What has lockdown taught you about yourself?

[ssd]

I didn't realise what an introvert I am, I'm really not missing anyone. I'm glad of the peace. I now know why I get so antsy sometimes, I just need time alone. I like company when I choose it, I hate it forced on me.
And I don't need to shop every day, or every other day and I've saved a fortune. When everything gets on top of me I go to the shops, probably to be alone!!

What about you?

That I am more anxious than I thought
I put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect at home and at work

That I like routine and am not the complete lazy arse I thought I was. I have to do something productive each day to feel ok.

yeah I've been pondering starting a thread to see if anyone else, feels the same as me.

like you I've dont miss anyone.

I have actually found my life hasn't really changed. I'm really not fussed about going out at all. it's nice every now again. But so far the not going out to pubs, clubs, restaurants, friends wine nights, day time activities hasn't had an effect.

I do still go out twice a day to do my horse, and see people there(at a safe distance) though. maybe I'd feel different if I didn't have that to do?

DH does a top up shop once a week at local small garage shop, which only let 2 in at time and is has the perspex at the counter. I don't miss food shopping.

I see the amount of people desperate to record you vids and have zoom parties and quizzes and I just dont get it.

I do miss my job though it's a job I love doing, and had a perfect work life balance.

That I'm not a particularly good mum. I'm too selfish to be with my kids 24/7.

That my mental health isn't as strong as I thought it was.

Its taught me who I really appreciate. Some people I've not missed at all.

I like being at home with my family. Before I used to want or feel the need to go out and explore things. I have discovered that it is nice to do bugger all...and still there isn't enough time in the day to do that!

Honestly, I'm the same and thought I was odd as hearing about so many people struggling. It's refreshing to read I'm not the only one.

I'm locked in with my favourite people, DP and DD and there has been tense times but apart from having to find things to do at the weekend I've really enjoyed it.

I'm also locked away from people/family members that give me stress and put pressure on me. I think that's why I'm happy about it.

I can live totally alone and be completely happy.

That I’m not a teacher and I’m making my son hate school by tryi to get him to do the bloody school work that we have to upload every fucking day. That I resent my husband who is sat in his office tapping away, because he is even more shit at teaching than me and so it is all fallen to me, despite the fact that I also have a business to run, and which I’m now supposed to do on 3 hours a day. Sorry hung a really crappy time today and just needed to say it to someone

@GrumpySausage yes it's taught me I'm not a great mum either, for the same reasons. The way I see it, we can work on it while we have the opportunity

I am definite an introvert too. I don't miss anyone.
Also, I shouldn't dye my own hair!

That I’m a great deal more autistic than I realised , and that I probably have some sort of eating disorder - or at least, very big food issues . I’ve had endless tears and exhaustion because I can’t handle the lack of routine .

That I can lose weight by training my appetite downwards, and walking for miles in my kitchen.

That I do still have the patience for long, ponderous books.

That I chose DP pretty well, he's been more patient with home schooling than me.

That I actually like commercial radio.

That I am utterly unproductive working from home and if my employer could see me I'd be sacked.

I'm not fussed about life outside my little home either. I always thought I was a mixture of extrovert and introvert (there is a name for that am sure) seems i'm more intro than I thought. Maybe because i'm from a big family so used to not getting attention etc. I'm just not fussed about meeting up with people a few texts here and there is enough for me. I'm not even bored.

Sorry for people who are anxious, missing loved ones desperately etc.

I still have anxiety related to work stress and cutting my commute hasn't helped with that.

@pitterpatterrain I have just downloaded the Calm app and enjoying so far.

I guess this is the time in our life that is suited towards introversion.

I don't like my co workers very much and an actually enjoying my job when I can do it in solitude in the comfort of my arm chair.

I worry too much about what other people who's opinions don't really matter think of me and am far more relaxed about my appearance than I have been in years.

I do not miss people other than my family, who I miss bitterly.

That I am, in fact, a person who enjoys getting into pyjamas as soon as the kids are in bed. I never knew this about myself before (I usually work evenings but am furloughed).

And that I don't need to go shopping anywhere near as frequently as I was doing.

I think I should add, that i probably won't be so content if my DC were younger. they are teens so rarely see them and don't have to get involved with teaching.

i know how crap i would have been stuck in with them if they were younger. But again that might be because I'm an introvert.

I don't have that many friends and I find groups really overwhelming. My husband's (large) group of school friends do a couples zoom every week and it stresses me out.

Two people have said they discovered they aren't a great mum.
Thing is, it is unnatural for us to be around our kids so much. It causes a lot of frustration, resentment and misery in many women.
It's not you. I think it's impossible to function as a 'whole' person while giving yourself to someone else all the time.
For me, that is what it has highlighted.

That I am definitely not cut out to be a SAHM, and how much respect I have for parents that enjoy it! I’m sick of crafts and baking now

My natural sleep pattern has and always will be stay up to early hours and get up late. Fortunately teen DD is same and we are happily co existing. My most compatible work hours were when I worked 2-10pm shift as an 18 year old in a holiday job before uni. I've recommend to DD to think about jobs with shift work as she is just like me.
Always been happy with own company, still am.
I've missed swimming and being able to walk dog as much as I did. Not much else.

That I’m still nuts and can’t cope with nothing to do.

That I have a very judgy side that I am finding unpleasant (I am hoping it is because I am in the deep throws of perimenipause and this will change once I can actually get some HRT!!)

That, apart from the gym, spin classes and browsing shops (on my own) I'm not really missing that much.

That not having to do the school run - and have socially awkward interactions - is making me so much happier

That I spend a lot of money on unnecessary shite

I didn’t realise how risk averse I am. My parents and siblings are too. None of us want to go out at all whereas I know people who are still working and going round the shops and bending the rules so they can visit people and do their own thing.

I have always thought of myself as an outgoing person but I can see the appeal in a much more peaceful and simple life without all the rushing around being busy that I thought I liked.

Maybe I am also more anti-social than I thought in my old age. I have realised that there are only a few friends that I want to spend time with when all this is over. The others will fall by the wayside and that’s ok.

I started thinking I wasn't a good Mum either, but that's just fucking bollocks. We're in the middle of a global pandemic, and it's bloody hard work. I am not the best Mum when I'm with DS 24/7, but that's ok. He's not exactly at his best at the mo either (little bugger).