Mid 30's TTC - you're my BESH mate you are..... <hic hic>

[extremesitting]

OOOh - Hope this'll do! Emergency!

Yup, longwee, sounds like a plan.

It's my round - what are people drinking? I'll have an enormous port and lemon, seeing as it's autumn.

Hey hag good to see you! Welcome home.

cosmo I'll take your GTOD and raise you a huge car tyre of a blister encircling the skintag (sounds a bit like ginhag... hmmmm) I had frozen off from my belly last Friday. Was out on an interminable walk at the weekend, culminating in a flop down in a pub - thought I'd been sweating like a pig only to find, when I took my cagoule off, that the damn thing has burst and had coated me, and everyone I know, in blister-goo.

triggerhappyblister Cagoule and blister-goo. Stylish.

Extreme needs to whinge (how unusual!)

Dream job with dream company have been keeping me waiting. Initially decision was due in last Wednesday. Forward a week and a bit and it appears I am down to the final three. Decision due tomorrow. 3? 3?!!

I'm not usually a cocky person (and thats a serious understatement) but for once in my life I really thought I had it nailed. 3?! I've got no hope!!!!

Luckily whatever the outcome I'll be buggering off for a couple of weeks, so I can either hospitalise myself with gin consumption or I can chill, safe in the knowledge I have something (bar you lot) to look forward to on my return.... dramatic... me?!

PS: loving the puss story. I also have had a pussy lump on my delicate flower. You may find you need to revisit it a couple of times to make sure it is thoroughly emptied mind!!

Dancing Queen, young & sweet, only seventeeeeeeeen ............

Ooooo oooooo

Any more gin going?

cosmosis Ewww, eww, fanjo-boil-green-lake-of-pus tale. [vomit]

extreme If they don't hire you they are mental and have germs. That's my expert opinion.

Me - I had a Barbie but I hated her. For books it was Jill and her ponies all the way! And a good dose of Pullein-Thompson sisters thrown in for good measure too. 'Janet Must Ride' etc etc. Jolly riding crops, yar yar, foil the pony smugglers, win 1st prize in the under-16 jumping, and finish with a smashing tea!

If we are talking horses then I'm afraid I have but one thing to say: "My friend Flicka".

Barbie was a cheap whore. I never liked her (but for the 50's version).

Sindy had a slightly chubbier face. Chubby faces make me feel better.

Cosmo, this one's for you kid! It just keeps giving... literally!

www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=117253032122&ref=nf

Ahh yes, Flicka!

If anyone is interested in Daily Mail-gate, here is my sorry tale. I am SOOO ANGRYYYY!! :

A few days ago I posted on a mad thread about what to wear at the school gate, relating a bonkers conversation I had had with a neighbour, and then suggesting a very tongue-in-check list of what is and isn't acceptable attire for mummies. I thought it was obvious I was poking fun but several posters took my post seriously, and said things like 'How dare you say a Tesco uniform is not acceptable,' etc. I thought to myself, right in future I need to make it more obvious when I am joking, and add lots of obvious wink wink emoticons etc. End of story. No harm done.

That is... until the Daily Mail lifted it and published it in their hateful rag yesterday!

How can MN have anything to do with a newspaper which supported the fascists with headlines like 'Hurrah for the Blackshirts', and whose editors were mates with Hitler and Mussolini? Not to mention their current stance on working mums and immigrants. I feel so dirty. Yuck, yuck, yuck.

Please everyone - if you agree with me go to the Mumsnet DM poll and vote 'Not under any circumstances' for the Daily Mail alliance. The link is on the right under the heading 'Mumsnet latest'. Otherwise next week it could be you, seeing your latest drunken MN post immortalised by that pile of bottom sewage.

Rant over. As you were.

Pony Have already voted Over My Dead Body on the DM poll. But great rant.

Excellent rant. They'll probably post that one tomorrow (without highlighting friendships with murderous bastards).

Fuck'em Pony. We know youz alriiight innit! x

FFS, now you've got me worried! signed Ponymumrefusestobequotedbythedailymail.

CUNTS! No, not our primary obsession, but The Daily Mail. I genuinely think people should write to other newspapers, like The Grauniad and The Independent, and tell them what the Daily Heil is up to. Unless, of course, it just gives them ideas of their own - they had a fun article quoting from the MN preggers book in the G2 today. It might be a public forum, but that doesn't mean that scumbag journos can quote us anywhere they like and make it sound like we've agreed to it. Well, it probably does, but they still shouldn't. CUNTS!

Hellooooo gin! Sorry about the babyfail There, does that make things better?

trig - that was a truly awesome pus move; did you film the pus-splosion by any chance? I think you and cosmo may have stumbled upon an as-yet untapped niche market in the porn industry...

I'm fed up with being a grown-up; it's crap. Let's canter round the Palace pretending to be ponies for a good half hour, then dress up and re-enact Fame (don't tell me you didn't use to do that at your schools )! Bagsy being CoCo!!!

(Though am clearly Doris in reality )

PS I know some laydeez don't like the 'C' word, but, erm, I do. Soz.

Me too, you cunt.

If we write 'cunt' often enough it's unlikely (cunt) that the Maul (cunt)will ever be able to (cunt) use anything from this (cunt) thread cunty cunty cuntchops.

Ps sorry scorp not mad keen on the ponies/fame idea,mind if I just get a round in while you lot get on with the cantering?

I will point and laugh obviously.

Oops nearly forgot cuntcuntcuntcunt

gin I wasn't keen on ponies as a child (or should that be 'OMG ponieez 1111!!!one!!!'? ) but I'm trying to think of something for everyone. We could also play elastics, if you'd prefer? British Bulldog? Red Rover? Get the Girl's World out for a styling sesh?

CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNTS! (not you lot, I hasten to add!)

OOOh... can I crimp someone's hair and put it in a side pony?!

Not sure if I've regressed too far here..I spent the afternoon in a den made from an old duvet,reading mr men books and 'brumming' cars...

me first being crimped extreme! am now teary eyed with nostalgia and feel about a zillion years old.

By the way extremehairstyles how long have you lived in El Brizz?

that sucks, extreme. I voted Not at all yesterday.

I'm not a big fan of cunt being used to refer to anything but a woman's fanny - I dislike it being used as a derogatory term. Reclaim the cunt!

oh, sorry, I meant Ponymum!

I just looked at that video, couldn't watch it at work.

Although I feel cheated, mine was not nearly so forthcoming. However mine does gain points for having green gunk.

For about five of your earth years Gin How long you been here? I find it a wonderful place to be, though I do get a bit p**d off with the posh Landrover driving, sushi eating dahlings that live around me. I buy Sainsburys orange label, they buy foie gras. Spoilt cunts.

I used to hate the term cunts, when I was young and a lady. Now I am a wrinkly fat bag I love it. I refer to everyone as cunts. Even people I like.

Glad you enjoyed it!