Something wrong with me, loving lockdown

[Coronackered]

I love that nobody coming toy door, I live that I don't feel obligated to visit family, only thing I'm hating is they're phoning me more often. I have a lovely family what is wrong with me 😭

I wouldn't go as far as saying that I'm loving it but my life has been far more peaceful. I work in a very demanding job with a commute into London which takes 1 hour both ways . I've been having to juggle after school care for a few months due to some changes and it has recently brought a lot of stress amongst us. It's been soo calm working from home and spending some quality time with ds. Not having to spend money doing expensive dinners and social drinks after work. I haven't looked at my diary in two weeks and it's somehow liberating. I probably spend more time having more meaningful conversations with my friends as opposed to a night out after work. I do feel closer to them emotionally now .

It's been nice waking up this morning and not having to worry about where to take the ds, prepping and the nightmare of dragging us out of the house . Its been early days so who knows how I feel a bit later in the future but then again I've got quite a bit of stuff to do around the house which I've been meaning to do for a long time !!! I am truly going to try to make good out of an awful situation

I'd go so far as to say it's pretty cruel.

No it isn't cruel, you've trashed an innocent woman who is just trying to make the best of this situation in her own way like we all are by making it all about you. If you don't like this post then there are plenty of others.
Come and work with me on the frontline everyday, you will soon forget all this kind of nonsense, stop obssessing about something someone said on a forum and see the big picture. Which is basically people dying and leaving their families behind.
I can still appreciate this thread because when I get a day off work I don't want to see or speak to anyone or deal with anyone elses problems. That doesn't make me a bitch and you have no idea what struggles OP has in her life, not everyone wants to broadcast what is going on.

I would love it without children, I'd read, watch tv, potter, sleep!!

Smug people boasting about how great it is for them while others are suffering is just part of normal life unfortunately, we're all impacted by that every single day

I don't see anyone boasting here, just trying to find their personal positives, I think people are surprised there have been some. I'm trying to hang on to them because everything else is shit. For all of us. And we don't know how much worse it might get.

I'm sorry how the current situation is impacting your life, no one can have anticipated how this would impact ourselves or anyone else, almost no time to think or plan. I'm not going to pretend I can imagine exactly how you're feeling at the moment, I'll take you at your word, but I know from personal experience how devastating and prison-like EDs can be. I really do hope the gym equipment you need turns up or you can find some kind of workaround and get support, if you need or want it.

I still have to go to work and the supermarket. My life hasn't changed much yet. I'm an introvert, so when/if I do go into lockdown I will enjoy it. I am already enjoying the cleaner air and peaceful atmosphere. I don't know anyone that has the virus and I don't have any real worries yet.

@ScarlettBlaize I go to the gym everyday too, I love it, need it for my mental health however i have very bad social anxiety and so its nice to not have to worry about going and saying hi to everyone or have to talk to people who come up to me(theres a lot of regulars who come up to me to talk and I feel obliged to)
Ita possible to both LOVE and gym and also LOVE having a break from the social aspect.
I have already had gym equipment at home luckily so Its not been too bad but of course i miss the equipment at the gym that i cant get at home..I'm trying to make the best of the situation.
You sound very bitter and angry

@ScarlettBlaize there is nothing wrong with trying to find a positive in a situation that you can’t control.

Stop trying to shame people for refusing to wallow in the misery and fear of the situation.

Stop twisting the intention that is clearly behind the thread.

YOU are the one being cruel. Why is that? Why do you feel the need to speak such harsh words? Do you want to only see fear, terror, anxiety, and misery at all times? Will that be enough for you?

I know what you mean but I think the novelty will wear off soon. We're still in the first week! We had so many plans over the next few months. These were all good plans seeing friends and family but to be honest quite exhausting. The fact that we've been forced to cancel everything is, in a way, a relief. I always feel our lives are too hectic and am appreciating living a very quiet life for now. However I do miss and worry about my family and would love to see friends.

Those who are relieved that they don't have to pay so much attention to demanding parents ....this is a good time to make a new normal😉😉

@madcatladyforever No it isn't cruel, you've trashed an innocent woman who is just trying to make the best of this situation in her own way like we all are by making it all about you.

No. If she posted 'is there something wrong with me to appreciate the positives/make the best of it/see the silver lining' there would be nothing wrong with that.

To say she is 'LOVING' it is cruel and insensitive and fucked-up.

Come and work with me on the frontline everyday, you will soon forget all this kind of nonsense

Thank you for working on the frontline, I am grateful for the work you do.

That doesn't make me a bitch and you have no idea what struggles OP has in her life, not everyone wants to broadcast what is going on.

She wants to 'broadcast' that she 'loves' this terrible situation. It's not surprising if people find that upsetting.

@Snorkelface I don't see anyone boasting here, just trying to find their personal positives
We read it differently then.

I know from personal experience how devastating and prison-like EDs can be. I really do hope the gym equipment you need turns up or you can find some kind of workaround and get support, if you need or want it.

Thanks for your kind words. I don't think there is a workaround or support available (for me or thousands of others ) at the moment. People are having their cancer treatment stopped.

@Surly I go to the gym everyday too, I love it, need it for my mental health however i have very bad social anxiety and so its nice to not have to worry about going and saying hi to everyone or have to talk to people who come up to me(theres a lot of regulars who come up to me to talk and I feel obliged to) Ita possible to both LOVE and gym and also LOVE having a break from the social aspect. I have already had gym equipment at home luckily so Its not been too bad but of course i miss the equipment at the gym that i cant get at home..I'm trying to make the best of the situation. You sound very bitter and angry

Not sure about 'bitter' (never really understand why people use that word all the time) but yes, I am angry and I am suffering, and I find this thread title sickening.

@OhCaptain there is nothing wrong with trying to find a positive in a situation that you can’t control. Stop trying to shame people for refusing to wallow in the misery and fear of the situation. Stop twisting the intention that is clearly behind the thread.

See above. She's not 'tryng to find the positives' She says she's 'LOVING' it. She's relishing the excuse to not see her parents.

Why do you feel the need to speak such harsh words? Do you want to only see fear, terror, anxiety, and misery at all times? Will that be enough for you?

Because this thread is cruel and appalling.

My gran described her time in the land army as some of the best fun of her life.

She also lost a brother in the war.

It is perfectly possible to look for - and find - silver linings in some shit scenarios.

@madcatladyforever

You won't die not seeing your parents for a few weeks.

No. But they might well die before I see them again. Forgive me for minding that a bit, eh?

The only person tearing strips off people was you ScarlettBlaize. Until you had your rant on your first post on this thread it was a mostly a nice thread about people finding the positives in what is a pretty dire situation for us all. We're all finding it hard to some degree, but this thread is talking about the positives some of have been surprised to find.
I think you're aiming your angst and insecurities at the wrong people. Why join a thread that's being positive about the situation of you're not feeling that way?

I'm sorry you're struggling. We all.are in some way.

Go and start your own thread about how shit you feel and I'm sure you'll find some likeminded people who will be on your wavelength and you can share your worries ànd angst together. You'd probably get more out of that than lashingboit on people trying to find some.goid in these current bleak times.

There is no need tolash out at us on here unnecessarily.

@ScarlettBlaize you’ve read it as “cruel and appalling”. A lot of people haven’t.

So why not take yourself elsewhere then? Nobody is making you read it.

@Surly equipment is less of an issue (I'm waiting for weights but I have a skipping rope, ball, boxing gloves/pads, and resistance bands) but I go for around 2 hours a day and I almost always do classes. I need to lose myself in the loud music and the movement and it's the onl y time in the day I feel OK. It's like meditation or something - takes me out of myself. Now i have no outlet to do that apart from drinking and/or purging/self-harming/restricting.

I have small children at home who are on my case 24/7 and want to join in with me every time I exercise. I've been running very late at night but that is hard to do. It's not about the physical movement so much as having a little space of my own which is crucial to me in managing my ED. I can no longer do that.

@RarePackOfLooRoll
I'm not lashing out at people trying to find the positives but peopel who actively saying how brilliant it is and how much they love it and prefer it to their normal lives.

A poster on the first page said she's an introvert married to an extrovert so for the first time she's got the lifestyle she wants.

Go and start your own thread about how shit you feel and I'm sure you'll find some likeminded people who will be on your wavelength and you can share your worries ànd angst together. You'd probably get more out of that than lashingboit on people trying to find some.goid in these current bleak times.

I don't want to start a thread. I don't want to post on this one either. I find social media/mumsnet a fun distraction sometimes in normal life but at the moment it's just making everything worse tbh, so you're probably right that I shouldn't post/read here or indeed anywhere.

Back down the fucking black hole it is then.

Ignore the grumps! I too am experiencing some lovely positives during this strange time. We’re spending some lovely quality time together as a family, loads of playing, more relaxation time, cooking more, chance to have a tidy up/clear out, getting around to those jobs that never got done😆 Also the weather has helped with some nice walks and time in the garden. Kids have been connecting with friends online and I’ve spoke with my extended family more than I usually do! I do miss the gym a lot but we bought a kettlebell a few weeks back so can still get in some decent works outs at home.

"My gran described her time in the land army as some of the best fun of her life."

yes. I have a feeling I'm going to be one of the people who talks about how amazing the early days of lockdown were. Maybe all of it if mum stays well. I'm an introvert, physical and mental health issues, and while I've lost work there's a lot of other positives. I think you're brave to start this thread OP.

however, I want lockdown to end because of the economy and the emotional impact on many. I shudder to think what lives will be lost in a depression and what living cirumstances will be if this continues.

Scarlett " I need to lose myself in the loud music and the movement and it's the onl y time in the day I feel OK. It's like meditation or something"

yes I totally get this, I used to be the same. Sorry if it's mentioned upthread, is there someone at home who can keep the kids out of the way while you have music in headphones and work out hard?

I'm with you OP. I am a parent, have a lovely family, well travelled, go to the theatre a few times a year and have a busy job in banking but when I thought about what I would want to do first when lockdown is over I could only come up with "have a Big Mac Meal"

I'm horrified at how small I'm happy for my world to be. And I am thinking daily about those people in poverty or with difficult or SEN DC with no outdoor space to enjoy. The misery for some will be unbearable

@AutumnRose1
Thanks - yes, their father is here too but the kids can't seem to go more than about 5 minutes without getting into a fight and he starts shouting at them. Even headphones doesn't drown it out. It's very very different from the gym.

My gym is huge with no windows so it really is like a total escape from the outside world. I was managing to keep things more or less on an even keel but it's fucked beyond belief now.

Going for a 5/10km run late at night has been the only thing that has come close and it's still like running a bloody obstacle course having to steer 2 metres clear of any other human beings.

I am happy at home apart from the obvious Armageddon concerns. Partner just asked if I want to come on the daily dog walk but I think I would rather get on with planting my seeds and the muck sbout with the sewing machine. On weekdays I am too shattered after hours at the screen.

I like it too op. I'm enjoying spending quality time with the kiddies and the sense of peace in the household.

Scarlett my next post was to say I'm sorry IV upset you cause your struggling but you've went on to comment that I said I don't miss my elderly relatives. I am crushed by this statement, I have none they are all dead. I have not long lost my mum and nursed her through terminal cancer. I am also working on the front line so finding that so stressful, so yes I am 'loving' coming home shutting the door and pretending the world doesn't exist.
Thanks for all the kindness.

puppy "I'm horrified at how small I'm happy for my world to be" - why? Social conditioning maybe?

Scarlett - I run but haven't dared go out late at night in my rough area. I'm too clumsy to run at night really anyway. But it's interesting that you are seeing lots of people. I hope you are okay and can find a way to make things work for you