I think I was naive.

[Gatorgator]

In my head - when this started - twelve weeks was worst case scenario. I knew the virus wouldn’t go away obviously, but I thought after twelve weeks the nhs would be better prepared, we’d know more about the virus and there would be a degree of acceptance that we just have to live alongside it and know there’s an elevated risk. I’m in an at risk category so I’m not just dismissing this risk.
However instead it seems that we are going to live like this indefinitely. I didn’t think theatres, sporting events etc would be open for a long time, nor did I think the travel industry would pick back up, but I did think I’d be able to visit my elderly parents who live two miles down the road.

Now it seems like this is the new normal. All meetings are going to be virtual. We are having (unsuccessful) virtual play dates with other children. The few friends I’m still communicating with I’m mainly messaging but really - if I’m never seeing them again then what’s the point?

There are a couple of big Christmas things nearby that are annual events and they are cancelled. More and more I’m coming to realise that this is it. This is in fact the new normal everyone keeps talking about. Only seeing the people you live with and being terrified to even leave the house to collect something essential like a prescription.

An advert came on TV last night - think it was for Bold - a lady is going for a job interview, leaves the house, walks down a busy street, talks to some people, goes to a street vendor and buys coffee sort of high fiving him in the process - my dh and I were watching it in amazement, it looked so alien. That was normal life until two months ago. Now it looks like watching a documentary from a by gone era.

Is it the school in Tourcoing (France) that someone was mentioning upthread, with the children in little boxes? That has received criticism even in France. It's on the Belgian border I think, and they have had an especially high number of cases up there. It's not typical.

Here in Saxony, Germany, my bf's ten-year-old is back at school as per normal, just smaller class sizes, and no mixing of two groups. Cinemas and restaurants, gyms and hotels are re-opening on Friday. Saunas, discos and brothels still have to stay closed.

Once the number of cases is as low as it is here, life will gradually feel more normal in the UK too. Not 100% normal, but not as weird as it must feel now. No-one thinks that Corona has been beaten here - we all know we might catch it - but we don't expect to catch it from every single person we accidentally come close to when turning a corner. And if you do catch it here and now you're not going to be in a hospital that's struggling to cope with the numbers.

I think the issue in the UK will be that people are going to have problems mentally adjusting to being allowed to meet people, when it does happen. It's not been such a big difference here.

hmm, I am not saying I disagree, however, when people say they are willing to take their risks, I guess you are talking about taking the risk for yourself, but have you considered the risk of giving it to somebody?

I am at higher risk, but what worries me most is passing it on unwittingly to somebody vulnerable, for example, one of my DC's friend has osteogenesis imperfecta and is therefore at much higher risk then others, he is 7, should I or one of my kids pass the virus to him and he died... I can't even think about it, and what impact would that have on my kids, knowing they were the ones to pass the virus on that killed their friend? or if they passed it on to their grandparents?

and it's not just as simple as saying the vulnerable should be the ones keeping lockdown, because inevitably, the more we go back to normal, the more the virus is prevalent, the higher the risk to the vulnerable, so we should not fool ourselves that when we say we re willing to take the risk that we mean the risk to us personally only

I've been totally fine in lockdown joking to my husband that I'm grateful I'm and introvert (he's still going out to work, I'm at home and have been out 4 times in 7 weeks). But the other day was my Dads birthday and he cracked a joke about having now officially outlived both his parents. My parents live overseas and aren't in great health and I was suddenly overwhelmed by the realisation that I might be missing out on one of the last years I get to spend with them.

I haven't cried (yet) but I'm obsessing over progress on a vaccine.

OP if you parents are 2 miles away - don’t wait for permission to go.

They will never grant it.

The only way this all falls apart is if people refuse to live this way.

I've been cushioned from this to a certain extent by having been really ill through it all. I literally wouldn't have been able to do anything else other than stay at home and mostly in bed. And my DH is vulnerable, as he has asthma, so obviously he has to be careful anyway. So we haven't really felt hard done by. Plus, my DH can work from home.

But my DD2 (8) has been acting up so much recently and it really came to a head last night. She was finally able to express her sadness that she can't visit her friends or have them visit her, despite them living very close by. They're normally in and out of each other's houses and this is so hard for her to cope with.

DD1 (11) has SEN and adoption related attachment issues (they're both adopted), and the lack of routine is affecting her badly.

I'm really hoping that this antibody test will be available soon so we can find out for sure whether we've had the virus and have immunity to it. (DD2 was ill too, for 4 days, so she may well have it.)

The problem with this virus isn't that it's dangerous to large numbers of people but that it's incredibly infectious.

@Doggybiccys It’s 19 because that’s the year it was discovered and other variants of Coronavirus already exist. It’s not pre-empting other novel infections to come.

The International Committee on Taxonomy of Viruses calls it the SARS-CoV-2, because it is related to the virus that caused the SARS outbreak. To avoid confusion WHO call it covid-19. Co -Corona Vi - virus D - disease 19 - year it was discovered

@Gatorgator you're sensible, not naive.

The terrible state of the world at the moment is the result of the naive people grossly overreacting to an inevitable part of life. We've lived with worse and we will no doubt have to cope with worse again sooner or later.
If this is now "normal", it's because that's how the majority of people want it. But it does not have to stay normal, if enough people wise up and decide they want to live rather than exist. Sensible people like you need to keep the faith and make sure the politicians know that we want LIFE -including death at the end - not miserable existence and still death at the end.

I fancy going to a local shop today to get some plants (open for business). I’m not at all scared of catching the virus on the trip, I’m more scared of the aggressive looks and tuts from people who think you shouldn’t be within 10 meters of them. I’m worried I’ll be deemed to not be following the ‘rules’ properly. It’s easier to not go.

The little boy crying happy tears seeing his friend in the car broke me

It kills me that I may not see my nan again. I'm not the only person in that situ but it's so hard.

The terrible state of the world at the moment is the result of the naive people grossly overreacting to an inevitable part of life*
Yes -absolutely spot on.

I keep hearing people saying they're planning to go on holiday July/August to uk seasides. It's got me wondering if we should?

Merlin “ Sensible people like you need to keep the faith and make sure the politicians know that we want LIFE -including death at the end - not miserable existence and still death at the end.”

So nice to hear this!

@Gatorgator yes my post is very unhelpful if your partner doesn’t let you FaceTime people. Do you have real life support as it sounds like your partner is isolating you even further x

hmm, I am not saying I disagree, however, when people say they are willing to take their risks, I guess you are talking about taking the risk for yourself, but have you considered the risk of giving it to somebody?

No, I’m talking about the risk to the vast majority of people. Hence saying that resources absolutely should be directed towards those most vulnerable. Financial help, physical help and mental health help.
As I said, those who don’t want to take any risk are free to stay at home. No one is forcing them out of their houses. The government saying that people can drive for long walks etc doesn’t mean anyone has to.

From the few posts on this thread we can see how this will go.

If we keep the R down then we can progress along the road to normality. If the R starts to rise then they will shut things down again so the more people who think "sod this, I'm off out to live my life" then then quicker the R will go back up and we'll all be locked down again.

Can't people just follow the rules for once rather than only think about themselves?

I can't get my head round the new "relaxed " rules. I think that I can go anywhere for a day trip now, but I don't want to because there are no car parks or toilets open and part of the joy is a pint in the country pub or coffee and cake, the local museum or some shopping, it doesn't feel like a proper freedom. I wake up sometimes and think that it is just some continuing nightmare and will be over soon. I go to work ( social care) every day so there are days when life doesn't feel much different but then on other days there are major problems and I remember some;one might die if I make a wrong decision, not what I signed up for. But what can you do, there is no way out.

If I'd been brave DH and I would have retired and gone to live in Portugal ( they have not had very much Covid there) 2 years ago. WE would be doing yoga on the beach and enjoying life. Instead I spend my days being shouted at by irate social workers and worrying myself silly about my service users. It feel s a bit like having fallen into the wrong parallel universe in the final episode of Devs.

Hearhoovesthinkzebras I am following the rules, to the letter, and will continue to do so. Doesn’t mean I necessarily agree with them.

I totally agree with you TempsPerdu and you expressed it so well.

I'm the lowest I've ever been thanks to this virus. I can't sleep at night through worry. I'm so angry at China for causing the virus, whether it was from the filthy wet market where animals were treated so appallingly, or whether it 'escaped' from the lab, it's China's fucking fault. I'm so scared, well in fact terrified, about the future for my daughter whose nearly 5. What will it be like for her? No hugs from anyone except her parents, social distancing at school, all the kids playing alone inside a square box drawn with chalk in the playground, never being able to walk to school holding hands with her best friend who lives across the road, virtual 'play dates'. These things can all fuck off as far as I'm concerned. What a bleak, miserable, joyless, sterile existence. At least I, aged 44, have been able to enjoy life until now, with the 'old normal'. I'd cut off my right arm for her to have a childhood that was half as good as the one I had. I was trying to homeschool her this morning and I thought to myself, what is even the point in doing this any more? I keep going though, trudging along, watching the days go by, nothing to look forward to. It's shit.

if people refuse to live this way
refuse to take precautions against catching a dangerous virus is that what you mean, you want to throw caution to the wind?
What about the people who don't want to take the risk, what about the people who would rather adapt and find a way of living which minimises the risk?
or will you still insist that you want to live the way that you want to
I'm sure there were people who had AIDS who insisted on their right to throw caution to the wind and have unprotected sex, is that a fair comparison?

Why is it such a miserable existence for you all though? For me it's a bit boring and ground hog day, but it's generally ok. I am very privileged to be healthy, still working, living with people I love and I have a small garden. That obviously makes lockdown relatively easy. Those of you who find it intolerable - is it because you don't have these things? I'm sure if I was living in an abusive relationship or had lost my job I'd be really distressed too so I'm not judging, but those of us who have not had any real tragedy - what makes it so intolerable?

It's China's fucking fault
people in developing countries often are in situations where in order to get enough food to eat they have to catch and kill wild animals, these are the circumstances in which diseases transfer from other animals into the human population.
What do you propose we do about people in developing countries who don't have enough food to eat?
that's why we have these diseases

those who don’t want to take any risk are free to stay at home. No one is forcing them out of their houses.
Is that still the case in the UK? Here, for example, if you work in a gym and your employer is planning to open up again this Friday, then you're having to weigh up your fear of the virus v. your fear of losing your job.