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Covid

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How are people so calm about Covid?

417 replies

BumbleWumble · 04/07/2020 05:16

I have written several posts now and been told my reaction is not normal and that I need help for my mental health as I am suffering from health anxiety.

But how do you come to terms with coexisting with this disease, possibly forever if no vaccine is found? A highly contagious disease that you run the risk of catching everywhere you go and might kill you. Even if it doesn't you might be left with severe incapacitating organ damage. Or you might get the long haul version that goes on for months at least. Since the disease is so new no one actually knows if people with this form actually ever get better.

This doesn't seem an equivalent risk to say driving a car. It seems that eventually most people will contract it. True, many people would have a mild version then recover, although even the mild version is supposed to be a nasty experience. But a vast number of people would either die, be left with terrible lasting damage or be ill for months, possibly permanently. Also it's not known whether lasting immunity is conferred, so you might initially get a mild version then get a more severe version at a later date. And as well as this, there is the constant fear of loved ones getting it and that you might pass it on to them. Or that you might unknowingly infect any one.

In addition to this, our quality of life will be awful. As well as the threat of the actual virus constantly hanging over us, social distancing will remain necessary and we will never be able to freely interact with other people ever again. People will not be able to be close with family and friends. There will be no proper socialising, no events where people gather. There will be fear every time an indoor space has to be shared with others. Indoor workplaces especially will be a major risk forever more. As will public transport.

We will just lead a terribly bleak existence knowing that at some point we will likely catch the disease regardless with a relatively high chance of a terrible outcome. Or if not us then a loved one.

I don't understand how people aren't more concerned about this and put it on a par with other daily risks such as driving a car. It is so terrible the whole world has come to a halt over it, and if no vaccine is found quickly, is going to have a catastrophic impact on humanity as a whole as far as I can see.

I realise there will be no choice but to get on with life, but I do not know how to do this without an ever present sense of anxiety and dread. I can think of little else and if this is to be the future then I fear the rest of my life consisting of terrible fear waiting for it to get me and loved ones.

I feel utter despair and terror. It's like a nightmare with no end.

OP posts:
GracieLane · 04/07/2020 14:52

Initially I was really scared. It was a new thing to worry about. But now I have managed to get it into my peripheral health anxieties and out of my constant sight of vision IYSWIM? So like driving a car, I am aware of it. I check my mirrors regularly to keep the risk down, but I mostly concentrate on the road ahead. Likely thing is I won't see my death coming. Like a sink hole in the road, one day l'll just be driving along, checking my health is managed, watching for any hazards, and just like that I'll fall to my death when I least expect it 🤷🏻‍♀️

GracieLane · 04/07/2020 14:59

Also I only read the news that is relevant to me. I no longer watch it on TV and that has helped

EnthusiasmIsDisturbed · 04/07/2020 14:59

Probably because I couldn’t hide from it I had to work and I was in contact with people that had it

I’m far more relaxed about it than those I know who stayed at home throughout lockdown

The first few weeks I was very anxious but i couldn’t function like that for too long my anxiety burned itself out and reality took over home life and work had to coexist it’s as simple as that

I’m stressed over schooling and saddened I don’t get to see family because of travel restrictions but hopefully next year we shall be able to but we adapt because we have to

katkit · 04/07/2020 15:09

You sound annoyed that some people’s worry levels aren’t off the scale. Worrying won’t protect you, or anyone.

abitoflight · 04/07/2020 15:26

I heard on the radio about psychological responses to pandemics
I went from a 'monitor' to a 'blunter' virtually overnight
A monitor watches all the news, searches for info etc. The price of this is increased anxiety but a reduced chance of infection. A blunter does not follow news, maybe less aware of guidance and precautions but has less anxiety with an increased risk of infection. That was the theory.
I doubt it really as clear cut irl
I was so anxious at the beginning- I was glad to get into work as it reduced my anxiety - probably as I got away from rolling corona news. No corona anxiety now tho as I've consciously switched off. I wash my hands, stand in queues nicely etc but me worrying won't help me or anyone else

randomer · 04/07/2020 15:35

Its all very well to say " there is no point in worrying". A case of stating the obvious , if I ever heard it.

We know this but some of us are programmed that way.

Gwenhwyfar · 04/07/2020 15:37

"Worrying won’t protect you, or anyone."

It would be helpful if some people worried more - those people who haven't changed their behaviour at all, come too close to everyone else, don't give you space on the pavement, let their dogs run up to others, let their children touch everything. If they worried more, that would protect others.

GabriellaMontez · 04/07/2020 16:16

I dont know how you are living in such a state. I suggest if going for a walk helps, you double your exercise.

See the Gp again.

Stop watching the news.

How are you getting to work? Shopping?

I was in a group of 300 tested for a research project. 2 Asian nurses were amongst those who tested positive for antibodies. They didn't even know they'd had it. You wont see this in the papers. It doesnt sell.

I have several friends who have had mild cases and are now fully recovered and back at work.

Of these none of their families caught it. Or if they did they were asymptomatic.

You wont read their stories online or anywhere. Theres nothing to tell.

You sound at more risk from stress.

cologne4711 · 04/07/2020 16:32

It would be helpful if some people worried more - those people who haven't changed their behaviour at all, come too close to everyone else, don't give you space on the pavement, let their dogs run up to others, let their children touch everything. If they worried more, that would protect others

I agree in terms of annoying behaviour, but actually none of those things are going to spread the virus.

cologne4711 · 04/07/2020 16:37

this virus is so horribly contagious and so awful

This just isn't true. It is not "horribly contagious" (step away from that Facebook meme making it out to be like a radioactive miasma in the air!) and it is only "so awful" in a minority of cases.

cologne4711 · 04/07/2020 16:38

I haven't been shopping, to the beach, to the local beauty spots since lockdown began as as far as I'm concerned I'd receive an automatic death sentence (obese but I'm in my early 20s

If the obese bit is true, then there's an easy solution. Get out, go for walks, eat less and lose weight. Every lb you lose will make you less susceptible to bad side effects from the virus.

WhereILiveIsWhereIStay · 04/07/2020 16:57

@Gwenhwyfar

See, this is the problem. Completely normal behaviour (though annoying) and people like you thinking that's putting them at risk.

It isn't.

Your risk of contracting CV from someone passing you outside at less than 2m, contracting it from a dog approaching you or a child touching things is so, so remote.

But you see people doing this as a 'threat' to you and you want them to worry more.

There's no reason to. People shouldn't be worrying about what you said.

Don't project your irrational anxiety onto others.

lilgreen · 04/07/2020 16:58

Played tennis this morning with my DH.Courts were full. Gelled hands on way in, way out. Went food shopping, cleaned trolley, gelled hands etc. Basically normal life with extra precautions.

dobbyssoc · 04/07/2020 16:59

@cologne4711 I have lost 1 stone in the last month. I've got an exercise bike and treadmill in the house. I've tried really hard but I can't loose all that weight that quickly!

labyrinthloafer · 04/07/2020 17:32

@randomer

Its all very well to say " there is no point in worrying". A case of stating the obvious , if I ever heard it.

We know this but some of us are programmed that way.

Yes to this.

It reminds of when a woman suffering with anorexia went on Richard and Judy, and richard said ' why don't you just eat something'...

Why don't you just stop worrying OP is along the same lines.

Lessofallthisunpleasantness · 04/07/2020 17:37

Every day is a day closer to death anyway.

We are bored of being cowards.

You have to die of something.

Covid is so boring. Life is boring with everyone scared of Covid. Lets just gradually all get it.

We live with other diseases amongst us that you can catch and die of at any time.

Alex50 · 04/07/2020 18:06

I went to the local pub this afternoon, there were only a few people in there. I throughly enjoyed it. I went shopping with my daughter on Thursday, again a nice experience as hardly anyone about. Life has to carry on. I’m 50, probably more at risk than op. What’s the point of living if all you think about is dying?

Orangeblossom78 · 04/07/2020 18:12

It may also help to know that the government were advised by a team of psychologists that to comply with lockdown people needed to 'feel there was a personal threat' hence the dramatic messaging - I wonder if this was also emphasised by the BBC as getting the message across as their info has been very much along those lines as well

Understanding this helped me get things in proportion.

Other countries however have not followed this approach simply asking people to be sensible

Msmcc1212 · 04/07/2020 18:19

m.youtube.com/watch?v=BmvNCdpHUYM

Watch this OP. Do what you can to minimise your chances (2m distance, wash hands for 20 secs, disinfect shopping or leave it for 3 days etc, follow any other guidelines that come out) and then live according to what matters most to you. When you get to the end of your life do you want to look back on a life lived in fear or a life lived well despite what was happening. Good luck.

PuzzledObserver · 04/07/2020 18:42

This is the first time in human history, as far as I know, that life has been put on hold to try to prevent illness and death.

It isn’t. I read Daniel Defoe’s Journal of the Plague Year. It talks about houses being shut up once people were diagnosed, businesses shutting and people being thrown out of work, the rich fleeing to their second homes in the country, the poor taking on the dangerous work of burying bodies because they were desperate to earn money, of outsiders who were trying to flee the plague being banned from entering towns and villages even to buy supplies, shortages of many supplies etc, and a massive effort to provide relief to the needy. Just as now, there were numerous unsubstantiated claims of things which would prevent you catching plague or cure it if you caught it.

This is what human beings do in the midst of new and unknown threats. What PP’s have said about the risk of other things which you do every day are basically true - but because this is new, it is setting off all the alarm bells.

OP - science is learning more every day about how to prevent, treat and control this virus. One day it won’t be new any more, and the relative risk to your health and life which it presents will be much less than it is now. But even as it is now, your anxiety is magnifying it in a way which is harming your wellbeing. Please take the advice offered and speak to your GP.

I’ve been on antidepressants since last September and did a CBT course before Christmas. Both have helped massively with my anxiety.

Quartz2208 · 04/07/2020 19:42

In addition to this, our quality of life will be awful. As well as the threat of the actual virus constantly hanging over us, social distancing will remain necessary and we will never be able to freely interact with other people ever again. People will not be able to be close with family and friends. There will be no proper socialising, no events where people gather. There will be fear every time an indoor space has to be shared with others. Indoor workplaces especially will be a major risk forever more. As will public transport.

Having seen how my area is with opening up this is definitely not even true now. Or the news.

Hairdressors/pubs/coffee shops/restaurants all had people

You seem OP to want everyone to feel like you and I cant understand why?

BeijingBikini · 04/07/2020 20:06

I honestly just can't bring myself to be scared or even that bothered about covid, if anything I'm just fed up and waiting to get my life back. I'm normally a very anxious person but not about illnesses - I never get ill and put that down to being so lax about hygiene. I never change the blue cloth in the kitchen, don't clean loads, I go to London and touch the escalator handrails then eat crisps and lick my fingers. So why would I worry about some illness that is basically just a cold for most people? Up to 80% are asymptomatic and the death rate was completely overblown by an incompetent professor who's overblown EVERY epidemic prediction he's ever worked on. It's really not as bad as it was made out to be, and ANY virus can have lifelong side effects or kill you if you are already very poorly.

I'd rather enjoy my life than elongate it but be miserable.

R0bb1ns20 · 04/07/2020 23:21

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

R0bb1ns20 · 04/07/2020 23:22

What we are being put through with the virus response is a near perfect parallel to the Amnesty International definition of torture & Biderman's ‘Chart of Coercion.’

Gwenhwyfar · 05/07/2020 00:14

"Your risk of contracting CV from someone passing you outside at less than 2m, contracting it from a dog approaching you or a child touching things is so, so remote.

But you see people doing this as a 'threat' to you and you want them to worry more.

There's no reason to. People shouldn't be worrying about what you said.

Don't project your irrational anxiety onto others."

My friend caught it from the supermarket in my city. He had been nowhere else so he knows he got it there. He was not in prolonged or close contact with anyone and sanitising his hands, but still he got it from fleetingly passing someone in the supermarket so I KNOW that's possible for me to. Not irrational.

Whether you think the risk is high or not, people should be observing social distance anyway.