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Conception

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Assisted conception (and the bits in between!) - part 3 - all welcome

1000 replies

Caitni · 27/05/2009 12:00

Right ladies, time for a new thread.

And a big welcome to everyone . Here's to many more success stories and healthy pregnancies!

OP posts:
islegrin · 09/09/2009 00:33

NPA Still have everything crossed for you, just a few more days now! I'll be thinking of you on Friday (as I'm preparing to be knocked out for the first time in my life)

SUPEREMBY!

LL Another move, more travel, you are my hero. How is your CTS? Any better with the nettle tea?

Bumpless do what you need to do girl - even if that includes lurking. I was wondering how long it would take to laugh at me stabbing myself! Here's another one (nothing to do with ttc, though)- I sat talking to a friend on Sunday afternoon, under an awning - so it was shaded... we learn to hide from the sun around here because it's so intense. That night, I was watching tv and had my hand on my thigh and I thought - weird this one area is hot and the rest is cold (of course I immediately wondered if it was a symptom of stimming - but I told my self I was being silly) Then my DH says - wow - you really burned yourself. Turns out 1/4 of my thigh is sunburned, very neatly 1/4 with a line from my shorts and a line from the table at which I was sitting!!! I should have known better!

I know exactly what you mean about thinking about this all the time, I'm already in the what do we do of various outcomes... I'm really trying to keep a lid on it, but DH is better at that than I am. Go figure. All the best to you, no matter what you decide.

Caitni Ireland, now the States... I'm jealous of your travel schedule. Although I must admit I'm not sure how much I'll want to travel if I get pg. Just something about being stuck in an airplane for at least 5 hrs that doesn't sit well with me. Here in the US one plane got grounded and they kept the passengers on the plane for 5 hours or something like that - trapped! Due to "policy" --- so frustrating, what the fear of lawsuits has brought! But I'm sure that won't happen to you. Enjoy your travels!!!

Gingerwine glad to hear you are moving forward on the interview process, I'm sure you will find something that suits you perfectly!

KC11 Yep, you're first - then I think it's Sooty. I'll be going in Friday evening your time (Friday morning my time). I'm so glad you are going ahead, and I hope we all finally get our BFP!

Sooty I had a good laugh about your DH on morning duty - because mine will be the same, I'm the night owl and he goes to bed at 8pm (gets up at 3:30 am). Figure if we have a baby, that kind of shift work will come in handy! Everything crossed for you as well!

--- I guess today was my last scan. Some of the follies have caught up and they are all getting into the good size range 19-20mm - Doc wants to give them one more day of meds and time and trigger me tomorrow, for EC on Friday. She is pretty happy with the overall outcome and she gave me a very big compliment: "You are so calm - you are really doing well at handling all of this." UMMM CALM??? Ok, well I try to keep it in check. and they want me to eat a lot of protein for a few days... so much for the veg diet this week. DH is so happy I asked him out for steak tonight! It does take so little to make him very happy - every woman should be so lucky!

xx

londonlottie · 09/09/2009 10:25

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NotPrincessAnne · 09/09/2009 12:02

Best of luck for egg collection today KC11 I hope it all goes smoothly, and the results are good! And for you too tomorrow Islegrin!

I am still all over the place as I wait for Friday - official test day. Still no sign of AF, but I did a test this morning as I was in such a flap about it all and it was negative. So now I'm utterly in a quandary. It is an either or situation, isn't it? In that either I'm pregnant, and if so no AF; or I'm not and AF should be here now or arriving soon?? How long after ET can it take to arrive? (I would really rather not google! ). I keep wondering what on earth I'll do if there's still no AF by Friday, and I test again, but it's still BFN. Gah!

Bumpless · 09/09/2009 12:32

NPA I'm taking deep calming breaths for you. Nothing to tell you that you don't already know - could be too early for a BFP to show, AF seems to be able to turn up anywhere from halfway through the 2WW to a week after it, and the progesterone makes it unpredictable. Still rooting for your superembie, you're pregnant till Friday at least!

Poor LL , can imagine what a wrench it must have been to pack up your whole life for two years, especially when you're going through such a mind-blowing thing as having twins! As soon as you're in your new place and meeting neighbours and gettig plugged into the new baby network I bet you'll revert to being really excited to be there. Haven't done ZW before, this was a recommendation from my acupuncturist who's affiliated to them, because I struggle with immune issues a bit and she thinks they might be able to help. Can't hurt (apart from in the wallet). I'm enjoying the odd therapeutic drink at the moment and would quite like to continue, I must say!

KC11 very best of luck, looking forward to hearing how it went!

Islegrin you sound like you're doing IVF like a complete pro! Loved the sunburn story. I have what DH calls my 'gardening strip', the gap between shorts and T-shirt that always burns, no matter what you do, when you're doing stuff like gardening. Mine has been so regularly burned I now have permanent freckles across my lower back! I'm so glad to hear you sounding so up beat, energetic and positive - I have a really good feeling about your cycle! Enjoy that steak...

Sootie something you said has been sticking with me, about giving cycles everything as part of the walking away process. I'm trying to reframe all our attempts as 'we've done everything we could' rather than 'almost there, one more push' to see if it makes it any easier to reach decisions.

Hugs to all, happy travels Caitni, and good luck for the sequence of ECs!

islegrin · 09/09/2009 18:43

LL I also try to use humor to difuse situations so it helps put the doc and nurses at ease as well as myself.

Sooty and Bumpless underneath, I'm preparing to let it all go too. Even though so far this cycle has been good - if it doesn't take we'll have a hard time trying to piece together a second attempt. Our only last ditch effort would be a FET - but that's only if we are lucky enough to have any embryos to freeze. I know that's not likely, so I'm keeping that possibilty of travel and footloose/fancy free in my head. I have to keep my head as level as it can be and positive either way.

I'm a bit worried how I will see my upper right buttock to give myself the HCG shot today!

xx

sootykalucy · 10/09/2009 00:51

Hang in there NPA, it's not over till it's over.

Good luck tommorrow Islegrin, sounds like this cycle is going really well for you.

Where are you Duplo? I'm worrying that your cycle has been abandoned and you've gone underground. Fair enough if you have, but we're still thinking of you.

LL I have one pieced of advice about moving countries - don't think about it for at least six months! Just don't go there, don't pick over it . . .just be there, and in six months time you will either feel at home, or not - and then you can make a different decision. Thats my strategy and I'm sticking to it. I have just passed the six month mark here and it's been good, but it's ALWAYS complicated at first whether the move turns out to be a good one or a mistake.

I am on my 'No Drugs' day - EC tomorrow - Friday my time. Had my last scan which wasn't very positive. Left has only got one now 18mm, and the right had one but only 9mm. Like Islegrin too dysynchronous. Anyway it was frustrating as one on each side would have doubled my chances whereas two on the left woudldn't have (with my one egg per side problem). Ho hum. If I get one embryo in I will be happy with this cycle.

sootykalucy · 10/09/2009 03:39

Hope it all went well KC11.

I've just booked an accupunture session for after EC, I know it's more the transfer that counts but I felt like I might deserve the attention, low lights and soft music.

Caitni · 10/09/2009 11:30

NPA sorry to hear of the BFN but am hoping it's just too early to show positive. I know a woman who had two rounds of IVF, tested negative until quite late (16-17 days past EC) and then tested positive. Am still keeping my fingers crossed for you xxx

KC hope EC went well.

Sooty sorry to hear the latest scan wasn't great. Good luck for EC - I hope you get that one embryo that you want and deserver. Also keeping fingers crossed for you.

Islegrin hope that humour stays good (helped me too - if the nurses/doctors/sonographers were relaxed then I was too!) and good luck for EC.

Duplo to echo Sooty hope you're doing OK and thinking of you (and hoping things are going well for you)

Bumpless I've heard very good things about the ZW nutritionists (I think Mowmi saw someone there?) so hope they fit you in again soon. I'm a fan of ZW generally, as I find her attitude to assisted conception so much more knowledgeable and sympathetic than the horrible Marilyn Glenville (who's natural solutions to infertility is aan awful book in my humble opinion!). Good luck with the mental rebooting (sorry, not sure what else to call trying to reframe things and in a bit of a rush typing this at work!).

Lottie your description of City Airport almost had me in tears . It is such a momentous thing you're doing...and it sounds very adventurous to me but then all my best adventures have involved regular emotional meltdowns .

Big big waves to everyone else. Am off to heathrow after work and not back from the States until 27th Sept. Am so looking forward to a break but man, I have heaps of work still to do. Am almost in denial about it! Anyway, hope to get in to good news while I'm off

xxx

OP posts:
islegrin · 10/09/2009 18:37

KC11 Thinking of you - hope EC went well today and please let us know when you hear more from the clinic about fertilization. Take it easy and rest.

Sooty You are next up for tomorrow, I hope you are nice and relaxed, don't fret about one or two - if it works, it only needs to take one! Just focus on that. Hope everything goes well and can't wait to hear how it went.

Duplo I've likewise been thinking maybe you went underground - and even if you have, we're thinking of you and support you.

Well - my time will be late Friday night for most of you, nearly midnight. Trying to stay calm and breathe. It's hard to imagine that fertilization will actually take place tomorrow, if it does! Just on pills today, no telling what all they'll give me tomorrow.

I'm nervous, but that's to be expected - there is a lot riding on the next few days.

Waves to all!
xx

gingerwine · 10/09/2009 21:03

Hi everyone. Hope you are all ok.

KC11 - I hope EC went ok yesterday and that you are resting and feeling ok.

Sooty and Islegrin - All the best and I wish you so much luck with your ECs. Stay calm and chilled if possible. Try repeating what an antenatal yoga teacher once taught me "All will be well, all will be well and all manner of things will be well." She said it in that lovely soporific voice that yoga teachers have but I've found it useful a few times.

Duplo - Hope you are doing ok.

NPA - I have everything crossed for you. Good luck.

Well the news here is I got the job!! Hooray!! It's all very exciting and a bit unreal to be honest. I will not be starting work for about 8 or 9 weeks or so which means with any luck we will have done our IVF cycle first. Time for a glass of sparkly rose here. Thankyou to all of you for your encouragement. I really feel I have done something positive and constructive. I am feeling a lot more relaxed about IVF and TTC as a result.

Hi to anyone I haven't mentioned.

islegrin · 11/09/2009 00:02

Congrats gingerwine!!! Enjoy your glass of rose and I'm glad to hear that this helps put you at ease about the other IVF/ttc issues. Funny how things work isn't it?

Great news!!!

sootykalucy · 11/09/2009 04:45

Well EC was a bit of a farce, we were all wired up and the Dr went in with a scan - and we'd missed it!

Dr reckons we only missed by an hour or so, but it was hugely disapointing. Somehow though I had had an inkling of it because I couldn't sleep all night and was more annoyed than excited about the prospect of EC. Rationally I was worried that the one egg wouldn't fertilize but I think I felt different physically.

Anyway, they told us to go home and have sex, which we did, but not with any great hope having missed the boat and all. I'm not sure what they'll charge us . . . I don't really blame the Dr - we did everything the same as the last cycle, the follie just jumped! Bad luck strikes again.

islegrin · 11/09/2009 09:17

I've never heard of that - what a letdown, so sorry sooty at least you got to have a little fun at home. It would serve them right if you got pg anyway! Rotten experts!!!

How very mature of you not to blame the doc ~ I think I'd like to smack mine if that happened! I wonder if they will do a scan before they knock me out? Oh well - I'll just try to go with the flow... maybe mine will be a big wipeout! ;)

NotPrincessAnne · 11/09/2009 09:53

Oh no Sooty, what a nightmare! You must have felt so frustrated. Bad luck is right, the trouble is we are all different and things don't always work out they way they should.

Congratulations on the job, Gingerwine! That's excellent news. It must be good having something so positive to focus on.

Best wishes Islegrin and KC11. will be looking forward to hearing you you go.

I tested again this morning and it was a BFN again. I was expecting it, really, after Wednesday's test - I had a horrible day that day, which ended up being a good thing really as I meant this morning I was ready for confirmation. I just want AF to appear now so I can draw a line under this cycle. I have to go out tomorrow for FIL's birthday party, which will involve a lot of fussing over SIL who is 8 months pregnant with the first grandchild, which I am not looking forward to, but I think it is one of those things that will be worse in the expectation than the reality.

We've been doing a lot of talking this week, and have decided that we're going to move onto donor eggs rather than try again myself. I just feel that we could waste an awful lot of time, money and emotional energy desperately trying to have a baby with my eggs, when the chances are never going to be good, when what we really want is a family, and the best chance of getting that is to go down the donor route. So I'll wait for my follow up appointment with my specialist, and discuss it with him then.

londonlottie · 11/09/2009 16:45

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Issy42 · 11/09/2009 22:45

Just popping on rather belatedly to say congratulations to Flibberty.

Apologies for disappearing off the thread. I left for a week for Glastonbury and never managed to catch back up.

Congrats on the move to Switzerland and on the girls Lottie - I'm having a girl too.

Good luck to everyone going through cycles at the moment.

duplomania · 11/09/2009 23:11

Oh no sooty, I'm so sorry about what happened, what a nightmare! life can be so unfair sometimes! sending you a big (((hug))).

How disappointing about your bfn NPA. I was so rooting for your superembie. I'm glad you have a plan for the future, I have been thinking about donor eggs a lot too, I think it's a good option to have. Hope you don't find the family gathering too difficult, do they know what situation you are in?

Hi islegrin, by the time you read this you'll have had your EC over and done with. wishing you all the best!!

How was your EC KC11, it was yesterday wasn't it? hope you had some good news today.

Congratulations about the job gingerwine! that's excellent news. I think it's so important to have things to look forward to outside of the whole ivf business, and I'm glad to hear you're feeling better already.

Looks like you may have an eventful NYE ahead of you lottie! How do you like your new gynae?

so sweet of you to worry about me everyone, I feel really bad now that I haven't been online. the reason is I have been insanely busy, trying to work extra hours to make up for the 3hour scan and bloods sessions (they are really slow at uch) and interviewing nannies in the evening. On top of that I had friends staying round the last 3 days. I was actually quite grateful for the distraction, saved me from fretting about my poor response, but now I'm shattered. I think the drugs make me feel more tired too.

Had my final scan today, I have 3 follicles at 14, 17 and 18 mm. they think all three will be ready on monday, so will have ec at 8am on Mon.
The funny thing is I only have one follie more than last time, but since the drs expectations (and mine) have been so low this time they all act like this is a massive achievement which makes me feel much better than last time round.
Still haven't decided whether to do gift or ivf, the drs say that fertilization rates are better with gift and so they recommend it for poor responders, but my problem is if it fails I will not even know if my eggs have fertilized. difficult.

islegrin · 12/09/2009 09:04

NPA so sorry about the BFN - I'm still deluding myself that it's still just too early??? Big hugs - glad to see you are looking forward already.

Duplo it's so sweet that everyone is rooting for you and your 3 follies. Best of luck for Monday's EC - it only takes one to stick! Keep thinking positively. Sorry for being ignorant, but what is gift? I understand wanting to know how many fertilize - I can't wait to hear our numbers tomorrow!

All went well today on EC, I had a couple of tense moments, but then regained my "go with the flow" attitude. DH helped a lot. Sore now, but to be expected. Will know sometime tomorrow how many fertilized. (fingers crossed) but we still have a few hurdles to go and a VERY LONG TWW.

Thanks for all of your well wishes.
xx

gingerwine · 12/09/2009 14:10

Sooty - I can't believe that. I am hoping that nature will be kind to you and your "homework" was successful! I hope they do offer to do a repeat cycle. It's such a let down after all the stims etc..

NPA - I'm so sorry it was a BFN. My DH was asaking about superembie last night. He was routing for you too. I too am still hoping it's too early but I think you are sensible to think ahead. Big hugs.

Londonlottie - New Years Eve!!! Of course all that matters is that they arrive safely but it's an odd day to choose IMO. Perhaps the Swiss do not really party at New Year!

Duplo - Loads of luck and best wishes for Monday.

Islegrin - Glad to hear all went OK. Looking forward to hearing how fertilization has gone. Fingers crossed.

I was wondering what happens if it looks like the follicles are ready for EC on a weekend. Do people do EC or ET at weekends? How does the timimg work out? Also does anyone else have to go in for EC at 7am in the morning? I had no idea it would be so early. Could make child care very interesting!!

Hope you are ok KC11

Have a good weekend everyone

islegrin · 12/09/2009 20:37

Well ladies - we just got the call: 12 eggs fertilized! Now we wait and hope that 4 or more make it until Monday.

Just so you know, I feel like I'm turning into a loon! I'm worried about them, praying, wishing, hoping they'll grow and be alright!

DH and I discussed embryo donation yesterday, just in case we're lucky enough to have more than we need - we can potentially help out another couple. (Lots of hurdles yet before that happens, but we're talking about it.)

xx

duplomania · 12/09/2009 21:07

12 embrios, that's excellent islegrin!! that should give you fantastic chances, will you try and take them to blast? When will you get your next update?

Gingerwine, at my clinic they do all sorts of procedures at the weekend, even scans, so I would assume they do EC and ET at weekends. I have to be in hospital at 8am on Monday, sounds awfully early. wanted to have acupuncture before that but not sure now, would have to be pretty early.

londonlottie · 12/09/2009 21:36

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Bumpless · 13/09/2009 18:07

Hiya gals

Sooty , can't believe it, what a completely sh!tty thing to happen! You seem to be taking it amazingly well, I don't think I'd be as philosophical. Hope you gave that BDing everything... (((Sooty)))) Sometimes things really seem to conspire against you, don't they.

And another big hug for you (((( NPA ))) Really sorry that the BFN was confirmed. How was the party and SIL-gate? V tough timing for you, despite having had a couple of says to get used to it. I'm very impressed that you've decided to go for donor eggs. I'm still going rounc in circles on that one, although increasingly slowing down on the DE part of the circuit...

Gingerwine , brilliant that you got the job! And your timing seems to be brilliant, if you can do a cycle without worring about appointments and then have the job to look forward to. Congratulations!

Islegrin gasp! 12 embryos! That is amazing, you've done fantastically well. Everything crossed that they develop well. Hope you're managing not to stress too much, I know it's practically impossible...

LL I'm tickled pink about the thought of a father and daughter team delivering your babies! Talk about keeping it in the family, somehow I find that really nice! You may have a party-free NYE this year, but imagine the joint birthday party when they're 18...

Duplo Good luck for EC tomorrow! 3 follies sounds like a triumph to me, could be more than you need. Interesting to hear about GIFT being better for low responders, it wasn't ever mentioned to me, but possibly that was because DH's sperm stats meant we were recommended for ICSI. It might be rather hard to not know whether your eggs fertilised.

Issy hello, and congrats on your little baby girl!

Caitni LOL at the idea of mental rebooting! That's exactly what I'm trying to do!

Well, I saw the counsellor at LWC on Thursday. Talk about a waste of time. I'd been hoping for some help working through the tangle of conflicts I've got myself into over DE, and she just sat there shrugging and making trite comments like 'give it time' (I'm 41!!! Time ain't what I have!), with no attempt at helping me think things through. She obviously has a focus on whether DE children should be told they're donor-conceived, and spent ages on that, until eventually I butted in to tell her we had no issue with that or with donor anonymity and had always assumed we'd tell them from the start and support their right to contact their real mothers when they were 18, IF we went down that route... She also made some choice comments like calling the donor industry 'exploitation', saying it was her last day at the clinic and she was 'just playing at it' (glad you are, this is about the most important decision of my life...) and generally not acknowledging the fact that I was sitting there weeping like a fountain and obviously completely messed up. Hopeless. Not a completely wasted trip as DH did take me for a nice lunch in Covent Garden to compensate! It's had the bizarre effect of pushing me closer to choosing DE's, partly because it's demonstrated that no-one is going to give me the answer, I will just have to take a leap of faith.

But the ZW nutritionalist was brilliant, complete contrast, really knew her stuff and full of hopefull suggestions. Getting blood tests for Vitamin D and essential fatty acids done, so will wait to see what they say.

Sorry for me me me post, but it did feel nice to have a rant!

Bumpless · 13/09/2009 18:12

Oops! [sneaks out from under rock waving white flag emoticon] Just re-read this and seen massive freudian slip: called donor mother 'real mother'.Can see how upsetting that might be to anyone else considering donor eggs, v sorry, it's just where my head is now, I know most people are much more sorted out on this...

londonlottie · 13/09/2009 20:06

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