EWCM? BBT? OPK? WTF?! We’re just not using contraception!

[frakkinaround]

So a slightly lighter and less scary thread for those who are chucking away the pills and the condoms and hoping for the best!

Thanks all for the welcome and comments!

takethatlady - I always used to tell the hub I wanted babies when I was hungover I have abstained since coming off the pill but to be honest it was more because during my last pill packed I went on a sort of last hurrah in terms of wrecking my liver! It's our anniversary tomorrow and my birthday next week so this sobriety is likley to be short lived! With everything I guess it's all about moderation (coming from the world's worst binge drinker - in that I am an all or nothing sort of girl, not a fully fledged alcoholic...I hope )

I have never wanted my period so badly! Ridiculous!

Just spent some time looking at a few other threads about conception and have a new mantra.... "must not get obsessed". Also had a look at some other random threads, some people are mean I'm going to stay here with all of the lovely JS'ers after that experience.

Which threads, Fuzzy?

If it was AIBU then yes, they are mean. Here is definitely the fluffy side of the darkness that is Mumsnet.

They were AIBU threads, being new to all this I was just a bit surprised at some of the things people were writing. Will stay on the fluffy side me thinks. How is everyone by the way? AF due in a week so trying to refrain from purchasing any form of stick to pee on at the moment. I will be strong!

AIBU is fine as long as you have a tin hat and a thick skin, don't mind getting flamed/called a troll and don't have a sentimental attachment to every post you make.

People go on there spoiling for a fight so if you're ever feeling pissed off with hte world then that's the place to be.

I wouldn't start a serious advice thread in there, which is a mistake some newbies make. Then you just know it's going to end in tears (and possibly flouncing).

He he - my first post on mumsnet was on AIBU a couple of months back, being (unreasonably) irritable with my DH. People went mad at me! I thought it would be a place to go for a bit of lighthearted grrr....ing and a bit of advice, but it wasn't! Actually, though, it all turned out fine, because I knew I was being unreasonable deep down and once I had that forcefully pointed out to me I admitted it - and then everybody was lovely and congratulating me on handling my first AIBU roasting with good grace!

So choose your AIBUs wisely, if at all!

Five days from AF, I reckon... looked at First Response today in the chemist. Held off! [pats self on back]

Oh Take That - you're a better lady than I am. I gave in and bought a first response test today - 5/6 days off expected AF date!!! I even knew I was being stupid but for some reason bought it and tested! Needless to say it was negative! If I act this flippin mental whilst not pregnant I fear for the onset of pregnancy hormones on my brain!!! I'd be annihalated on the AIBU thread!

And it sounds like you've got it with regards to our favourite egg-based acronym!! Think I preferred being a NADUTA!!

Hello vannilla - no words of wisdom re the pill, but hope you enjoy JS like the rest of us!

Oh no gormers - NADUTA? That's going to take longer to crack (excuse the pun).

I am also 5/6 days from genuinely being able to test - I'll think of you every time I look at the tests and try to stop myself, and you can do the same! (This won't work, I know...). But fingers crossed for you
Hopefully we'll both be chuckling over BFPs soon and we won't ever have to learn another acronym.

I'm off to have some and hot chocolate in a last ditch attempt to finally get rid of the hangover...

Newbie And Don't Understand The Acronyms? Still haven't worked out the first one. Take That, hope the hangover goes soon.

Hi folks-hope everyone had fab BH w/e & welcome new folks!

Well I really must stop eating for Britain! Needless to say my belly is hurting from over eating! And I'm going on hold at end of this month-will never fit into cossie at this rate!

AF due early next week & can't wish it away quick enough. Don't think I am pg despite constant symptom spotting-faintly tingly nipples, odd cramp here & there, tho that could be from the over eating!), but now just want to get back to 'JSing'. Should be mega fertile time whilst away on hols (if I can count properly!), so hoping the relaxation will help us a long a little.

Ooh good luck grannyapple - that sounds like a perfect recipe for success!

Having one of those amazing days where the hangover is gone and feeling normal just feels so amazing.

Also gave in and did a test this morning (AF not due til at least Sunday - not even sure my cycle really is 28 days). BFN, obviously...

Well, at least I remembered to take it!

Howya folks?

Def not pg, having tests afterall, but found myself googling "trapped wind, early pg symptom" yesterday! Thought you might appreciate the confession!

Have fun granny. JSing plus hols sound like a great forumula!

Testing at CD25 takethat? Dafty.

brassicaabe I think there's a few of us 'dafties' on here!

This is first official whole month of trying, and have found that the 2 week wait thing is going to be my mental undoing!!

Going to watch American idol now, but only after I've bought a few shares in First Response!!!

Oh, and fuzzy - spot on with the acronym!! Bot so much of a naduta after all!

Think I may join you in that glass of wine (small one though as I can't give up hope for this month yet!!)

SOMEONE SLAP ME WITH A WET FISH! QUICK!

Not only have I bought a thermometer but it came with some early PG test strips...so I did one...despite two recent BFNs...and no sex since the last one...in fact no sex for 2 weeks as hub been working away...of course it was another BFN (otherwise we'd be celebrating the next messiah!)

Why? I am a reasonably intelligent, rational person normally. This JS lark messes with your head!

OK, mental episode over (I hope!)

PS - pls don't banish me to the scary threads!

Hello, any old-timers left around here or have you all shagged yourself into happy oblivion??

Back, and a bit blue tbh. Negative last month, although to be frank it would've had to be a near-immaculate conception, and we've both been in such a pissy mood with each other I reckon it's been one of our dryest months ever since. That's what happens when 2 ridiculously hyper-competitive people 'fail' a test.

And yes I know a Positive was probably a biological impossibility. And yes I know it can easily take a year. And yes I know we're supposed to be taking it casual. BUT I think we've both been a bit disappointed about how things are turning out, and that we haven't magically embarked on a 24-7 romantic shagfest, and instead have had a charming argument full of guilt and recriminations, which is now lingering on and preventing us from having yet more sex.

Gah!

The thing with this TTC thing is that it's really very slow, isn't it? There can only ptentially be any exciting new developments every month or so.

I'm glad that I am being distracted by super-busy time at work. A couple weeks ago I had too much time on my hands, and used it to surf on MN which made me broody. Now, after two weeks of busy hell, I am feeling delightfully unfussed about the whole thing.

slaps, wine and chocolate all round

We all go through it - or at least I'm recognising the cycle here.

Desperately hoping to be up the duff despite it being a near impossibility - check
Repeated testing, despite repeated negatives - check
Major argument and sulks over not conceiving first time (also highly competitive in this household) - check
Sex gone off the boil as a result - check

HOWEVER I have good news if you're all following my example (and it sounds really obvious when I say it but couldn't see the wood for the trees) the only way you're going to make a baby is by having sex and the more sex you have, the better your chances are and the more your DH/DP will feel super-studly and up for sex So put those grumps away, stop being the bitch-wife-from-hell (me, last month) and just shag

I think it's normal to be all excited, feel down that you've 'failed', grump at each other and then get it back together. At least it seems to be normal on this thread...

Another theory: if you stop mentioning TTCing then they stop noticing (until it's testing time). Or is it just my DH with the failing short-term memory?

Thanks frakkin, I think I've been joining you on the bitch-wife-from-hell theme, although frankly my DH has been utter-nob-from-plonkerdom too!

The only difference here is that it's DH who is apparently stealthily keeping track of dates, and therefore seems very put out when I'm not jumping on him at the appropriate time! I have tried pointing out that a little more romance is likely to increase his chances....and make it more fun in the meantime!

Self-confessed dafty checking in...

30andmerkin your DH sounds hilarious! I've never heard of this level of commitment from a man before! Perhaps he's sex deprived and he's just hoping it's his chance of a shag??!!. Mine's somewhere in between - he doesn't really 'get' the fertile dates or anything, and he doesn't seem to mind me having gotten drunk, but he keeps trying to stop me having cups of tea because he thinks the caffeine will stop us conceiving, and he checks about five times a day whether I've taken my folic acid or not, and tells me I'm not taking it seriously enough if I haven't. He's definitely enjoying the JSing though, so I'm trying to focus on how fun it is to ttc, and ignore the waiting. Both competitive and totally impatient, me...

Here's to washing it down with wine, brassica. We've all been there

You guys are great! I def feel at home here now! I "second" and "third" everything you've said above!

It seems we are all sensible, rational, intelligent women prone to occasional (though to regular and sustained )madness!

30's "that's what happens when 2 ridiculously hyper-competitive people 'fail' a test" particularly rings true for me. I'm more cross that my body isn't obeying than disappointed about lack of baby at this stage.

I've had my blood test results back today. They've confirmed I'm not ovulating. But the GP was able to book me an appointment at the fetility clinic there and then! So while I'm disappointed I'm pleased that an appointment has already been made. DP booked in too for a "relationship with a cup" experience because the GP refers us as a couple so the clinic then knows exactly what they are dealing with.

I'm def staying here though as some healthy JSing is needed to keep me grounded!

BB

Not tonight tho... there's an election to watch! And I don't think I could live with myself if by PFB was conceived on the sofa with Jeremy Paxman and a swingometer in the background....

(and yes takethat, he is woefully shag-deprived. Altho frankly that's partly his fault for having a hobby that sees him getting up at 6 on a weekend, and disappearing for weeks on end. Hurrumph!)

MY PFB, obviously

Brassica I know this is totally un-MN and very against the rules but have a hug. Am really to hear your news but I guess you have a definite answer now and can start to work with what you know.