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How can you do this to your children (and yourselves)?

983 replies

endoftheworldaoife · 13/09/2020 09:06

It has been six months and it's now very clear that covid won't be doing away in our lifetimes. A vaccine won't eradicate it (just as a vaccine didn't eradicate flu).

Most of you seem to be willing to accept social distancing and masks for the foreseeable. And I don't get it. We are a tribal species. We literally die without contact and get sick without communication. Kids are learning arrange, stilted ways of being that will just worsen their digital reliance. OCD is being normalised. Dating will be neurotic and masked. Freshers won't make new loves or lifelong friends like we did. As for their working lives...

I wouldn't mind catching covid (indeed I'm sure we all will sooner or later) so can someone explain to me what on earth is happening in their heads to tip the balance? If it only affected us, I could understand (well, I couldn't but this feels like child abuse on a giant scale).

OP posts:
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5
RingORingORoses · 13/09/2020 21:44

Lockdown this time could be tougher.... covid marshals in place, police being more active and an early half term,extended, 3-4 weeks instead of one

Can see flights grounded and Boris being more vocal. He needs to start looking for his backbone this thing isn’t going away

Parker231 · 13/09/2020 21:50

Why don’t you want to wear a face mask - it will protect others?

CoffeeandCroissant · 13/09/2020 21:52

@Flyonawalk

Puzzled, you are right. The number of UK people without an existing condition who died of covid up the the end of August is 1,390. And for this we have hampered education, destroyed businesses, compromised healthcare. I am not suggesting that covid victims with existing conditions did not matter, but surely this changes what the virus response should be from fit and well people. Wow.
That is a misunderstanding of the statistics, exactly the same claim was made about deaths in the US. Here is why it's incorrect: slate.com/technology/2020/09/94-percent-covid19-deaths-not-caused-by-something-else.html
EveryPlanetHasAYorkshire · 13/09/2020 21:52

@RingORingORoses

Lockdown this time could be tougher.... covid marshals in place, police being more active and an early half term,extended, 3-4 weeks instead of one

Can see flights grounded and Boris being more vocal. He needs to start looking for his backbone this thing isn’t going away

And the economy will be completley fucked.
Puzzledandpissedoff · 13/09/2020 21:53

Puzzled, this figure needs more media attention surely

I wouldn't disagree, but just how high do you suppose the chances are of it getting any, when there's more exciting doom and gloom to be had? After all, since when did most media - especially social media - favour a balanced approach over silly hyperbole?

Nobody pretends official figures tell the entire story, but I'm not sure what purpose is served through them going unreported

Parker231 · 13/09/2020 21:54

A friend shared this on Facebook earlier - makes a lot of sense

Why I am wearing a mask -
📷 I am educated enough to know that I could be asymptomatic and still give you the virus.
📷 No, I don’t “live in fear” of the virus; I just want to be part of the solution, not the problem.
📷 I don’t feel like the “government is controlling me” any more than when I wear a seat belt, don't drive drunk, obey the speed limit, or stop at a red light.
📷 The world doesn’t revolve around me. It’s not all about me and my comfort.
📷 If we all could follow these simple steps, the virus could be under control, and businesses back open.
📷 Wearing a mask doesn’t make me weak, scared, stupid, or even “controlled.” It makes me considerate.
📷 When you think about how you look, how uncomfortable it is, or what others think of you, just imagine someone close to you - a child, a father, a mother, aunt, uncle, or grandparent - choking on a respirator, alone without you or any family member allowed at bedside.

Wearing a mask is not political. It’s public health!

RingORingORoses · 13/09/2020 21:54

@EveryPlanetHasAYorkshire yes I believe so

But I think the gov are going to surprise us and make a move

SelkieQualia · 13/09/2020 21:55

Stop being so melodramatic. Given the progress of the UK vaccine, it's likely there will be widespread vaccine coverage within 12 months. And no, it won't eradicate coronavirus, but it will stop it ripping through the population and crashing the health system.

WouldBeGood · 13/09/2020 21:55

[quote Firstimer703]@DameFanny I've already stopped pretty much and yes, I will avoid anywhere I have to wear a face covering. [/quote]
Me too. Emergency supplies only.

RingORingORoses · 13/09/2020 21:56

I like that @Parker231

WouldBeGood · 13/09/2020 21:56

@Parker231

A friend shared this on Facebook earlier - makes a lot of sense

Why I am wearing a mask -
📷 I am educated enough to know that I could be asymptomatic and still give you the virus.
📷 No, I don’t “live in fear” of the virus; I just want to be part of the solution, not the problem.
📷 I don’t feel like the “government is controlling me” any more than when I wear a seat belt, don't drive drunk, obey the speed limit, or stop at a red light.
📷 The world doesn’t revolve around me. It’s not all about me and my comfort.
📷 If we all could follow these simple steps, the virus could be under control, and businesses back open.
📷 Wearing a mask doesn’t make me weak, scared, stupid, or even “controlled.” It makes me considerate.
📷 When you think about how you look, how uncomfortable it is, or what others think of you, just imagine someone close to you - a child, a father, a mother, aunt, uncle, or grandparent - choking on a respirator, alone without you or any family member allowed at bedside.

Wearing a mask is not political. It’s public health!

This is a massive load of annoying pish
Parker231 · 13/09/2020 21:58

@WouldBeGood - why ? I hadn’t realised so many posters were so selfish of the lives of others.

RingORingORoses · 13/09/2020 21:58

@SelkieQualia was reading about ‘issues’ with this vaccine. It’s apparently rushed so there’s disclaimers with it.

WouldBeGood · 13/09/2020 21:59

[quote Parker231]@WouldBeGood - why ? I hadn’t realised so many posters were so selfish of the lives of others.[/quote]
Because it’s inane maudlin drivel

sunglassesonthetable · 13/09/2020 22:01

Firstimer703
@DameFanny I've already stopped pretty much and yes, I will avoid anywhere I have to wear a face covering.

Me too. Emergency supplies only.*

do you not wear a mask for medical reasons?
@WouldBeGood ?

stayathomer · 13/09/2020 22:02

OP I had covid and weeks later I'm still struggling with chest pains and breathlessness. Before it I was perfectly healthy. My dh and kids had to stay away from me for 2 weeks and get 2 tests. Aside from that I dont think you give kids enough credit. They adapt to situations. They dont have to wear masks often but when they do it's like if I was telling them to put a woolly hat on etc, it's literally like 'we all got our masks?' Maybe we're lucky but they aren't phased by the extra things that have to be done now, they're just annoyed at things like soft play being closed. As for the wearing of a mask, I'm a spluttery laugher and talker so I know I'm helping people by wearing the mask as if I had anything at all there's a chance I'd spread it!! As for you saying you're willing to get covid, please dont say that, covid has ruined things for me. I used to be outdoorsy and play football and chasing with the kids, I used to do pe with joe and go running, now I can literally walk to the washing line, put something in the bin and sweep up and then I have to sit or even lie down.

MadameBlobby · 13/09/2020 22:03

I agree @WouldBeGood. I have rolled my eyes so far they’ve stuck to the back of my head when I’ve seen that rubbish posted. I don’t know why people have to make such a pantomime out of something we all have to do anyway.

It’s shite anyway. Everyone is wearing masks here and our cases are still going up, so it’s clear it’s going to take more than that to bring it under control.

WouldBeGood · 13/09/2020 22:03

@sunglassesonthetable

*Firstimer703 *@DameFanny* I've already stopped pretty much and yes, I will avoid anywhere I have to wear a face covering. * Me too. Emergency supplies only.*

do you not wear a mask for medical reasons?
@WouldBeGood ?

I didn’t say I didn’t wear one. I said I avoided places it is mandatory.
Flyonawalk · 13/09/2020 22:05

Coffee, I don’t think it is a misunderstanding of the statistics. Rather an understanding of them in context. The Slate article is highly emotive and stresses why each life mattered, regardless of health conditions. Of course it did. But we need to hear a realistic assessment of risk for those lucky enough to be relatively young and healthy. In order for healthcare, education and business to be allowed to function, for all our sakes.

SwimSwim · 13/09/2020 22:10

I couldn't agree more OP. Really good post and points!

BogRollBOGOF · 13/09/2020 22:12

I, like every human being will die. For me, I hope I make it many more decades to old age first. But I am not invincible. I would loathe to spend my final years being lonely, dependent, understimulated and possibly forgetting who I am and what is important to me. There is living, and there is existing and death comes to us all.
I don't have to worry about my dad in his 80s... because he died suddenly in his early 50s.
I don't have to worry about my uncle in a carehome because he died an old man, unable to enjoy life anymore at 48. It was worse seeing him slumped in a chair, looking pained and disconnected at his final Christmas than it was the next and final time I saw him in ITU when in a sedated state, he looked at peace for the first time in years. I hope his friends still in the care home are having stimulating activities and full human faces connecting with them. They reach old age and decline so quickly and easily.

Death is not always a tragedy. Sometimes it is a release.

I realised the value quality of life at 11, a few months after the police car pulled up outside our house break the news about my dad.

For my children, my priority has been to keep life stimulating, active and as sociable as possible. DS1has ASD. Social distancing from strangers is pretty natural to him, but I have not enforced it with other children. It has taken years to learn how to play with his peers and I have not been prepared to risk his development and long term social skills with a temporary set of rules of limited benefit to his age group.
He has been asked to mask up only the once for a medical appointment. It's a rule for grown-ups. (He knows alcohol is only for grown-ups too)
He could ill afford losing half a school year between ASD, dyslexia and dyspraxia. ASD means that he did not accept my role as his teacher, even though he remembers the days when I had my own, real classroom.
It's significantly delayed getting an EHCP.
I can't in y5 visit secondaries so I have a clear idea of what schools are appropriate for him in 13m when I fill the forms in. There is potentially a lot at stake in the wrong school with no EHCP...

I am not going to let the "rule of six" indefinitely
deprive him of his second close friend. We meet as two familes of 4, in low risk places like parks and woods. The children run off and the whole arrangement is far lower risk than meeting 5 friends at the pub. He already spent far too long deprived of him.

Strict, unquestioning obdedience to bad, illogical rules will have long term consequences to mental and physical health, the economy and life opportunities across society. Young and old.

More children have died from suicide or murder by their family than from Covid 19. The toll of children damaged by abuse or crime/ gangs/ drugs will take years to fully emerge.

Are the costs really worth the benefits?
Human lives are not disposable, but they are finite.

BogRollBOGOF · 13/09/2020 22:18

Let's hope the Covid 19 vaccine is more effective than the flu vaccines. Get the wrong flu strain and 50,000 can die (2018). No body blinked at that. We didn't close the schools, shut down business and reduce the NHS to an empty shell and let people with any other health condition prolong their suffering. Broadly the same high risk demographic (elderly, imunocompromised, respiritory difficulties...)

Pixxie7 · 13/09/2020 22:22

A bit extreme regarding child abuse, everybody is suffering in one way or another. It’s not abuse it’s life a big difference.

Croleeen · 13/09/2020 22:25

I'm a single mum, the Dad is overseas. Got made redundant in February. No family able/willing to help. Having my kids home during lockdown meant I couldn't work or find a new job. So no, for me a return to virtual lessons would be a disaster and might mean I lose my home.

Pixxie7 · 13/09/2020 22:33

SelkieQualia@ all pharmaceutical trials have to carry a disclaimer.