First time TTC?!! Let's get through this together - Calling all first time frolickers and fully proficient frolickers!

[summerbird]

A new thread to follow on from Part 3 - AKA the lucky thread!

Lets get some more BFP's this month

x

af caught me yesterday, so starting all over again. Good luck everyone

Thanks Ozzie and all the best to you for this coming month.

Supersized Penguins - Mmmmm heaven, I understand why they are your favourites now

It's tough I know, waiting to start TTC Curly, hope the months don't drag too much for you

Sorry to hear that sky, all the best to you for this coming month

thanks claire and sorry sky. happy wishes for some serious TTCing after AF has packed her bags

Well DH is has really irritated me. See my thread on relationships "mixed message irritation".

Jist of it is that he said last night the thought of having a baby is "like a big hand pushing him towards a cliff" - and then in the same conversation tells me he thinks it's fine and we should leave it up to fate.

I mean, FFS. It was his idea that I come off the pill. And he is the one having sex with me.

So is this just a scared man wobble do we think?

I feel so upset as I really thought we were on the same page - although he wasn't spinning with joy at ttc, we were at least talking and hoping (so I thought).

It has kind of taken the shine off what should be a really fun time and I am so annoyed at him, and yet can't show it because I don't want to be manipulative and to be fair, he is of course allowed to have perfectly valid feelings.

Thanks everyone.

I have order ovulation kits and basal thermometer. Any tips welcome as I've not done this before

Ozzie I had a quick read of your replies on the relationship thread, you have had a mixed bag of responses!

I can understand your irritation at DH. DH and I have had similar conversations - admittedly before we started TTC. One sentence that has stayed with me was when DH said "I'm worried that you won't have enough time for me when a baby arrives"!! At the time I thought: 'you selfish self-centered bastard' and still do from time to time. On reflection It is a very valid fear to have, we have a very close relationship, are each others best friends and TBH, anyone baby or adult coming into our world permanently could be conceived as a threat (pun not intended).

I have to say that I have been through the roller-coaster of do I want a baby or not and what will it do to our relationship, day to day life and future. I think this is very healthy, it shows that you have put a great deal of thought into bringing another life into the world and aren't taking the repercussions and responsibility lightly.

I obviously don't know your DH as well as you, but the fact he is talking about it with you is a good sign, I think he is getting his head round the idea of becoming a daddy.

It was bad timing on his part to bring this up when you'd just started your period and were out for this month, for that he deserves a virtual slap. I agree with some of the posters on the relationship thread (can't remember their names) that some men don't really get the TTC and PG thing and it's only when a baby is born that they feel the reality of the situation. This doesn't mean they won't make wonderful caring daddies and doesn't mean it's the way all men are, just for some it is how it is.

This TTC business is such an emotional time, I hope you are feeling ok today

It has been quiet on here!!!! I hope everyone is ok

So, CD31 for me (last months cycle was 29 days) and no sign of AF as yet. Did HPT this morning and BFN.

If AF doesn't make an appearance in the next few days I'll test again.

Just a bit of fun?!?!

Anyone heard of lunar natal calendars? Research suggests that you can trigger ovulation if you are relaxed and bd around the same phase of the moon as you were born. According to what I read this is esp. helpful if having fertility problems and is counted as an extra ovulation from the normal cycle one.

Had a look back and i'm one day past the full moon - this month it falls on the same day as the normal cycle.

I think you have to bd like you would when ttc a couple of days before and on the day.

Anyone up for trying this? Or have any more info on it?

Sounds interesting sky, hopefully I won't need to do anymore BD, well not for TTC anyway!!!!

Been quiet cause had guests for the weekend. Fingers and legs and all sorts crossed for you claire sky I've never heard of this before...

ozzie prob a bit late for this but it sounds like your OH is just having jitters. Hope you have had a chance to talk it through.

anyone had their rubella vaccination updated before TTC?

When I saw GP about our plans (coming off meds etc) he suggested I have blood test to check rubella status. I've now been recalled as a result, which makes me think i might need a new jab. But then I read you're not supposed to TTC till three months after the jab, to let the vaccination virus leave your body. Recall appointment not till August 12 - so if I get a vaccination then that will totally set back our TTC plans Not fair! But then, better than having a rubella baby. Any experiences out there?

x

curlycasper interesting I was planning to speak to nurse this week. Let me know how it goes.

Evening Curly, rubella was never mentioned by my GP when I discussed TTC and It never occurred to me to mention it. Am I right to think that the jab you have as a teenager (mine was done at secondary school) covers you throughout life? If not I don't know where that leaves me, well I do and it's not covered

Could you find out before the appointment if they are actually recalling you for the jab and if they are what impact will that have on your TTC plans?

Totally agree about rubella baby, always reminds me of 'The Mirror Cracked', an Agatha Christie adaptation starring Joan Collins. If you've seen it you'll know what I mean.

Hope you enjoyed your weekend with your guests. Hope Ozzie's ok, she hasn't posted since her DH irritated her

I'm trying to keep myself busy to take my mind of this - am I - aren't I scenario! But I keep ending up on here and maternity and pram sites

I need not wait any longer - AF's arrived!

So I'm now CD1, last cycle 30 days and the previous cycle 29 days, I wonder how long this next one will be?

I feel ok really, a little disappointed but it's still early days - relatively speaking

Hi everyone. claire I'm sorry to hear that AF arrived. It's so dissapointing when you feel like you have done all the right things to conceive.

Rubella - I had a blood test back in Feb when I was thinking of coming off the pill. They tested my immunity for chicken pox, rubella, mumps and measles. I was only immune to rubella despite having had chicken pox and mumps.

As I had some time, I had a chicken pox vaccine and MMR. They told me that it only should take 1 month for MMR to go out of the blood stream, but if I could leave it longer than that would be better.

And DH and I had a big chat over the weekend. I think it is just the jitters and a feeling and worry on his part that everything will change and we won't be able to do nice holidays and things with a baby.

Claire, we are similar to you. We're very close as a couple, especially after moving abroad away from our friends and family. We do lots together, and we are a bit of a career couple too (he's a banker, I'm a lawyer) and I think he imagines us becoming the boring couple who only do baby things, if you see what I mean.

Plus maternity provision is non existent out here so we will drop to one salary. I think he worries about me becoming baby obsessed rather than liking doing all the things we like doing now, like going out for dinner and having weekends away.

He has said though that leaving it to fate is fine, and he knows he will love the baby when it arrives.

It's not perfect, but I know he will be a great dad.

Hey Ozzie good to have you back. So pleased that you and DH have had a good chat. Lovely to read "but I know he will make a good dad" thats how I feel about my DH.

I do think these 'wobbles' are healthy, it shows a great deal of thought is being put into bringing baby into the world. And if he (DH) irritates you again, this is a good place to come and vent before sitting down and calmly discussing things with him

I can understand about the lack of maternity provision, being self employed leaves us in a different position to others who are employed with regard to maternity pay/rights. One of the reasons we've waited until now to start TTC is to build up another side of the business (one that doesn't require as much input from me) so that DH can fly solo for a while.

After speaking to a couple that we know who are also self-employed, I believe there is a small government maternity benefit which we could claim, but I think it depends on how your business is set up. We haven't looked into it yet.

Well, AF is well and truly here, another heavy, painful one for me. I don't remember periods being like this before I was on the pill!

Hi everyone,

Can I join this thread? I'm new, just jumped on the May bus, but thought I'd say hi here as well if that is allowed? Still trying to learn the MN etiquette...

I joined MN mainly because the past two weeks I've been going CRAZY! We've only just started to TTC and I'm realistically expecting it to be a while (statistically, right?), thought I'd be very relaxed about the whole thing and 'see what happens' but I've been unable to think about anything else!

For those of you a bit further down the line, how do you keep sane and get any work done?

Oh well, back to googling 'ovulation symptoms' and such

Hello and welcome ImmaterialGirl I've just joined the May bus too, this thread has got some lovely girls on it and I will continue to post here, but it can get a little quiet at times!

I'm just starting my 3rd month of TTC (AF got me yesterday), I'm still keeping optimistic and like you expecting it to take a little while.

I find the first two weeks of the month I'm very relaxed, then the second two (around ovulation and pre AF) I'm a crazy woman googling everything baby related, so you sound pretty 'normal' to me

claireinthecommunity thank you!

Sorry to hear about your visit from AF
Have a nice guilt-free glass of wine tonight!

And I'm glad I'm not the only crazy one -I'm still fairly early in my cycle (day 9) but have no idea about when things happen for me, so fretting a bit. Might try temping and opk sticks months (unless something miraculous happens...) I'm sure when I get more used to things after a while I'll calm down a bit.

I'm glad there are others here to talk to though!

Hi all and welcome immaterial

Sorry to hear of AF's appearance Claire. First one off pill was horrendously painful for me - but lasted less time than usual, so hope you get rid soon.

Officially completely bambboozled by my temps and CM signs. no consistency whatsoever. Still, I'll keep watching to see what happens.

Better news on rubella front is that most places only say to wait one month, not three. But I'd still recommend checking where you all stand. From my tinterweb research it does look like we're not necessarily covered for life after the school jab...

x

Claire Sorry afs got you

Started opks today and the grapefruit is definately working Should ovulate friday fingers crossed

Hi all, thanks for the commiserations on my AF, I'm currently having a large glass of Merlot and a piece of raspberry cheesecake to make me feel better, it's working

Curly next time I see my doctor (I will need to get a prescription for unrelated reason to TTC) I will ask about rubella. It's good that you'll only need to wait around one month rather than three for it to be out of your system.

sky I will be interested to see how you get on with the OPKs, it's an avenue I haven't been down yet

mmm claire merlot and cheescake - the best cure!

I've just started a thread on rubella cause I couldn't find much info on here with relation to pre-conception (all MMR in kids) it's here if anyone wants to contribute. Has a link to NHS info

sky yes, please share re the OPKs could be useful when my temps etc are so wonky! you might become an OPK guru for the rest of us!

ozzie happy to hear about the chat

Thanks Curly and Claire Will keep you all updated, this is my first time using OPKs. I got a pack of 20 for 4 quid from the same shop on amazon as I get the cheap HPTs (these are about 3 quid for 20 and they have worked OK) So fingers crossed. It will put my mind at ease knowing for sure that I've ovulated.