Who IBU here?

[DaffodillsandDaisies]

I am choosing not to post this on Coronavirus section if that's ok because I feel like there may be a broader section of views here. Just wondering who IBU / if anyone is, in this scenario or what to think really.

Like most people I'm very conscious of Covid19 and have been upping my hand hygiene which I'm always very conscious of anyway. My workplace was temporarily shut down, I am pregnant and I regularly use public transport so I'm taking as many precautions as I can. That said, I'm trying really hard not to worry or get into a panic, because I dont think it will do any good. I'm also unsure if a lot of the media reporting and social media chat is a bit OTT. I recall working in a university when swine flu happened and the same conversations were happening then- although I do appreciate this does seem to be worse. Basically I'm trying to live in a balanced way, being sensible, taking precautions but also listening to the measured advice of experts and knowing that this could not be as bad as some are predicting. I have seen a senior consultant obstetrician as part of my antenatal care and they were very measured about it all and told me not to worry.

On the other hand, my 50yo brother is very worried indeed and I'm not sure what to say to him or whether he's taking things too far. Our mother is in her 80's and lives in a rural coastal area, with our father who is in his 70's and a bit more fit and healthy. Obviously she's on our mind as she's naturally vulnerable, and she is aware and taking precautions. If she got Covid19 it may well be fatal, as is the case with most octogenarians, although this could also apply to other infections. My DB is talking about if the worst happens and we have to go to her village and organise a funeral it could be a nightmare because the government is surely going to stop all public transport and we don't own cars (as we both live in a city). He said all the hire cars will get block booked in advance and we'll be stuck in our city with no way to move anywhere. He also is worried because his 7yo son lives with my DB's ex wife in a neighbouring county and the ex wife is obese. DB thinks she would be at risk because of her poor health and that, again, if the worst happened he would need to take full care of his DS but would be unable to travel to where is son lives and collect him / look after him because if the transport shut downs.
I've heard of transport shutdowns in Wuhan, and I know the government's 'contain' plan potentially involves temporarily stopping large gatherings, but do people think the stopping of all public transport and the subsequent restrictions for people without cars is likely? I feel like my DB is over worrying to an extent. I'm the pregnant one and I feel like I'm less worried than he is! He disagrees and said that he is simply planning ahead. But he did say he's been "very very worried".

What are people thoughts on this? AIBU to think it won't come to that?

I was with you until the point where you said it's fatal for most octogenarians. The figure I read was 14% for people in their 80s, which is a considerable risk, but it isn't most by any means.

Now your brother has taken the baton and kept running with it. Planning a funeral in his head, while it may seem practical, it's taking things far too far. There are so many unknowns in this. He needs to stop now. I'm in a similar situation re elderly parents in an isolated location, but I'd put a flea in my brother's ear if he started talking like that.

Whatever @Boire. You didn't need to invest your energy in a response.

None of us 'needs' to invest energy on a pointless thread about hypothetical funeral scenarios, no. Be kind, won't you.

@snoozyLou I completely agree. I think most people (myself included until earlier today) are assuming it's a death sentence for our older relatives. Their chances are still 85% survival which, although not ideal, is certainly not certain death as we have all been catastrophising

@SnoozyLou I believe I said "it might well be fatal" for my mother and that was the case for other 80 year olds. Not quite the same thing as you think I meant, but I fully accept I didn't phrase it very well.

@Boireannachlaidir and yet you take the time to come on and post snide remarks to someone. My brother may be funeral planning in his head but I am not, as you will have noted if you'd absorbed what I actually wrote instead of leaping to the attack.

Sorry snoozy I don't know why the app is posting twice.

@DaffodillsandDaisies I think it was the use of the word 'most' that implied you meant most of them lol

I'm old and I've got underlying health issues. I say this to reassure you that I have some understanding of your brother's point of view.

However, years ago in a train g course, the trainer talked about the difference between areas of concern and areas of influence. Put basically, in theses particular circumstances, my area of concern are similar to your brothers. But there is sod all I can do about most of it.

My area of influence, is those things I can do something about.

So I only worry about those things I can influence. Like does everyone I live with understand the importance of good hygene.

The other stuff I leave to chance and plan some contingency measures, where practical and do able.

@DaffodillsandDaisies I can completely understand where you're coming from. It is scary stuff - and even 15% is a big risk to me. Sorry if that came across the wrong way.

But your brother needs to calm down. Hypothesising to that extent won't do anyone any good - particularly not you or him.

I was unable to put my brothers fears to rest because I didn't have any concrete facts. Haven't found anything online and I read newspapers everyday.

Flip it round. You can't prove a negative. Where is your brother's evidence that there will be a transport shutdown? If he thinks it might happen, how likely on a scale of 1-10, compared with the sun rising or being hot by a bus? What does he want to do about it?

Just found out my sister and her husband are self isolating, along with her aunt who lives with them.
They are pulling their two daughters from school.
Intend to use delivery option from supermarkets for food.
I am just waiting to see the fallout from two adults who are never home, basically jailing themselves, wondering just how long they are going to continue this action.