Oh shit desperately fighting tears reading all your posts.. Where to start? MLS indeed what a fucking week for you with edd as well.. With you on ungrateful preg people, makes my blood boil, also gushing new mums (a'la bf) who seem to totally forget our mc & how hard it is.. Im really praying hard that all will be well for you in the end, but the emotional headfuck this has caused you is appalling & all we can do is hug you & sadly empathise..
Lovelylovelysuperwomanmermaid you quietly let your edd pass by without telling, wish id known to hold your hand, that means we were due at same time? So I bleated on about my edd & it was yours too? No wonder you're p'd off at family cos sounds like you tried to deal with it all on your own, none of my family or friends remember either, not even a tx, thats why I feel all bitter & angry today cos you girls iv not even met have supported more than them & it hurts doesnt it? Sorry you feel so shitty today but voice of experience is that we bottle things up but eventually the lids need to come off.. No need to be so brave, this is what our site is for... Totally know scared to cry cos may not stop, & scared of never finding me again too. On dads birthday it was like his sprit was in me reminding me of who I was - v much like him, full of positive energy, a giver & a do'er, always smiling, as I drove to work this morning I felt so sad that reminder only lasted the one day & here I am back to grey again... Oh, & not leaving work, just my beloved dept
MM you & Mermaid have both made me feel so much less embarassed at my feelings towards friends, they dont tell you about the effect on your relationships do they? I resent that ive supported my oldest bf thru all her neurosis & anger & self inflicted crap, yet nothing back now I need it. Some friendships are 1 way streets I guess. The bf with new dd was the one that suprised me with support & right words thru first 3mc, but we both fell preg in jan, I lost mine & the uncomfortableness started on both sides. Now as mermaids mentioned before after call yest, its like she doesnt want to hear it in case she catches it, tinged with smugness and pity at her childless friend.
Bakingq as much as you all wouldnt know it I absolutely hate self pity, but theres a difference between that & having people acknowledge what we've been through & the feelings we have... thank you for understanding & giving the licence to vent, I feel embarassed cos Im not after sympathy, I just need to get it out & you understand that so thank you... xxx
Well, I dont know whether to say Im glad we are not alone in our greyness today, obviously Id prefer if we were all happy chatty emmsys but this is our reality & im so pleased we can share it with each other - I love you all to the core, you mean the world to me xxxxxxxxxxxxxx