Is anyone worried about their primary-age child?

[pistachionuts]

My son is 9 and seriously seems to be struggling mental health wise as the pandemic has dragged on, and seems to be getting worse :( he never had any problems before, was always a happy easy well-rounded child who has now transformed into an anxious boy who loses his temper quickly, cries easily and is always getting stressed and angry.
He hates homeschooling and it’s an absolute struggle trudging through all the work school sets whilst he rubs his eyes and fidgets and stares at the laptop, he always plods on and finishes it but has little motivation and no enjoyment.
I’m trying everything I can to try and make the time at home as nice as possible but there’s only so much I can do.
Is anyone else finding this with their children? He’s like a completely different person im so sad and worried :(

I agree with all those suggesting to ignore the guidelines and allow a primary aged child to meet outside with a friend but unfortunately it isn't so simple if you don't know any of the school mums that well. It feels awkward to suggest breaking the rules to someone when you barely know them. If the government were to change the rules in line with Scotland where under 12's don't count in the numbers outdoors, then this would make things much easier for many people

@KeyboardWorriers - children are at home...but you don't want suggestions to help them at home...what do you want?

[quote BraeburnPlace]@KeyboardWorriers - children are at home...but you don't want suggestions to help them at home...what do you want?[/quote]
At some point, you're stuck. I can conjure up endless activities to fill the day. I cannot conjure up children for her to play with which is what she really wants

As a family, we have followed the rules 99% of the time but today we have purposefully broken them so that my dd could play out in the snow with our next door neighbour...and it has done them both the world of good. They looked so happy racing around the garden together, building a snowman, chatting without a care in the world. It's sad that something so normal would be frowned upon by the rule makers.

My 6yo is falling apart mentally.

We have everything to support a child - nice house, loads of toys, a sibling, loads of love affection and time( both parents key workers but we give as much time as we can). No academic pressure but computer to he able to access school work and space to work. We live in a beautiful area with loads of outdoor to explore and I turn a blind eye if we bump into friends at the park and will let them play for a bit. I would have kept moving last lockdown to prevent play but it feels dracionion.

They are still struggling mentally. They actually say they are sad and angry. Aggressive at night times attacking sibling. Hiding in dens for long periods. They struggled last time but it's a step up again this lockdown.

How the poor kids and parents are doing who don't have the same resources and privileges are coping I don't know. I fear for our children's generation.

We’re only in January too. How will these poor kids be by March if the schools don’t go back?

We are ruining a whole generation. It’s awful.

@DancingQueen85

I agree with all those suggesting to ignore the guidelines and allow a primary aged child to meet outside with a friend but unfortunately it isn't so simple if you don't know any of the school mums that well. It feels awkward to suggest breaking the rules to someone when you barely know them. If the government were to change the rules in line with Scotland where under 12's don't count in the numbers outdoors, then this would make things much easier for many people

Definitely agree with this. I don’t know any of the mums locally and wouldn’t know how to get in touch with them even if I wanted to. I’m a reserved person and don’t make friends easily. We haven’t been in the area long and whilst I say hello I’m not on WhatsApp terms with any of them yet.

This also means we can’t arrange any video calls or games outside of school so he can at least see his friends on a screen.

CodyBurns

Yes, I'm in a very similar situation. I'm sure there are lots of us really. We moved January last year and I find meeting new people really difficult, even pre covid. Everyone is being quite 'sensible' around here and keeping their distance so I've had no luck making any connections. I'm not usually fatalistic and hope it won't be too long before schools go back but every time someone mentions the potential of September opening it makes me feel sick. If it did happen then DS would go from being a bit over 2 to being nearly 4 with no friends, no socialising, nothing. It's a nightmare

@formerbabe - so what do you and others expect anyone to do?
Supporting parents to help their own child - is the most likely option.

Yes, these are really tough times for many people, we are all struggling in different ways. As a parent, more than ever just now, you are your child's main source of support.

I want us to get the rules changed in Eng&Wales so that children young enough to need supervision can still meet friends outside. Like in Scotland.

My 9 year old is the same. We are in Wales and when we went back for a day a week at the end of the summer term and he started playing with his friends again , he was a different child. He hasn't been in school since November due to his bubble popping twice and Christmas. He is so angry and aggressive, he shouts when he is frustrated. I think it's because he can't articulate how he he feeling and it's such a huge change for them. It's so shit. I can't believe this is the way of the world

[quote BraeburnPlace]@formerbabe - so what do you and others expect anyone to do?
Supporting parents to help their own child - is the most likely option.

Yes, these are really tough times for many people, we are all struggling in different ways. As a parent, more than ever just now, you are your child's main source of support. [/quote]
Awww thanks for telling me that...I had no idea. I was just completely ignoring them. Your brilliant parenting advice has been invaluable.

Now what would I like...

Ideally schools open...if not possible, a rota system so my dc gets some time in school

Outdoor kids sports to restart. Professional football is continuing...Why not grassroots kids football?

Children to be exempt from the rule of meeting one person outside. Right now it's illegal for me to meet another mum and child in the park with mine

Oh and before anyone takes my sarcasm literally I'm not actually ignoring my dc!

So relieved to read this post and see other children are behaving out of character, my ds, 7 is like a surge of hormones has entered him. Struggles to do work, tearful and angry every other minute. Wish I could help him. I've taken tomorrow off work to spend some time together no home schooling! We're off on a big walk just two of us

Ideally schools open...if not possible, a rota system so my dc gets some time in school

Outdoor kids sports to restart. Professional football is continuing...Why not grassroots kids football?

These, absolutely. Even a morning or afternoon a week at school would help. As would sports groups or the like so that those people who are more isolated and don't have someone to meet up with can let their children socialise a bit!

Ideally schools open...if not possible, a rota system so my dc gets some time in school

Yes. And considering the amount of key worker children already in ( 26 out of 30 in the case of a PP ) this must be possible surely? It's not too much to bloody ask.

In Iceland where I live, preschools and schools for under 16s have never been fully closed to any children, but during the spring peak we had kids in every other day or only mornings/afternoons. So all children under 16 were getting 50% onsite school. This was bad enough imo but surely significantly better than letting some children attend normally and hanging the rest out to dry.

Route map for schools back demanded by some MPs

Leading news today

I’m glad it’s headline and seen for the failing it is

@MarshaBradyo

Route map for schools back demanded by some MPs

Leading news today

Hopefully this will put some pressure on them to think carefully about the impact an extended school closure would have on children who are not able to go to school at the moment. Unfortunately there have been lots of threats of ‘rebellion’ from back benchers which turned out to be nothing but hot air and bluster.

Cody I know, I think it was only 11 MPs if I heard correctly. Although public opinion is being heard as a result which is the good part.

I have a key worker place this time round for 4 days and it has made a world of difference. During the first lockdown I was very worried for her- lots of negative behaviours and she struggle with no peer social interaction. The day she got back to nursery she was like a different child. She still seems a bit sad because with no wrap around care she is picked up and then plonked in front of the tv for hours but we are so very lucky and I feel for those whose children are struggling but don’t have access to a school place. It would have broken us to have done it again.

I haven’t really read all of the thread, but to start with I think my kids were happy to have a bit more time off at Christmas but now they are getting so low, don’t want to leave the house, they are getting fed up with the online learning. I am so so cross about Christmas I think if it hadn’t been for the mixing we wouldn’t be no where near in the state we are now. I know so many people who mixed and then low and behold caught it. I feel so so worried for my kids.

My DD is struggling every single time we sit down to do school stuff.
She’s just done about 10 min of writing about art, and it was like pulling teeth even getting a few lines of writing done.
She then started crying, as she had a few spelling mistakes I asked her to correct, and says she’s ‘just not good enough’ at anything. :-(
We’ve done some nice stuff this week, but she just doesn’t seem excited about anything. Not bothered about seeing her best friend on a video call, begrudges chatting to grandparents and cousin on calls, and I don’t blame her tbh.
I’m fucking sick of talking to people on video calls too, so I can’t blame her for lack of enthusiasm.

@tigerbear I had tantrums from DS1 today when I asked him to do his writing - he's 5 and doesn't mind the computer learning so much, but writing sends him into a meltdown he is borderline ASD and really going backwards in terms of his social skills. I worry that he will have completely forgotten how to play nicely with other DC and lost all his (already small!) attention span by the time they finally go back...