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Tier 4 - can I form a support bubble and go stay with my parents?

425 replies

yellowtail1 · 19/12/2020 16:49

I live in London with my DH and our 10 week old baby. Can we go and stay with my parents (who live in a tier 2 area) over Christmas by forming a support bubble and if so, how long could we stay with them for? Sorry if this is a stupid question - my head is all over the place and I’m just so confused. Can anyone help?

OP posts:
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8
MRex · 19/12/2020 19:56

Talk with your parents and decide, it's legal if you want to go and neither household has had another support bubble in the last 10 days. Ideally you won't travel out of Tier 4 from tomorrow onward (i.e. go and stay for weeks), but it is legal even if you do:
www.gov.uk/guidance/making-a-support-bubble-with-another-household

DontStopThinkingAboutTomorrow · 19/12/2020 19:57

@Leafyhouse

I'd head out before midnight if I were you, and stay with your parents. London sounds like plague-ville.
If everyone did this, the whole country would be plague-ville. I think that's why they announced it so late the night before- to stop exactly this happening
cupcakesandglitter · 19/12/2020 19:57

[quote ouchiezz]@cupcakesandglitter yeah go ahead and get your support for the magical days over Christmas then go back home and spread covid around so we're never out of this cycle.

I want to know how often these bubbles will be used after Christmas.. Hmm[/quote]
I very highly doubt that the OP is going to form a bubble and then after Christmas go around spreading COVID around to absolutely everyone because Christmas is over. Get a grip

Yaty · 19/12/2020 19:58

@yellowtail1

I’m not at risk of loneliness but my mental health is rock bottom. I had a terrible time with the birth of our baby, DH and I are facing massive financial struggles due to COVID. I feel so hopeless.
Please go, it is allowed and absolutely necessary. Im saying this as a new mum who had pregnancy and baby in lockdown its been fucking rough. My parents are my support bubble and I will be travelling to see them tomorrow.
Grenlei · 19/12/2020 19:58

@ohwhatamiserableyear

It won't be a support bubble, will it though. Because they're not local to you.

Stay home.

You're wrong. No requirement a support bubble has to be local. Mine is nearly 200 miles away.
Yaty · 19/12/2020 20:00

@QueenoftheAir

your household includes a child who is under the age of one or was under that age on 2 December 2020

This means if you're a SINGLE PERSON household ... that's been pretty clear for weeks. If you have a spouse/live-in partner, you don't need a support bubble. Support bubbles are for single person households.

Please don't make it harder for those of us who really need the support, because we are single person households.

You are completely wrong and an unsympathetic arse as well.
cupcakesandglitter · 19/12/2020 20:01

@Yaty yes to this. Same here! It's been so lonely and horrible! I hope you're doing well too

Absolutely ridiculous that new mum's are on here being unsupported. Where is the compassion?!

Yaty · 19/12/2020 20:06

People are so far up their own backsides, no compassion for others situations and on a forum for parents too. Its actually enraging some of these replies. Anyway I'll be off to my parents 300 miles away and in a lower tier tomorrow as they are my support bubble and I won't be feeling bad about it in the slightest.

mumsyandtiredzz · 19/12/2020 20:06

OP is within the rules, had a traumatic birth 10 weeks ago and is suffering with mental health, yet people on here calling her selfish for wanting to be with her parents.

SufferingFromLongLockdown · 19/12/2020 20:07

@Yaty

People are so far up their own backsides, no compassion for others situations and on a forum for parents too. Its actually enraging some of these replies. Anyway I'll be off to my parents 300 miles away and in a lower tier tomorrow as they are my support bubble and I won't be feeling bad about it in the slightest.
I'm surprised that so many people want to control the actions of one new mother on social media.
FlamboyantMustard · 19/12/2020 20:11

@QueenoftheAir

your household includes a child who is under the age of one or was under that age on 2 December 2020

This means if you're a SINGLE PERSON household ... that's been pretty clear for weeks. If you have a spouse/live-in partner, you don't need a support bubble. Support bubbles are for single person households.

Please don't make it harder for those of us who really need the support, because we are single person households.

I've got a DH, in the emergency services, i had 3 kids at home throughout lockdown, one a newborn, and severe PND. Here is my Christmas gift to you - read the guidelines before spouting your nonsense, and don't pretend to know who really needs the support. There is zero support for PND sufferers out there right now, and I had thoughts of causing harm to myself because of it. I have a DH but as I said he was still out working. Before the support bubbles for under 1 were introduced it was genuinely terrifying every time he left on shift - particularly the night shifts.

OP - go - you have PND get all the support you can.

ineedaholidaynow · 19/12/2020 20:11

I think the problem is that there are now a number of threads with people asking about whether they can make their parents a support bubble just when they have been told they can’t form a Christmas bubble. We have also been we are in a terrible position in respect of the virus , hence no Christmas bubbles. I assume many people will now be arguing their parents are their support bubble just so they can have the Christmas they had planned. How is that going to help?

Yes if you had already been in a support bubble but to suddenly form one today.

Yaty · 19/12/2020 20:13

I'm hoping its just the months of stress and fear that have sent otherwise kind people selfish rather than a real reflection of ppls beliefs.

funfunfunfunfun · 19/12/2020 20:13

Because you have your DH to spend the day with and for support I would just stay home.

XingMing · 19/12/2020 20:14

I bet the roads out of London and the SE are congested this evening.

NewMum0305 · 19/12/2020 20:14

There are going to be some legal exemptions to the rules about travelling out of Tier 4 areas (which could include travelling to a support bubble) but these haven’t been published yet.

Suzi888 · 19/12/2020 20:17

Yes you can, BJ prefers us not to. You do qualify so you can go.

People don’t read the guidance properly as it changes so often.

Yaty · 19/12/2020 20:17

People are absolutely allowed to decide who is their support bubble and if it is their parents then what is it to you. She is allowed to bubble with another household. Do you not think having first Christmas with the baby after a pregnancy and birth this year mostly alone and with crap mental health she may need the support from her parents, not further weeks ahead lonely and isolated with a newborn! It is not up to you to judge at what time and when people chose and see those in their bubble.

Crimblecrumble1990 · 19/12/2020 20:18

As far as I can see...

Yes you are eligible to form a support bubble

Yes you can spend Christmas with support bubbles

However It is 'advised' that your support bubble are local to minimise travelling

AcornAutumn · 19/12/2020 20:20

@Yaty

People are so far up their own backsides, no compassion for others situations and on a forum for parents too. Its actually enraging some of these replies. Anyway I'll be off to my parents 300 miles away and in a lower tier tomorrow as they are my support bubble and I won't be feeling bad about it in the slightest.
Glad to hear it. Enjoy.
Thefaceofboe · 19/12/2020 20:23

I think you can but you are just doing it to get out of current restrictions so no.

Maryann1975 · 19/12/2020 20:23

@SufferingFromLongLockdown Unfortunately it’s not just one new mother on social media is it. Massive amounts of people in real life are bending the rules to suit their situation (I’ve just been reading a thread about a parent whose son is meant to be coming home from Scotland for Christmas and asking if that would still be allowed as they are his support bubble. I know exactly People are doing it, we are all fed up with the Covid crap.

One of the speakers on the briefing said one of the reasons no one was meant to leave or enter tier 4 was because there is a new strain circulating there. If people are moving in and out Of the south east, they will move the new strain about. COVID doesn’t care if it is your support bubble or not and when cases of the new, more contagious strain are rife Across the country in January, this will be the reason why.

There will always be valid reasons for needing to form a support bubble, and having a 10 week old baby is a Government reason for doing this, the op needs to be honest if she is forming this bubble for actual support or if they are doing it to have a better Christmas and if it’s the latter, then no, they should not be travelling.

Mydogmylife · 19/12/2020 20:24

@Monstermissy36

My son rushed to pack and jump on a train so he can be home in our tier 2 area before midnight... very stressful couple of hours 🙈
The very thing that Chris Whitty advised against in this afternoons briefing
Mydogmylife · 19/12/2020 20:25

@Yaty

People are absolutely allowed to decide who is their support bubble and if it is their parents then what is it to you. She is allowed to bubble with another household. Do you not think having first Christmas with the baby after a pregnancy and birth this year mostly alone and with crap mental health she may need the support from her parents, not further weeks ahead lonely and isolated with a newborn! It is not up to you to judge at what time and when people chose and see those in their bubble.
Is she isolated or does she have her partner with her?
emilybev1986 · 19/12/2020 20:27

Do what you like.

They can't police it anymore.

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