I think I was naive.

[Gatorgator]

In my head - when this started - twelve weeks was worst case scenario. I knew the virus wouldn’t go away obviously, but I thought after twelve weeks the nhs would be better prepared, we’d know more about the virus and there would be a degree of acceptance that we just have to live alongside it and know there’s an elevated risk. I’m in an at risk category so I’m not just dismissing this risk.
However instead it seems that we are going to live like this indefinitely. I didn’t think theatres, sporting events etc would be open for a long time, nor did I think the travel industry would pick back up, but I did think I’d be able to visit my elderly parents who live two miles down the road.

Now it seems like this is the new normal. All meetings are going to be virtual. We are having (unsuccessful) virtual play dates with other children. The few friends I’m still communicating with I’m mainly messaging but really - if I’m never seeing them again then what’s the point?

There are a couple of big Christmas things nearby that are annual events and they are cancelled. More and more I’m coming to realise that this is it. This is in fact the new normal everyone keeps talking about. Only seeing the people you live with and being terrified to even leave the house to collect something essential like a prescription.

I feel like we are living in hell and I am becoming so depressed. I have been shielding since February and my husband has to work every hour of the day including weekends and is so stressed. I feel so utterly alone.
He is a key worker in an area related to child protection and so we know far too much about horrible cases of suffering due to the schools not being open. We live in a small flat, so I can’t help but overhear some of his meetings and they make me cry. Then I go online for some sort of contact and see everyone hating the public sector workers and people here saying they are heartless evil people who just want to experiment on kids!

So many people are suffering so much and I just don’t see anyway out of this. If we don’t find a vaccine soon, there will be so many more deaths. We are just getting started. It is still looking like there is a good chance the IFR is around 1%, so without a vaccine it isn’t unrealistic to imagine 0.5% of the world could die before this is over. I feel so lost and without hope and I just want to see my family so much.

I just don't get why the easing of the restrictions was timed to take effect this week. I don't get how they say we are still on level 4 of Boris' new chart, and moving to level 3. Haven't we just scuppered any chance of getting to level 3 now, by all the more people who are out and about?

I agree we need to loosen restrictions, and get people to work, of course I do, but I think we locked down a week too late, and have eased restrictions two weeks too early - I think numbers will rise because of this, we'll be above 1 by the end of the month, and that will push the dates back for opening schools and some retail.

I would have preferred to see a further decline in the R number, a further drop in transmissions and Matt Hancock's app up and running before the easing this week. I do agree though that it does need to ease, I just think it's rushed it a bit. We'll have a peak because of people treating last weekend like a normal holiday weekend, then the impact of crowds on public transport and back in work.
Just my opinion - but I think we've taken a step backward in getting this under control, and have potentially undone a lot of hard work.

FerneGreene where on earth did I say I was a martyr? I think you've interpreted my post incorrectly.
You are more than welcome to stay at home. No one is forcing you out of your house. You will always have that choice.
I believe (and we’re all entitled to our opinion) that we should do our utmost best to protect the most vulnerable of our society. Those of us who are at miniscule risk, and who want to get back out there, should be able to. Not tomorrow, not next week, but soon.

imsooverthisdrama

But the powers that be don't seem to be looking at ways to make it work - it all seems to be a mixture of bravado and bluster, with a dash of Blitz spirit chucked in for good measure. Be alert - great! For what exactly? A big Corona virus hiding behind a tree, waiting to pounce? How can we be alert for an invisible virus?

If we agree on slowly getting back to normality then it had to be done in the context of not allowing the virus to spread so look at countries that are doing this well. South Korea has to be the leader in this. Good test, track and trace systems. Everyone wearing masks, including children.

I could understand more schools going back if everyone had to wear masks and facilities were in place for hand washing. But just sending children back with a "cross your fingers and hope for the best" approach is just fool hardy. Give it a few weeks, maybe even before 1st June, and we will be back where we were in March with the NHS on the point of being overwhelmed.

Everyone, especially the NHS, needs some space to reset. If the second wave comes soon, all routine NHS treatment will still be on hold so patients waiting for that will be waiting even longer, children will be off school longer, the economy will be even worse than now.

Why not maintain lockdown just for another month and get the rate of infection right down? At least we'll have a fighting chance of controlling the spread then.

I personally, and clearly I dont really know, but my gut instinct is we won’t find a vaccine for this very easily. I think years, rather than months.

This is just catastrophising, OP. You're assuming the worst without any knowledge at all of the reality.

And I never once said those wanting to stay at home are selfish so I’m wondering which post you actually read?

Its not the first virus and it won't be the last. Eventually there will be a vaccine and herd immunity and we will all be out and about living with it like we do with other viruses. In the interim, there will be many deaths.

We will have relative normality until the next virus/mutation of this one comes along and then there will be further lockdowns.

Remember the virus is cov sars 2 and the disease it causes is covid-19 - for 2019 - this in itself highlights that there will be future events hence scientists naming it after the year 2019 to differentiate from covid-22 or whatever. although patients contract a viral sepsis that can kill, some will catch bacterial infections too - and we are already facing a future will no useful antibiotics owing to over use both in medicine and in farming etc. I personally think it is the emergence of superbugs and lack of antibiotics that will eventually wipe most of us out.

so yeah, pretty gloomy looking future

I think it's harder on the under 40s because they have never lived through huge quick changes to life before Those of us older remember the impact of AIDS, of 9/11, of lockerbie, of the miners strike...

I remember the first two of those. Both dramatic, important events but their impact on my life was nothing compared to the restrictions we’re living under now.

OP I know you say you don't want to talk about the fact that your partner 'won't let' you facetime friends but you've dropped an elephant into the room, you know that right?

You will be " someone who has retired " one day. Someone who has adult children, very elderly family, a full and interesting life.Someone who volunteered, made a difference, cared for GC. Someone who slogged for 40 odd years and did their best. How dare you tell us to hide away because we are second class citizens.

Yes, one day I hope to retire (though that will likely be over 70 for our generation), and assuming that is the case, if a situation like this arrives I hope, as I do now, that lockdown and track and trace can get it to a point where everyone can go out. If not, I hope I will be able to appreciate that the choices are:
A) or me to stay in and safeguard my own health and that of others, or
B) to go out and risk my life and also those of the NHS workers who care for me, or worse
C) Ask everyone to endure a half life under lockdown in which my grandchildren miss out on socialisation and education, my adult children and millions of others just like I was 40 years before fall into mass poverty and blighted life chances, surviving on Universal Credit, which is far lower than the Pension Credit.

We all have full and interesting lives. And we have all, young and old, put these on hold for lockdown. However if it transpires that unfortunately the disease is too prevalent to be properly suppressed.

I am BAME. My risk is 2 to 2.5 times that of a white person of the same age - and early stage research so far suggest this is not due largely to genes. As someone of pension age, your risk is 34 times that of someone of working age. It's only white older people who seem to make these BAME parallels, and the irony of people claiming age discrimination while not noting the the BAME death rate is itself driven largely by discrimination, systemic as well as direct, would be funny if not so upsetting.

www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/uk-news/2020/may/13/pensioners-34-times-more-likely-to-die-of-covid-19-than-working-age-brits-data-shows

@stuck.....what is your point. I had read that members of the BAME communities were 4 times more likely to be affected.

I am old and white and I obey the rules to the letter.

I'm not sure what you want me to do?

Let's not catastrophise. It's not forever. It obviously won't be forever. It's a limited period of time in a lifetime. I'm not writing my child's childhood off just yet. Realistically we will be in and out of lockdown for awhile still. Children will have opportunities to socialise.

Also I know no one likes to hear about people who had it worse blah blah blah... but it does speak to the ability of the human race to survive and even to thrive. We can come through this. What is the other option? I'm not giving up on joy altogether just because life is a bit crap now.

OP I take it you are locked down in an abusive relationship? That must be a living hell and i'm sorry for you

No. I don’t think this is ‘it’ now

Judging from the crowded roads I saw this morning I think people will/are take themselves out of lockdown
Boris said we are to work if we can-

Besides I can’t imagine how they would re introduce lockdown People ( round here anyway) just won’t do it
People need to earn money - the country needs us to earn money

This virus isn’t going away. We have to learn to live with it until / unless a vaccine is produced

@helpfulperson - I agree with a PP that you can't really compare Lockerbie with the current situation. Although it was desperately sad, both Lockerbie and 9/11 were more a sharp shock than this unrelenting misery, and both changed the way we travelled. AIDS really only affected a small section of society and the miners' strike was something completely different (political).

I can't remember any event in my life (and I am over 60) which has made me so fearful and changed my life so much as Covid has.

Remember the virus is cov sars 2 and the disease it causes is covid-19 - for 2019 - this in itself highlights that there will be future events hence scientists naming it after the year 2019 to differentiate from covid-22 or whatever

@Doggybiccys you’ve read far to much into the name there it’s actually SARS-CoV-19)

@Hearhoovesthinkzebras I used schools for example , i didn't say I think they should or shouldn't go back on the 1st June . I don't have primary age children anyway so it doesn't matter what I think but for what it's worth I think a few more weeks would've been a good idea but I can see why it's June 1st , my point is it needs to be managed . If schools or lockdown is relaxed June / September or next year I think the virus will be around for a while .
It definitely has to be slowly I've said that all along .

gatorgator - the lockdown is not the problem your relationship is. You are living in an abusive relationship and rather than address that as the cause of your stress and anxiety you have projected it onto the lockdown.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=0k84gE7ObuQ
'Special thanks to Professor Woo-Joo Kim from Korea University Guro Hospital for sitting down with us again'

After watching this I feel as if we have have a future of further viruses being released into the human population because people in developing countries are faced with the choice of going hungry or shopping at wildlife markets

I’ve started to feel angry this week. In the foyer at work there were about eight social distancing signs on the floor and the big screen has a huge social distancing sign. I got this overwhelming desire to kick one of the signs over (I didn’t of course)Get in the lift - social distancing sign. In the lunch room- social distancing signs and spots to stand on the floor. Everyone just ignores them. Even the fucking door to the office building have the signs.

For context I’m in South Australia where there has been one new case in weeks and there is only one active case. Unemployment is rising and people are losing their businesses. At least schools are nearly back to normal.

I’m not sure if this anger is a normal reaction but it’s how a I feel at the moment.

I'm also struggling with this new normal. I'm in Sweden so we haven't had lockdown officially but I'm in the high risk group so am effectively in lockdown. We're now allowed to travel for an hour or two in a car but not in order to meet someone in a high risk group. Which means I can't see my daughter. I was ok with this at first, even though I haven't seen her since Christmas, but now it's sinking in that we may never have a vaccine. That this is as good as it gets. So I don't get to see my daughter ever again? She's also high risk and there's no way I'd not follow the advice to keep her safe.

I feel real soul deep sadness setting now.

even if there is no vaccine they will find drugs that will help and lower the death rate-theyre already on to it and trialling new combinations this wont go on forever not seeing anyone

imsooverthisdrama

I agree, it does need to be managed. My point was that it isn't being managed. The whole enterprise seems to be built on keeping our fingers crossed.

I’ve started to feel angry this week. In the foyer at work there were about eight social distancing signs on the floor and the big screen has a huge social distancing sign

Yes, I had this shopping in M&S the other day - lots of store workers with ‘Keep Your Distance!’ emblazoned across the backs of their jackets. Obviously a corporate decision and not the choice of the workers themselves, who I understand are doing a valuable and difficult job - but it felt so dystopian. Even if it’s only for a couple of years I worry that all this distance stuff might engender a lasting mindset of anxiety and mistrust around other people.

No-one's yet developed a human vaccine at scale for a coronavirus (SARS, MERS, before COVID-19, and for animals -- though I believe good progress was made). However, in the past there was much less of a need to do so.
In 1984 an AIDS vaccine was said to be 2 years away ... but that really is a tougher virus to crack than COVID.
But, hopefully better courses of treatment may help before we get there.

@TempsPerduni agree wholeheartedly with your post.
I am grieving so badly for my old life. We loved meeting friends and family regularly for parties, play dates, meals and bbq’s at each other’s houses. We took our two dc on foreign holidays, swimming, shopping, to the theatre, concerts, ice skating etc all the time. I now wish we hadn’t given them such wonderful experiences as they now know how much they are missing out on.
What has surprised me so much is how many of our close friends seem to be loving lockdown and don’t seem to care if it never ends- admittedly these are people who have been furloughed or have both parents off work looking after the children.
I am so scared about the possibility that we will never be allowed in houses of friends and family again. All very well on summer days when you can meet a friend for a walk (if they live close by) but what will this be like in the winter months when it is cold and wet. My eldest dc is suffering so much through this like so many children, there is no hope for the future at all and nothing to look forward to.