Jackass whisperers against the cheap beer virus

[PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock]

Thread number...4?!? Fucking hell I've never been so popular.

Keep on keeping on and ,moan,whinge and laugh while you enjoy your deliveries and cackle evilly while you kill thousands.

All under the benevolent eye of your awesome , yellow and very ripe leader.

May the bleach be with you.

I am Dorothy now!! 😄😄
Or Ouiser take your pick😉

Willow Ooh Sigourney! This movie is going to have an A list cast!!

It's been a full on day many ups and downs. I'm getting an early one after a very long bath.

Have a fab evening everyone x

Hey all!

Sorry peoples parents are being a pain. Mine has mental health issues but is actually faring well. However, its quite nice to not have to see her al the time. I have had to sternly tell her to stop texting while I work though.

@PrincessConsueIaBananaHammock oh glorious leader....which arsenal? My own is fine.

My boss has been put back in his box. He wasn't happy that I turned my phone off. I pointed out if he was going to insist H&S included me on all update emails, that have nothing to do wigh me all weekend ON MY BIRTHDAY he could expect me to turn it off.

I explained it wasnt acceptable to make people feel they were expected to work all weekend especially ON THEIR BIRTHDAY.

My work load also tripled. As I predicted and he wouldn't let me bring anyone back to my team. I took your advice. So I told him I will get to it when I get to it. He was actually OK, by the end. Though I did point out that his support of staff left working was absolutely dire and I have ended up with colleagues crying down the phone because they are so stressed. He also wished me happy birthday. Then left me alone. He is also aware 13 hours days won't be happening again

If you mean Dp, we have been fine. Back to normal. I am redoing my birthday this weekend this will include a sleep in AND doing absolutely fuck all, all day and hin giving me space.

My murder rate has been low as I only walked the dog. I will step it up later in the week. We are travelling further out, to go to a lidl.

So many arseholes , no wonder shit's getting crazy

What i want to know more is your arsenal... is it AK47 or soldiers? Or the rubbish football team(you can keep that one)

Working from home and homeschooling

If not low on cyan, just print this off for your partners/husbands/old enough kids.

Now that i like.
Mind you when i slumped on the sofa after work telling kids to put the damm shopping away ds2 did poke his head round the door and ask if i wanted anything poured? 😄😄😄 is that good or bad i am not sure🤣🤣

I think that is awesome parenting. Perfectly trained with no need of reminders or visual aids. My kid still licks me sometimes

I'm so tempted right now. That's why I shouldn't have any real power. 🙈

P.S. Yes,I know I'm rambling and being random. Deal with it.

Oh i could try that i might bloody sleep for once!

Thanks all for your kind posts. I spent half the day in bed feeling a bit overwhelmed by everything. Then DH talked me into going for a drive to talk the dog to the woods. We saw lots of families sitting about playing and eating, all at a distance as it’s a huge area. We even saw people playing golf as we cut over an unused course which is now a public area. All looked to be having fun. So my city will probably make headline news in a week when we are all dead. Felt much better for getting out and seeing life going on :)

Sorry those who are having parent issues, my dads been pretty well behaved surprisingly. Wasn’t sure which way he’d go with this as he’s stubborn but is oddly chilled and his garden is now looking amazing

Glad you get a redo of your birthday @Shitsgettingcrazy it does sound like he wanted to make it special and failed badly. But his heart was in the right place. If he does it again this weekend though get your Spanish soldier to dispose of him! 😂

Has anyone used public transport to go anywhere?

LilacTree
Never use public transport unless taking the kids to Edinburgh and we get the park and ride train in. Car is much more useful where I live, only a few buses round here.

Completely agree that the government's 'stay home stay safe' thing has back fired. You only have to read this board to see that people think if they stay at home the virus will magically disappear, and then there are others (not shielding) who haven't stepped outside their door for 6 weeks. I blame the hysterical reporting and the 'fear porn' in the media.

pigeons maybe you like in same place as same at our golf course. the death toll must be huge.

Raining here today, no no hilly walk this morning. At least don't have to do it, I guess. Watched Contagion last night, daft idea as woke in the night scared. Won't do that again. Just a daft film.

Yes how are they going to convince people to go out now they aren't safe? Much less emotive approach in some other nearby countries to the reporting apparently. Think they will manage this time better.

Loving the Safety chart above, just showed it to DH. You know how I was rambling about why can't they just take the virulent to the big hospitals and let the others get on, well there is a plan to do this today, sounds good.

"Britain’s Nightingale hospitals are being lined up to become the primary centres for treating Covid-19 patients as ministers announced that parts of the NHS would start reopening for routine care from this week.

Under proposals being discussed in government and the NHS the ten new hospitals would aim to care for as many coronavirus patients as possible allowing hospitals to be “Covid-free zones”.

Sorry a bit sensible there!

Apparently, they scared people off using the normal hospitals and coming in when ill, that that has killed 10,000 people.

People without the virus.

I think a fair few people who are currently excessively staying home tend to be crowd followers. Once the crowd starts getting out and about they'll somehow magically forget that they were going to stay home until there's a vaccine. I could be wrong.

There will of course be a some hold outs (and some people with medical conditions who have good reason for continuing to distance). I'll be intrigued to see how local education authorities manage truancy rules for the next year or so!! Technically these people could of course officially become home-schoolers, but my guess is many of them won't want to lose a school place.

Lilac Has anyone used public transport to go anywhere?

I know some elderly people living rurally are reliant on it. My parent's rural service has been cut so can't get to the shops which is a nightmare as many won't deliver either. PIL's friends also getting the bus, over 70s and with illnesses. They said they were the only ones on it though.

So the only ones I know, are the over 70s...

Patte yes definitely think people follow what others do, you're right. Look at the toilet paper stockpiling. That was meant to be driven by people watching others mainly, and joining in. People can be such sheep at times

Morning my fellow riotous Bananians and our esteemed and most magnificent and fruity of leaders.

For the movie. Can I please be a morph between Meryl Streep (think Out of Africa) being all swashbuckly in a feminine way and Anneka-ka-ka Rice. I'd swoop in and out on helicopters with an AK47 strapped to my back.

Orange - I think covid-hospitals is the way to go. If I were Boris for the day, I'd commission all of the cruise ships and equip them with ventilators and stuff. The medics and support staff could all live on board. They could be anchored all the way around the UK.

As a treat, if the patients make it to recovery, they get tended to by Italian doctors who look like the cast from Grey's Anatomy.

I claim first dibs on the one who is married to the chief of the hospital. You know, the super fit one who leaves medicine to become a fireman. In fact, can he be in the movie? Oh and can the billionaire trust fund one be in it too? Those eyes...

Right...I need a break. I'm swooning at the thought.

Pinkgin they have big hospital ships in the US bit think it was just showing off as none seemed to go on it and in India, they are sticking them in trains...Cake sounds lovely. Maybe can convince the vampires to cook something. They can make a mean cheesecake. Is it still supposed to be highly risky to send the DC out to the shops I wonder. Not sure why they son;t seem to be allowed to go. Could pick up the cooking things.