30s TTC Inc: Rolling out BESH practice across our flagship monthly diffment projects - Blue Sky thinking for a paradigm shift vis-a-vis droids and wooden spoons.

[Muser]

We're getting serious this time BESHies. Welcome to the Palace, where the emphasis is on sophistication. Cast your eyes over the plush carpet, admire the oh-so-carefully worn leather armchairs with sidetables and little green lamps. We have the Bonds of the ages as barstaff, waiting to serve martinis and the finest champagne.

To your left you'll see the Pit, which hopefully we won't be needing much. To your right the Cave of Gloom, and straight ahead we have our special space for the 2WOOFL. You'll find beanbags and gym balls there, the walls have been specially painted to allow you to write your symptoms up and wipe them off if they disappear. It's all the rage for Blue Sky thinking these days. And there are donuts and coffee to keep you going as you try to shift that paradigm.

Wow, lots of nearly here babies, hope all's going OK with Cunty and Ski.

Hooray for nephewMuse arriving safely. Aries when's your sister due? (or has the baby arrived and I missed it due to not paying enough attention?)

I'm on gussetwatch and so going quietly menkul in the corner. I really hate all this not knowing; what I'd really like is someone to provide me with a calendar saying "you will be pregnant on date x" then I could get on with life till then.

Sis is due in a week or so, Occy. Thanks for asking

Cunty's* FB page would suggest she's coughed that sprog out! YAYYYYY!

Woo! Go Cunty! Thanks for stalkage, Scorpy.

Big loves to all the menkul pregnant ladyeez.

Not that I mean to leave the menkul BESHes out. Sorry. Posted before brain in gear. Smooches all round.

Ockywocky what day are you on? Any signs to speak of?

Ginty I can totally understand the menkul. Sit tight in the corner there, you can sit quietly, we don't mind. We'll bring you gin-based cocktails. I'll even get the first round in meself. Grass skirt?

Nae worries, Humpty - round 'ere, there's only menkul ladeez or menkul pregnant ladeez, so we're all much of a muchness

Am soooooooooooo farkin HOT (sadly only temp-wise). Am in renewed awe of my Mum, who gave birth to my brother on the hottest day e-vah in the UK since records began, back in 1976. Says she was scared the nurse was going to drop him because everyone was pouring with sweat! So props to Cunty, doing it in this weather

Lolz, how's the non-droid situation going? Don't think I've forgotten

Arielthelittlemermaid, hope your sis is doing okay Not long now!

PS Bangers is MIIIIIIIIIINE, beyatches!

Scorps have been pummeling people all day today in the heat. Not fun! But labour, yes, SO much worse! Esp as maternity units are always kept at butterfly house temp at the best of times...

Just making dinner and assailed by sadness. Realised we started trying a year ago. A month or two after we started trying my 40 year old sis announced she was diffed for the third time (straightaway). Ah well says me, I'll soon follow. Then she announces her engagement. Ah well, sez me, will def be diffed by the time her baby comes. He came 3 months ago. Ah well sez me. Will SHORELY be diffed by her wedding. We even talked about not staying overnight as I'd undoubtedly be able to drive us back and it seemed like a waste of money.

Well, the wedding's Saturday. And I suppose I still could be differed, tho am completely without symptom. And we're staying over in the end, so at least if not can get hammered.

I spose.

Dear Gin, I feel all fiddly and anxious, because if you were here I would thrust tea and buns at you until all you could think about would be buns and tea, but 'tisn't an option, internetally speaking. Bloody thing. But I think at least you must not worry about it being a particularly menkul state of mind, because you'd be a BIT sort of airy not to be having these thoughts just now, if that makes sense. Does it? Who knows! It's just I always feel better if I know my anxiety is reasonable, then I don't need to beat myself up about it. Innit. Anyway. I'd smooch you but you're a DHB and I know what's good for me .

I too am wilty Scorpy, and dreaming of a cruise up the Norwegian fjords. I am given to understand that next week, in Devon, where we shall be, it is going to rainy. I mean HONESTLY.

Much love Vicious slaps all round to all. Hope ski is OK. Plus also, I am mentally awaiting a pic of the Cuntlet...hurrah for her!

PS I shall be around here a bit more now because we are going to TTC again, after 2 month break, so, you know. Erm. That's it really.

Hurrah! SheBangsSheBangs is back in town. I look forward to eloquent and insightful posts combined with purest filth.

Cass Those self-imposed deadlines are the worst. I remember hating my birthday last year because I'd so wanted to be diffed by that point.

Now, why haven't you booked your hols when I'll be in Devon, Headcase? (1st week of Aug) Will there be NO escape from the house that hygiene and all human expression forgot?

And YAY for restarting the TTC. Get on board the MSDP - you can sit next to me if you like

cass - But you WILL win. You will, do you hear me?

Dromble - but you are pregnant for this year's birthday, HUZZAH!

Casseeeee, don't put any more pressure on yourself, my love. Deadlines suck.

Headcase - Devon eh? Not Cornwall. I see.

And by the way, Scorps, you can't have everyone.

I am in an argumentative mood this evening, beyatches. Watch out. It's because I'm consumed with anxiety about MrA. He's setting off on some insane adventure, which will have me gnawing my fingernails, nay knuckles, with terror until he's back. Bloody men and their testosterone. It's only good for ONE thing.

Posting this here and in deli too...

cuntyNEWS

Boy, born 4.35am. No name yet... 8lb 7oz.

and she particularly wanted me to mention 'the total amityville horror that is my undercarriage'

erk.

PM not AM. Twat.

Um...after the tales from Cunty, Casper, and of Cass's exploding Joe Mangel along with my cousin's 60-hour horror stories, I'm dying to ask if there's anyone out there whose labour was ok. Obviously not easy or anything, but how was it for you Gin and Pol? The first time? Or shouldn't I ask?

It was alright aries. Was scary as I had to have an emergency cs... didn't really 'do' proper labour but found the cs quite scary as it was unplanned, and I had a bit of a reaction to the anaesthetic...

But honestly, whatever went on that day was only a tiny tiny part of having moocher. After all it's just one day...you've got the rest of your life with the small person...

Hooray for babyCunty! I'm not listening to these stories of labour . Also bemused by these tails of heat, you're obviously keeping it all down south.

Cass I'm cd 26, possibly 8dpo which on previous performance = droid tomorrow. Am officially sick of my rubbish LP. I keep poking my boobs to see if they're hurty and can't decide (so not very then), but my temp has stayed consistently higher than pretty much ever before (not consistent, but no strange drops). I POAS yesterday despite swearing I'd never test early, my excuse was that as it was clearly too early to test positive it was OK . If I make it to Friday it's my birthday and I shall celebrate with a pee stick!

Congratulations to Cunty, hurray hurray

I only really got blue when I was buying the seocnd year's worth of folic acid. I did note at MrM's birthday, that last year I had said he might be a daddy by the next one, which he clearly wasn't, 2 weeks ago.

Hey all. Been at Nan's nursing home tonight with my Mum. Nan isn't expected to last the night. If you pray, your prayers that she would not suffer would be much appreciated.

Can't say lots else right now as all a bit choked up. But thanks for kindness earlier all. Ocky want to talk short LPs with you another day (though obv won't need to as we're both diffed but just don't know it yet so ignore that)

ps my Joe Mangel is a thing of beauty, and I'll thank you all to remember that

Oh Cass, you're poor nan. I don't pray, but I shall hope instead.

Cass my poor love. I sometimes pray a bit. May she have a peaceful night and if the worst happens, a peaceful, painless passing. Thinking of you xx