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Original poster

The BESH 30's TTC: "Shall I get me rat out, Doctor?"

998 replies

ChoChoSan · 02/02/2010 16:14

The Palace is open and the anti-freeze is flowing - Blue Bols 50p a shot! Two for one on Archers and orange, for the classy BESHies (the ones who keep their hats on whilst undergoing an internal examination).

We have Vampire Bill and Brian Cox in the Dungeon, and David Mitchell and Brian Eno tending the bar....

OP posts:
ginhag · 04/02/2010 09:59

Oh I also have a waist and some hips. Legs are long enough to reach the ground,all that shiz.

iggypiggy · 04/02/2010 10:00

muse haz a squeeze and slap from me. Can only speak from personal experience - but I was ojk for a bit - then a wailing wreck for a bit - then ok again. Is very unlike me to wail. I fink was the hormone crash. Anyway - you sound v. good considering. Take this huge bar of chocolate and some gin.

I used to have a waist but I is not complaining really - cos getting fat is the name of the game innit.

Original poster
ChoChoSan · 04/02/2010 10:09

Mornink!

Re. dopplegangers...I have been told twice that I am a bit like the one who plays bridget jones, but with dark hair. However this is not true...we both you have daft smiles, and she prolly weighs 3 stones less than me.

Also, long ago told I look like 'a young Elizabeth Taylor', but I know for a fact the person who said that was on ecstacy.

I think I resemble Hambel the doll from Big Playschool, variously described as 'hate figure for the under-fives', 'dirty gypsy doll', 'Elizabeth Taylor on crack cocaine', and 'pure, unadulterated evil'

OP posts:
iggypiggy · 04/02/2010 10:19

I remember Hambel... what an odd name for a doll...

iggypiggy · 04/02/2010 10:20

Incedentally I was told I looked like Carole Vorderman (when I was about 15...) and some fool once said I look like Lorrayne Chase

VoilaAnotherGimlet · 04/02/2010 10:31

I felt sorry for Hambel - poor dolly was clearly hideous and no one liked her. One of the presenters drew pubic hair on her to freak out the others. Poor dolly. Why didn't they just replace her if no one liked her.

Cho I am sure you do not actually resemble Hambel. Please to supply a different mental image for my limited brain.

Muser · 04/02/2010 10:54

God I hate medical receptionists. Trying to get my test results from yesterday. Nobody called me back yesterday evening so I rang this morning. "We only give out results after 6.30pm, you'll have to ring back. If it was something serious or bad news someone would have rung you straight away".

For FUCKS sake. And you'd think someone manning the phones on an emergency desk might manage to sound like they weren't also reading Heat and filing their nails while deigning to speak to you.

VoilaAnotherGimlet · 04/02/2010 11:17

Bastards, Muser, not what you need.

Eadwacer · 04/02/2010 11:50

Fuck's sake muse. Happy to go round there with a hammer and sort that bitch. I'll file her fanny flat, that'll teach her.

I hate my job.

In other news, the fact that my droid is not A WHOLE DAY EARLY plainly has had me calculating how much maternity leave I can afford

CUNextTuesday · 04/02/2010 12:02

trophy-winning menkulness

Eadwacer · 04/02/2010 12:04

Thank you, thank you

And I give you pushy cow of the day

wildfig · 04/02/2010 12:23

muser receptionistFAIL. That's terrible, terrible, terrible.

Cho my dolly was called Hamble, after Hamble. She looked like quite a sensible doll, like her real name should be Margaret - but then hanging out next to flamboyant Jemima and her jazzy legs, and Floella Benjamin and her blue beads, didn't do her any favours. Poor Hamble. I wonder where she is now?

Gin as a big foot, I have stalked Kate Winslet and her shoe size, and she's a UK9, US 11, EU42. Paris Hilton is also a US 11 and has huuuuge long feet. So as long as Kate and Paris are kicking around, there will always have to be big Louboutins/Choos/Blahniks and THAT, ladies and gentleman, is the SOLE POINT of Paris Hilton.

ead I love that statue. She's St Joan from Mad Men.

Mmm, rugby thighs...

Eadwacer · 04/02/2010 12:40

SOLE point HAR HAR HAR HAAAAAAAA! Oh dearie me....

CurlyCasper · 04/02/2010 13:09

Somebody say rugby? Lovely legs and some friendly inter-nation banter. C'mon the Scots!

And time for me to bring Monsieur Michalak back to the La Palais. Don't think he plays anymore, so do as you please ladies. Just leave a little for me, there's a love.

Eadwacer · 04/02/2010 13:20

I don't know much about rugby but I know what I like

TwinkleToes76 · 04/02/2010 13:25

I likey a lotty!

But my new crush of shame is Jeremy Hardy. Saw him last night, he's like a teeny weeny pixie man! I want to put him in my pocket and carry him around with me, taking him out when I need a giggle. He has a big appetite for such a little man. And swears a lot - a characteristic I find quite endearing.

CurlyCasper · 04/02/2010 13:49

Ewww, eadie likes The Horse.
(ok, so I know Sebastian's surname is actually Chabal, but it sounds like cheval in the commentary, and he is a beast of a man!)

twinks that really is a crush of shame....

Got to love this little fella He was in a boyband that supported McFly, Peter Andre and Westlife, used to play for England and is now a Scotland international. I don't know what his singing and dancing was like, but he's bloody good on the field (and a little bit lovely)

PollyPoo · 04/02/2010 13:55

talk of rugby thighs has brought me out from under me duvet... I agree Ead, Sebastien Chabal is delish. I wouldn't mind a go on him - can we bring him to the pit and chain him up?

CUNextTuesday · 04/02/2010 13:56

I knows what I like too

faint

CUNextTuesday · 04/02/2010 13:58

ead and pol just want to be dragged round by the hair and beaten with clubs and made to eat mammoth. The man is a neanderthal, a behemoth. How in the name of all things holy can you find that facial hair acceptable??

Muser · 04/02/2010 13:59

Mmmmm. Rugby players. When I worked for charity with many many gay men, one of them got the French rugby player porn promotional video. Naked rugby players lounging around being French. We watched it in the office. It were great.

I miss being in an office where looking at scantily clad men was considered work!

Eadwacer · 04/02/2010 14:02

pollypoopants we could try and chain him up. Then with one great furious bellow he would burst from his chains. And fashion an unbreakable rope from his black locks. And with it tie the whole lot of us by the ankles to iron rings fixed into the walls, all the while sneering blackly from beneath his brow, sweat running in a salt trickle in the cleft between his shoulderblades. And then...

Oh sorry, where was I?

I was going to start a porn site once. For stimulating short stories for the discerning lady. Called thevelvetnib.com.

CUNextTuesday · 04/02/2010 14:03

I fear it may be very...ahhhh... specialist

ginhag · 04/02/2010 14:05

Rugby,or rugby players,just don't do it for me...

ginhag · 04/02/2010 14:07

Nor does Russell Howard