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[Muser]

Subscribe now for 24 hour buzwamcam footage! Sit back, relax, and admire these 30 something women go menkul during the 2WOOFL. Hot men and cold cocktails on tap.

You're too late lorry. after 5 mins of hysterical and tragic yelling,he sat down and ate the whole thing,happily telling me how yummy it was. Tiny mentallist.

Toddler tantrums are tiring at the best of times due to their random and relentless nature,but on a day when you are really low and feeling like shit they are just fucking awful....

Sorry am all . is actually funny how he forgets so fast. I am just having a shit at my job/struggling at parenthood/streaming cold/2 (yes2)coldsores/bad back/no sleep/poorly child/no support network type breakdown.

Am seriously questioning why I am trying for another when I so obviously cannot cope with my life at the moment.

Fuck me think I need to pull myself together! Reckon I'll try n sleep when he naps later...

oc just now he waited til I said 'i'm going to the kitchen to make a cup of tea' (he was playing happily) and as soon as I got up he threw himself on the floor,clutching my leg and sobbing 'cuddle me mummy,CUDDLE ME!!!!!!'

sure ss would have thought I was some sort of neglectful bitch if they'd turned up to see me striding off to the kitchen with a child hanging on to my leg dragging along the floor and crying!

He's always a bit highly strung when poorly but that was just silly. He does get A LOT of cuddles btw.

Fuck,I'm a great advert for parenthood eh? Don't worry I'm sure you lot will all be better at it [selfpity]

What d'ya mean there's no buttered hot cross buns left. I WANT one NOW, I NEED one NOW - WWWAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!! (Is that sort of how it goes, gin?)

Poor you. My boyf has strops which he forgets 2 seconds later. I 'm stewing for hours. Either it'll be good practice for a toddler, or I'll send half my imaginary toddlers life blanking them

What time does the small nap? Hopefully soon, sleep helps everyfink, I say. And ibuprofen. And gin.

I wonder if there's any way in the universe to avoid the clingy toddler phase? I was in a cafe yesterday with Sister in Law and when she went to the till, her 20 month year old who had been perfectly happily playing Boo with her Aunty Aries went rigid with panic in her high chair and started screaming "Mummy, mummy, MUMMY!" Cue much tutting from the blue rinse brigade.

Congrats on the new niece Poo. You mean they didn't call her Poo after you? No, her name is lovely.

I'm facing the fact today that I have no idea whatsoever if/when I ov-ed this month, despite being completely textbook last month. Being skint and of a naturally stingy disposition I don't really want to shell out £90 or so quid for a Clear Blue thing yet. Has anyone ever tried one of those spitty licky ferny things? Does anyone know if they're any good?

Fling!

Mooch isn't like that,he'll happily hang out with anyone! He is just proper crazy. Nuffin as straightforward as being scared of mummy going...

Oh Gin! Even these tremendous 36FF buzwams would have trouble cheering that sad!

I'll douse them in gin for yer. Don't say I'm not a good egg of the first order.

Aries what in God's name is a spitty licky ferny thing?

Oh you know! one of those things you lick and it tests your saliva and if you're in a fertile phase it shows a ferny pattern.

I'll try and post a link, though I'm a cyber-spaz www.peak-nutrition.co.uk/womens_health/fertility/calista_saliva_ovulation_tester.htm

Bimey! I had no notion such gizmos existed!

If I don't win a baybee this month I might invest.

'course not very likely to have won a baybee this month owing to having had sex 1.5 times during fertile period...

lol @ cyber-spaz.

I've never heard of such a contraption either. This month we've gone for broke. I began POAS (of the ov surge kind) on CD 11. Not really sure but think there was a bit of a surge on day 17. Anyhoo, this month we have SWI on CD's 9,11,13,15,17,18 & 19. Am currently on CD20 & fair dinkum knackered & bow legged. Even the boyf asked if I'd finished ovulating yet. How the feck do I know? He's going out with the boys tonight & has already told me he's very tired & can't wait to come home & go to sleep. Think I've scared him off.

Surely I win a prize for trying? A bottom rub would be nice............

Jesus Lorry! Have a medal and a rubber ring to sit on!

Poor OM is in the emergency services, so the chances of us being at home at the same time, and him being a) awake and b) not so traumatised all he wants to do is lie in the bath weeping gently are slender to say the least.

Now come 'ere while I rub yer posterior

Blimey Looby-Lou! You must have a fairly comedy John Wayne-esque walk and if it was me I'd be having to neck gallons of cranberry juice and bicarb. Mr Aries and I really went for it last month (to no avail sadly) and I was puzzled about my hip pain and achey muscles until I twigged. It was then I finally realised I was no longer in my twenties . This month we've just had a couple of duty shaps. Well I might give the licky spitty erny thing a whirl. Can't hurt.

Lorry you have GOT to be updiffed this month, what a show of commitment.

Aries I am on month 1 of trialling CBFM, so can't comment on its efficacy yet, but it is about half retail price on Amazon.

Loving the mental image of the poor beautician.

Evening all, just popping in to say:

Hurrah, hurrah for Minipoo with gorgeous (if slightly on-trend) name

Thanks for asking about my dad, things seem to be going in the right direction and we're taking mum down to visit on Saturday.

Sorry you had such a shit morning Gin, hope the afternoon was better. For some reason I keep wanting to use your real name! Naughty Lyra.

Heart you all xx

Congrats on the weepoo! Glad all is ok with the poosis. And congrats as well to muser on the normalisation.

Agreed sale of our house today, so joining those with something to celebrate. Well, tentative celebrations till it all becomes definite.

Hope you are all ok.

Aries - Well, I know what a licky spitty ferny thing is!

[teacher's pet emoticon]

They're great. Mrs Dodger used one and it gave a definitive result for her, so we always knew when she was o'ing (poor lass couldn't turn an OPK positive so we had to resort to other measures).

Am impressed with the amount of SWIing on this fred. Keep it up girls! I'm considering becoming a SWI cheerleader to keep your motivation up.

missing comma between minipoo and Lyra

Lyra that's really good...fingers crossed. And thanks mate (secret snuggle)

casp woo hoo! Relief!

lorry OUCH! But

everyone else thanks. Had a very uppy-downy day. Am still really low tbh but at least it didn't take 1.5 hrs to get moo to sleep tonight. And mr gin is cooking lovely food. And I am determined to get to bedtime without crying again.

There's a lot of stuff mixed up in this low I think - which is making it hard to get under control. But it will be Fine. (brave,wobbly )

am glad to know you lot are here. Though I do sincerely apologise that you are having to put up with my current Actually Proper Mental and Not in a Fun Way state.

How can I be feeling devastated that I should have a 4 month old baby now and at the same time thinking I am just completely stupid to even think that I could cope with being responsible for small #2 on top of all this???

And how much more 'mememe' could I be?

Ah fuck it,someone just shoot me.

Buzwamssnuggles to Gin.

I've just made up such a depressing Amazon basket that I had to chuck a book in it. CBFM pissy sticks and toothbrush heads, whoop-de-do.

Snuggles and gin and chocolate all round.

Can I join in? The in-laws are still here (through gritted teeth). How am I supposed to get up the duff with them lurking for a full seven days? Huh?

Sorry one last thing before bed. Doesn't it just wrench your heart more and more every time one of your friends announces she's pregnant? Have just had an email to say my BF is pregnant with number three - first month trying. I know she wanted three and I'm delighted for her, but this is getting harder each time. My sis is due in July. Pol did you cope ok with this? Is it your younger sister who just gave birth? Because for me somehow that's an important thing, that she's younger than me (and prettier with bigger boobs but that's another can of bitterness entirely). I spent the night gulping back sobs when she told me. Maybe another glass of wine before bed will do the trick ...

Hi, been lurking in the pit for a few days i' m afraid, and not ready to climb out.

(Warning: me, me, me post)

last week, my friend had a baby, found out she was diffed a week after second miscarriage...plus my bf announced she was pregnant one month after trying. Obviously happy for them, but it really highlights the barreness, especially when talk turns to what's happening with treatment etc, and chirpy 'I bet you get pregnant before ivf' speculations.

Also I have had a couple of people asking if I've considered adoption if ivf doesn't work. Of course I fucking have but PLEASE don't make me have to countenance the idea that ivf won't work...I just don't have the stomach for it

I have spent the last couple if weeks fighting back tears in public. I think I am going to ask to see the counsellor at my hospital today. I'm supposed to be having iui today, but opks a bit weird- the line got stronger, but did not detect a surge, but now it's going fainter. I am having to pay for this cycle of iui, and I'm worried they will scan me, find out it's too late to treat me, but charge me the full whack anyway, on the principal that 'an abandoned cycle is still a cycle'.

Has anyone got a cave I can move into?