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Original poster

So how the F are we meant to work?

656 replies

Littlewhitedove2 · 30/12/2020 18:25

3 primary age kids. One parent left who won’t leave their house except the shops much less come anywhere near me or the kids. Inlaws in a similar position.
Primary school closed. It won’t be 2 weeks - it will be far longer than that.
Husband full time work.
I work part time as much as I can around school but not critical worker.
How do women work now?

OP posts:
Allispretty · 30/12/2020 18:40

It's utterly shit! No thought again for working parents. You can be furloughed now for childcare not ideal I know but it is an option for you

Agoodbriskwalk · 30/12/2020 18:40

Even if you are able to work from home how does that work with year r and year 1 kids? How the F are they meant to learn anything?

They’re just little kids. An hour or so a day will be fine. Do you genuinely think they need 6 hours a day at that age?

Hercules12 · 30/12/2020 18:41

cant your dh do some of this?

HandInGove · 30/12/2020 18:42

I think you can ask to be furloughed around childcare reasons but not everyone is eligible for furlough- worth a look at this charity’s advice though.

workingfamilies.org.uk/articles/coronavirus/#time-off-caring

yomommasmomma · 30/12/2020 18:44

It's not only 2 weeks, it's "at least 2 weeks".

Original poster
Littlewhitedove2 · 30/12/2020 18:46

I have one younger and two in KS2 who really are going to be missing out, but they are boys and unfortunately can’t really get on on their own. They just muck around the second I’m not in the room.
The primary school work last time was absolutely awful and non engaging. Didn’t hear a word from them, no work marked or even looked at. No feedback what so ever given except from a vague a well done, even when I asked.
I am self employed. If I don’t work, I don’t earn and we can’t pay bills.
Husband is main earner and on the phone all day. His work don’t give a crap about the kids being at home. He has a team to manage and can hardly take holiday let alone just random time off even if it is a pandemic. His employers arnt even in this country so really don’t have a clue or sympathy of what’s going on here.

OP posts:
BigGreen · 30/12/2020 18:47

It's shot, it drove us to distraction last time. We've already done a stint of isolation after a bubble burst. Thank whatever deity that childminders are open, because I'll get a lot more done with a 6yo around than with a 2yo on the scene as well.

Hophop26 · 30/12/2020 18:48

Can you both do condensed hours, reducing the number of days a week and cover each other for childcare? We did this both full time last time and it meant we didn’t use any leave or drop any hours, it’s tough going but that was 6 months this hopefully won’t be that long

Fully 100% agree this is not a one parent problem if there’s 2 adults, no reason at all why fathers cannot have flexible working, they have all the same rights as mothers to ask for it in normal times and funnily enough usually when they do they get it.

FoxinaScarf · 30/12/2020 18:48

School will catch up their education OP. They are so young they have got many years to make up the deficit. Please don't worry about that side of things.
Older year groups (9, 10, 11, 12, 13) doing GCSE and A level work are more of a concern as they can't really catch up but primary and early secondary the schools will catch them up.

loulouljh · 30/12/2020 18:48

I would give up with the education...you simply cannot do it all. Encourage some reading if you can. Online stuff like rockstars. And that's it.

ReesMoggsGlasses · 30/12/2020 18:49

Has key worker status changed at all since last time?

Is it one parent or two as keyworkers?

Professions the same?

Last time my husband was one and had proof from employer but we didn't use it, this time we need to as I'll crack up otherwise ;am also working ft from home)

stuffedforchristmas · 30/12/2020 18:49

I get that it's rubbish but they're doing what they can to save lives and ensure there is care for people like your children, should they need it. No one is trying to make your life harder.

Shit happens.

Itsnotlikethiswithotherpeople · 30/12/2020 18:49

In exactly the same boat, it does feel like it’s impossible at the moment for women

MichelleScarn · 30/12/2020 18:49

So many people don't care and give such shitty responses when we vent. And am pretty sure the majority of the 'you just have to deal with it, make it work' people are not experiencing this shit show, or their jobs are unaffected. But also wouldn't be shocked if this is the group that will be aghast and outraged when services etc functionality change due to reduced staffing!

Kaliorphic · 30/12/2020 18:50

Are you able to negotiate with work to free you up for an hour or so a day to concentrate on their work? The one to one from you is worth more than it would be at school purely because it is 1:1.

BunsyGirl · 30/12/2020 18:50

@Agoodbriskwalk My (August born) year 3 cannot cope with remote learning. Please let me know what you suggest. If we opt out and he falls behind his (private) school will move him down a year or ask us to remove him from the school entirely. Either of those scenarios would have a massive impact on his mental health.

Oh, and my DH helps out massively but he runs his own business. If he pisses the clients off our mortgage doesn’t get paid. Choices, choices, choices....

LastTrainEast · 30/12/2020 18:50

"children and women punished again" maybe you could have it out with the people in the other threads who believe the government were only keeping schools open because they hate kids and teachers and wanted them to get sick.

I've been reminding people for ages that closing schools has consequences so I'm sympathetic, but whichever way the government goes they are doing it on purpose because they are evil.

stuffedforchristmas · 30/12/2020 18:50

As for their education, it's really not necessary to work at home for long at all to keep up with a school curriculum. And if you don't, there will be arrangements for the many children in that position. Schools will be primed to help them catch up.

Hercules12 · 30/12/2020 18:51

I'm glad to be single as not sure I could cope having all the responsibility when there are 2 adults in the house but only 1 doing anything.

stuffedforchristmas · 30/12/2020 18:52

And am pretty sure the majority of the 'you just have to deal with it, make it work' people are not experiencing this shit show, or their jobs are unaffected.

No, that's not the case.

littlestpogo · 30/12/2020 18:52

I’m a single parent wfh full time with two primary. One has SEN and cannot access online learning.

I know it is necessary but I feel completely broken at the thought.

stuffedforchristmas · 30/12/2020 18:53

BunsyGirl

What have you tried? How do you mean, can't cope. And do you actually want suggestions.

Babyroobs · 30/12/2020 18:53

@Littlewhitedove2

3 primary age kids. One parent left who won’t leave their house except the shops much less come anywhere near me or the kids. Inlaws in a similar position. Primary school closed. It won’t be 2 weeks - it will be far longer than that. Husband full time work. I work part time as much as I can around school but not critical worker. How do women work now?
You will both need to take seperate annual leave days maybe to cover the next couple of weeks ?
MsJaneAusten · 30/12/2020 18:54

Don’t worry about the education side. Make sure they read every day and then use Timetables Rockstars or similar every day or so. School will catch up the rest.

As for work, DH needs to speak to his boss. Even if he could so one day a week at home (longer hours at work the other days?) that would presumably give you some time for self employment?

ineedaholidaynow · 30/12/2020 18:54

What do you expect them to do? Because no matter how many times Boris said schools are safe, they really are not.