Throw your contraception in the bin and your legs in the air! JS II

[frakkit]

The 'rules'

Maintain a relaxed attitude at all times - drink if you want too, especially on your birthday. Thread precedent dictates if you drink to excess you will get a BFP (but not recommended)

Covet thy husband and enjoy every minute. Shag at ever opportunity - shag-capes and awesome superpowers optional.

Resist the lure of ovulation predictor kits, Taking Control of Your Fertility and the dreaded First Repsonse. Knowing where you are in your cycle is entirely permissible though!

Going to the doctor is permitted if you've had a stupidly long cycle but beware of the dildo-cam-scan.

Keep acronmyage to a minimum! EWCM is now to be referred to as 'pant snot'.

Keep us up to date with gossip!

................................

The list (if you haven't posted since the last one you've been scrubbed - you're welcome to come back though)

Tanmu82 - BFP
PrivetDancer - BFP
OnlyWantsOne - BFP
Frankenfanny ? BFP
Notso - BFP
knittakid - BFP
loopeylu - BFP
PinkFondantFancy - BFP
Grannyapple ? BFP
Fuzzywood - BFP
canoe - BFP
janedoe - BFP
StarflowerGirl - BFP

Frakkit ? JS
BrassicaBabe - JS
takethatlady - JS
vallinnapod - JS
Gormers ? JS
Pipistrello - JS
MrsWajs - JS
RedNinaBlue ? JS
alien82 - JS
takingtheplunge - JS
almostknockedupgirl - JS
cowboylover - JS
swizzlestar - JS
HarderToKidnap - JS
Miffles - JS
milanomum - JS
fyimate - JS
lovemylulu - JS
haplesshippy - JS
Halliegirl - JS
Williamsmummy1986 - JS
ljg72 - JS
30andMerkin - JS
trixie123 - JS
bringbackwham - JS

I'm sorry if I missed you - please add yourself!

Hello my lovelies.

Yet more confusing periods for me. After a lifetime of completely normal and unremarkable cycles, as soon as I want a baby they go crazy!

Last weekend, had a bleed a few days earlier than period was due. Lasted a day then stopped. Nothing for 3 days. My ?implantation bleed heckled went up so did a test - negative. 2 days later, period starts, a couple of days late but otherwise normal. Too confusing!!!

I can cope with not being pregnant, but wish that my body wouldn't play tricks in the interim!

Oh well, back to the shagging board!

Hi Ladies, it's been ages since I've been by, life got kinda hectic for a while there. So....I'm looking for a pick me up here if you can, one of my bestfriends just found out she's pregnant, she's still breastfeeding her son and hadn't even had her first period since giving birth to him and bang - pregnant! Silly to be jealous I suppose - but there you go. Think it's going to be hard seeing her get bigger.

I'm currently on CD 22 of a 25-28 days (been 25 days the last three months) cycle. So I guess if AF doesn't come by 20th or so I'll do a test. Not holding out much hope this month though, think it's on it's way. Blegh.

Anyway, I'm off to read back through the thread, I reckon it's garunteed to give me a good giggle :-D

OMG day 14, I think I'm ovulating and wow am I moody/petulant/generally tantrum filled!

This isn't going to get any shagging action unlike yesterday when we were having people over drinks and managed a quickie literally just before they arrived! Is it wrong I spent most if it glancing at my watch and expecting the doorbell to go?! Maybe it did the trick though cos DH ain't getting any tonight.

Hello ladies (loving the new name frak ).

CD 4 for me and what a weird period! 3 days of spotting them kaboooom super heavy period. Worst PMT in yonks. 2 days bleeding and it's all over.

Have just bought some cheapie preg tests off the internet, buggered if I'm spending 8 euro every month. Got 10 of those little strips for 14 euro p&p.

Very hot here but now AF is dying off I'm beginning to feel a little more like donning hte shag cape.

Hope all is well with everyone...have I missed any big news/BFPs?

After eating to much for dinner I have a very nice babybelly on me. To bad it's all dinner and no belly! (resolves to get the walking shoes out again tomorrow)

Pant Snot has arrived, and while I'm excited it finally has a name I'm pretending it's not happening as it's all going to waste. Bring on Tuesday!

Have a lovely weekend shagging all x

Hi Ladies, cd11....shagging cape has been put to good use, but now I have spotting and sore boobs. I'm hoping my period isn't coming back on and don't think it can be implanation bleeding as I don't normally ovulate until the cd14?!

Bleurgh!

Watching "16 and Pregnant" on Living

16: Mum! I think my waters just broke
Mum: Lets have a look
Mum: Yeah, that's what it looks like....And that's what it smells like

I repeat - Bleurgh!

Just had to share

Hiya, I poas yesterday to try to figure out my awful symptoms. I had started sprouting Gallagher brother style eyebrows in the last 48 hours. So, seven sticks later and I was convinced that I'm definately pregnant.
Walked aroung my house for ten minutes saying "Oh my God!" alot. We're really happy though. I was told because of my PCOS I would need help to get pregnant so it's very much a suprise that we managed it ourselves.

Baby dust and cyber vodkas for all.

OMG for you!! and yey & congratulations!!!

Whoo-hooo! CoraBear
Bet c'ha can't wait to tell your -D- SiL

Ooo,oooo,oooo!!
I have developed eyebrows like a Gallagher!
'Onest Injun! Noticed before!
And I was sick the other night for no apparent reason.
(not like you though)
And I keep getting odd twinges in my inside lady garden area.
(t'wirly for R2D2 pains)
And erm... My right arm pit and buzzwam keeps being stabby
And, and, and, despite lack of pant snottage I did do some extra JS when my ipod went all shouty and ordered me to.
< nods sagely >

I am 7dpo and in need of a slap around the chops.

< twirly fingers around the Gallaghers emoticon >

Congratulations corabear (though I didn't know a monobrow was a pregnancy symptom! Sounds like you've got nine months of plucking ahead of you!)

Loving the £80 shagless booty call!

DH is back from China. He got back last night and we had some friends round, so he walked in from a 14-hour flight to find eight very drunk people having a hula-hoop competition in his living room

He didn't mind though. He joined in and then when they all went home today he shagged me twice . Yay for double-dipping!

prettyvacant really?! You've got the preggo-brow too? Time for a little test, methinks?!

Good work Corabear!

PrettyVacant had to read your post twice. Thought you'd been on Cora's vodka for a moment, then twigged what you were saying. Sounds like you need a good POAS!

Actually good work to TakeThat too actually. PMSL at your hula hooping.

Thanks everybody. Very exited. DP's going away for the next week so we're trying to get organised with doctors appointments and such.

Seriously, definite monobrow grew over night and so so sore to pluck it. I think it should be the number one symptom for preggy spotting. Just hoping I don't sprout a 'tache overnight too. I'm gonna need a friggin weed whacker by the end of 9 mths.

I definately think you should test Pretty Vacant. I was thinking I might tell DP's parents on his sisters birthday.(Insert evil laughter).

Yay takethat and your rampant ways. Slightly jealous of your hula hoop-ing. Will definately be doing that at my next Broke-and-Old party.

DO IT!!! Cora is she having a memememe partay!
< joins in with evil laugh and twirls mini mono >

Noooooooooooooooooooooo.
Can't test yet!
That would be crazy

R2D2 due to land Mon
Calm down, calm down next Monday
Boooo!
I'm just being uber menkul, ignore,ignore.

TT lovin the hula foreplay.

NoMoreChoc (can I call you that?)
Sorry bout me, I'm a little hornymonal atm.
I'm usually as sane as a box of squashed frogs.

Don't worry PrettyV if I had a possible baby monobrow, I'd be going a bit loopy too. Instead am sporadically lunging away from the computer to jump on DH. He's being no fun though.

(PS yes you may. It's a long name to type)

argh so much to catch up on! Loving sneezing vag's though

yay congrats to cora! TEST Prettyvacant...do it do it

we christened our new kitchen table this afternoon during ds's nap...it's a fold down jobbie from Ikea, I am going to have to loose weight before we attempt that one again.

SO, last period was 1month and 3 days ago....one before that was god I've no idea, maybe 2 months? With DS I was still getting BFN when apparently 5 weeks PG...when do I test?!

Every party is a memememe party for her. Even when it's not her birthday!!! God, I'm feeling mega mean tonight.

DP is slagging me that I might be having twins. He had to cut, yes that's right CUT!, me out of my trackky bottoms. I put them on this afternoon coz I can't bear to wear jeans at the moment and I was slobbing around the house. So, went to go to the bathroom, for the 700th time today and I couldn't pull them down. The big thick elatic waistband wouldn't stretch anymore so rather than piss myself I had to get him to cut through the elastic. Tbh they're soo comfy now.

Cora isn't being preggers soo sexy? PMSL at you right now.

Twins you say?
PMSL too at the trakky bottoms OctoMummyCora

GWTMH blardy hell! You lot have long names You saucy Mouse you!

So do you lot know of a POAS that will tell me that I'm updiffed possibly before implantation.
Tomorrow? I think?
I think it's a leetle early innit?
Don't cha have to be at least 12dpo?
I'm not into early testing tbh.
Not so keen on spending 12 quid on a piece of plastic that will invariably mock me shouting BFN!!

Don't mean to bring you all down but if I do get a BFP I will be shittin' it.
My history 'aint preedy.
I've done this six times before and you'd think I'd be an expert but as this is actually the first month since Nov we've been officially JS with intent I seem to have completely lost the plot!
I'll just see how the ClearBlue monobrow progresses for a week.
Bear with me.
I'll be good next month I pwomise.

Just read fred back and Cora tested waaayyyy before droid due.
AAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGHHHH!
What are you doing to me!

Prettyvacant I just did a first reponse and then followed that up with another one and then two clear blue digi ones. And then a random test I found in my drawer.

I don't know how the tests work really, surely they need the egg to implant for that hcg to be produced. But by my maths (they are very dodgy),I would only be implanting today. I have read and re-read the instructions on all of the kits but they are fairly shady about how they get their positives. I get easily baffled by science.

If you don't feel like testing, I think you should leave it. There's no point in freaking yourself out. And besides, it's really such an expensive wee, all of mine yesterday cost me £30.

Well, the preg tests work by measuring HCG, which only starts to rise after implantation. You must have ov'd early corabear.

And you can get the tests 50 for a fiver on ebay. I'm steering clear cos they send me doolally but if you can trust yourself not to turn into a raving test-tampering nutjob like me then it's worth it!

I think we need frak to calm us down.

Sorry to change the subject but I just re-read the thread and saw brassica's post about smelly breaking waters! That's almost enough to put me off the whole babymarking thing...

Right, back to the hula hoops! (I said almost )

babymaking. Babymarking is a whole other thing ...

I am addicted to 16 and pregnant, I saw that episode with the breaking waters. They look horrendous. Like some tipped minestrone cuppa soup all over the bed. (TMI maybe).

My vag never sneezed this month. Crap. Maybe I've been pregnant for longer than I thought. Gonna make a doctors appointment to sort out my dates and get a referrel and all that stuff.