be much of an example and if she was given a talking to thats more likely to cause a loss of respect for the police.

I think the word thats hanging on the tongue is 'jobsworth'.

No she should be isolating. Shes not considerate and thats a matter for your relationship. It is not a matter for the police.

FFS with friends like you who needs 3nemies. Mind your own business. You have fuck all proof of her having covid. Unbelievable. Get a grip.

So much trolling on here.
This cannot be real.
I fear for the world if is.

Go to the police if you're that concerned.

Make sure you tell her and everyone else you are reporting her, you surely won't be doing it anonymously given your strong belief will you?

"if one of our local PC’s came and explained the rules to her she might take it a bit more seriously."

what she'll take seriously is that she can't trust people who are supposed to be her "friends"

I mean, why not report her AND tell her that you were the one who reported. She doesn't live up to the standards of what you want from a friend, so may as well lose the friendship asap.

FFS get a grip
Getting the police involved ?
Really

She hasn't tested positive so she has no legal obligation to isolate.

She hasn't tested positive so she has no legal obligation to isolate.

Exactly no one has a obligation to go for a test, how would you even police it.

OP, it does sound thoughtless and selfish
and not just down to affordability. I wouldn't report though. It's going to become more 'normal' to be like this soon though which seems a nuts baseline to many people, but also ok by others.

You should offer to pay her wages so she can afford to isolate.

Actually I’d tell her you’re thinking about reporting her (to god knows who) because she deserves to know what her friends are really like.

A few weeks ago I was exposed to covid and had all the symptoms. I tested and was negative (PCR and LFT). Coincidentally I do now have covid and my symptoms are nothing like the normal covid symptoms. I don't have a cough for a start. My point being you can't possibly tell that your friend has covid even if she has been exposed to it. There are any number of illnesses flying around at the moment. Leave her alone.

Poor op... this thread didn't go the way she wanted!

I’m really concerned that people think like this.

no one loves a grass
Bloody hell, how old are you? Guess what, they like Typhoid Mary even less.

OP, since you have a relative with CF, keep away from her. TBH, I'd keep well away, permanently, but I don't like selfish people as my friends.

As much as I fully agree with most posters on this thread, they’re being really hard on OP whilst it’s very clear she suffers from bad covid anxiety when reading one of her updates. I feel for her and all these people whose anxiety has gone through the roof and can’t think rationally anymore. The worst thing about covid is all these collateral damages including mental health, undetected illnesses, damaging children education etc. Very sad.

This is where covid anxiety is going to become far more of a problem than covid.

OP, if you didn't get het up about colds and flu before covid, apply that to covid now.

If you did - then get on with it, like you did with flu prior to covid.

It's time to get covid in proportion. It was time a looong while ago, but hey, hype.

And @StarbucksSmarterSister, if you have been to work with a cold , or sent your children to school with one, you are a huge hypocrite. Those things can kill the clinically vulnerable - and used to all the time before covid.

This is why there have been less child deaths and less deaths in many other vulnerable categories during covid.