Is anyone else keeping Covid a secret??

[Sadhoot]

I had a very bizarre conversation with my mother this evening. She has Covid, as does the entire household.

She was talking about it in hushed tones, like it's something to be ashamed of, like it's a scandal. She said that "some people" will want nothing to do with you if they find out you have it, so I should keep the fact that I have Covid to myself as well. She's literally not telling anyone except her work, as she has to self-isolate.

We’re self isolating after my SIL tested positive last weekend, we all followed the rules however her gym did not. Haven’t put it on FB and told a few friends who TBH have not been sympathetic and treating us like outcasts.

The way I see it, it’s quite likely to happen to most families by next year, we’ve just been the unlucky first ones. Unless people hide away for a year (obvs shielding is different) it can be caught easily- as we have found out! I can see why people feel the shame but I would rather talk about it and educate people so they can make better choices!

My boilerman told me that many people who had been customers for many years wouldn't allow him into their homes to service their boiler because his daughter was working on the covid ward and she lived at home.

I wouldn't tell anyone who didn't need to know, to be honest. Early on I wouldn't have been bothered, but now it seems that there's judgement. As though, if you followed all the rules you wouldn't have caught it, so it must be your own fault.

That might be because I live alone, so it's not as though anyone could introduce it into my house maybe? But anyway, yes, I wouldn't be telling anyone who didn't need to know.

i am worried about judgy remarks.

There are so many posts on our local Facebook pages congratulating people for obeying the rules in our area and keeping the numbers low. We have low numbers because we live in a rural low population area. If there is an outbreak people are condemned. Catching Covid is seen as a moral failure! I would not be sharing my diagnosis with anyone.

The hysterical public response to Covid (especially on Mumsnet) speaks volumes about why some people would keep it secret: it must be their fault, they must have flouted the roolz, they must have flocked to the beaches in summer, they must have not worn their mask properly at the school gate, they must have been shopping for non-essential clothes for their children in cold classrooms, it must be poetic justice for failing to clap for the NHS one Thursday in April.

Some of these posts make me despair. Would you expect a moral judgement on youif you caught flu? If you caught norovirus? If you live with anyone working or being educated outside the home you don't control the situation. Please stop perpetuating the fear and blame.

@WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants

No licking people or door handles here. Family of teachers and key workers so it was bound to happen at some point. Still feels crap though.

I was contacted by track and trace to isolate for being in contact with someone for being in a shop! I felt really embarrassed about lt and felt like I would be judged for having gone there even though loads of people were there! So I can see how your mum would not like to tell anyone

I've had it recently and my two DCs also caught it. I was upset that our family was the reason children were sent home from school but I realised that keeping it a secret would be impossible and unfair on them. I didn't want them to feel that they had to hide a dirty secret when we had rigourously stuck to the rules and been extra careful due to health conditions.

I told my family and work and the DCs told a couple of their close friends but the story inevitably spread. People have been fine with us to be honest. I know that we stuck to all the rules and still caught it. That's all that matters.

Not exactly keeping it secret, but I am waiting on results for my daughter and we haven't told anybody (except her school and our work obviously) because we just don't want to deal with people asking questions (asking for the result when we don't know how long it will take, certain people who believe they know better than doctors telling us that of course she doesn't have it, asking where she could have got it from, if we have been making her wash her hands enough etc.)

I told everyone

I dont care who knows.

I posted a support thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/coronavirus/4053589-A-positive-test-my-journey-so-far?pg=6&messages=25

I was hauled over the cloaks by a very unpleasant poster called Damefanny who then started a whole new thread based on how irresponsible people like me were.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4055265-AIBU-to-be-shocked-that-this-isnt-common-knowledge

Some people are just small minded and need to get a life. Luckily I dont know any of them in real life.

Hauled over the coals

The cloak is the cloak of immunity that I am now wearing!

I only told 3 people. People are very funny about it and so I didnt want the hassle. I can see exactly where your mum is coming from.

I worked through mine and so felt I had to tell people as I was coughing a bit on zoom.

You're absolutely right. Its become very hush hush. The care home I work in are so clock and dagger about it. Had an outbreak and one staff member put on fb they had it and they were told to take down their post, that nobody must know. We are not told if another staff member tests positive, you may hear on the grapevine but we are told we will lose our jobs if anyone finds out.

I think there's so much hysteria about it, that I can completely understand why your Mum doesn't want people to know about it.

I have no problem with who knows if I have it.
There are those who you need to tell (family and work), and the rest I would say if it comes up in conversation.
I can understand businesses not wanting public disclosure of it, just in case it swades people away from them. And that may extend to their employees.

@CovidClara fair play to you! I am saddened that others feel ashamed.

It does seem to carry a stigma, there are a few cases in my village and people are gossiping in hushed voices like it’s a dirty secret. If I caught it I would keep my mouth shut and isolate quietly.

In China, they believe that someone who's had the virus is likely to get it again. Landlords and employers discriminate against them.

Great thread @covidclara and what a shame it got hijacked. Am still scratching my head at people calling it a 'stigma', it's not gonorrhoea.

I wasn't bothered who knew when I had it. In fact I was posting about it online as back then right at the start nobody knew anyone who'd actually had it, and I wanted to put an honest description of each day and what it'd been like. People seemed to appreciate it.

My mum has it and she has told her children & her workplace. Nobody else, I think she worries people will blame her if they now catch it

A women I knows parents had covid she told us in hushed tones and said ive not been near them a few times,it was really weird I think people are embarrassed about it or something.