Emmsy's onwards and upwards part five.....white coats and pee sticks at the ready for more BFP's

[VJaybigpants]

Here we go a shiny new thread.....

Awake with my demons. Wish I had some horse tranquillisers. Funny how one minute your life is going in one direction & you are so wonderfully oblivious to the pain that is just around the corner. Everything that you wanted & expected to happen is snatched from you in a heartbeat.

Could somebody please move my name from the medium pants list the next time it is updated, thanks.

mls can't sleep either, gracie will probably be along in a bit too.
It is bitter all this life stuff, other events, lost friends and loved ones has made me realise over the last few years how precious every moment is. I know you know that more than most lovely lady.
Its mourning the lost dreams which is the hardest.

MLS I must have just missed you, on my last pace I went back to bed at 1am. I really hope you've managed to get to sleep by now.

Waves to mermaid.

MLS I really wish there was something I could say or do to ease your pain. You've been so much support to me and now I feel helpless in helping you.

Hi all. This is the first chance I've had to get on here since yesterday lunchtime.Sorry.

MLS You are constantly in my thoughts. You were the first thing I spoke to my DH about when he came home from work yesterday and I was out with my mum last night and cried telling her about you. I echo what Gracie said. You've been my rock through all this. Your posts,emails and texts have kept me sane, made me smile and reminded me that someone DOES understand. I'm so and that this had to happen to you and feel so frustrated that I can't do anything to ease your pain. I hope all the messages on here and by text have gone some way to help and to show you how much we all love you. Take care. You are strong and we're all here for you whenever for whatever. I hope the clouds part for you soon and a tiny bit of sunshine comes back into your life.

Curly I was so pleased to hear your news yesterday and I'm sorry that the sadness has meant your joy has been a little overlooked. It's lovely that you are over another hurdle in the rest. Tuck that bean in tight.

Went to cinema last night to see "My sister's Keeper" Read the book a few years ago so knew I'd be sobbing. I was, but only partly because of the film.

I hope everyone else is well and finding something to smile about today.

Morning Neeko, I didn't know that book was out as a film, I read the book too a real weeper.

Hi Gracie Yes but they have totally changed the ending which was IMO the best part of the book. Mum and I were quite but it was still a sobfest.
Is your pain easing at all?

I was up about 00:30, 3am and 5am, so not much luck last night. I'm getting used to it now though and just sleep during the day for a bit. At some point soon I'm going to have to go back to work I think, not quite sure how I'll manage at work.

hiya, how are you mls, I will get the list sorted in a mo, hope you are resting xxx

gracie when you do go back to work can you have a risk assessment done and maybe get your duties reduced?

Small pants
babyinacorner ttc#2 cd45
Sophable ttc#1 cd34
Kate ttc#1 cd32
gingermumi ttc#4 cd22
cupcakefairy ttc#1 cd17
mermaid ttc#2 cd13
Neeko ttc#2 cd 11
iggypiggy ttc#1 cd 10
Jools ttc#1 cd6
becks ttc#2 cd?
bakingqueen ttc#1 cd 5
4ever ttc#1 cd2
MLS

On a break?
cupoftea
littlebellsmum

Medium pants
Barbie
Curly BFP 4th June
GracieGirl BFP 30th May
Scorpio
MM

Big pants

Lionstarbigpants due 26/09/09
VJay bigpants due 26/08/09
Sabsbigpants due 26/09/09
Anniebigpants due 1/12/09
Molliemooma due 16/12/09
Bluesatinsash due 18/12/09

I've tried to update it but just check your dates, I'm probably wrong. Shouldn't mm and scorpio be bigpanters now?

Hey it's quiet in here today, hope that means people are out enjoying the sunshine

Moon sorry I missed you last night. I'm glad you're feeling better and got a good nights sleep. I hope you have some nice plans to spoil yourself this weekend xxx

gracie I was reading that fennel tea might help with the pain but I think that you have to take in moderation as excessive amounts are not good in pregnancy. It might be worth looking into anyway

neeko I'm so glad you're back, your posts are always so lovely.

MLS I wish I could find the words. All I can say is that this awful time will pass and things won't always feel so hopeless Is there any way that you could go back to the hospital sooner? It is hard enough dealing with the grief without being in limbo. I am sending you the most massive hug and some homemade icecream xxx

Wave to VJ cross posted cos I took so long to write my post

how are the energy levels? Are the iron tablets working ok?

hi curly, I'm not too bad thanks,, I did the food shopping today for the first time in ages (DH has been doing it), and I did quite well, but bloody knackered now .
My fab SIL rang me earlier and said she is planning a visit for a couple of days when I'm about 8 months, but she is insisting on staying in a B&B, and I am so grateful to her of thinking of this. Usually we put people up but I just stand the thought of doing this now. She has not long had her 3rd baby so knows what it is like, I just hope others follow her lead

Your SIL sounds lovely. I confess I wouldn't have considered such a thing before

Now put your feet up young lady and have a nice cool drink

I'm going to head down to greenwich market and have lunch out. No chance it will stay down, but I might as well enjoy the eating part

lots of love to everyone xxx

Have a lovely lunch curly

Hello everyone, im in work today until 9pm which will mean leaving at 9.45 still no news re shorter hours and im getting pissed off now due to being so tired. Im going to chase it up tomorrow.

Went out for dh brunch, champayne and spirits on tap for a full 3 hours with fab food. V posh hotel but come 3,30pm it was carnage, people stripping, dancing on tables etc etc quite a sight too see when you are stone cold sober! Was great, dh really enjoyed himself and is paying the price. He lasted until 8pm so a full 8 hours..we ended up clubbing after and its strange with it being day light! totally knackered so had to laeve early and thankfully dh saw sense and came with me before being sick out of the side of the car as was were driving...um nice!

Was going to catch up last night while dh slept on the sofa but mls news really floored me, ended up crying for hours...bought it home how far i still have to go and how much i wanted her to have a happy ending. There was nothing i could of written or posted to take the pain away so instead i curled up in bed and wished her happy thoughts....

Went to book me scan, and would you believe it the only time and date open is thursday..fate or what. Panicked and asked about having a d and c if needed but the receptionist laughed and said i would be fine ill take it each day at the time..

feeling sicker the last few days so im hoping this is a good thing.

The cat is out of the bag now due to the host yesterday asking which of the part is preganant as i had to have a different drinks menu...oh well what will be will be...

Ill catch up with you all tomorrow xxx

bad grammer due to rushing in work

with everything that's going on at the moment, does anyone mind if I have an e-meltdown?

lol go ahead hopingalways its always crazy in here!!!

Are you ok hoping? Of course you can have a meltdown, this is just the place

Evening ladies. Just caught up on the last few days news.
So so sorry to hear your news MLS, my heart was in my mouth reading, then i got to the really sad bit . Life is so unfair, the big man above needs to give the ladies on here a break. Sending big hug to you and DH.

Ive read everyones news, sorry i havent got chance to write massive post tonight, but you are all in my thoughts as always. Hope those that are due to test soon get good news, the ladies who AF has got get good news next month, all the medium pants and big pant wearers are well as can be.

Sorry Curly-forgot to say im so happy that your scan went well yesterday X

Evening all.

Hoping people having meltdowns are always welcome.

Just spoke to MrsKate she won't be testing tomorrow now as AF got her today, she says to let you know so the list can be up to date.

Vjay yes you are right I should talk to my manager about a risk assessment before I go back to work.

Big hug for MLS. Curly I hope you enjoyed your lunch.

Evening ladies!
Well it's taken me hours to catch up with you all but I'm just about emerging and this will probably be a mammoth post! I echo what MLS said about it being like reading a novel you know the end to as I'd been kept up to date with news (thanks soooo much Neeko, Gracie, Curly, Iggy and 4ever! I really appreciated it...and DH and the friends we were on hol with kept asking to hear the updates too, haha!) Missed you all loads and glad to be back. Felt tearful reading what you've all been writing about how much this forum means to you all - I feel the same and am so glad I found you ladies! Very glad to see my 'something that made you smile today' theory in use and hair-stroking while I was away too!

Ok, here goes-

Let me firstly say MLS I was so so sorry to hear your news yesterday. It truly is crap and I especially feel for you in the limbo stage; I hated that. Hope dd lets you get some sleep. How is your dh dealing with it? Big hugs to you.

Barbie, Curly and Gracie, was so pleased to hear about the good news for all of you. Hope you're all taking care of yourselves and bulk-ordering that cotton wool to wrap yourselves in.

4ever, lovely lovely lady, I was so sad reading about the hard time you've been having sorry for BFN and AF. Next month is the one! I'm amazed at how supportive and understanding you are to everyone on this thread even in your toughest times - it wouldn't be the same without you!
Sorry I didn't bring back the vat of vodka by the way, couldn't get it through customs fancy a french biscuit instead??

Kate, I don't know if you're lurking but just wanted to say hi, and hope you are having some lovely quality time with dh. Sorry about AF But remember LovelyCurly's mantra - af is potential first day of pregnancy! Same for you BakingQueen sorry tew got you too.

Cupoftea so so sorry about your dh's job I know you were upset that he'd been having doubts about ttc before that too so you must be finding this so hard. Hoping we'll see you again before too long.

Mollie how horrible about your scare! Hope you are more relaxed now. Maybe you should hot foot it over to mermaid's drinking den greenhouse to hide away for a while! Loving the sex ban comment too I should tell my dh to appreciate all the bd right now as I'm sure I'll be the same for 9 months once I'm pg!! our poor boys.

Mermaid, so glad you finally got a consultant's appointment! Here's hoping or some answers for you. Not long to wait. How's the bd action plan going??

Moon sorry to hear you've been so low but as others have said, it is a whole other stage to get through, going back to work and reality. Well done for getting through it. Thinking of you.

Annie again, hugs for you feeling sad around fathers day as I've said before, I'm amazed at you getting through everything you have without your parents around and still sounding so positive...chin up.

Hoping go for it- have a meltdown! We're all here. The whole 'we'll never have kids' thing hits me when least expected and makes me cry...and I've only mc'd once; so you are very entitled to meltdowns! Hit us with them...

Iggy is on hols now I know...but just cos I'll forget to ask her otherwise-
How was Oliver?? We saw it in March, Rowan Atkinson is just brill isn't he? Which Oliver did you get?
Also, I'm in exact same situation with my job! Lovely people, but bored, want to leave, but waiting to get pg..don't want to apply for other jobs incase I have to leave immediately when pg..silly. And again, cry all you want over the mc. People in rl expect us not to still be upset about it (my BF is the only one who still asks how I am about it) but it's really ok to be...I think we always will be to some degree.

Lionstar hope you're enjoying hols!

VJay so glad iron tablets are helping and WOW 9 weeks!! It'll be so exciting to have our first Emmsy's baby.

And hello to all you other lovely ladies!

PHEW! Told you this would be mammoth..

Our holidays were just lovely - sunshine, food, wine, READING (my favourite thing), and a LOT of gourmet bd I think I ov'd yesterday and have a v good feeling we caught that little egg! We'll see.

Bit of an eventful journey home as everyone was evacuated from Toulouse airport (turned out to be nothing serious) then complications with an air hostess getting ill and a boy with 2 broken arms being chucked off plane cos he wasn't certified fit to fly... we were v delayed but back in one piece!

Better hit send as I can see you're all falling asleep
It's very good to be back.

Wow Cupcake that's a nice long post! I'm pleased you had a nice holiday but I'm more pleased you're home, I missed you!! Your "something that made me smile today" technique is great! My DH is the same he asks about you all when he comes home.

Just passing through whilst pacing round my house again.