Employer wants me to WFH looking after 1 yr old FT?

[PopandFizz]

Hi,
I'm due to return from maternity in September and had a catch up call with my boss last week and he said that we will all be WFH for the rest of the year to ensure employee safety. Fair does.
But then when I said I dont think I can get a nursery place there is no provision for this. Simply that I'll have to look after my 1 year old whilst WFH. My job is very detail based and I'm baffled at how he thinks this is an option.
Am I naive from being on mat leave to think this is wrong? Is this what people are doing?

Why don't you think you'll be able to get a nursery place? Nurseries are reopening from this week. What had you planned to do if it wasn't WFH?

What exactly do you think the rest of us have been doing the last couple of months? I am home schooling 3 dc while dh and I work full time - dh from home and me mixing it with going into work. High pressure jobs. It’s really hard but every parent in the country is doing this right now.

What childcare would you have used if working from the office?

Of course it’s absolutely impossible. Unless you have a partner who also works from home and you can work around each other, but then you destroy any semblance of family life and your mental health takes a beating.

Is he one of those who thinks ‘can’t he/she just stay and play quietly in the playpen for an hour?’

But weren't you already going to return in Sept? I am due to (although have pushed it back for various reasons). It we've had a nursery place organised for DS from September for a couple of months now. What were you planning to do when you go back to work?

There isn't really any other option right now unless childcare is safe to open. You could ask about taking unpaid leave or annual leave but furlough is stopping next week for anyone who hasn't already been furloughed

Why do you think your childcare is your work’s problem to solve? September is quite some time away and quite a lot of parents are in exactly the situation you describe, working from home with young children is busy professional jobs.

What did you think was going to happen? Either you’d be going back to the office and need childcare or you’d be wfh in which case presumably you just utilise the same childcare option?

What would your plan have been in September if the role was office based?

Nurseries are reopening now. Childminders are open now.

I mean, yeah, it's what people have been doing and it's been pretty shit - but I'm a bit confused as to why you think you'll still need to do this in September? Surely you can sort childcare between now and then?

I also don't really understand why this has only become apparent now - it sounds like until this call you thought you'd be going back into work, so definitely would have needed childcare. What's changed? Surely you didn't really think that you'd say you couldn't get childcare and they'd say 'ah well, don't worry about working, then?'

Nurseries aren’t reopening everywhere.

Yes it is what people are doing OP, but it’s really horrible. Get a nursery place of you can and if you can use leave to hold off returning until that starts then do it.

I know people doing high pressure jobs to strict time deadlines through the day, with babies strapped into prams next to the desk, and toddlers at their feet.

Saying that, I hope by September nurseries will be operating more or less at usual capacity. Book a place now.

Yeah this is completely normal right now. It isnt ideal.

Also surely you had arranged a nursery place prior to covid?

what do you want them to suggest?
It's just what a huge number of us have been doing since March.

Do you mean the childcare you had planned precovid is not opening in September? I guess you’d need to look for alternative otherwise, as others have said, you have to do a care and work balancing act. It’s a nightmare.

Most nurseries I know of will be opening again though.

The nursery we had arranged a place with have closed down and others in the area are not taking anyone else on for the time being as they are organising the bubble groups to lower risk. Also both our parents were going to do a day each but are both in the high risk category so cant look after her as she has regular hospital appointments.

From talking to friends their employers are accepting lower work hours or have furloughed them. My boss is a real pain when it comes to performance management and I just know hes going to try and have me over a barrel on my output when I'm trying to juggle both.
She is almost 9 months now and I cant even make a cup of tea without hell breaking loose in the next room.

Why can't you get a nursery place?

Can you ask for part time hours or unpaid leave? I don't know what else your employer can do tbh.

Yes, several of my friends are working from home while also looking after their toddlers. Not ideal but they're just having to manage: starting very early while Dad looks after baby (one friend is starting at 6am and works solidly till midday, for example, and then swaps with her husband) using nap times, letting them play independently while getting bits done, etc.

By September I would have thought there would be nursery or childminder options though.

You can put in a request to reduce your hours or some other form of flexible working (ie when your OH is home to watch the baby etc)

Have you looked at childminders?

Unfortunately I don't see there is much that can be done. They aren't going to pay you to sit at home doing nothing and the furlough scheme will have ended by then. It sucks but realistically you either work or don't.

I'd try some childminders in your area to see if they have space or some nurseries slightly further away?

Yes, this is what people are (attempting to) do. It’s really difficult. I’ve limited through on a combination of annual leave, unpaid leave etc. Our nursery only reopened w limited numbers and haven’t given us our place back. I anticipate that being the case for some months. No holiday cover for school hols either. This resigning seems about the only option for me right now. Hope it doesnt come to that for you.

How far away is your work? I know you font have to go to the office in September now, but I wonder if it was some distance away that you could look at nurseries in that area.

What’s your partners situation?