Absolutely sick of the judgement, insults and negativity from both sides of the fence

[Completmentfille]

Just have to say this. This site is a fucking dumpster fire at the moment. On the one hand people going around denying covid is a thing, saying it's "just the flu", we should open everything up, screw the elderly and vulnerable, saying it's a government ploy to control us. On the other hand we have the salivating lockdown crew, calling all and sundry a "covidiot", angrily curtain twitching because their neighbour had their mum round for a cup of tea, shouting "IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU, YOU'RE NOT SPECIAL", blithely dismissing people's very real mental health struggles due to lockdown and insisting "YOUNG AND HEALTHY PEOPLE DIE FROM COVID", when the actual data clearly shows that, by and large, they don't.

Can we have some fucking balance please.

My personal situation is this. I have a mum who suffers badly with her mental health and also has a physical health condition which makes her potentially vulnerable to covid. She lives with my adult sister who also has mental health problems. Until 2 December, I won't see either of them per the lockdown rules. If the lockdown is extended, I'm afraid I will be seeing them because at that point the risk of them being isolated is higher than the risk of me infecting them with coronavirus. I may well pull my DS out of school in order for me to do this. Am I, in any way, the same as someone have 100 people over for a christening party, or someone having eight friends from eight different households round for dinner? Am I just meant to be "community spirited" about this and ignore them for months on end? And please fuck off with Zoom because no it is not the same and no it does not help.

It would be extremely nice if there could be a little bit of empathy on both sides here. It would be nice if the anti lockdowners could stop sneering at the very real concerns of teachers, HCPs and other people at risk of contracting covid from their jobs. It would also be nice if the pro lockdowners could stop being sneery and condescending about people's mental health and stop implying that lots are just making things up to bend the rules. That isn't for you to decide. You don't know what is going on behind closed doors.

There's a real truth to the quote to be the change you want to see in the world.

The reality is that all the general ranting you can do will still not bring about change. The best you can do is be the empathetic voice on the threads, where there is none.

Role model the behaviour you want to see. Don't just rant and people and expect them to:
a) recognise themsleves in your rant (and
b) change as a result

@Completmentfille sorry, my comment wasn’t aimed at you - it was just a general observation really.

For every person's standpoint there is an opposite one in regards to Covid-19.

It will continue until the virus is no longer a consideration for political decisions and long after as the fallout is being assessed.

It is possible to be empathetic and selfish.

I'm not sure it makes much difference anyway. People see what they want to see.

It is possible to be empathetic and selfish.

To be frank, most people are selfish. They care about themselves and their loved ones. That's human nature.

@Completmentfille

It is possible to be empathetic and selfish.

To be frank, most people are selfish. They care about themselves and their loved ones. That's human nature.

And the society their children will grow up in. So trust some people do care about the wider community.

So trust some people do care about the wider community.

Yes but it'll depend what makes up your own wider community and what you see in your day to day life.

I work with abused women and people suffering with their mental health so that section of society matters a great deal to me.

That's not to say I don't agree with lockdown btw, but it has been catastrophic for abuse victims and for those with mental health issues. And they have been largely ignored by the system.

people will say "oh but fleeing abuse is allowed" but the thing is it is so much more nuanced than that.

you might get someone coming on here posting that their kids are driving them crazy in lockdown and their husband is WFH, so would it be ok for them to take the kids to stay with grandparents for a week. And she would be met with a chorus of "stay the fuck at home" "stop bending the rules to suit you" "look after your own kids" "suck it up and stop whinging" etc. I know that because I've seen it before on here, multiple times.

But you don't know what's going on behind closed doors. For all you know her husband could be emotionally abusing her and her children and she just hasn't quite worked that out yet. There is always nuance.

It is completely different than if someone were to post saying "AIBU to host a birthday party for 25 children".

And some people with mental health conditions have felt calmer because they prefer a society that distances and uses hand sanitizer and feel more understood.

Not many perhaps, but as I said there is always an opposite standpoint for any position.

I am not belittling anyone's position by the way.

And some people with mental health conditions have felt calmer because they prefer a society that distances and uses hand sanitizer and feel more understood.

Actually from a personal perspective lockdown hasn't exacerbated my mental health problems at all. I'm super introverted and very anti social.

But many of my clients have been dreadfully affected, and my mum certainly has. It's been awful knowing I can't be with her.

So trust some people do care about the wider community.

That’s lovely but it’s of little comfort when I’m on the verge of losing my home.

Op, you can only speak from your own perspective. You can only imagine what others think and feel. That's same for others.
I get you that sometimes what we read here is truly depressing. But getting angry won't help, ime.
And people do care. At least I do, and assume many do too. Of course I am selfish in a way, but I am also empathetic too.

Gosh, I didn't realise swearing (shock horror) meant you had no empathy

@lostallhope77

So trust some people do care about the wider community.

That’s lovely but it’s of little comfort when I’m on the verge of losing my home.

And we are doing everything we can to limit transmission, at personal cost, not just financial, I could list the affects on our family but no one on here really cares, plus it doesn't change things.

We don't want this situation either.

@DownThePlath

Gosh, I didn't realise swearing (shock horror) meant you had no empathy

I think that the fucking point about shitting swearing is that, as soon as you fucking do, it turns a reasonable cunting sentence into something that sounds a damn sight more fucking aggressive. Which doesn't tend to give the fucking impression of bloody empathy.

Maybe in your world 😂

Does it? Everyone I know swears, including at work. It's context, isn't it? If I say "argh, it's fucking raining again" to a colleague, it isn't exactly the same thing as telling them to shut the fuck up, is it.

@Completmentfille

Does it? Everyone I know swears, including at work. It's context, isn't it? If I say "argh, it's fucking raining again" to a colleague, it isn't exactly the same thing as telling them to shut the fuck up, is it.

Of course not lol. God knows what world some of these posters live in

I agree with you OP. No easy answers here and people can legitimately disagree without being selfish.

I do my own form of shutdown. I've no idea what the rules are but I think I do have some common sense . I'm lucky . All my family have someone so I'm not too worried about their mental health . I would however go visit them like a shot if they were suffering due to shutdown , whether I'm allowed to or not . I keep my fingers crossed that the children are to stay in school and that their parents are allowed to work , not just my family but the whole country . I can't stand the thought of people losing jobs if places can remain open. Again I'm not talking about my family who are in mostly secure jobs , but Alan over the road with 3 kids and a mortgage and Julie round the corner who is a single mum and struggling to get by . I'm a pensioner with underlying health conditions who was told to shield last time and I'm more concerned about others than I am of myself . I am antisocial so hardly ever go out . I prefer to be at home where I should be safe but I'm not as I have a granddaughter at secondary school and my daughter is a hospital nurse working with covid every day . Both are at risk of passing covid on to me . It's not happened yet and I'm not sat worrying about it . What will be will be

And we are doing everything we can to limit transmission, at personal cost, not just financial, I could list the affects on our family but no one on here really cares, plus it doesn't change things.

Big whoop. Unless you’re at risk of losing your home you just don’t get it @frozendaisy.

The world is radging and full of negativity at the moment. It's increasing draining.

Oh please You're in favour of the school's being closed? Not very empathetic there are you about children losing out and what will parents do for childcare if the school's close?

Surely the whole point of the thread is that you can have your own opinion, but that shouldn't stop you from being empathetic and understanding that there are reasons why people hold the opposite opinion.

It is perfectly possible to be personally in favour of schools closing, while fully understanding why many people are not in favour of it.

You could just as well snap at someone who wants schools to remain open "Oh please! You're in favour of schools staying open?! Not very empathetic about school staff with no PPE, or about vulnerable family members of kids going home from their bubbles of 200 kids, are you?!"

Well OP that's your point thoroughly proved
Site is full of dickheads just now.

Its a sweary fucking site and always has been, don't get the pearl clutching around that but then again people will pick up on anything to have a piss and a moan about just now.