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Original poster

AIBU to be angry that parents are abusing the (not actually) key worker's at school system?

106 replies

Lucy2509 · 18/01/2021 21:55

Hi everyone. So, I'm a single parent working in a care home, part-time. On very low wages, so I cannot afford a car and cycle everywhere. During the first lockdown, my daughters school really grilled me over what hours I worked, where her dad was, what he was doing and generally pressurising me to not send my daughter to school.
I had to cut my hours to fit in with the schools opening times too.

The second time around, there are twice as many children in her class, and I know that some of them have 2 parents in the home, that are not keyworkers. Yet those children are allowed to go 5 days a week, and mine is only allowed to go 3. AIBU to question the head teachers decision on this?

OP posts:
Mumofsend · 18/01/2021 21:56

Its different rules this time

Original poster
Lucy2509 · 18/01/2021 21:57

Hi everyone. So, I'm a single parent working in a care home, part-time. On very low wages, so I cannot afford a car and cycle everywhere. During the first lockdown, my daughters school really grilled me over what hours I worked, where her dad was, what he was doing and generally pressurising me to not send my daughter to school.
I had to cut my hours to fit in with the schools opening times too.

The second time around, there are twice as many children in her class, and I know that some of them have 2 parents in the home, that are not keyworkers. Yet those children are allowed to go 5 days a week, and mine is only allowed to go 3. AIBU to question the head teachers decision on this?

OP posts:
coronafiona · 18/01/2021 21:57

YANBU. I'm a key worker but can manage at home (badly), so i am. I heard today that half the class are in school ie 15/31 kids. I know for a fact that those parents aren't key workers. Angry

Original poster
Lucy2509 · 18/01/2021 22:01

Please forgive the duplicate post. That still doesn't explain why she can only go 3 days when people, in a 2 parent household, that are not keyworkers, can go 5.

OP posts:
TheKeatingFive · 18/01/2021 22:02

We need a sub forum for these threads.

So I can hide it forever and ignore all this endless harping and speculation.

You know nothing of the circumstances of the families involved.

GrandTheftWalrus · 18/01/2021 22:04

We are both keyworkers but because we do nights and opposite from each other we don't qualify for a nursery place for her. They decided this after letting her go back for 1 day. So dd was upset and thought she had done something wrong.

We needed her in due to hospital appointments etc but they don't count that apparently.

KindKylie · 18/01/2021 22:05

YABU

FlibbertyGiblets · 18/01/2021 22:06

You are not privy to the reasons a space is given to a particular child. Trust the school.

Dont be eaten up with unwarranted envy, what a waste of your time and energy.

DahliaMacNamara · 18/01/2021 22:06

Because it's not just key workers' children who can go. The parameters for vulnerability have been widened too.
100% about the sub forum.

Adamandtheaunts · 18/01/2021 22:08

It's a tricky one. Least time round I was a key worker as per the definition, DH was not and was furloughed. This time round DH's company has written him a weasly letter to day he is one of their key workers (not a critical worker as per the revised guidelines) and they've point blank refused to put him on furlough. This despite only one of their ten locations being open, and most of the staff already on furlough. They've said if he needs to take time off for childcare, it's annual leave or unpaid leave.

Fortunately for us I can mostly work from home and can rearrange hours to fit in the childcare but if he was a single parent he'd be screwed.

There are a couple of days when I can't cover for him and we've already decided he's taking them to work with him. They can sit in the back office with his supervisor. Will be interesting to see how she reacts to having to supervise a 5yo for the day!

emilyfrost · 18/01/2021 22:08

@FlibbertyGiblets

You are not privy to the reasons a space is given to a particular child. Trust the school.

Dont be eaten up with unwarranted envy, what a waste of your time and energy.

Absolutely this.
Original poster
Lucy2509 · 18/01/2021 22:09

Thank you coronafiona.

OP posts:
chesterdrawsneedsgonetoday · 18/01/2021 22:10

I don't think you do know as much as you think you do about other people's situations.

And don't you think that the school will have questioned all the other families too, seeing as they "grilled" you?

That you assume people are abusing the situation, rather than they have satisfied the school's requirements, says more about you than anything else.

I agree, I wish there was a sub forum to hide all these bitter threads.

Singinginshower · 18/01/2021 22:12

YANBU
However it is so difficult for schools balancing their needs with parents needs. I know parents who I would not generally think of as keyworkers, who find it really really hard to juggle work and childcare, with big implications for mental health all round.

FlibbertyGiblets · 18/01/2021 22:14

Hahah.

OP: AIBU?
Everyone apart from One Poster: YABU give your head a wobble love
One Poster: YANBU, tut tut, dearie me, isn't it AWFUL
OP: Ignores Everyone, fawns over One Poster
Everyone: Eyeroll and snigger

DrunkBetch · 18/01/2021 22:18

I'm so bored of people posting this question! Everyone is doing their best! Stop with all the bitterness!

Rainallnight · 18/01/2021 22:18

I’m with you, OP. I’m thoroughly fed up with it.

Original poster
Lucy2509 · 18/01/2021 22:20

No personal attacks please. Be civil. And I have no energy, did you even read my post?! I'm exhausted.

OP posts:
2kool4skool · 18/01/2021 22:25

Do you only work 3 days a week? If so, why should child be in 5?

1Morewineplease · 18/01/2021 22:27

I'm also fed up with the rules. I work in a school too.

Sweettea1 · 18/01/2021 22:28

Same here their are alot more children in school children that do not need to be their. Might aswell have them all back.

HarrietSchulenberg · 18/01/2021 22:30

So you think that the children who are in have parents who suck up to the Head and the teachers all hate you? Is that what you're inferring?

There are an awful lot of children who fall into the vulnerable categories and have to have places made available for them, and you absolutely do not know their circumstances.

Original poster
Lucy2509 · 18/01/2021 22:33

Because, as well as being a keyworker, we are poor. We are doing the work on a phone. I have no printer. She should be classed as vulnerable, but the head won't have it. That is why I wish to challenge her decision.

OP posts:
LegoAndLolDolls · 18/01/2021 22:34

@FlibbertyGiblets

You are not privy to the reasons a space is given to a particular child. Trust the school.

Dont be eaten up with unwarranted envy, what a waste of your time and energy.

Yes I agree. Dont be envious. You can see some things. My dh is a critical worker on the list. But kids are in due to EHCP so vulnerable.

Can we swop places please? You have the place and I don't have a vulnerable child? No amount of schooling is going to fix what he has a EHCP for.

Yesmate · 18/01/2021 22:34

Mind your own business. You need the place three days a week and that’s what you have. You have no idea on a child’s circumstances or struggles, the parents job is irrelevant to that.

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