Continuing conceptions and follicling ahead of Feisty, Fabulous Forty somethings

[rowingboat]

Hello world!

Morning All. Nothing of note to report here. Nice high temp, but no boob action and another bfn. Still trying to be cool about it all, cos I don't even know if I did O...
As for the evap, I really think it is an evap because they are internet cheapies and unless it's obviously pink, I won't think anything of it. When I did the test this am, as the wee went over the length of the test it looked like a pink line was coming up, but it faded as the test dried, so thinking it's definately a neg.

Anyhooo...Rowing, I am very pleased to hear that Barry and Foo-Foo are on board. Relax and enjoy!

Kiwi, sorry to hear you didn't enjoy Agidir.It sounds so exotic. Can't wait to hear about your 13 week scan.The time seems to have flown but I imagine it hasn't for you.How are you feeling?

Well, it is true, a good few of us will know what's going on by this time next week. I know I've been very naughty, testing early, but I've got all these cheap tests and I just can't help it!Will anyone else be testing early?

Rowing Go Barry, Go Foo-Foo .

Hippy thanks for your kind words. What do you mean your bobs feel like someone else's? Bigger, Jordan's. younger and perkier or like they don't fit!

Gum Hope your sis is working out what to do. Any news?

Hairy thinking of you.

Welcome back Kiwi

All the best to all.

No news for me, Aunty Flo arrived last week and spoiled my thoughts of a miracle baby! But yesterday at a church-related event I was in the kids room and a little two year old boy nearly fell asleep on my lap and I think if someone had said, he's yours you can take him home and keep him but you don't get to keep trying for 'one of your own' I would have been very happy! Sop I guess it is a good sign for the old adoption route. We can stat this process on 16th October, which is now just under 5 months away!

Lordy so many typos in that!

It should be boobs not bobs!

and....

So I guess it is a good sign for the old adoption route. We can start this process on 16th October, which is now just under 5 months away!

Afternoon . No news here really either. No af, but then could turn up any day until 27th when I'd be officially late on the basis of longest usual cycles.Not sure if I'll hold off testing till then - the lure of the internet cheapies is getting stronger by the hour.
Gum it's the internet cheapies that give me the evap line when pregnant - I know what you say about colour to the line, but just odd that I only get the grey ones a week or so before I start to getb faint bfps! FWIW I have never got a strong bfp on internet cheapies, even when several weeks pregnant. Will you leave it a few days before testing again, or have you resigned yourself now to compulsive testing?
Rowing How are you feeling today? Did you go for that run? On the lie-in front, I dream of 7.30 am lie-ins . The dds did actually lie in til 7 ish, but ds decidedto wake at 5.30 (not typical) - sod's law!
Kiwi sounds like your hols weren't great Agree, it does sound quite exotic too!Good luck for tomorrow's scan
Italian 16th October doesn't sound that far away at all, you must be getting very excited. They're very lucky to have you .
Still very hot here (too hot for me).May go out later with ds and dd3 to get an iced coffee from the village, as dh is taking older dds swimming. Feeling very lazy in this heat!

Hi All,

Hollo Itaolien, noice to hore from yu.
That little boy sounds so sweet, you obviously have a very maternal air about you.

Deige ooo 7am on a Sunday - wince. Mind you, this stoopid sunshine makes it worse, you get woken up much earlier.
Decided a run was best left until tomorrow so just went for a trip into the city centre and went to the park there.
It was mad here last night, I am a city dweller and live in a docklands type area, where people come whenever it's sunny so they can sit outside by the water. Of course, with it being the first very hot weekend of the year everyone was out all day and by nightfall there were casualties everywhere.
I could hear lots of emotional, drunk er..discussion last night from about 8pm onwards, well into the night.
DP was at work last night and he said there were people out all over the place at 3am, lying around on the common and in the city parks.
I'm hoping they won't be able to continue at this pace and the novelty will wear off/money will run out.

How annoying - I typed a fantastic piece(even if I do say so myself) and then lost it. Now to try to remember what I said...........

Well it was something like this -

diege when will you test, tomorrow??? Go on, go on, go on (Mrs Doyle voice).

Nothing much to report here. What I meant italian about my 'bobs' was that they feel like they're getting in the way a lot. If you see what I mean.

How lovely about the little boy at church. Maybe that has re-affirmed your need for adoption. Shame you didn't get to keep that one but I'm sure there will be one that you do get to keep soon - God willing.

gum sorry about the negative results. What is an evapoation line - I don't know the difference?? (thick face).

rowing love to Bazza and Fu.

Kiwi I cannot believe that you are nearly 13 weeks - how fab. As you know I was only pregnant for 11.5 weeks recently and that seemed to take an absolute age and yet yours had literally flown by. I guess it hasn't for you. Good luck for the scan.

Lets get some BFP's from the shag-fest - come on girls!!!!

Bugger, af has just arrived Feel strangely ok, more surprised than anything as I think, during these last 24 hrs,I really did feel I had real symptoms. With hindsight though, they were very real af symptoms...At least I didn't test though, and will be back in the ttc saddle in July. So over to Hairy and Gum for next weel's test fest
Rowing that does sound an interesting night - we used to get people sitting on our wall at 2 in the morning having a domestic. Was anything juicy said?
Going to console myself with a cream egg and Gb's Got Talent - the best I can come up with I'm afraid. I'll be fine tomorrow,and at least I had a 27 day cycle this month, but am going to fully wallow in my misery for now

diege so sorry honey. She is such a bitch to just turn up uninvited like that. .

27 days is a good cycle length though. I haven't had one of those since last july when i had the coil out.

You go and enjoy your wallow - may I suggest wine and chocolate

Deige, sorry about the old witch turning up. Hippy I like the sound of those boobs from elsewhere! wish mine felt a bit like that.They feel absolutely no different to usual, so I'm resigned to the negative tests.If a positive was to show I'd be really surprised.

I had such a downer of a day yesterday. Partly because I was 9 dpo(I think) and that's when I got a bfp last time; but also due to some stuff going on in the family which left me feeling so disappointed and sad. My parents visited in the morning and they dropped a bit of a bomb on me.It's a long story and I'd be happy to bore you with the details, but only if you ask...And then there's my sister who is all over the place and talks in riddles and I just can't seem to understand lately.She keeps telling me she's made a decision then changes her mind the next day.I can't follow anymore and frankly,I think I've had enough of her soap opera. She's back to the city and I'm glad. When she comes down here she uses me as her counsellor for a week, everyday, then goes back to the city and I hear nothing of her.Grr!
I must sound like a right bitch, but I don't think I have the emotional energy right now.

Enough of my wallowing in self-pity!

Italian, it sounds like you are made to be a mummy, and I hope that adoption process runs smoothly and quickly.

It sound s like you are having lovely weather in the UK? It's just now started to feel like autumn here. We have had the fire going and it has been cold and wet.We're desperate for rain, so that's a good thing, but the grey skies are kind of reflecting my mood.

Argh! I just realised something - perhaps these feelings are Pre-menstrual? Seeings I haven't had a period for a couple of years, I have forgotten what that is like.

Oh no! DS has emptied out my handbag! Better run!

Rowing excited for you!

Sorry about af Diege, and about your horrible day Gum

Waves to all

Morning! Thanks for af commiseration everyone . The chic certainly helped Hippy, though had to make do with a large glass of pepsi max to go with it. Twas only the 2nd month, so was stupid to expect anything really, but boy does the body/mind play tricks! Feel great today (obviously pmt symtoms fading) and am even thinking of not missing out June ttc-ing after all...thing is, I do have hg pregnancies, that have in fact got worse the more children I've had. Having said that, thankfully the worst passes by 11/12 weeks, and I would actually be 11 weeks by time of hols...So, speaking to dh this morning (who'll agree to anything if if means more shag-fests)think I may well be up for ttc-ing again this coming month. Or am I mad? . Just now I';ve started,I can't just stop can I!!!!
Hippy you know the pressure is really on now for your BFP
Gonepearshaped, thanks and hello!
Gumblossom that sounds a really rough day What was it that happened with your parents? (if you want to say).
Well,I must get back to marking exam papers. It's funny to see their panic grow in realtion to the deterioration of their handwriitng when time's up

Hi all,

Gum oh dear, it sounds as if you are suffering from compassion fatigue with your sister. I can see why she would keep changing her mind, but it must be so frustrating for you. Probably, best for her to go back to the city and take time to think on her own. Is the ex-lover still on the scene?
As Deige says, we are interested in what happens to you, so, if it helps, tell us whatever you feel comfortable with.
I think you are having a low day, so take it easy and have a nice hot chocolate and see if you can persuade Charlie to watch a film with you.

Diege my sympathies for AF and for the marking. Now stop laughing at the poor students' appalling handwriting.
I'm not sure what hg is, has it got something to do with the holidays?
The chat outside during the drunken weekend was not very interesting and kind of along the lines of 'but I love you, you cow'', slurred emotively.

Hippy how was the cream egg? I haven't had any this year.

Not much to report here. Still putting off the run for another day, just in case.

Hi Rowing . I have been thinking of you and the little ones over the weekend.
HG stands for hyperemesis gravidarum - ie, severe all day pregnancy sickness.I've ended up in hospital for 3 out of 4 full-term pregnancies (with mmc never had a day's sickness, which made me think there was something afoot)although it was a quick drip-job then home. Meds help, though nothing else did (tried acupuncture etc). So trying to be practical, though think I have decided now to try next month anyway - nothing like tempting fate
Right, I must get marking! Have just scraped someone through,and hoping for a 'good' one next!

diege Yeah i was wondering what an hg pregnancy was as well (my guess = hard going??) Yeah, go on try next month as well - i'll book your place on the shag-fest!

Go on add a bit of extra pressure why don't ya. Is it not like I'm knicker checking enough for you. I will work on the BFP. close my eyes real tight and squeeze and hope AF stays away.

Boobs still feeling odd and have made it to day 23 with no spotting or anything so am hopeful - but trying to be realistic as well - .

gum sorry you are having family troubles. I agree that you should 'bore' us with the details. We'll never meet your family so you know we wont blab anything to them. Go on - unburden away .

Love to everyone else.

hairy & rainbow how are you doing.

curly were you involved in the shag-fest??? Can't remember everyone cos it was dark (oh God Hippy you are taking this way to far!)

alba and jolly and lia Miss you loads - hope all is ok.

Deige, you are my kind of lecturer, I liked scraping through.
hg sounds aaargh, but I always think it means you are just super-fertile with all those hormones flying around.
One of my friends was given the same stuff I had for middle ear when she was very sick., the name of which escapes me.

Hippy how do your boobs feel odd? I'm trying to imagine what they feel like - feet?

I'm a bit tired this afternoon and off to work in half an hour. Wasn't allowed a bath for 48 hours after transfer so am looking forward to having a lovely soak tonight. Aaah!

Hippy, consider my place booked on next month's fest . Fingers crossed, you won't be there (well, not with the 'intent' iyswim!) Would you usually have spotting by now in your cycle?
Rowing enjoy your bath tonight - I think you certainly deserve it! On exam front, there are many scrape-ees this year (don't get me started).Marking is NOT my favourite thing. ON preg front, yes, HG is a nightmare (I have been looking at the HG thread with half-closed eyes and trying not to remember how the breeze from opening the front door made me throw up (and the smell of paper, the door bell ringing...don't get me started it's my pet subject )So I am mad for thinking it would be good to have it on hols with 4 under 9s, but hey I have been bitten by the ttc bug and with drugs(cyclazine or stemital)I should be ok, esp by 11 weeks. Of course, chances are it'll be a bfn for at least the next 6 mths,so should be ok anyway!

Hi Rowing thinking of you

hippy not so great, long story, but I have finally had a drop in HCG (woooot!) but now they are hassling me to have methotrexate, which I don't want to have!

I'm hoping to persuade them to do one more blood test, to show two drops, and then hopefully it'll mean no intervention needed and I can TTC once I've gotten over all this!

wave to everyone x

Rowing - hope you are enjoying your luxurious bath now.

diege - sorry about af appearing, but none of that negative talking about bfn's for the next 6 months now, we want to see how you cope with the hols with hg! Obviously hope that miraculously you have a pg without hg if possible.

Gum - we are all nosey little blighters here, so if it helps to talk about your family, chat away. We are good listeners. Besides if you are pre-menstral you need to talk!

florence - you were another of the weekenders, so how is your 2ww going?

As for me, I am SWI-ing at the moment, I should ov at some point this week anytime from between tomorrow and friday. So I am getting ready to jump on the crazy 2ww caravan.

got to go, got a meeting at our house starting any minute!

Rowing I love a bath too, so enjoy! Hippy have you stayed away from the hpt's? Mine are still totally bfn and temp is dropping, so I'll either get Af on Friday or won't, in which case it will mean I didn't ovulate.I have heard the body can try to ovulate many times before it does when BF. So it remains to be seen.I'll just have to keep up SWI ALL the time! Blimey, that'll be hard(er...difficult).

Thanks everyone for your kind words.I suppose sharing my woes might help me feel a bit less isolated. I'll try and make it brief. Basically, I am one of four kids, and over the years, since having my own children, my parents have proven that I'm not valued in the same way as my other siblings. My other siblings have all had a lot of financial help ( my father has worked very hard over the years and it has paid off financially),and a had a HUGE amount of help with their kids, babysitting etc. I've had very little help in both ways. I think they actually believe their own crap ideas in that they think I'm capable and therefore don't need help (even if I ask). So on the weekend, my parents came to visit ( they live two hours away) with my sister and family because it was their son's 4th birthday. That is why she couldn't come two weeks ago to give me a hand when I needed it ("Oh we'll come in two weeks for J's b/day, so no point coming to you now".
When they came to visit me on Sunday they told me they were going to buy the land my sister has for sale, to help them out. Meanwhile, I have had land for sale for three years.We put it on the market so that I wouldn't have to go back to work while DS is little. My dad knows we are having trouble selling, and he knows things are very financially tight for us. So when he told me about helping her out (again - he once bought a house for her, has done about four different renos to her different houses for her) I just felt gutted.
I know that sounds so selfish and spoilt, but it has just hurt so much that they are willing to help my siblings, but not me. I have felt increasingly abandoned by them over the years and this has kind of done it for me.I just don't want to contact them anymore because I feel hurt.
The saga continues though because I called my sister to discuss it, told her I was upset with mum and dad, and she rang them and told them. So my dad called yesterday to tell me off! He told me I had no right to be upset by him, and that he wasn't favouring, and her land was a sound business investment and mine wasn't (which is actually quite the opposite), and that I should stop feeling upset.My response was that he can't tell me what to feel and I wasn't telling him what to do, that I'd just expressed my feelings to my sister (can't wait to speak with her!
I came away from that phonecall feeling more isolated and abandoned than ever, and I want nothing to do with them now. My mother didn't call to be understanding and show she cared that I was upset. And that's just it, she doesn't ever show she cares and that hurts.
I've had a good cry over it, and now I'm just going to get on with it! Unfortunately things are so tight financially I might have to start looking into childcare for DS, despite having had another year's mat leave approved.I might have to do some relief teaching.

I'm sorry this is so long!It is good to get it off my chest.

Thank you for being such great friends, if I could I'd be sharing a bottle of lovely west australian wine with you!

You know I think part of my upset is that my sister is pregnant and I really wish it were me.I'm not sure whether I want to talk to her, but I suppose I will at some point.

Hi all,
I shouldn't really be on here, because I'm getting DS ready for nursery, but I just wanted to give you a big, virtual hug.
It sounds as if it is just the feeling that you are being ignored that is making you feel so down and the lack of sympathy. I'm sorry your parents aren't being very understanding or supportive, you deserve lots of support and understanding, you are very supportive to all of us and very kind.
The sister thing sounds like a nightmare, I do understand how you must feel, even though you wouldn't want to be in her position (who would) I know you would love another baby and that can't help.
I don't know what to suggest, but you have lost your bounce. Where is the woman who takes the family to the farmer's market and makes a lovely meal. You take lots of care of yourself and don't be hard on yourself, be kind to yourself. You haven't done anything wrong and have done lots of things right.

Hello Gumblossom I really feel for you. That's a really horrible situation to be in, and as Rowing says it does seem that your family aren't being as supportive or empathetic as they should be. While not as extreme, I have a very similar situation with my own siblings and parents, so can understand a bit of what you're going through. Is the pregnant sister the same one as the one with the land? Has the pregnant one decided what to do about her situation yet? I think as you say the pregnancy thing is horrendous and must be so stressful for you - another virtual, non-MNetty hug for you >
Must dash - have to do my last midwife interview then over to the transcribing!
Hope everyone is ok,back this evening xx

hippy what shag-fest?? Looks like I missed out, am at work so just popping in to say hello. Have reached another year today, where does the time go?? Af is late, don't think I will get a BFP when I test this Friday coming, am waiting to be 7 days late before I test.

((((((((((Gumblossom)))))))))))

HI all
Sorry been lurking but not had much to say.

BIG squeeze for Gum. The whole sibling thing is a nightmare. I can empathise. There have always been issshhhhoooos between us 4; more the elder ones, I am the baby. I sort of got roped in to the arguments at various times. then the sister I was always very close to (surrogate mum really as 15 years my senior, and mum died when I was 19) went all odd 2 years ago when my dad died, and said she didn't want anything to do with the rest of us (I was pg with DS). She has only seen him once, and that was unavoidable when we were dealing with dad's estate.... and then she lurks like a bad shadow, and looms over today, DS 2nd birthday by declining my invite to his party this weekend (knew she would) then hand delivering a card with a cheque in this morning (but slipping away unseen), but with a terse "best wishes" signed in the card. LOOK lady, be involved in his life or not. Don't send gifts out of duty because I did for her three (all in their 20s now).....Argh....made me angry and tearful this morning. Sorry, needed to get that out.... Families, they're a bleeding nightmare!!!!!

Lovely to hear from Italian. Special squeeze for Rowing. Good to see Hippy still lowering the tone .

CD2 for me, first month back to TTC after my MMC in March. Here we go again huh...?

Love to all - must go to bed, FAR too late for me
x

Oh Thankyou all so much for your hugs and sympathy.It really means the world to me.

Yes,Jollster, families are a bleeding nightmare! I talked to my sister, who had talked to my parents yet again, and my dad thought our phone call went "well". Blimey, he has NO emotional intelligence if he thinks that went well!

I have decided to step back and leave the ball in their court.For years I have made the contact.They are lousy at calling and visiting.As far as I'm concerned, if they want a relationship with their grandchildren they'll have to make the effort, because I'm too tired now!

Deige, it is the same bloody sister.She's 4 years younger than me and has always been the favourite in a lot of ways. Which is fine, I've never let that come between us, and I won't let this either, but I am a bit sick of it. She still hasn't made a decision about the baby. At least through this she has learnt one very important thing : her lover has made it very clear that he never intended to make a go of it with her, despite what he said, and now wants her to terminate the pregnancy, but has said he'll support the child financially if she has it. I worry that she'll have the baby thinking it'll have a hold over him, but I know he'll never be the support she'll need. She obviously has times when she wants to have the baby, but realistically I think she'll not cope.She didn't cope all that well with the boys she already has, when she had tonnes of support from her DH and my parents. I'm not sure that they'll support her this time.
Her DH is still none the wiser. She talks about having a termination, but she's only 5 1/2 weeks and they won't do it til 6 weeks. Who knows what she'll do? It is hard to listen right now.

My temp dropped again, and I didn't even bother with a test. Especially as I noticed a bit of spotting this am, which means AF is on its way.And instead of feeling sad I actually feel great about it, it means I did OVULATE!! Hurray! So at least now I might have an idea of when the next egg might drop by. It has been a long wait, so I might just have to crack open a bottle of bubbly!

Hippy, what news??
Rowing, did you have that run yet? How are you feeling?

Now that I feel abit out of the doldrums, it's time to start all the supplements etc to ready myself for conception.

WooHoo...conception,pregnancy,birth, baby...here I come!