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Original poster

My sister is a Covid denier

114 replies

Mol1628 · 30/12/2021 14:52

I don’t know what to do anymore. We’ve struggled with her behaviour since the pandemic began. She’s denied covids existence. Refused to believe any of it. She even lost her job because she wouldn’t wear a mask.
She’s been going to protests and still meeting with a new group of friends who she’s met through a local resistance group.

At Christmas we all did LFTs and made sure we were well enough before we met up. She refused. My parents are too soft on her and let her stay over despite my dad being vulnerable.

Christmas Day at parents she said she had a dry throat but it was caused by the wood burner. Boxing Day she said she was fine and she came to our house. Towards the end of Boxing Day I noticed her voice was sounding hoarse. She refused to take a test. My mum asked her to go home but she wouldn’t (she’s been staying over at their house for Xmas) then she got more sick the next day and my dad now feeling poorly.

My husband felt a bit rough today. Took a LF as no PCR tests available. Positive straight away. My dad took a test too and he is also positive.

Sister still refusing to take a test and refusing to leave my parents house.

Am I being unreasonable to say I never want her at my house again? It’s not that she’s given us Covid, it’s the complete disregard for other people. She’s been selfish this entire time. She refused to wear a mask for my grandads funeral and made my mum cry with her behaviour on that day. I feel like this is the final straw and I want to cut contact with her now.

I don’t care if she does or doesn’t believe in Covid, but her complete disregard for other people is something I don’t feel like I can get past.

OP posts:
SirVixofVixHall · 30/12/2021 14:54

Well she does sound incredibly selfish.

Browntile · 30/12/2021 14:57

You wouldn’t be unreasonable at all. Such awful, selfish behaviour. I really feel for you though. What a miserable situation to be in x

Original poster
Mol1628 · 30/12/2021 14:58

She’s horrendously selfish. She’s been making my parents look after her! They’ve just been too scared to put their foot down with her.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mol1628 · 30/12/2021 14:59

Thanks @Browntile I feel dreadful. I didn’t want to deny my children Christmas with their grandparents so we visited now this has happened I just feel awful. I don’t want to create a drama but I’ve had enough.

OP posts:
HoardingSamphireSaurus · 30/12/2021 15:02

If create bloody drama. How dare she refuse to leave?

Your parents have 2 choices. Accept what she is doing and stop talking to you about it or tell her to get out and to take her madness with her.

You can choose what you want, I'd certainly be having strong words about the ramifications of her actions.

Lacedwithgrace · 30/12/2021 15:02

That's so horribly selfish of her. I hope you're all alright and get through it quickly.

Sparkle275 · 30/12/2021 17:54

This is just incredibly selfish and damn right disgraceful for your sister to behave that way. She obviously doesn't have any regard for anyone else's health or feelings by the way she is behaving so I wouldn't hesitate to tell her exactly what I thought if I was in your situation. Hope you're all ok x

Dozer · 30/12/2021 17:56

Sounds like her beliefs have clouded her judgment. Agree her behaviour has been poor.

Your parents are adults and capable of making decisions: they chose to host her and then not to ask her to leave.

You too knew she was unvaccinated and chose to attend.

Dozer · 30/12/2021 17:57

Sorry, see she’s refused to leave. That’s even worse.

gsaoej · 30/12/2021 17:58

How old are your parents?
Are they healthy?

She could easily have hospitalised one or both of them. Hospitalisation doesn’t usually occur until day 5-7.

Pinkchocolate · 30/12/2021 18:11

Your sister is a total knob and I wouldn’t be talking to her again. I really hope this ends ok and you and your family are all ok.
I had a similar situation to you, Covid-deniers stayed with DP’s with “cold, not Covid symptoms”. They did leave once my parents tested positive but it was too late, within the week my parents were both on life support and only one of them survived. People really do show how utterly selfish they are and how little regard they have for their friends and families. I don’t care what people believe but risking others is unforgivable.

Original poster
Mol1628 · 30/12/2021 18:15

I am absolutely aware we made the choice to visit and have her here. The main reason was that we didn’t want to cause my parents stress as they are trying to keep the peace and also wanted Christmas to be nice for my children.

There have been times before we were vaccinated etc that we refused to see her. Obviously I’m now kicking myself that I made the decision to see her.

Parents are mid 60s my dad is vulnerable. Obviously they made that choice too.

They’ve both had both vaccines and booster so hopefully they will be alright.

OP posts:
KCee30 · 30/12/2021 19:54

She sounds like a total utter idiot!

I hope your parents will be alright. If they are triple dosed I'm sure they will be!

I hope you don't catch it either.

sadly she isn't the only one to act like this.

My in laws are a bit anti covid too. Not to the extreme your sister is but similar. It's the most frustrating thing!

Northsoutheastwest76 · 30/12/2021 20:00

I hope everyone gets a mild dose. I too have a denying relative. It is draining so I had to limit contact. We still met up at Christmas though briefly so I get why you and your parents did the same.
She however is selfish and irresponsible.

Wandamakesporridge · 30/12/2021 23:24

Sorry OP that’s awful.

My sister and her family are also Covid deniers - against vaccinations, masks, testing. Wouldn’t even take my DM for her booster.
Refused to do LFTs before we met up at Christmas, even though I asked her please do them for our parents’ sake.
We met up anyway as I thought it would be sad for my children not to see them, and we have very recently had Covid so I feel we are unlikely to get it again so soon.

However my parents are in their 80s and vulnerable, it’s so selfish she won’t even do LFTs ‘in case they get a false positive and have to isolate’.

My parents won’t say anything about it to her, as they wouldn’t want to cause upset. I am really hoping my parents don’t catch anything from them as they are unlikely to survive it. I feel very sad and upset about it, it’s like there’s a side to her I wasn’t aware existed.

puppeteer · 30/12/2021 23:27

This does read badly. She's breaking a bunch of social norms, and taking slightly irresponsible risks.

But as some have said, your parents can make their own judgements. And you haven't really explained their rationale. Are they under her hold in some way, or perhaps mentally incapable?

As a parent, it isn't a great thing to see a child ostracised...

Are you fighting your battle, or your parent's? And if you parent's, do they want you to fight for them?

Theunamedcat · 30/12/2021 23:30

How dare she refuse to leave

I hope she isnt expecting anyone to look after her and her "cold"

Lessofallthisunpleasantness · 30/12/2021 23:32

Trouble is this new variant is really a pretty mild cold so will probably add fuel to her fire.

HelloBunny · 30/12/2021 23:42

Och, it’s crap. I’ve lost a good friend, who’s a Covid Denier (full on conspiracy theorist) (lost the friendship, I mean). I was fine with all of her beliefs, but she can’t be friends with me. However, once the behaviour of these people starts to affect others... They can kindly feck off!

Original poster
Mol1628 · 31/12/2021 07:10

Not only my parents battle as it affects us too! I would never tell them what to do, they can keep in contact with her if they want to, but she’s crossed a line with us.

She’s still refusing to take a test. She says the tests pick up all viruses!

Sorry to hear about other people who are dealing with family like this. It’s been the worst part of the pandemic for me. So draining trying to work out what to do for the best.

I am aware she will more than likely use this as another example that it’s not real/just a cold as she was poorly for a couple of days now seems to be getting better. But I’m not listening to it anymore.

Also agree it’s a side to her I didn’t know existed and it’s impossible to overlook that now. Even once the pandemic has gone, I’ll never see her the same way again because of how she has behaved.

My throat is very sore this morning and I am dizzy. PCR ordered for us all.

OP posts:
ToJabOrNotToJab · 31/12/2021 07:17

@Pinkchocolate

Your sister is a total knob and I wouldn’t be talking to her again. I really hope this ends ok and you and your family are all ok. I had a similar situation to you, Covid-deniers stayed with DP’s with “cold, not Covid symptoms”. They did leave once my parents tested positive but it was too late, within the week my parents were both on life support and only one of them survived. People really do show how utterly selfish they are and how little regard they have for their friends and families. I don’t care what people believe but risking others is unforgivable.
This is awful Shock. So sorry for your loss. Flowers
Worriedaboutethics · 31/12/2021 07:21

@Mol1628

She is selfish

myyellowcar · 31/12/2021 07:24

Give her a rocket and cut her off.

Selfish and absolutely stupid.

Newyearnewme2022 · 31/12/2021 10:59

My intelligent adult dd is going down this path despite her having a CEV younger brother. I met up with her yesterday and she told me she had been with people the day before who have since tested positive on LFT. I wouldn’t have met up with her if I’d known.
Back in 2020 she was claiming it’s just flu.

DaisyNGO · 31/12/2021 11:18

@Mol1628

She’s horrendously selfish. She’s been making my parents look after her! They’ve just been too scared to put their foot down with her.
If she needs "looking after" then she's got to admit to being quite ill. It has to be pretty full on for an adult to need "looking after". What's her excuse for not going home?

Also, I'm wondering how old she is?

I would cut ties with her but that's me.

I hope you feel better soon.