30s TTC Inc: Rolling out BESH practice across our flagship monthly diffment projects - Blue Sky thinking for a paradigm shift vis-a-vis droids and wooden spoons.

[Muser]

We're getting serious this time BESHies. Welcome to the Palace, where the emphasis is on sophistication. Cast your eyes over the plush carpet, admire the oh-so-carefully worn leather armchairs with sidetables and little green lamps. We have the Bonds of the ages as barstaff, waiting to serve martinis and the finest champagne.

To your left you'll see the Pit, which hopefully we won't be needing much. To your right the Cave of Gloom, and straight ahead we have our special space for the 2WOOFL. You'll find beanbags and gym balls there, the walls have been specially painted to allow you to write your symptoms up and wipe them off if they disappear. It's all the rage for Blue Sky thinking these days. And there are donuts and coffee to keep you going as you try to shift that paradigm.

Oh Cass, hugs and prayers for you all.

Cass, I'm not religious, but am sending your Grandma lots of love and peacefulness and more love to you and your family. Being with her loving daughter and granddaughter in her last hours, if they sadly are, will be of the greatest comfort to her. My thoughts are with you

I feel so bad that we left her. She wasn't conscious, at least not any way we could tell, but what if she was/is and we've just left her to die alone??? My Mum wanted to leave and she was my lift; the home is 30 mins drive away. But now I feel dreadful.

Many people of that generation prefer to die alone, as it is a matter of dignity to them and also, she will probably pass away when in her sleep, if she does (sorry to be blunt, but is true), so it's not practical that you could be there if that is what happens. Don't beat yourself up - you have done all you can for her and her last memories or sense, if she is very 'out of it', will be of the love of her family. Just hearing the sound of family voices and the touch on her hands will have been immensely soothing to her, whatever her state. She must be so proud to have such a loving Granddaughter

Oh Cass I'm so sorry to hear about your nan. Thinking of you and your family. x

GinnyGinGin I'm sorry to hear the menkulling is, well, menkul. Entirely understandable but shit that you are going through it. Big smooch me luvver.

Aries I think it was you who asked about my labour with Boo... It wasn't a walk in the park, and it wasn't the birth I planned (hippy shit water birthing, candles and meditation etc) but I got through it without pain relief and believe me, I have such a low pain threshold it is a joke... I did tear a bit but that hurt for just a second and I took full advantage of the gas and air for the stitches. And you know what? I'm actually looking forward to doing it again! I think Gin has said the birth is actually such a small part and she was right. The memory of it fades quickly because what comes after is so much bigger and more important.

Ok, will stfu now.

I am crossing all body parts for the wooflers. Go Occers Lorry Cass and Aries. Is anyone else quietly menkulling away? Own up now!

Scorps there is a little summat in post for ya.

I've told you before, Polly, women who've not gone through labour can't use that size of dildo...

Oooooh, excited! Is it jewellery? Roses? Love poems? (feel guilty now cos never sent you owt. And am not a stingy git in RL, neever ). Fanks so much

I heart you

Thank you for your kindness. As I hit post the phone went - she's gone.

Cass, sweetheart, I'm so sorry for your loss. I'll be thinking of you. Tons of love.

I'm so sorry Cass. Really sorry. And especially after your lovely holiday. It sounds as though just slipped away peacefully not aware of much, but if she'll have been aware of anything, it was you and your mum's love for her. And I'm also sorry no one was up and around last night for you when you posted. They would have answered you straightaway if they had been.

Lots of love xx

I'm so sorry lovely.

So sorry Cass, but also thankful that the last thing your Nan knew was the love and care of you and your Mum.

Oh Cass I really am so, so sorry for your loss. You sound like you had a very special relationship with your Nan. I know when my Granddad passed away the grief was awful. But as time has passed I constantly remember the happy, fun & downright hilarious times I had with him. I hope that in time you can remember your Nan in the same way. My thoughts are with you & your family. Be kind to yourself, x

Aries thank you for asking the labour question that I was trying to steer the guts to ask. And thank you to gin & polly for telling us about your experiences honestly but calmly. I think people are more likely to tell the horror stories & aries if you're like me they're the ones you focus on. I'm sticking to the myth scientifically proven fact that large feet = simples birth. I have size 7 clod-hoppers, size 8 if I buy cheap shoes. So definite polite cough & baybee will be out for me.

Scorps yes, yes, I know you'd never forget my 2WOOLFing . Today is CD31. Last 3 months that has been the length of my cycle. Took temp again this morning & has remained on the higher side of all over the shop. Don't feel like droid is about to appear (but rarely do), also don't feel diffed (whatever the hell that feels like).

I'd also like to tell everyone to stop imposing deadlines on yourself. I did that for my birthday, Christmas, the boyf birthday, etc etc. I think the best was we had an expensive holiday just before we started TTC as it would be the last one we had for a while. That was 3.5 years & 4 more expensive holidays ago!! Bunch of arse. I'm now fast approaching 38 & start of year 4 of TTC. Fuck, now that's depressing.

Anyhoo, big congrats to cunty - fab, fab, news. Am off to stalk the Deli crew & send love to ski. She hasn't had the easiest time of it, has she?

Mallets mallet smacks on the bonce to everyone.

Thanks all for your lovely kindness. I shut the computer down straight after my post last night Aries so don't worry about the late hour, but you're lovely to think of it.
Cried a lot last night but this morning am just thankful it's over for her.

Re: labour stories. I feel a bit bad now for mentioning the whole thing; I only really did it in a comedy melodrama kind of way. FWIW, the reason I ended up with the emcs and haemhorrage was because he got stuck in an awkward position. I was bluelighted in as had been trying for a homebirth . So it didn't end up how we'd hoped, BUT two things:

1. The actual labouring part wasn't too bad at all. I mean, it hurt, yes, but gas and air was a marvellous thing and you're in a completely different headzone where time doesn't mean anything so you don't actually really notice how long it's going on for, and
2. When I arrived at the hospital, they were all over it, and everyone was very kind, and efficient. And the epidural they gave me was The Best Feeling I Have Ever Known

So really, please be not afraid. It's never going to be the easiest experience but it's DOable.

Oh! I had forgotten the big feet thing Lorry. I too have size 7s, and MrA is only a (small) size 9, so I'll also be fine. It'll be easy!

And Cass, you're going to feel very sad and cry a lot. You will. But it gets easier and you remember happy times. Awful cliche, maybe, but that's because it's true. Take care, poppet.

Oh Cass. I'm so very sorry to hear about your Nan. But I'm glad you were back from holiday and able to see her just before she passed on. Sending you a huge cuddle and no violence whatsoever xxx

(We have all gone so soft recently. I like it )

Dear Cass, very very much love to you and your whole family. XX

Cass so sorry to hear about your Nan. I hope she passed peacefully in her sleep with thoughts of her lovely family. Big hugs darlin'.

Hugs and squeezes to you too Lyra. How are you doing my lovely?

Frozen fishslaps, chinese burns and mojitos for the rest of ya.

Lorry you sound v relaxed this month... therefore I declare you diffed. And for what it is worth, I didn't feel diffed for ages. In fact, I still don't most of the time, until I catch sight of my expanding girth.

I am off radar for a coupla days so if there are any BFPs then Scropes plz can you text me? I don't like to miss out you know...

Laterz biatches.

Aries my boyf too has small size 9 feet, so this birth mallarkey will be a doddle for us!!!

My mum said it was on the news over the weekend that a heavily diffed woman was at Glasto, went into labour, gave birth, then came back for the rest of the festival! Not sure if that's amazing or pure craziness.

Polly I do feel relaxed this month. I actually have to stop & count what day I'm on. I think the boyf is more anxious this month as he keeps asking me what day it is & I look at him daft as I say "Wednesday?" thinking its a trick question. Honestly I was so worked up about Glasto that consumed all my thoughts, suddenly its over, I'm home & the end of my 2WOOLF is here - one way or t'other. So if this month isn't to be I'll have to arrange holidays & trips for every 2WOOLF hereafter.

Wherever you're off polly have a good few days.

Cass please don't feel bad about bringing up the labour stories. 1000 people could tell me it would be fine, but I'd focus on the 1 small sniff of a nightmare story. I hope you're taking things easy today.

gin my lurve, how are you today?

head welcome back to the menkalness that is TTC!!

Vodka jelly & hash fudge all round.........

Cass, so sorry about your Gran. But it sounds like she slipped away in her sleep after spending precious time with people she loved and who loved her. It's sad and seems so unfair when anyone close dies, but if there's a 'good' way to go, she had the best that anyone could hope for. I've lost 3 of my Grandparents, and we were super-close to them all and the pain was (is) just awful, but as Loz says, the funny, happy, wonderful memories win through and never, ever leave you. Big, non-pervy hugs to you

Lyra, I like the softness too Call ourselves proper Scorpios?! Big smooches to you too; hope you're all doing okay at your end

My fingers are poised over the touch screen, Poopy. I have my eye on that there DHLaurie too. Will miss ya

Yes, PortaLou, am watching. Temp still high on due droid day? I like it, I like it. Want you to win SO much. But don't want you to feel pressured, either. I felt weird at the weekend cos everyone had been 'Scorp to win' and then I lost - I loved the support but then felt like I'd let everyone down! Twat that I am.

That's NOT a criticism, BTW, I loved the cheering squad and want it always

PS Big feet = easier birth, you say? I have embarrassingly big feet for a midget (6-7, depending on shop). And TYF takes a size 12*, if that's a factor. I really will just cough Teh Baybees out!

*I know what you're all wondering now and the answer is yes

Yes, he does find it hard to find shoes to fit. What else could I mean?

scorps PortaLou

Don't get too excited, honestly. High temp means nothing as my charts are all over the place. Its also a bit optimistic to say droid due today as I've had cycles from 28 - 44 days.

Its odd, I kind of feel like I've accepted its just never going to happen for me. Will be one hell of a shock if it does .

BESHies, hallo!

Have been useless and haven't checked up in you lot for a little while.

just want to give cass a big squeeze

and to say hi to gingin and cho who I hope are ok? Cos I haven't seen them in the deli...

Also a big bosom smothering for scorps cos I think she needs it.

I am comedically round at the mo, and have less than 3 weeks to go, in theory.... Might take another pic for people to laugh at...

It WILL happen and that's why we get so excited for ya! Want you to win sooooooooooooo much Will try not to make you anxious by being too woo-hoo

Yay, Iggster! I've got me snorkel ready, so please to dive into comedy preggo buzzwams?

I've seen your pics and you look disgustingly slim whilst pg But want more piccies! Always more piccies!

Are you excited? Nervous? Can't believe it's only a few weeks now! GOOD LUCK