I'm so angry...

[MaryShelley1818]

We are in an area with local restrictions so high transmission rates in the North East of England.

Someone I know had her 40th at the weekend and photos on FB of her having a party in a pub, cake presents, her and kids, her parents, her sister who works at a local University in a very high position, and about 4-5 friends. No Social Distancing, drinking, cuddling, shots, photos.
How are people just carrying on as normal??!! How can you be so bloody thick as to post all the photos on FB. Am I missing something?? I'm furious.

We've followed every single rule but seems I'm in the minority and the longer people just do whatever they want for, the longer I'll have to go without seeing my friends and family.

I must be Odd as must all my friends who are or have turned 40 this year
Not one single party hasn’t even crossed our minds to do so.
I’m with you op it’s not hard to make sacrifices like a bloody birthday party for the greater good of our society, our local community hell even ourselves and our families to avoid getting and spreading this bloody virus.
I don’t get the mindless selfishness I really don’t.

@Itisasecret

I can’t get angry at this. People should risk assess themselves. The government have lost control, they have no idea what’s going on. Let people socialise and take their own risks. They don’t give two shits about teachers who have been forced into close contact, indoors, with no PPE. Why the outrage if Sally down the road wants to see her family? For all you know she could have been suicidal, or have an illness she didn’t tell you about. I wouldn’t begrudge anyone a bit of happiness to be honest. At the moment we have become people who are told to go to work. That’s it, we are living to do what we are told by Boris. No thanks.

I can get angry with this! So it doesn’t matter to you if you catch Covid, perhaps because you are young and in good health, so you should recover okay? You also don’t care if you then infect someone (perhaps an elderly relative) and they catch Covid and die?? How absolutely selfish!!

It is people like you and those in the OP’s post who are guilty of spreading this Virus. It is because of people like you, that others will be unable to see their families, because we follow the rules and want to minimise the risk to our loved ones!

The most annoying thing is that if you do catch this Virus and it makes you seriously ill, you will expect the nurses and doctors to risk their lives treating you!

@TheDailyCarbuncle

Well if it's so utterly vital to protect the vulnerable *@vanillandhoney* surely we have to protect them from every single infection they could ever get? So restrictions should continue forever. Because we've decided now that all that matters is that people don't get infections. It doesn't matter if people can't eat because they have no job, their death is nothing compared to a death from infection. Infection is all that matters.

Its not the same. If 1500 die a day and at peak 1000 were dying of covid. Then it needs to be mitigated surely you can see that. At flu levels you would have a point. It is not at flu levels.

@TheDailyCarbuncle

I find the idea that if everyone followed the rules everything could go back to normal utterly incomprehensible. Is it the case that people really believe that we can follow rules for a while (how long?) and covid will just disappear or something?

Yes, like in china and new zealand where they now can live normal lives. Whereas we keep blundering on and on.

I will wear my mask, I will wash my hands, I will follow the one way systems and keep my distance. I won’t socialise Indoors with friends or colleagues and won’t go to busy places. That’s where it ends though. I will go and visit my Family. I will have family around to my house, in fact I’m having a BBQ on Saturday. I actually couldn’t give a shit what other people think about that.

@MaryShelley1818

It's not my new normal at all. I hate living like this. I'm depressed, lonely and isolated. You really are just trying to be insulting because it's clear that I'm upset because I'm following the restrictions. I'm VERY clearly not happy. I work in a responsible job though where not following the law isn't an option as has been made clear by many emails. I guess I could just jack it in, not follow restrictions and stop giving a shit about others and then apparently I'd be a better person according to you.

I'm so sorry to read this. Depressed, lonely and isolated is no way to live. This whole situation is rotten.

I agree so much with @TheDailyCarbuncle and I'm so bloody sick of 'people can be so selfish' being thrown around on here all the time.

I supported lockdown initially and I don't honestly know how things could go completely back to normal, but then I also think how long can we keep decimating entire industries, and all the things that make life actually worth living?

I've said it on other threads but there has been no balance and no acceptance of the fact that this is just a shit situation and there is only so much that is viable for society to do and some restrictions go well beyond what is reasonable to expect human beings to do.

For all those who want to talk about 'selfish' people, yes people should have social responsibility, but honestly how far does that extend to? Did we all used to worry about passing flu to the vulnerable in winter? Did smokers always used to make sure they never breathe smoke all other people? Do you all give all of your spare income to charity? Consider the impact on the environment- never make short car journeys? The list could go on and on.

Does no one think it's equally selfish to expect so many people, many of them at the beginning of their working lives, to lose their jobs? Their was already a growing generational divide and Covid has made it so much worse. For every claim of 'rule breakers' being selfish, there is a counter claim of how selfish it is to expect so many people, especially young people, to sacrifice so much for a virus that is unlikely to harm them (and they seem unlikely to be offered a vaccination for).

Are we really happy to live in a society where it's selfish to see your elderly relatives? Where a grandparent wanting to hug their newborn grandchild is told no? Where we can no longer choose to spend time with three friends because, heaven forbid, it's more than two households mixing.

It's selfish because it passes on a virus that is killing thousands upon thousands of people.
Restrictions won't last forever, we will get treatments and vaccines.
Until then we need to look after the vulnerable In society who might DIE.
You can't recover from death. You can never see someone again or cuddle them after they are dead and buried.

@rorosemary do you seriously think being confined to your country, unable to travel, unable to have visitors or tourists from other countries, as the situation is in New Zealand, counts as a 'normal life'?

@VillageGreenTree

Are we really happy to live in a society where it's selfish to see your elderly relatives? Where a grandparent wanting to hug their newborn grandchild is told no? Where we can no longer choose to spend time with three friends because, heaven forbid, it's more than two households mixing.

It's selfish because it passes on a virus that is killing thousands upon thousands of people.
Restrictions won't last forever, we will get treatments and vaccines.
Until then we need to look after the vulnerable In society who might DIE.
You can't recover from death. You can never see someone again or cuddle them after they are dead and buried.

Yes, so all the people who are avoiding their elderly relatives, many of whom will die of other causes - stroke, heart disease, cancer - will never get back the time they are missing with them now.

The pathological fixation on one thing is really really worrying. People will wake up eventually. I just wonder how long it'll take and how much we'll have lost by then.

I guarantee, in 2030 and beyond we'll still be reading articles examining why we all completely lost our minds and set our whole lives on fire believing it would save us.

Yes, like in china and new zealand where they now can live normal lives. Whereas we keep blundering on and on.

They're not living normal lives, especially not in New Zealand! Nobody can fly abroad, nobody can go and see their relatives in other countries, nobody can fly in to see family there.

Being confined to your island for the foreseeable future is not normal. The tourism industry in New Zealand and Australia is in absolute tatters. Hardly "normal" at all.

It's so annoying, isn't it. I think it feels worse when it's on Facebook, as it's like they're either proud of it, or they're completely oblivious.

One of my Facebook friends had a 1st birthday party for her 1yo and actually called the album 'Socially Distanced First Birthday Party'. There was nothing socially distanced about it! They were all holding the baby and hugging in different groups, sharing from the same buffet About 50 people there, so sod the 30 rule.. I don't know what planet people are on.

It's selfish because it passes on a virus that is killing thousands upon thousands of people. Restrictions won't last forever, we will get treatments and vaccines.

Yep, and if that vaccine comes after your 90 year old mum dies of cancer, it's not really going to be much of a comfort that you couldn't get to hug her and say goodbye.

Until then we need to look after the vulnerable In society who might DIE. You can't recover from death. You can never see someone again or cuddle them after they are dead and buried.

I'm so sick of hearing this. THERE ARE OTHER WAYS TO DIE THAT HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH COVID. Suicide. MH issues. Cancer. Strokes. Heart attacks. There have been numerous articles where people have been denied cancer treatment or long-term therapy or hospital visits because "COVID IS MORE IMPORTANT".

Why is COVID suddenly more important than all those other things?

Anyone that knows what they think is right needn't bother looking at this as it won't change anything for you.

For anyone who is vacillating, depending on who they have last read or listened to (or which thread on MN even) you might find this interesting. It's long but it is very relevant. It is neither denying the existence of Covid nor it's danger - just their thoughts and the reasons for them from 3 very experienced scientists involved in epidemiology from 3 different and well respected research universities who have got together. I found it thought provoking. You may or you may dismiss it, up to you.
Massachusetts, 4th October 2020
There is a summary underneath the video if you don't want to watch it.

@Oodlesofnoodles20

I will wear my mask, I will wash my hands, I will follow the one way systems and keep my distance. I won’t socialise Indoors with friends or colleagues and won’t go to busy places. That’s where it ends though. I will go and visit my Family. I will have family around to my house, in fact I’m having a BBQ on Saturday. I actually couldn’t give a shit what other people think about that.

Pretty much this.

I wash my hands, keep my distance from people. DH working at home, I'm working at home, we're not really seeing people inside.

But if Nicola Sturgeon thinks I'm going to cancel my holiday booked for next week if she ramps up restrictions in either where I live or where we're going, she's got another think coming. We're adults and can assess the risk for ourselves. And also agree with @Oodlesofnoodles20 that I don't really give a shit what people think any more.

@GregariousMountains

Nobody is going back to how they used to live, its not going to happen. War, plague and technological advancement are always the things that have fundamentally changed the way lives are lived. You might not like it but friends and extended family are going to be more of a virtual part of life now. Life has changed for good -what you consider normal human things are no longer normal human things. It sucks but you will get used to it.

We're all just Sims characters anyway.

@vanillandhoney

Yes, like in china and new zealand where they now can live normal lives. Whereas we keep blundering on and on.

They're not living normal lives, especially not in New Zealand! Nobody can fly abroad, nobody can go and see their relatives in other countries, nobody can fly in to see family there.

Being confined to your island for the foreseeable future is not normal. The tourism industry in New Zealand and Australia is in absolute tatters. Hardly "normal" at all.

Schools, most jobs and social lives are normal though. Isn't that more important than travelling?

Oh jog on I’ve never broken any rules. I risk my health everyday because the DfE have put all educational staff at risk. I will not judge other people. I know people who have been suicidal/committed suicide over this situation. People who have been diagnosed with terminal cancer and ‘can’t’ see their families. Two, parents in their 30’s.

Frankly your unnecessary rant comes across as irrational and a bit unhinged. Much like everyone else who has jumped into a dystopian mindset.

[quote TheDailyCarbuncle]@rorosemary do you seriously think being confined to your country, unable to travel, unable to have visitors or tourists from other countries, as the situation is in New Zealand, counts as a 'normal life'?[/quote]
Wouldn't you rather be confined to your country and live a normal life than all these lockdowns, schools closing, bubbles, social distancing et cetera?

My day-to-day life is more important to me than going abroad, and I live in the EU where going to another country used to be my shopping trip.

@StylishMummy - as long as you're ok OP, not a thought for anyone else. There is more risk but I won't bother to explain it to you because you know you're right. I hope you're teaching your children better values than you have.

These are not my words, I just read them the other day, but they seem quite pertinent - " You are being conditioned to view you freedom as selfish ".

Schools, most jobs and social lives are normal though. Isn't that more important than travelling?

Depends if you have family overseas that you can't see for the foreseeable future, I guess.

Not all foreign travel is for people to go and lie on a beach and get drunk.

@Dairyfine

These are not my words, I just read them the other day, but they seem quite pertinent - " You are being conditioned to view you freedom as selfish ".

Very apt.

No, @rorosemary I'd rather not be confined to my country and not be restricted from living my life.

I'm happy to take reasonable precautions such as washing hands, not going into large groups unless vital etc. But I am not willing to stop seeing my own family. That is a step too far and anyone who expects me to do that for their benefit can fuck off.

Anyone who'd like to sit on their high horse and explain to me how very very concerned they are about 'the vulnerable' can show me all the measures they've taken every other year of their lives for 'the vulnerable.' The vast majority of them will have not shown one iota of concern for 'the vulnerable' at any point in their lives. Fucking hypocrites. Also it's one type of 'vulnerable' people they're concerned about - those vulnerable to one particular virus. If you're vulnerable to anything else - other illnesses, especially mental illness, poverty, the effects of isolation, your vulnerability doesn't count. In fact how dare you talk about your vulnerability, you heartless idiot. You must suffer and accept it, because your suffering doesn't count.

You might not like it but friends and extended family are going to be more of a virtual part of life now.
Life has changed for good -what you consider normal human things are no longer normal human things. It sucks but you will get used to it.

Are you seriously suggesting that for the rest of my life, my DP is the only person I can hug and get closer than 2m to? That I am never going go be able to hug my best friend or my dad again? That I can never sit on the sofa next to relatives or friends ever again? That I can never sit round a dining table with anyone other than my DP? That I can never be a passenger in a friend's car? I am a rule follower and have been abiding by the rules so far, but I absolutely cannot do this forever. I hate it, and like the OP feel lonely and isolated.

I need to be able to do all of the things mentioned above. I need my normal life back. And I need to be able to do the things that bring me joy - go to concerts, listen to live music, go to sporting events.