Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Covid

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

How are people so calm about Covid?

417 replies

BumbleWumble · 04/07/2020 05:16

I have written several posts now and been told my reaction is not normal and that I need help for my mental health as I am suffering from health anxiety.

But how do you come to terms with coexisting with this disease, possibly forever if no vaccine is found? A highly contagious disease that you run the risk of catching everywhere you go and might kill you. Even if it doesn't you might be left with severe incapacitating organ damage. Or you might get the long haul version that goes on for months at least. Since the disease is so new no one actually knows if people with this form actually ever get better.

This doesn't seem an equivalent risk to say driving a car. It seems that eventually most people will contract it. True, many people would have a mild version then recover, although even the mild version is supposed to be a nasty experience. But a vast number of people would either die, be left with terrible lasting damage or be ill for months, possibly permanently. Also it's not known whether lasting immunity is conferred, so you might initially get a mild version then get a more severe version at a later date. And as well as this, there is the constant fear of loved ones getting it and that you might pass it on to them. Or that you might unknowingly infect any one.

In addition to this, our quality of life will be awful. As well as the threat of the actual virus constantly hanging over us, social distancing will remain necessary and we will never be able to freely interact with other people ever again. People will not be able to be close with family and friends. There will be no proper socialising, no events where people gather. There will be fear every time an indoor space has to be shared with others. Indoor workplaces especially will be a major risk forever more. As will public transport.

We will just lead a terribly bleak existence knowing that at some point we will likely catch the disease regardless with a relatively high chance of a terrible outcome. Or if not us then a loved one.

I don't understand how people aren't more concerned about this and put it on a par with other daily risks such as driving a car. It is so terrible the whole world has come to a halt over it, and if no vaccine is found quickly, is going to have a catastrophic impact on humanity as a whole as far as I can see.

I realise there will be no choice but to get on with life, but I do not know how to do this without an ever present sense of anxiety and dread. I can think of little else and if this is to be the future then I fear the rest of my life consisting of terrible fear waiting for it to get me and loved ones.

I feel utter despair and terror. It's like a nightmare with no end.

OP posts:
randomer · 06/07/2020 07:46

Were you this worried about things pre Covid OP? Is this just a peg for you to hang your anxiety on?

Its a very difficult situation for sure.

CloudsCanLookLikeSheep · 06/07/2020 08:00

Ive had two non covid related life threatening illnesses this year which came out of the blue and couldn't have been anticipated. Luckily both times a trip to A and E and a few days in hospital sorted me out but the second time I was very seriously ill for a short time and would have definitely died without medical care.

Made me realise that you don't know what's round the fucking corner so live your life free of fear.

Wolfiefan · 06/07/2020 08:19

Please OP seek help. It’s normal to feel some anxiety around what’s happening. It’s normal to feel low and sad about things you’re missing out on. But you seem completely consumed by being anxious and obsessing about the virus.
Yours isn’t a “normal” response.
Stop seeking out news and info to feed your anxiety and contact your GP today.

BumbleWumble · 06/07/2020 11:18

@Wolfiefan

Please OP seek help. It’s normal to feel some anxiety around what’s happening. It’s normal to feel low and sad about things you’re missing out on. But you seem completely consumed by being anxious and obsessing about the virus. Yours isn’t a “normal” response. Stop seeking out news and info to feed your anxiety and contact your GP today.
I have contacted my GP and been prescribed anti anxiety medication and also speak to a counsellor.

That is what it is like, feeling consumed by it. My mind feels gripped by the whole thing and I have not been able to truly relax and switch off from it since I understood what was happening in March.

I feel a sense of derealisation in that even though the world looks the same, my perception of it is very different and it scares me as it feels so alien like having stepped into a parallel universe. Or trapped in a nightmare I can't make myself wake up from.

I can barely remember myself before this happened and I certainly can't seem to access the old me. There's a constant sense of disorientation which is also frightening.

I don't know what will happen if I catch the virus and become ill, as I am already mentally exhausted. Would the anxiety increase or decrease as I would then be physically exhausted? I guess my chances of surviving it are diminished due to this constant heightened stress level. I just can't seem to snap out of it though.

I'm not sure why I have had this extreme reaction when others appear not to have. It is mainly about the virus itself, but all the changes to the world and the concept of the 'New Normal' also feed into the sense of dread and disorientation.

OP posts:
vodkaredbullgirl · 06/07/2020 11:52

When did you last talk to your gp? maybe the meds you are on are not suitable for you. My dd has had to have her meds dose doubled, it has help here and her anxiety.

XDownwiththissortofthingX · 06/07/2020 11:56

at OP

It's just another among a countless number of things in life that could potentially kill me.

I don't have the time or the brainspace to constantly fret about every single one of them, so I'm not spending any more time contemplating Covid than is necessary.

I have no fear of death at all, so while I take precautions like mask-wearing etc, I'm also of the pragmatic mind that if I catch it, I catch it, and if it kills me, it kills me. I could get squashed by a bus tomorrow, develop an incurable cancer, fall off a stepladder changing a lightbulb and break my neck. I don't spend a single second of my life fretting about any of those things, so why would, indeed should, Covid be any different?

Oxyiz · 06/07/2020 12:00

Brilliant OP - please be aware that anxiety medication can temporarily make anxiety worse before settling it down. This is normal, temporary and in most cases its followed by lowered anxiety in the long run. What medication have they prescribed for you?

ravenmum · 06/07/2020 12:12

As I understand it, ths anxiety medication is something that OP has not started since beginning this thread; she mentioned it earlier.
But you're right, Oxyiz, that if she has only just started on it, it may not have started to have the necessary effect yet.

What you're describing, Bumble, with not being able to remember what you were like before, is absolutely typical when you have anxiety/depression. When you are on the right medication and it is working properly, you also won't be able to relate to anxious you any more. I remember this effect well from when I was depressed and anxious.

Please do also remember that alongside the medication and counselling, you also need to adopt a mentally healthy lifestyle so that you are not putting your leg in plaster but then going out and running a marathon. For example, I would recommend getting a free browser extension or piece of software that blocks internet use, or the use of certain sites, within times that you set yourself. This is useful as an additional barrier to help stop yourself from constantly going back to the same subject/starting a new thread every day of the week.

ravenmum · 06/07/2020 12:28

A couple of ideas to start researching on how you can encourage better mental health in other ways:
Overview:
www.rcn.org.uk/get-help/member-support-services/counselling-service/covid-19-and-your-mental-wellbeing
Cafés like this (check if there is one locally):
www.eastlondonadvertiser.co.uk/news/health/together-cafe-opens-in-tower-hamlets-1-6663663

Wolfiefan · 06/07/2020 13:08

@BumbleWumble I feel for you. I really do. It can feel like there is nothing left for you to feel but stomach clenching and heart stopping anxiety.
But there is.
You may not be able to see it but how you feel now is temporary. You can’t simply snap out of it but professional support and the right medication can make it feel like you’re you again. Like the world hasn’t shifted on its axis and no one else can see it.
Yes. These are worrying times.
But it can and will get better. Worth speaking to your GP again? Medication can take a while to work bit if it isn’t then a change might be in order.
Step away from anything that will fuel the anxiety. (News!)
Mindfulness, some exercise, distraction? Worth a try.

BumbleWumble · 06/07/2020 15:03

@Oxyiz

Brilliant OP - please be aware that anxiety medication can temporarily make anxiety worse before settling it down. This is normal, temporary and in most cases its followed by lowered anxiety in the long run. What medication have they prescribed for you?
Propranalol as well as a couple of courses of Valium. The Valium of course will not continue. I have also been prescribed Sertraline, but after taking one felt absolutely unbearably anxious. It is my understanding it can get worse before getting better, but that could take 6 weeks. I decided I could not risk feeling even worse for 6 weeks.
OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 06/07/2020 15:08

If you’ve been prescribed it and not taken it @BumbleWumble then you MUST contact your GP. ASAP. There are alternatives b

Pikachubaby · 06/07/2020 15:18

Hope you sort it out with the meds OP

Your facts are not even right, it’s not THAT contagious, yes it is more contagious than other colds and flus, but on average only 2 people are infected by a Covid carrier. Only 1 in 1700 have it.

It does not spread as easily as the government led us to believe (they had to frighten us into compliance) and is not as dangerous

Personally, I am not even worried about catching it.

randomer · 06/07/2020 17:00

Please dear OP, in the nicest possible way, do what you are told by the GP. Never mind the self diagnosis and Dr Google and MN.

Orangeblossom78 · 06/07/2020 17:18

OP I saw another poster saying the same about sertraline. It has a short half life which means it works quite rapidly - there are others such as fluoxetine which has a longer half life or mirtazapine which is a bit more sedating and less stimulating- what I am saying is others might help you if that one doesn't

i have been a bit like you as well, my Dh has health issues and I've been struggling a bit with the changes, DC at home, him going back to work, helping them with GCSEs, I have started taking fluoxetine again about a week ago and just in the last couple of days feel a bit more positive and things feel a bit less awful. Flowers for you

Orangeblossom78 · 06/07/2020 17:20

I also try and remember the majority of people have this mildly, 80% I think. there is a clip of a lady who explains her recovery it might help you (or not, is from South Korea so quite medical) but just thought it may as the lady is also South asian so you could see she was OK

www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/world-asia-51714162/how-i-recovered-from-coronavirus-and-isolation

randomer · 06/07/2020 17:23

please be aware that anxiety medication can temporarily make anxiety worse before settling it down.

Are you a doctor? Would you be quite so gung ho offering advice to a diabetic about insulin?

Orangeblossom78 · 06/07/2020 17:24

I think her message about fear at the end is quite useful.

Orangeblossom78 · 06/07/2020 17:25

please be aware that anxiety medication can temporarily make anxiety worse before settling it down

Yes this is true of SSRIs and most people who have taken them will recognise it and have been told about it by their doctors

Orangeblossom78 · 06/07/2020 17:27

"Most people will only experience a few mild side effects when taking SSRIs. These can be troublesome at first, but they'll generally improve with time.

Common side effects of SSRIs can include:

feeling agitated, shaky or anxious"

www.nhs.uk/conditions/ssri-antidepressants/

Keynote1 · 06/07/2020 17:31

I was anxious at the start of this to a very high level. After a couple of weeks I spoke to the Dr and was prescribed a low dose of Sertraline, it did take a few weeks to have maximum effect but I did start to feel gradually better after a couple of weeks. I really think you should contact your GP, they may advise you to give the medication longer or change to something else. I had Propranalol at first but that controls physical symptoms not the distressing thoughts . Really would advise contacting your GP asap, they are speaking to loads of people with this issue right now and I am sure they would help.

ravenmum · 06/07/2020 17:31

Speak to your doctor again. You have been prescribed two different things for a reason. I would guess that the Valium is supposed to help you get through the first few weeks with the Sertraline. But it is the Sertraline that will be doing the real job when it comes down to it and stopping the anxiety in the long run.
Yes, it can take a few weeks for the SSRI to settle, but it doesn't have to, and it is unlikely that you would be feeling worse for a whole 6 weeks. I never even noticed an effect. Speak to your GP again, as you can see that your current choices are not working.

Oxyiz · 06/07/2020 18:14

No @randomer I'm not a doctor, just someone who's tried many anxiety pills over time.

OP, isn't it worth feeling potentially worse for a week or two, and then better for all the following weeks?

Gwenhwyfar · 06/07/2020 18:16

"the majority of people have this mildly, 80%"

Anyone not hospitalised is considered have a 'mild' case. Might not be what we normally mean by mild.

Gwenhwyfar · 06/07/2020 18:18

"on average only 2 people are infected by a Covid carrier."

In that in lockdown though? I read that, in normal circumstances, it would be 3 as opposed to 1 for flu.