The BESH 30's TTC: "Shall I get me rat out, Doctor?"

[ChoChoSan]

The Palace is open and the anti-freeze is flowing - Blue Bols 50p a shot! Two for one on Archers and orange, for the classy BESHies (the ones who keep their hats on whilst undergoing an internal examination).

We have Vampire Bill and Brian Cox in the Dungeon, and David Mitchell and Brian Eno tending the bar....

gin I know it wasn't a choice but you have my upmost admiration for cs. My fears about ahem "natural" birth are well documented. But that's the road I want. And if the size of my hips are anything to go by I reckon a polite cough & it will all be over .

Where can I find more information re hypno birthing? I fear I'm slightly hippy at heart, love my yoga, big believer in closing eyes & deep breathing.

The only hospital experience I've ever had is after my acrobatics down the stairs & broke wrist. Had to have G&A while they re-set it. I closed my eyes, breathed deeply & took my little brain off to Thailand. It wasn't my most favourite morning ever, but I honestly don't remember a single bit of pain (thanks be to shock & said G&A. Oh & farking big needle they stuck in arm first). Anyhoo, that's the only kinda comparison I have. So I intend to close my eyes, take lots of G&A & beyond that, who the fuck knows?

I know, completely different really, but I keep thinking if I can do the wrist thing, I can give birth (despite me starting to walk out of the hospital with broken wrist wrapped in a teatowel saying "no fucking way" when they told me it needed re-setting)

Cheers lozza! well,it was sort of a 'choice' in that I could've said no..but considering mani's heartrate was dropping below 40 (from about 130) whenever I had the slightest contraction,it was pretty unlikely he'd have made it through labour,so then I'd have had a 'crash' section which would be worse...

Is weird,sort of surreal really.all the stuff just happens,and that's what's happening,and so you deal with it iyswim.

But yeah I was like you,scared shitless of natural birth but wanting it anyway. With the mmc I had already started to research home vbac etc,although I'm not sure if I'm brave enough... Oh yeah and am actually not sure if I can get pg again,keep forgetting that when thinking bout all this stuff!

I actually went thru another 'fuck I am so selfish,we should be adopting,there are so many kids that need love' thing recently. Was really upset by guardian article on child cruelty n it got me thinking... However came back to conclusion that I'm not strong enough for adoption thing...

Oh and as it turned out he wouldn't have got thru labour. My placenta was fucked. When it came out mw said she had never seen one so knackered. Which makes me speshul obv

Hi ladies

Sorry haven't been about much - am emotionally roller-coastering a bit. Anyway, wanted to wade into the "natural" v cs debate with an anecdote about my sister. She had a "natural" birth first time round, fairly horrific (back to back, only G&A since by the time she decided on drugs baby was too far down and she couldn't curl enough, bad tearing, nearly needed blood transfusion, days and days of it etc) which gave her flashbacks and (undiagnosed) pnd. Her second was an "el cs", elected more by the new consultant who saw her on the Friday before her Weds due date, warned her that tearing again would cause irreparable damage. So she had the cs on the Monday morning. And she has not stopped singing the praises of cs since - she bonded with baby 2 much quicker, managed to breast feed as she wasn't in so much pain this time, and generally found recovery to be far far quicker. She now thinks this is the most civilised way of giving birth and is considering a third child!

Just goes to show, every birth, whatever method, is so different and individual to the circumstances.

Apols if I have missed something huge over last few days, am desparately trying to catch up. Nice to see Scorps has imprisoned Mitchell in the Pit of Doom.

lorry talk to cunty re meditation and doulas. She has a really lovely doula,which I think is a great idea.

Hello vag hope you okay lovely?

Agree re all births different etc! Also think there's a world of difference between an elective (and so planned,mulled over,wanted and as is sis's case an alternative to a truly awful experience) and emergency (so unplanned and so not prepared for in the same way.) I don't think I would've been so scared if it was elective (maybe.) is so mad that I had same probs with bonding and pnd for opposite reason!

Is a feckin minefield....

thanks for calming me nerves vag was reading the other cs posts in horror, half an hour after being told that i'll most likely have to have a section.

not my birth of choice, but at least there will be drugs .....

cheeky line of babydust anyone?

Fuck cheggs I would totallyNOT want to scare you.

My original point was that it was not the birth I wanted,and I was scared,but that in the end it was about doing what had to be done. And under those circumstances you just deal with it.

I seriously think scariest thing for me was that it was emergency not elective. If you have the chance to prepare yourself and know what's going to happen would be different.

Besides I know fuck all about natural birth,would prob be moaning about that if I'd had it!

Am not going to talk about it anymore. My whole point at the start of this was that the birth is the SMALLEST PART of this 'adventure'! Am really sorry.

How are the twinz? And you? (other than terrified obv)

Also if it was really that bad I would be to scared to try for another baby in case it happened again. In all honestly I would have cs,natural birth,whatever the fuck if it meant I could have another baby. The kid is the point, not the birth in the end.

arr don't be sorry sweetness

i actually find it interesting to hear all the different stories.

and i'm not really terrified - am another hard as nails northerner see.

am fine, and twins are fine just in loopy positions.

more worried about you lot in your various pits of doom.

how long d'you have to wait for your tube results gin?

www.hypnobirthing.co.uk/. My friend did it but in the end she just said it helped her prepare mentally although it all went out the window 36 hrs into a rather long labour by which time she was sreaming for all the drugs she could take.

Since we are on the topic of birth stories I had a pretty nasty natural birth and was threatened with emergency c-section if I did not "get him out within 3 pushes". Cue the forseps and the little blighter was dragged out but my uterus was pretty fucked up after it and they had to wang inside me a balloon type thing filled with a litre saline to try and stop the bleeding and to prevent my womanly womb turning into a gnarled mess. I was in high dependancy for 3 days with my beloved balloon up me chuftie and the pain was unmentionable. Up until recently I would have said hands down I would elect for c section (if I am ever blessed with another of course) but I now think now I would do still do it all again naturally if I could. You just deal with whatever happens and that is why women are the better sex!

The last thing the consultant said to me is my experience should not affect my ability to conceive again, but who knows huh?? So I may be a BESH rather than just an ESH only time will tell. In the meantime I am soooo grateful to have what I have.

Like Gin says the birth is just one thing, the looking after a ickle baby is the tricky bit.

I've made a decision.

Ignorance is bliss.

Sorry but I've trawled this site today like a woman possessed & sat aghast at many of the birth stories (no offence intended to anyone, I truly admire those who have gone through it).

Please give me a shout when we're back to perving over film stars / sportsmen / comedians etc.

cheggs...

Am so glad to hear all's well,think about you lots so am glad you popped in! I honestly think that given the fact there's 2 in there,and you have time to mentally prepare,a cs is prob soooo much better than vaginal anyway...

As for tube results,haven't even seen consultant yet! Appt is a week on fri. Not sure if I'm more worried about possible knackered tube or the load of adhesions they found when scanning before last mc. Adhesions=not good.

As honey says tho,those of us who have got one babber are Very Lucky. Still hope I'll manage another,but if not I want to try and remain positive (stop laughing at the back!)

Also cheggs when are you due? I has forgot.

Sorry lorry it was exactly the opposite of what I started out trying to do. Go back and read my first post,then ignore everything else The same thing applies re different situations etc. Do talk to cuntyabout doulas tho. Think I would look into it if I got diffed again.

now,enough hospital talk,about time we did some slammers and started a bar brawl!

yes, birth stories should never be told.

Honestly we're all just making it up. As I believe ski once said,it's just a delicate sneeze and then someone hands you a freshly-scrubbed,rosy-cheeked cherub

now watching said programme and agreeing with previous opinions on Steve. Eejit. Mind you I've also concluded that if and when we get there TH will spend the whole of labour laughing cos that's his standard emotional response to most things.

My fella put one of those paper bed pans on my head (an unused one) while I was in the throes of labour and took a photo which he emailed around all his mates. It made him laugh anyway

Just sitting down to watch said programme. Haven't got passed the titles and I am already in tears. Fucking sap!

Well I am watching the Wonder Pets. And they are saving the day. Again.

I still have no interest in that programme. There is simply nothing anyone can say to make me watch it, and I can't think what good it does,adit is bound to be after drama otherwise would be crap telly.

And I think we should stop discussing birth here as we are causing muchas distress...da beshies have enough to worry about,let's get the diffing done first eh?

So BESHlets I wanna hear from chochalina is tomorrow POAFS day?!

I am with the ginsoakedhaggyone in that I haz absolutely no desire to watch that programme... and I changed channel when I saw it come on.

poolet you sounds v. good today - yay for the TCM and let's hope it does it's thing fast.

c'mere you..everythin's okay...I've brought gin and chocolate...

Yep iggs it's tomorrow. I am full of hope (and gin of course.)

Oh polly love! You're going to need a stiff gin or six by the end. I wish I could fine one other solitary person that quite liked Steve and his antics though. Laughter is the best medicine etc. etc. etc.