Mid 30s TTC - Simply The BESH... BESHer than all the rest!

[Scorpette]

Come on in, ladies. I've had a widescreen telly installed and there's a big cupboard full of 80s teen movies if anyone's interested. New and more secure cages for our prey are being delivered soon. There's a big picture of a desert over the bar, a loudly ticking clock in the corner and bowls of raisins, currants and sultanas on every table; everything the discerning BESH could ask for...

pony don't let my habits torture you, the only reason I do it is to not torture myself. I usually go against the currrent, so I guess this is just the case here. I await your Wednesday news - should we start a new thread before then, if the limit is only ONE PER???

scorps sucks that the bleed is back - shit, so sorry to hear! I've had a friend with CFS - that's the worst, tita! I mean you feel like shit all the time, and people don't believe you. I hope you get updiffed soon so the symptoms are for something cute and crying.

Testing that early is in part to see if the HCG trigger has left my system yet - it usually takes 7-10 days to leave (you get a false pos if it's still there) then you would get a neg, then a real positive to follow - really, I just do it for information and something to do. We all create coping mechanisms.

The land of the free, does have free healthcare now in fact, but I'll take that swipe because of your clever useage of strike out.

gin thanks for the tip, I did get radio 6 on the internet... still getting used to it, perhaps it was the program or timing or just general unfamiliarity. A litte better now, (since I've taken so long to read and respond in this post) and subscribed to Adam and Joe, but currently there are "no playable episodes" so I must wait.

kimdeal holy shit - you've really gone and done it now! Congrats - and just take a breather when it comes to comments, I think that's the majority of why I'm an underground baybee-wisher, I just don't want to deal with the comments or questions.

OK, so here's my dillemma of yesterday: a client wants to schedule a trip inter-island for me for three days in the last week of 2WOOFL (actually day 12-14) plus my mum and aunt will be here and leaving during those days - do I go then, or earlier - I can't decide which will be more torturous! Judging by my last 2WOOFL, I'd say I'm leaning towards going the week before and taking the mom and aunty with me. They can run amok and have fun while I work.

FFS - sorry for the marathon post, lots happened while I was sleeping! (I'm sure even more has been posted while I was reading it!)

mmm - billy idol

x-post with scorp's idea of upping the ratios to 2 per

evening ladies - busy, busy, busy lately, so not much posting, or as much SWI as I would like. Ah well....

Hello all,

Although I haven't posted at all lately, I have been stalking you lurking and just wanted to pop in to say hello.

Saddo alert - I actually checked-in to day to see if Scorps had POAFS yet - the suspense is killing me! I need to get a life obviously

Congrats to Kim Deal on an actual updiffment! gin already stole the Gigantic joke . Are you planning a final baby-free holiday to celebrate? Y'know a Last Splash. How about a Safari? Oh ho ho, my sides are splitting.

I'm on day 5 of the 2WOOFL, but not expecting much luck this month. SWI hasn't exactly been abundant this month. Oh well.

Hi Aerie! Nice to know others are thinking of one 's fragile mental health - I hope your TWOOFL is fruitful; remember that it only takes one sperm, one time for updiff

R2D2 due tomorrow - if still only getting 'beige bits' when I get up, I promise I will POAS. I've felt periody-crampy for 4 days now but nothing. It's v annoying.

And by saying that, I am guaranteeing that it'll be a full-on Red Tide.

Just watched 'the secret life of bees'

it's very good.

Hey don'ttry good to know you're not wasting away down there

Now open your mouth

ello aerie!

Just checking in on my way to bed...a Slippery Nipple for the road please, barkeep.

Nice one Kim! Please stay and tell us how you did it (something about sticking a willy up your front bottom?)...and let us know what happens next (puking/boobage etc etc)...

Hey Aerie, miss you, sorry I mean . Maybe you'll post a bit next week? Are you on FB?

Hi Donttry, update please - how many weeks, scan, symptoms, news etc??

Hi all. Just wanted to pop in to say a big congrats to kim.

Just to kill the mood, I have been lurking a little bit but I am having a really hard time dealing with the mc. I thought I was ok and then suddenly just couldn't stop crying. This has not been helped by my best friend lying to me (don't know why) about a mutual friend not being pregnant and then gleefully revealing today that she is after all 20 weeks pregnant and having a little girl. For some reason the lying and the detail about her having a girl upset me the most. To be fair, I hadn't told him about being updiffed or having a miscarriage but I am so upset - perhaps I need a quick smack round the face and some good news, someone else get updiffed, quick.

Hi bessie. I have been thinking about you as I am not at all sure that I would cope with a mc. That situation with your friend would be horrible even without these circumstances - that really is crap of the worst kind. I don't know what to say. Would an affectionate kick in the shins help?

gin why thank you! But I can't really take the credit. I stole her from a pram in Waitrose one day.

scorp Sorry to scare you with that pg rubbish, but you have to believe me when I say that I didn't meet anyone who had a worse pg than me, so you can safely ignore everything I say. Other people were flying all over the place on business trips, going to the gym, going water skiing, etc. And bloody Zoe Williams "didn't realise" she was pg until about 5 months!! That's 5 months of living a normal life instead of what I described, so just believe you are going to be one of those ones. Oh, and slim and beautiful? Let me enlighten you: legs don't move = you stop pooing. Did you know that? I didn't. So on top of everything else I was constipated, taking horrid laxatives, and put on 2 stone. Like I say, radiant and blossoming.

Hey beshie. glad you popped in...been wondering how you're doing.

It takes time to get over a mc. I felt emotionally bashed to pieces for ages,and was obsessed with being pg again (didn't find out about mine til 12 week scan which didn't help!)

try not to be hard on yourself. It's okay to be upset! When you find out you are pg it's impossible not to invest a lot emotionally/start think of the future etc etc. So there is a big sense of loss when that is taken away.

Be nice to yourself,try and take it easy (yeah right!) and have a good vent whenever you need to. There's a bunch of BESHes hanging around the palace who will listen. And give you manly backslaps.

And look, I never do this in the palace but

it does get easier I promise. It's all still raw at the moment. You will be okay.

Now drink this (produces extremely large and slightly scary looking cocktail) Look it has sparklers!

poneez I fucking hated being pg, was crap at it! However your experience beats me hands down!

kim don't let this scare you,remember despite what we felt about being pg we are still trying to do it again! So must've been worth it,eh? Or we are insane masochists

and some people (such as one of my best mates) have lovely pgs with no vomit or nuffink.

Oh Beshie, we are always here for you. I wouldn't be so stupid to say I know how you feel, but I can empathise with how hurtful your friend's thoughtlessness must be. Any type of pointless lying is awful, but that is so unfortunately coincidental. I bet you're feeling like everyone is getting/staying pg, which is bad enough feeling when you're just TTC, so I can't imagine how horrible it must be when you've MCed. But as always with a MC, the only upside is that it shows you're fertile and can achieve updiff. And you WILL again

bessie What Scorps and gin said. Again, very unbesh-style hugs from me. I hope you're taking care of yourself.

Scorpette Have just started bleeding, too. Bah. Everything hurts and I can't be arsed to go for planned run and the in-laws are coming over. On bright side, the end of 2WOOFL is always nice.

scorps Is it really bleeding? Piss stick might be wrong? Clutching at straws? (Messing with your head, moi?)

Well, I dunno what's going on now Camel, because the brownish stuff has stopped AGAIN. This is my FIFTH day of 'beige-brown bits and smears' (only on loo roll - gussets have remained pristine). WTF is going on? Am writing a letter: "Dear body, could you just decide to make me be pregnant or menstruate? It's getting really annoying now. Thank you".

Still not going to gym, though. Have only been twice this week, but only got 4 hours sleep (insomnia) and am abso-bloody-lutely cream crackered. Am failing badly in my 'lose a stone in 2 months for my birthday' plan. But Poor You - nobody needs cramps AND in-laws! They don't ask you unwittingly tactless questions about grandchildren, do they?

Pony, it's not bleeding, no: as just said it's dark beige bits and flecks in normal FJ when I wipe - and not much of them and not every time I wipe. This morning there was a bit of russet colour, not red (can't describe it any better), like a tiny smear of old blood, but nothing since. And droid due today (D28). I do occasionally get 3-4 days of 'bits 'n' spotting' leading up to a full-on period (this happened last month), but the amount and colour of stuff coming out always increases steadily each time and there's always something noticeable after wiping. Also fact am getting FJ is weird, cos usually v dry leading up to droid. Hmm.

I've now started deluding myself that it IS implantation stuff or that I'm one of those women who bleed a bit for the first few months (my Gran had 'periods' for the first 3 months with my Mum, and she was a BESH). I feel a bit crampy and menstrual down below, but I've never been updiffed, so how do I know if, for me, early pg feels the same? God, it's so maddening!

Sorry to go on in minute detail about the contents of my pants. And basically re-re-re--re-repeat myself I'm not this boring and obsessive in RL, I promise you all! Just slightly boring and obsessive

I really do hope it is good news for you Scorpette but alas I've noticed "spotting" over the last few months which I never noticed before. But then I never used to inspect the loo roll with so much vigour - nor stick my fingers up my fanjo to double check. When I got my BFP my signals were so obvious to me - but from what I read around it's different for every single woman in every single pregnancy.

Bessie Lots of hugs 'n' gin from me too. You can cuddle my ponee if you like?

Poor camel that's a bit rough, I'm amazed you feel so positive for CD1, CD2 has me "normal" again, CD1 I'm always a wailing banshee - you know, much rending of cloth etc.

keeping my fingers crossed for you Scorp,

and big hugs to Bessie

Peckers up girls, we're not dead yet.

Although it was touch and go this morning - went round to new neighbours for a drink last night. Six hours later we were ringing stepson to let us in. This morning I was practically dead and I only officially got up 40 mins ago. I haven't felt this chronic from drinking for as long as I can remember

ski Have had had DAYS of spotting (since Wednesday) to be positive. Was really bored with the wait, now I have a whole new cycle to babyfail!

So, apart from the grey-faced, dt-suffering extrog who clearly had a good night, how has everyone's weekend been? Have you only peed on a stick once, scorp? and did you get out the biro?

Couldn't tell you if it was a good night or not, all I remember is the guy lent me a book on Iranian politics and we found out the precise location of our air raid shelter

Everything else is just a blur. What must they think of us. Outstayed our welcome and drunk all their wine

Helloooo again all

Not been online for 2 weeks due to holiday and much prancing around the country. Now at Heathrow getting another skinfull of airport gin and catching up on the BESH madness. Tis lovely to be slagged off remembered even when I'm not around - cheers y'all. Congrats to kim and big commissies to Bessie - it truly sucks but it does get better eventually...

Have had 2 weeks of muchas booze while buying lots of new clothes and expensive bits for my mountain bike - that surely alone should make me diffed, no? On the other hand though have pretty much forgotten the madness with all the hectic holidaying which has been v refreshing - nice to reset and after spent 3 weeks pretending 'I haven't really thought about it yet' to the many newly mothered friends then I've convinced myself that's the case. So it feels like we're just starting trying - will see if the madness stays away once we're back in the old routine... (err, no, unlikely...)

Anyway you lushes are probably all getting set for a night on the gin so will be back again the other side of a 16 hour journey....

EEEKKK! Who sung "whaddya mean we need a break from the old routine" in that song that I can't remember the name of? There is a sleepless night in the offing if I don't get the answer.... Come on BESHies, this is our era!!

here you go, CunTuesday. Some googling, and it is Oui 3

www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDLsPwrOOhA

Hello longsmellsofwee! Good to see you want us again now you've had mucho fun with your RL pals Nah, not really! Nice to hear you've had such a great time. Booze, new clothes and gear for strenuous activity are all excellent routes to ironic updiff.

Thanks to everyone for being so tolerant of my 'braaaahn bits' waffling over the last few days. I hope I haven't offended you, Bessie, as I realise my 'R2D2 or not R2D2 - that is the question' fretting is nothing compared to what you're going through. I'm 95% sure it's just a long and weird run-up to a RTOD and the droid will come a-beeping tomorrow or so. Especially as I've been sweaty and mardy (even more so than usual) since afternoon, which is a prime R2 signal. But I've also realised something else - it's much easier to fret myself into a eppo with TWOOFLing than to think about why, at nearly 37 and finally TTC, my menstrual cycle seems to be changing and going non-textbook after a 20+ year run of absolute predictability...

PS Cunty - good to see you giving us BESHes a good name