Feisty & Fabulous at 40+ more adventures of TTC

[gonepearshaped]

Actually now I feel guilty using up the last post of the thread - hope this will do as a continuation

jollster really sorry to hear about MMC, that is so sad . You sound like you are OK but hope you are getting lots of TLC from DH/DP and everyone else. Sorry your friend is leaving for Oz, maybe a holiday in the not too distant future . Thinking of you.

rowingboat Not exactly a soap opera, more of a very slow, short radio play! Hope the cysts drain OK and procedure goes well. All best luck for that. As you are over 40 I think you may be successful with getting all three. I was told no way as my eggs will be donor so younger but I think if they had not been I would have tried for three if I had the chance!

Excuse me jumping in rowingboat and Tetley but what were fluffy, Barry and Foo-foo? Were they names for embies or have I got the wrong end of the stick! I have decided to name my embies if I am lucky enough to get any. It is quite nice as I get to use those fab names that I would not be ?allowed? to use in real life! I?m not sure what the thing is about a December baby, is it because it is cold or because of all the busy-ness of Christmas? If this cycle works we will have a December baby but then again we don?t have any choice about when it happens and I am actually quite excited about the prospect of a December baby (but even I hope they would put in an appearance before Christmas day!). Have a friend whose baby was born on Christmas Day and she thought it was lovely, so in the words of Lauren ?whatever!?

Hopeful45 Hope you produce that extra follicle.

KiwiKat let?s get those bloomin? follicles out from hiding! I think it sounds like you have a good few, and they can grow a bit in next few days. Stay positive. I had a lovely birthday, sending chocolatey hugs right back at ya!

Thank you everyone for all your kind comments re my new job. Your comment rowing made me LOL - I can't imagine the mother of DD's best friend being either a tramp or a drunk so I think my DD is safe.

rowing hope the funeral went smoothly yesterday. Fingers crossed for your procedures. Apart from the cyst business it seemed to me that Friday had gone reasonably well - is that right? - but I'll be honest I don't really understand the process you are going through so some of the comments go over my head.

hopeful good luck for your follicles tomorrow! How's your mum? It's a good point you made - the "mommy, you're home" welcome will be all the better and I'm sure the few drop-off and pick-ups from school that I can do will be all the more special . I'm a Researcher in Exec Search which basically means I track down potential candidates for executive jobs, contact them, get them interested in the role and screen them for suitability. I'm very lucky as the work is really pleasant.

italian - your birthday sounds like fun and great to have a visit from your sis to look forward to!

*Tetley - congrats on the new house! When are you moving in?

SMTA I'm sorry re your bike. That totally sucks. Not much you can do, I guess - claim on the insurance and move on.

jollster I'm so sorry about your MMC. The positive thing is that you are getting pregnant so it is probably just a question of the right embryo coming along. I hope you managed to have a happy birthday.

Good luck and best wishes to all of you waiting for more follicles!

Hopeful any news?

How is everyone doing?

I'm still reading the thread, and Jollster,really sorry to hear your news.

Nothing new under the sun for me.Same old eggless days! But it is okay, I'm trying to be patient and I kid myself that I'll just get a very nice surprise one day.

It is very hot here today, so just trying to keep the LO hydrated and trying to very very little! Pity the groceries won't put themselves away!

Hope all is going well for those of you doing ART.

That should say trying to "do very very little". I just broke open the gree and black's chocolate. Oh, why does it have to taste SOOO good!?

Belated Birthday wishes to all those having birthdays.

Hi guys. Any news from ILGH and TFLS?

Thinking of you both. As the old song goes - One day at a time, Sweet Jesus - you'll get there

Hi everyone,

Jollster I'm so sorry to hear you are back at square one. I think it goes like that as you get older, it's being tough and going on that seems to win the prize. I hope you have a webcam so you can start chatting with your friend soon.

Kiwi you still have time for those follies to grow and four on one side is good, there could be the same on the other side that they can't see. There is a girl on my thread on FF who had two follies, two embies and now is carrying two babies.

Italian the names were the names of the embryos, so what were the names you had in mind??

Hippy how are you today??

The funeral did go OK, it was a nice service, quite small with close family. I still feel a bit weird being home again and everything being normal, when I know I won't see her again. It really feels like a link with the past and your childhood has been broken when you lose a grandparent. Very sad for everyone.
I had a bit of a mishap on the way home though and seem to have lost my purse. I cancelled my cards, which means I can't pay for the treatment tomorrow as I intended. In fact I am having some misgivings about having surgery and an general anaesthetic, this was supposed to be a low stress cycle, not one with invasive procedures.
After discovering the cysts I did a bit of a google and discovered that taking ibuprofen can stop ovulation, it just creates a cyst, which can be enlarged. Funnily enough I have been taking ibuprofen every day since having the ear problem, I mean usually three times a day, so quite a lot. Since Friday I haven't taken any ibuprofen and plan to phone the consultant tomorrow to ask if this could be the cause of the cysts. If stopping ibuprofen would end the problem I would prefer to wait until next cycle than have surgery, and I can't pay them anyway.
Phew, that's it. I will post tomorrow with an update.

thanks everyone for your kind wishes

so sorry rowing you are having a stressy time - the last thing you need right now. Hoping things get brighter.

hippy have seen posts from TFLS on other threads - sounds like she's doing fine. IIRC ILGH is away from home (here in UK I think, installed in the JLP of her choice getting a fix), so probably no time or facilities to keep us updated.

Did not get my ERPC at the weekend as got bumped off as no bed. Have to wait til next Tuesday for my scheduled slot, OR can go on stand-by again for this weekend. But that's so invasive for ruining the day - waiting around for possibly nothing that I think I will wait now. Have had some spotting which keeps threatening to go heavy, but still nothing really significant. All a bit frustrating.

Am just focused on spending the loveliest of times with my DS. We have had lovely weather here so far this week, so picnics on the beach, lots of park activites etc. Since he turned 1 last May I have been (over?) focused on #2. Getting pregnant, tough first trimester feeling sick and tired, MMC1, recovering emotionally, obsessing with getting pregnant again. Getting pregnant again, worrying through the first 11 weeks. getting another MMC diagnosis.... blah blah blah. I have a gorgeous little boy, I need to enjoy him. It may just be him, so I can't wish my life away...

Talking of which, time to read Monkey Puzzle again!

Have a lovely day everyone x

Hope everyone is well.

Hello. Just dropping in to get this back on my active threads after being awol (actually home in UK for a week). Will catch up on news and then post long and boring update.

Hi all,

ILGH - good to hear from you. Hope the holiday is going well.

Jollster - can't believe your bad luck at two mmc at such late stages. Glad you're having such a lovely time with DS - the picnics on the beach sound beautiful. Any more news on a date yet?

Rowing - I'm glad the funeral went as well as these things can. It is a real landmark when a grandparent dies - the end of an era but hopefully all the memories will continue with you and your family. PITA re the purse. I hope your ibuprofen explanation is right - definitely worth checking out. Fingers crossed for you.

Gum - very of your sunshine and green and black chocolate! You do know that they've just announced that it's been the coldest winter here in 30 years!

Frosticle - congrats re new job. Sounds great.

Italian - happy belated birthday!

Kiwi and Hopeful - sorry the follicles are playing hard to get. Sending you both very fruitful and multiple vibes!

Sarah - re bike. How annoying for you. Hope karma gets the thief!

Tetley - good luck with the house move. Do keep in touch - I'm a firm believer in these things happen when you least expect it, so hope you're soon christening the new house with a BFP!

I'm 10 weeks today. Stupidly I'm struggling with it as I was 10 weeks to the day when I miscarried last time. Was promised an early scan at 10 weeks but then told no, the policy has changed. Then promised it would be 12 weeks. Just got the appointment through and it is for 26 March (13 weeks 2). Tried to call and get an earlier one but the clinic is closed after 1.30pm. Patience was never my strong point even when I wasn't a nervous wreck! Been off checking out private scans but they do cost quite a bit..... Sorry for the me, me, me rant but it's really thrown me today. Disproportionately so.

Sorry if I've left anyone out - love to all.

rowing read a great story on-line today about a woman who had a 3 year old from IVF, then they went back and put 3 frozen embryos in and she now has triplets as well. Apparently, it is very rare for all 3 to take like that. The story was basically to say that they were all conceived on the same day but one is now 3 and the others are all new borns. wonderful story. Some moron put on the comments after - people shouldn't play god and if women are not able to conceive naturally they should get a cat or a dog - f*ing idiot!!!

jollster I honestly think you are incredible. I din't dare leave the house for the 3 days I was waiting for EPRC, I felt like I was in suspended animation. You have been picnicing etc. Wow, you must feel devastated and so robbed (I know I was afetr 1 MMC), and yet you are doing all these things for your DS - what a great mummy you are. I really hope you get the procedure done soon. You need to begin the recovery process. I think it is terrible that you have to wait so long.

TFLS If you really are worried maybe it is worth paying for a private scan, obviously I don't know your financial situation. I understand what you mean exactly. If I get preg again I will be panicing around the 8 week mark (when my little one stopped) and then again at 11 weeks (when we found out). Sending hugs your way.

ILGH I assume all still ok with you. How many weeks are you now. Are you using the progesterone??

waves to everyone else - love to all. xx

rowingboat Sorry to hear about your purse, and of course the cysts. I hope that things have sorted themselves out, the cysts I mean.

rowingboat Thanks for asking about my potential embies' names! I'm not superstitious but I don?t want to say any names until they are a reality. Last time we didn't get any eggs so no embies so want to wait until they are a reality! BUT I am fascinated to hear about your names and how you picked them! I kind of want to name them because even if they don't make it they are real for that time. I was aiming on unisex names but I love the name Daisy and as hubby once had a dog called Daisy we would never have a child called it. What do you think about non-unisex names for embies?!

jollster Echo what Hippy says - what a great mum you are to think of fun things to do with DS. I completely understand where you are coming from about your ds and not wasting any of the time but also wanting something to happen with another baby. We have been trying to conceive for almost five years, well five years in August! This is our last attempt and I do need to remind myself to enjoy all the time with my growing girl who gets more grown up every week. She's recently had a haircut and now looks like a little lady! Enjoy it all. Beach! Are you in the UK? Or are you in some sunny climate?

thefatladyscreams Hope you get your scan earlier if they can do it.

Hi to all. Just off to bed but wanted to ask if anyone rates this flippin' book - Taking Charge of Your Fertility: The Definitive Guide to Natural Birth Control by Toni Weschler. It seems to be mentioned on so many threads.

I do know the basics but if it will help get the ball rolling again, I am prepared to splash out on a second hand copy from amazon - "oh get you Hippy - last of the big spenders" .

Any good???

Evening all, just popping on quickly before I do the midnight Pregnyl shot - it's all happening on Friday! I had to take my final Menopur shot this afternoon at 5 pm, so there I was, hiding in the loos at the office, shooting up. Surreal ... My scary female boss called me into her office on Monday, when I got back from my scan. She tried to get me to tell her what procedure I was having done, whether it was X, Y, or IVF, and told me that she had every right to know what was happening. I told her I'd bring her a docgtor's certificate, but didn't want to discuss it. So she's guessed, but I didn't confirm it. Does she have the right to demand that I tell her? She let it drop then, but fished a bit later, checking whether I'd be up to handling my work, if I needed any more time off. Faked concern, blatant fishing - don't need that right now.

Hippy, I found that book absolutely fascinating, and wish I'd read it earlier.

Choccy hugs to all.

Kiwikat replied to you on the other thread.

How are you Hippy Rowing glad the funeral was OK.

How is everyone else? Sending smiles to TFLS, ILGH, Gum, Jollster and Frosticle and all

Interesting article at

What fab news for the family and hope for any about to undergo a FET.

Good luck to all

.....Although I am not sure they are strictly quads.....the Free Dictionary by Farlex says of Quadruplet ??one of four offspring born at one birth Often shortened to quad? and Macmillan dictionary says - ?a baby who is born at the same time as three other babies to the same mother?

Alba How's it going? Thinking of you and your great name. Did you find a good book to read?

See I am mad about English language even arguing with definitions in the newspaper! Hope all is well.

Just a quickie, kiwi. No, your boss does not have a right to know the details. I am appalled that she thinks she does. I was in HR for years and if anyone's boss behaved liked yours she'd have the book thrown at her. She sounds like a loon.

Hellojust popping in for a quick post/update. Thanks everyone for the well wishes for the follicles. I'm still at just the 3 follicles but they are growing well (10mm, 13.5mm and 14mmthe 6mm turned into a 10mm in 2 days so that's very good). However, I'm still not meeting the minimum criteria of 4 follicles and will not get another one to catch up in time even if they do discover a 3-4mm one kicking around. I think my last ultrasound before the trigger shot will be Friday morning. I tried saying, "Isn't 3 follicles pretty close to 4?" to the clinic but they said the cost/risk of the anaesthetic for the IVF wasn't worth the benefit/probability of success with only 3 follicles as I'd be super lucky to end up with 3 good quality eggs from 3 follicles. I think their reluctance is also based on the high probability that, given my age, the DNA in the eggs is not goodeven if we can collect and fertilize all 3. So, I'm torn between just accepting that this will be an IUI cycle only after all of these needles and fighting harder to try to convince them to try IVF anyway. I was really looking forward to the ICSI procedure since I have a theory that my eggs are tough and inpenetrable at my age and only the ICSI will work (the sperm need that extra push to break through!) What do you ladies think? Should I try harder to talk them into the IVF? I have spent over $6,000 on meds and do feel that the IUI is unlikely to result in a pregnancy (just based on the fact that we did 5 IUIs (unmedicated) in the past yearall without success).

Kiwi How many follicles did you end up with? Your boss sounds horribly nosy! Best of luck to you and I'll be thinking of you on Friday.

My mum is still in the hospital (Day 17) following her stroke/seizures. Physically, she's doing a bit better (not walking or feeding herself yet but getting stronger) but mentally she is completely delerious--doesn't know who anyone is (including herself), what year it is, etc. etc. Very hard on my dad. The only positive side (if you could call it that) is that I've taken a few weeks off work to deal with it all which has allowed me to do all the monitoring and travel out of country for the procedure without having to make up any excuses to my workplace.

TFLS Hope you get your ultrasound soon--ideally free but paying might not be a bad idea to ease your mind (I've sure been spending a lot of money lately on the quest for a baby)

Italiangreyhound Sounds like you are being a patient patient, awaiting your procedure! You must be getting more and more excited each day.

Yes...we need to count our beautiful blessings we have already. I am very lucky!

Hugs to all and keep up the faith. Wow--quite a long post for just "popping in"

Hi all
Sorry been a bit quiet, back at work and very little time, have been keeping up on just the one thread (post mc TTC waves to Hippy, Jollster, Tetley and TFLS apologies if I'm about to repeat myself!)
Thanks for remembering me Italian .

I can relate to your concern about telling your employers anything Kiwi -- I hear so many people with lovely supportive workplaces, mine's testosterone driven and since I had a child I've been very sidelined. Lots of lovely family friendly policies on paper, in practice if you don't carry on just as before and put your home life on hold it's a big black mark. I have to give myself a little talking to occasionally that my priority is my family and I shouldn't get dragged into spending all my waking hours working. Promotions just aren't worth it. Very best of luck, especially with not letting them get to you and finding time and space to relax. TTC is stressful enough, I admire all of you going through all these procedures and keeping your sanity intact.

Hopeful that's such hard work going through all that with your mum in hospital too, I don't know enough to give any opinions, but very best of luck with whatever you decide.

I'm about to head out to the Dr's for blood tests. Given my age, I managed to persuade them to do some of the tests you're not supposed to get till after 3 mc's -- so checking for antiphospholipid antibodies and hormone checks (have a long list, may be checking back in here to find out what they all mean, you sound like a knowledgeable bunch!). I don't want to go through this all again twice before discovering there may be something that could have prevented it. And if they all come back negative, well, then I hope I'll be able to feel more confident and positive.

Must run, or I'll be late.

Gosh, so much going on.I apologise if I don't remember everything going on.
Hopeful, I really think they should let you go ahead with the ivf, you've come this far...
Kiwi, it is getting very exciting.Don't like the sound of your boss.It's none of her business, and it doesn't sound like she'd be at all supportive. When my Dh and I were going throught his reversal etc my boss was in the know, but he was a very supportive man who bent over backwards to help out, made sure we had plenty of time etc and was great with my leave.
Hippy, I've read that book cover to cover.It is wonderful.I also just LOVE The Infertility Cure by Randine Lewis.It is my all time favourite, but then I'm a big fan of acupuncture and Chinese herbs.
Incidentally, I was reading another alternative health book the other day (my daughter has impetigo for the third time in two months and the antibiotics aren't doing the trick! Yuck!) and I came across some info about miscarriage.It was saying that we should stay away from ibruprofen if we are ttc and in the first trimester; also b6 and other b vitamins,and extra folate, all supposed to help. Also, getting "homocysteine" levels checked.If it is too high, it will cause miscarriage.
Of course that isn't to say that any of those things caused the miscarriages that people here have been having. I just thought it was worth mentioning.
Hope you preggie girls are feeling well. Can't wait to join you...

hopeful45 really thinking of you and your mum at this time . Re your treatment - I am not sure, I think if you are really sure this is your last attempt I would push for IVF if you have three allowing for the fact that it may not work. If you really think/know that IVF for you would have a better chance than IUI then I would push for it.

Thanks for saying I am patient, I don?t feel very patient at the moment! I felt very emotional yesterday and cried, said DH didn't want to have another baby etc, just me being hormonal. Bit worried this is a period building as not meant to have them. Can one go from being glad to see periods to not wanting them in a month! Buseralin is meant to keep them at bay! Not sure but will see. Latest news is that there is no news so when donor has scan we will know more. Excited, watching 'One born every minute' making me eager to be pregnant and not quite so eager to give birth all in one go!

Alba Have you seen the movie ?Click? all about a man making work his priority over family, with Adam Sandler, actually had me in tears! Hope the tests are all OK.

hopeful45 Must add I am not a doctor so you must think of your health but if you were going to have one last go and you are not having anymore then having this go whether it is 3 or 4 follicles can't really be any more risky, can it? Doctors need to look out for your care so you need to listen to them but if no risks then I would push for whatever will work best.

awww thanks hippy and IGH, that's really lovely. Well I'll never be a yummy mummy that's for sure.... . (I'm in Brighton btw, which is sort of abroad..?)

kiwikat that's truly shocking - I worked in people functions (focused on company culture) before DS and agree with ILGH - that's terrible behaviour.

hopeful have all fingers and toes crossed for you. You sound in a "good place" about it all.

Had probably one of my least fave days on the planet. WAS planning to visit baby lambs on a friend's farm. INSTEAD started at 4am with some ominous cramping which I tried to ignore, and did until 6... Then had 5 hours of frightening blood loss. I rotated from loo to shower to bath. Unpleasant in the extreme. Not sure it's all over either. Hats off to the au naturale brigade but give me surgery every time... .

Hi to everyone x

Have just logged on very quickly to see how you are all doing. Good luck and lots of good wishes to all of you having procedures.

Kiwi your boss sounds incredibly ignorant but no doubt is under the deluded impression that she's being clever. Sad. Just sorry you have to deal with her.

hippy I have that book and it's great. There's a lot in it that's not relevant, i.e. how to keep track of your cycle to prevent conception, but you can skip right along past those bits to the good bits! Made me wonder how I'd reached my 40s without knowing a lot of that stuff, e.g I had no idea about egg white mucus until I read that book.

jollster - you are amazing!

My DP has just ordered a 14ft trampoline for my DD for her 5th birthday - he assures me it'll fit in the bottom part of the garden (it's on 3 levels) but I'm not so sure. 14 ft for goodness sake!!!

Oh Jollster, sorry to hear about your awful day. I hope that's the worst of it. I'm amazed that you couldn't get into hospital right away to have the procedure. There would be no waiting here, but I know our health systems are quite different. One good thing about the Australian health system is if you have private insurance, which is optional, you can see a doc or go to a private hospital and it is covered by the insurance company.It usually means you get what you need right away.
It is much the same with the ultrasounds. I am surprised that someonme was saying they had to wait til 13 weeks? I thought it was important to have the scan at 12 weeks if you want to do the nuchal test.I imagine paying for it yourself would be very expensive?

My lovely DH has taken the day off work as I have been having a hard time of late.Just not getting enough sleep and dealing with a willful toddler.So I am looking forward to a bit of quiet time today.

Kiwi and Rowing, how's the ART going? Hope it is all working out.