People having family and friends visit

[BackInTime]

Why do some people think that it's ok to have friends and family over? That they are special and the rules do not apply to them. So infuriating and an insult to those of us who are missing seeing our loved ones.

popping round to see your mum and sit in the garden at a distance is a calculated risk not if everyone does it it doesn’t.
Perhaps it is better we go on complete lock down, stop everyone thinking they are exempt.

Maybe I’m on American Mumsnet given some of the views on here

The judginess of people is the most dispiriting. People have differing needs and a lonely single mother who takes her toddler to another friend's house is none of my business as a person in a house with garden, secure job, hobbies. Live and let live and do not judge!
And agree re 75% expected compliance. Gvt never expected or could reasonably expect 100%.

pisses me off my neighbours keep having people to visit and I find it really infuriating actually, no reason for it just pure selfishness

formerbabe now don’t be so unfair, as many have stated they have weighed up the risk

For all of you who have "decided to take the risk", please remember that you're not just risking your own lives. What gives you the right to make that decision?

I hope to god my DP isn't the paramedic that has to come out to get you!

The 'everyone will do it' argument is irrelevant and meaningless.

'Everyone' could have done it from the start of lockdown. Legislation really doesn't cover a few people going to other peoples houses and never has.

So those going to do it are already. It hasn't dramatically changed in the last few days and no evidence to suggest it's growing.

We always knew some people would do what they wanted and based on their own risk assessment.

Maybe a few more will now because they're fed up or struggling with whatever.

Those people were factored in to 'lockdown' which is 'working' far better than anticipated.

For every person doing that there are far more adhering to guidelines and far, far more (going by MN) who have gone the other way completely and not leaving their house for weeks on end when they absolutely could and should be.

They won't be going out even when restrictions are relaxed.

That's how things work on a population level. It evens out.

@MikeBawldwinsBras I am not convinced, having read some of the responses here and going what I witness out there the fear has passed and lockdown is now a farce.

My neighbour is having a garden party again tonight. She does this every weekend in summer, and obviously sees no reason to stop just because it is illegal now.

She’s a barrister in her late 50s, so plenty old enough to know better. Lives with her partner, still goes out to work (which is obviously totally fine), and his daughter and grandchildren come round a few times a week, so she’s definitely not some poor lonely thing on her own.

Currently 20 people out there, music on, barbecue going, shrieking and drunken singing starting up. They carried on until 2am last week. It’s irritating at the best of times (it is every single week, and she is a complete bitch the rest of the time anyway). Really pissing me off at the moment.

ChristmasCarcass
Report!

Oh and we’re zone 2 SE London, so probably the highest risk place in the country to have a large gathering.

@Backintime

That's what is so funny from those posts from people saying 'everyone will do it'.

YOU'RE not going to do it. I'm pretty sure you're not alone in that and there'll be hundreds of thousands or millions of people panicking saying 'everyone will do it ...but I won't' so..there's hundred of thousands or millions of people who won't be.

So not 'everyone will do it' at all. The very fact you who is worrying that 'everyone will do it' wouldn't do it proves not 'everyone' will do it.

OnlyFoolsnMothers I am really tempted, I would overlook the partner’s daughter and grandkids because that is pretty much their own stupid fault if they pass it between themselves. But a massive weekly party takes the fucking piss.

I think people saying I hope you don't get treatment or you get sick and die just shows how nasty and selfish everyone is becoming when the stakes are high it's sad to see and taking that view is a bad reflection on yourself as a person.
Some people have many reasons of why they have visited relatives etc I don't agree with people having party's and get togethers but I haven't seen it myself and where I live it's something I expected and hasn't happened.
There's an elderly lady next door her two daughters visit they don't live there but someone has to help her and they sit in the garden with her do I wish them to get sick and not be treated no I don't because I understand why they have to come and see her. They are putting her at risk but without their help she's at risk anyway.
I haven't seen anyone flouting the rules at all but this surveillance and holier then thou attitude is really starting to grate.
In a month life will have to have a little normality back for most of us anyway at some level what are we going to do then how will we cope with it.

I just find people's attitudes stink at this time we're all concerned we're all human aswell let's not forget that.

Bit like paying tax really isn’t it? Everyone else can do it.

They are putting her at risk but without their help she's at risk anyway

That's exactly it. You're damned if you do and damned if you don't. If the family don't visit and the elderly lady forgets to take her medication (for example) should she be refused treatment for that too? After all, it's self inflicted...

It's a bit of a slippery slope argument.

Oh and we’re zone 2 SE London I’m zone 4 SE London, I’ll bloody report them.

Yes the attitudes on this thread stink- the people that think their longing for their loved ones is worse than everyone else’s- sticking two fingers up to closed businesses, nhs staff, frontline workers and every other sod who’s following the rules!

It's a bit of a slippery slope argument no it really isn’t. Medical help/ caring is allowed! People who just miss their families so go see them are the issue.

The numbers today are the result of behaviour that happened weeks ago, though.

@whiskybysidedoor exactly. Everyone else can do it . “I’m special and different so l don’t have to” is the vibe

@maria860 well said.

Those having parties/meeting up with friends or whatever are taking the piss, but they're in a tiny minority. Those visiting elderly/vulnerable people are a different thing entirely. And you don't know, when you see a neighbour receiving visitors, what their story is.

The efficacy of the lockdown was based on around 75% of the public adhering to it. It's believed that over 90% of us are. The levelling off of hospital cases and transmission bears this out.

To be honest, I think we're doing brilliantly in a thoroughly shit situation. The very few who genuinely aren't following the guidelines are no reason to judge those acting within the law so harshly.

That's exactly it. You're damned if you do and damned if you don't. If the family don't visit and the elderly lady forgets to take her medication (for example) should she be refused treatment for that too? After all, it's self inflicted...

It's a bit of a slippery slope argument

It's not a slippery slope.

The situation you described is allowed. You are allowed to help a vulnerable person.

Blimey...this is hard work.

We visit my MIL every weekend. She lives in a v large house with extensive grounds. DC cycled to her her house, mowed the grass, while we cut brambles and had a bonfire. She sat and chatted from about 8 metres away on her bench.

I received a message from an old work colleague last week saying she was on her way to meet a guy (at his place) who she’d been speaking to on Tinder (she sent the address she was going to just in case anything happened).
I questioned why she wasn’t socially distancing and she said because she didn’t want or need to.
I told her it would no doubt be a good match since he was obviously as stupid as her. Obviously wanting a shag trumps everything else.

We have been asked to STAY AT HOME. Not to visit family and/or friends and stay 2 metres apart!!!!!
No-one knows whether 2 metres is enough! It could be 4 or 5.
STAY AT HOME!

We visit my MIL every weekend. She lives in a v large house with extensive grounds. DC cycled to her her house, mowed the grass, while we cut brambles and had a bonfire

Ffs...a bonfire...really? Whilst there's a pandemic which causes respiratory problems...excellent idea said no one.