Close to cancelling my vaccination. Please reassure me.

[justanothername2]

Name change for this. I know I’m being overly anxious but I need a hand hold.

My friend is insistent on always sending me doomy messages about the Covid vaccine.

They’re always screen shots of something she’s seen on Facebook. Someone has died, someone has been taken to hospital, someone has had liver failure.
The latest one today is that a 34 year old woman has dropped dead after her vaccine.

Mine is booked for tomorrow and I’m really, really worried.

I already suffer from severe anxiety. I know rationally I shouldn’t pay attention to some random Facebook posts.
I know millions of people have had theirs and have been absolutely fine.

Right now, I’m not rational. I’m panicking and I can’t think clearly.

I’m so close to cancelling my appointment 😭😭

I’ve lived in fear for months now and I’m so looking forward to being vaccinated, but this is just another fear to add to the list 😖

You are more likely to die in an accident on your way to get the vaccine than from the vaccine itself.

Thanks so much everyone.

I’ve messaged my friend and told her her messages trigger my anxiety. They’ve also triggered my OCD.
I’ve been checking my pulse and temperature tonight, for no reason other than I’m so anxious and feel like something is wrong.
Bastard anxiety. 😔

I will keep my appointment. It’s going to be so hard but I know I want to have the vaccine.

OP 2.6 million people worldwide have now died from Covid, having the vaccine will protect you from this disease. Block your idiot friend & go & get vaccinated.

Had mine on monday, had a few side effects yesterday and today but nothing to affect me
You make your own decision but don't be influenced by a friend who has no actual knowledge

My elderly dad caught covid a month after having his first jab.

If he got it; truly anyone can. He only leaves his house for a daily stroll round the park, click and collect shopping etc.

I believe it’s due to the vaccine that he only had 1 day of a fever at 38.2 (which is what led to the test) and has been fine since.

I’ve been vaccinated due to my job as have many of my colleagues and I’ve not heard of anyone having any effects apart from a sore arm and feeling a bit tired.

Well done OP. I'm so pleased and really hope it will help reduce your anxiety once it's done.

@Devlesko

I felt the same OP, so didn't go. So glad I didn't now. It's a very personal decision, do it for you, not others. If you don't want it, don't have it, it isn't compulsory nor something to be seen as a duty to protect others.

I couldn't disagree more. The main reason a person should get vaccinated is to protect other people (unless you are a vulnerable person in which case it is to protect yourself and others).

I really hope they introduce a no vaccination no entry to anything rule. It's probably the only way to persuade low risk and selfish people from agreeing to be vaccinated.
I would give no sympathy to someone who dies after refusing to be vaccinated (would give sympathy to loved ones who have to live with the consequences.

I was offered it (though I am low risk) and had it. Felt rough the next day, but had it to do my bit to stop the spread of the virus.
I find it hard to understand why anyone would refuse to be vaccinated.

I've just booked mine and I can't wait. If your friends FB news is causing you this kind of anxiety, remember that this not official fact checked reports and research from proper sources.
I really liked the post about the Marathon Runner who said that in any crowd of 40k people statistically there would usually be one casualty for one reason or another and I've read the same about stadium crowds etc.
Its not easy to put anxiety away but I'd limit discussions with this fb friend, and grit your teeth, plug in some loud music and go for it. Wishing you luck when you do.

@justanothername2

Thanks so much everyone.

I’ve messaged my friend and told her her messages trigger my anxiety. They’ve also triggered my OCD.
I’ve been checking my pulse and temperature tonight, for no reason other than I’m so anxious and feel like something is wrong.
Bastard anxiety. 😔

I will keep my appointment. It’s going to be so hard but I know I want to have the vaccine.

Well done! There's a whole heap of Mumsnetters cheering you on. Just imagine us, pom poms and all...!

@justanothername2

Thanks so much everyone.

I’ve messaged my friend and told her her messages trigger my anxiety. They’ve also triggered my OCD.
I’ve been checking my pulse and temperature tonight, for no reason other than I’m so anxious and feel like something is wrong.
Bastard anxiety. 😔

I will keep my appointment. It’s going to be so hard but I know I want to have the vaccine.

Well, 'bastard anxiety', yes but ... my friends don't do this to me. And I don't do this to my friends.

I'm very aware that we all carry heavy loads and I just try not to heap stuff on my friends' shoulders.

What she's doing isn't OK.

And I'm willing to bet she's like this about other things, too.

Honestly, you'll do yourself a world of good creating some space between you and this person.

Good friends make you feel better. About everything. They make you glad to be alive and make you feel stronger.

I don't think this person does this, does she?

I'll have your vaccine OP, I'm bloody desperate working as a secondary teacher with 600 people a day and no social distancing. Honestly I'd bite the hand off anyone offering it, I think you'd be mad not to.

I really hope they introduce a no vaccination no entry to anything rule. It's probably the only way to persuade low risk and selfish people from agreeing to be vaccinated.
I would give no sympathy to someone who dies after refusing to be vaccinated (would give sympathy to loved ones who have to live with the consequences.

Honestly, there must be something in the vaccine that turns people into dystopian loving wanna be Handmaids happy to give up their rights once they have had it.

What an absolutely perfect reply

I don't understand why fake stories on SM about the vaccine will make you not want to have it, but the very real stories of the millions of death doesn't?

Even if it's true that a 34 year old woman dropped dead after her vaccine, that doesn't mean that the vaccine caused it. People of all ages drop dead all the time, and while thankfully it's very rare in the 30s it still happens.

These people always get their 'information' from bloody facebook, it seems!

Forget all the Qanon crap your mate is buying into, OP. These absolute brainless idiots are going to aid this shitshow in dragging out even further.

@thecatfromjapan

Good friends make you feel better. About everything. They make you glad to be alive and make you feel stronger.

I don't think this person does this, does she?

I get the impression that she’s also anxious about the vaccine (she’s not eligible yet)
She sends me so much rubbish. I’ve deactivated my social media accounts as I was so fed up of seeing the negative posts about Covid and the vaccine.
But my friend screen shots them to me and tells me why she’s not having her vaccine.

I’m not sure if she’s deliberately trying to make me anxious or if she’s just looking for reassurance.
I can’t offer her reassurance though as the things she sends to me really trigger my anxiety.

She knows my history and so I’m not entirely sure why she thinks it’s a good idea to send me these things.

She's a Job's comforter, OP, not a friend.

www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/Job%27s%20comforter#:~:text=%3A%20a%20person%20who%20discourages%20or%20depresses%20while%20seemingly%20giving%20comfort%20and%20consolation

I am 35 I had the AstraZeneca vaccine yesterday. I had no side effects not even a red or warm arm.

It was so easy and I recommend to all.

@justanothername2 In that case I suspect she probably thinks you feel the same as her about things and is looking for comfort in all of this.

Have you made it really clear that you don’t want to see those kind of articles and screenshots? Have you told her you deactivated your accounts to avoid it? If not, I don’t think she’s being malicious - but definitely make it clear.

The eyes of every reporter in the world, every politician, every healthworker, are on the vaccine rollouts.

If there was ANYTHING going wrong with ANY vaccine, don't you think someone a bit more renowned than your FB friend would be warning the world?

I mean, you've only got to look at the attitude of the EU - UBER hesitant about approving the Oxford vaccine, but having watched what happened in the UK, they have now formally approved it.

Anti-vaxxers would claim a conspiracy of silence - what a conspiracy that would be in this day and age! Literally hundreds of thousands of unconnected people would have to be involved and when you consider how quickly the press leap on any sign of a flaw (e.g. how quickly did the claims about MMR go around?? A LOT faster than the proof Wakefield had fabricated all the data!

In short, it's not credible that the vaccines could be killing people and it be suppressed and as so many have now HAD the vaccine, any doubts that may have lingered over the clinical trials should surely now be banished.

NB I wager your "friend" has a feed full of other nonsense as well? Cancer cures? Alkaline diet? 5G conspiracy theories?

@TalbotAMan

Even if it's true that a 34 year old woman dropped dead after her vaccine, that doesn't mean that the vaccine caused it. People of all ages drop dead all the time, and while thankfully it's very rare in the 30s it still happens.

Swap “vaccine” with “Covid19” and it’s the same reasoning. If you die within 28 days of testing positive (there didn’t use to be a cut off point) then you are included in the Covid19 death stats even if you had other underlying health conditions.

@justanothername2. Well done - on both telling your 'friend' what she's doing, it'll be interesting to see how she responds and well done on getting the vaccination that you want! Snd not buying into her bullshit.

When is your booking?

@Devlesko

I felt the same OP, so didn't go. So glad I didn't now. It's a very personal decision, do it for you, not others. If you don't want it, don't have it, it isn't compulsory nor something to be seen as a duty to protect others.

When they reopened schools in September, I made sure to tell teenage DDs that, as long as they were sensible and careful, if they ended up bringing it home, so that DW or I died or were badly damaged from it, it wouldn't be their fault.

Protecting others works several ways. If I died or was seriously damaged, then the impact on DW and DDs of losing me (and my earnings on which we all live) would be literally life-changing, but not in a good way.

Whether or not I have a duty to protect nebulous 'others', I certainly have a duty to protect them.

@NinetyNineRedBalloonsGoBy

I'll have your vaccine OP, I'm bloody desperate working as a secondary teacher with 600 people a day and no social distancing. Honestly I'd bite the hand off anyone offering it, I think you'd be mad not to.

I hope you get yours soon!!

💐🌼

@justanother

I suppose you recognise the same anxiety in her and are sympathetic. She recognises similar in you - and your sympathy - so she off-loads on you.

The thing is, it's doing you no good at all.

I can imagine how you feel after conversations, even by way of social media, with her: heightened heart-rate, unsettled, trying to distract yourself/concentrate on something else but circling back to her latest topic of anxiety.

That's no way to live, it's not something you should be doing to yourself.

You know you're prone to anxiety; you really need to avoid a massive trigger like your friend.

And it's not doing her any good, either - she should be working on ways of breaking that anxious thought-patterning, not amplifying it.

It's such a shame but I think your sympathy is doing no good for either of you.

CBT may well help.

In a way, acknowledging you have this tendency, acknowledging how much joy it is stealing from you, how it is diminishing your life, and deciding to change, is going to be the best thing you can do.

Like a birthday present. Or even a birthday.

Choosing to put things in place to consciously look away from anxiety is going to completely open you up to a far more joyful life. A life where you actually create time and space to do other things than worry, worry, worry away at anxious, ultimately not-useful, thoughts.

It will be the most amazing gift you have ever given yourself.