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[Muser]

Subscribe now for 24 hour buzwamcam footage! Sit back, relax, and admire these 30 something women go menkul during the 2WOOFL. Hot men and cold cocktails on tap.

Aw, queen that sucks. I hate wasted eggs - and had plenty of those... Could you stalk him to London?

So it's been active around here. I see I am not a newbie anymore. Welcome Dcaff. Anyone who outdrugs me while WOOLFing is welcome. I see it is a feature we share since the camping days. A lot less guilt back then is all I remember. Although your crushes both confuse and appall me, I have to say.

Had a party at my place last night. Absolutely knackered. I think I am going to waste my day. Anyone else in time wasting mood?

Mountbatten! NEVER, ever mention the c-word on this fred!!! It is acceptable in the questionnaire but is otherwise a heinous jinx. BESHes have been known to spontaneously menstruate when passing a Millets. If it has to be referred to, then it must be c**mping

Ok. Did someone on the BESH thread actually utter the phrase "at least you know you can get pregnant"? I fecking hate that homily. It deserves maximum violence.

Big fish slaps to cockdigger. Could the answer be someone sneaking up on you? I bet we could arrange a bundle. You'd never know what happened. Although there is the risk of the wrong BESH getting the baster.

Welcome to the nooooobie. I likes your style.

Hello mewshouseinbelgravia you did hear correctly, but to be fair , I think the offender does not frequent the palace, or read the full thread...I think there was also talk of bding...hurl!

Hey Muse, yes, I'm afraid someone did say that - I think she wandered in here by mistake (and indeed she has done so once before). Her next post was to ask "what's a BESH?" We all studiously ignored her and she went away. I imagined her looking like Janet in the Rocky Horror Show, accidently straying into Frank'n'furter's lair, mwah hah hah.

I did notice she does not appear to have returned chochocho. I do not want to be all fred police, but certain things are just not allowed.

Delayed x post Cho!

Wasn't me, wasn't me! I made only one blunder! Well to be fair, although I used the dreaded word, what I refered to was substance abuse in forests which involved absolutely no equipment at all (had to google Millets).

Don't worry Mount, I have made a similar blunder before. I had to be educated about the dangers of canvas. My leg hasn't been the same since.

Can we stop discussing the topic altogether? Today's my Day of Ovulation and I need all the luck in the world! I cannae handle the triple whammy of canvas-based activities, bding or blithe homilies. I want virtual booze, dirty vampire-sex* and lesbotic fisticuffs, thankee very much.

OH, ROCKY!

TYF has never seen Rocky Horror (despite the fact that every time I come in after getting wet in the rain I always say "I'm cold, I'm wet and I'm just plain scared!" and then have to explain why). And he doesn't 'get' The Smiths. He does it just to make me feel old; I can see no other reason for such nonsense. Mind you, he is going through those awkward teenage years

*The word for vampire jizz is 'spoo'. There's something you never wanted to know. I really should keep Mitchell gagged more, but sometimes he does need his mouth free...

I read that as 'lesbotic fisting'

I just had a babyfail cry in Sainsbury's. . . Quick, pass me that there canula and let's get a Tanqueray drip set up . . . [self pitying emoticon] Have decided to cheer us both with a high tea including home made scones and florentines - because nothing says 'peak reproductive health' like refined carbohydrates with a Lurpack garnish.

I just had a babyfail cry in Sainsbury's. . . Quick, pass me that there canula and let's get a Tanqueray drip set up . . . [self pitying emoticon] Have decided to cheer us both with a high tea including home made scones and florentines - because nothing says 'peak reproductive health' like refined carbohydrates with a Lurpack garnish.

FUCKING NOKIA PIECE OF SHIT

Cunty, just let me go wash my hands and arms and I'm all yours...

Headcase, the key to babyfail crying in public is to mutter loudly about hayfever or flu, depending on the time of year. For extra points, I always go and stand by the hayfever/cold remedies and pretend to look through them until I can compose myself. The very fact that this is genuine advice based on things I genuinely do is making me want to cry myself (which would be the 2nd time today - nothing kicks off a weekend like a whole hour (yep) of blubbering to one's long-suffering DP about barrenness and failure and self-hatred. Esp. when it comes after sexings; this is why I let him off for crimes like not liking The Smiths ).

Nowt wrong with home-cooked food made with quality ingredients. Butter is miles better for you than low-fat spreads, etc. Now come here and snuggle on my lap and let me pet you better whilst Cunty is still looking for her industrial-sized tub of ladylube. Poor old chap

Fanks Scorps for that Pixies earwirm. Can I join the general moping? Was meant to go out tonight but really don't feel up to it. Had a lovely visit with my big sis and am now socialised out. I have 24 bottles of wine in the house. Going to see about drinking some of them. Anyone want?

Fanks ScropRotation . I shall bear that in mind. A lady with a trolleyful of ready-meals gave me a look of great kindness and pity which was more than I could stand.

Shall now read all I have missed and pull socks up. PS: What is 'The Smiths'??

Muse I'm on my way, with a box set of Jonathan Creek (you know you want him) and three packets of Battenburg cake (for me. Get yer own fecking snacks).

GAAAH, BangersAndMash

My fave Smiths song

evening ladies!

Off for another T'n'T - there are at least some good things about having a non-trying cycle. Hugs and kicks to you all.

Found out last night that bigsis is getting married in Vegas beginning of June. Am now attempting to find cheap flights. Failing. I must go!

Good luck Muse. Finding cheap flights anywhere at the moment is a challenge. I wanted to fly to Nantes on business and found out would cost over £300 and would have to gallivant up that there M5 to that Lunnon in the process. But that's probably because of the Euro or something. Must admit haven't tried Vegas lately!
Headcase come here for a black eye. Ker-pow.

Now off to watch the Magnificent Seven

traipsing down to London to jump on the fella is out of the question because 1/ i'm crap and can't face the journey 2/ trains are likely to be on effing strike that week anyway

have had lunch today with a friend who is having it much harder than me though, tales of two years trying and no luck on the Clomid has made me realise i should stop with the sulky face.

If anyone wants me I'm in the pit. Am not planning on coming out tho,am not good company right now.

Droid was late. Did test,weak +. Was terrified this meant another ectopic as apparently risk is higher after all that happened last time.

Told mr gin thought could be pg,but not about test as I had promised to wait til week past droid so we were less likely to have the hell of weak tests...

And now I'm bleeding,so am losing the pg anyway. And no I very much doubt that it's the sort of bleeding that is 'alright' so please don't try and make me feel better.

Am officially sick of all this

Ginny, I am just so terribly, terribly sorry. Of course you don't want any of that good bleeding' biz (I used it to torment myself before the droid pointed out it had actually arrived).

I wish I could think of summat useful to say bit the whole rotten business is so wretched, and such a mindfuck, that I can't. Good God above, when the most cheerful thing that you can think of is the phrase 'at least it's not an ecoptic' then best to keep yer trap shut

Very unBESHly squeezes and I hope the day's not too foul for you, and you get some calm and rest and Good Things. Then (I have to keep telling myself this) onward to next cycle, when it's Spring (I keep telling myself that Spring will make a difference).