Mid Thirties First time TCC

[donttrythisathome]

Anyone feel like joining this bus??

I'm 36, TCC 1, never wanted children and now have done a complete u-turn!

TCC 1, Cycle 2, UCL 28-33ish, CD12

Thanks all. And at least I can stop prodding my boobs ("hurt dammit!") for a few weeks now

SarahAbroad I am CL27/28 (when my body is not playing silly buggers) and I'm not planning to test until at least day 31 (if and when it become relevant!). No point wasting money on HPT's unnecessarily if AF can give me the bad news for free...Although I'd probably waste a lot of money waiting 100 days Cosmosis

You should read the thread on early testing this - although it puts ideas in your head (exactly the opposite effect to what is intended)

Skihorse My ski instructor last year was Argentinian. I hear it is great around August time there...

Donttry agreed - I'll share my body but August is mine!!!! Although perhaps if I gave birth in August my DH would remember my birthday in future

donttry I'm getting on ok actually, bought the boots kit with the thermometer and book and just keep it next to the bed and do it first thing when my alarm goes off. I started on about day 15 of this cycle (now on CD29) but I think I'm still messed up from the pill as my temps are just steady and don't seem high enough for me to have ov'd just before I started temping, so am concluding I haven't actually ov'd at all. If it carries on like this I'll definitely be using that referral I'm getting to the specialist!

Oh, I don't know Cosmo. I started mid-cycle too a couple of months ago and my temps were lower than I expected, but apparently some people just have lower temps!

GP ruled out hypothyroidism or hormone probs.

Mine are a bit erratic, so am going to try a new thermometer.

do you think I should test to rule it out then???

(had blood tests before and no hormone issues appeard other than that high FSH).

Oh, no no no!!

Wait to see if there's a change in the temps in the first part of your next cycle (if no BFP!). Even then the medics take temping with a pinch of salt I believe, as is unreliable.

With me, I'm a degree lower than what is supposedly the "norm" but it's common.

I started a thread about it here

Oh, and the GP didn't suggest the tests, I just span them a line and persuaded them to do it for me.

I am a paranoid android though - do not join me in bonkersville.

I'm going mad. Last night I dreamed two of you emailed me to say you were pregnant. I feel very low this morning - like it's never, ever going to happen with me (now 7th cycle trying) and I'm starting to get snippy about what OH eats. Like I didn't spent my 20s with a cocktail in one hand and a fag in the other...

Going to see the fertility clinic on Tuesday and I don't know... just not feeling confident about it all at all and feeling that this would be "Just typical" you know... it took me a long time to get to this state of mind where pregnancy wouldn't be tantamount to child cruelty and I just have this horrible feeling that I'll miscarry or it'll just never happen.

Hi Skihorse Just on train on way to London so will lose internet and power at any time.

But wanted to say sorry you've woken up so low. I think there is a lot of negative media and comments about women in the press and it is hard as a 30+ yr old woman not to always feel guilty and negative about some aspect of family life. And I feel under a lot of pressure to get pg quickly and for it to be easy which it was for all of my friends.

Hope it's just morning blues for you. Fingers crossed for Tuesday - try to think of the positive stuff, I know it's a bit of a grab at a silver lining but at least you have a Dr who after 7 months has you going to a fertility clinic (and an actualy appointment to boot!) Some are much more cr*p/less sympathetic than that. Have a lovely bank hol and think of Tuesday as the start of something new.

xx

Well my temp had gone up a lot this morning, but I'm not sure how much effect my large wine intake last night (was out for a meal) might have had on temps, so will see what tomorrows temp is.

skihorse sorry you are feeling low. FWIW I often think that for some reason it will not happen for us, I think that is probably very common.

skihorse, sorry you are feeling so down in the dumps but am glad you have a doctor who is so postive/helpful. I wish there were a way we could all make ourselves think positivelymy two most recent pg friends both swear that they got pregnant the months that they were too busy to think about it/worry about it, but the idea of just "forgetting" about it is impossible. (Sorrynot trying to be a downer here, just sympathising.) Aussieng is completely right that the media, etc all makes it a lot worse.

Cosmosis, good luck with those temps...

skihorse I'm so sorry you feel sad - I know how you feel. We're over 12 months trying now, and I have more or less got to the point where secretly I assume it'll never happen. I keep reading that 90% of women get pregnant within a year, and that 12 months is pretty standard, which is why I got so excited about late periods for the last few months (13 & 14). Alas, not.

But, unlike the sloth-like PandaFigs, you are super fit, and have loads of sex with a prime young specimen of a man - it's just a matter of time. And if there are any problems (I know is v irritating when people say, 'Is just a matter of time', as if you're an impatient toddler, and part of you wants to screech, 'But I might have TWO WOMBS, all right?') you're into the system now, to get any problems diagnosed and fixed. Do they call it a Fertility Clinic in the Netherlands, btw? That would be a good positive attitude - unlike the letter I've got from St George's, telling me to report to the INFERTILITY UNIT in some hospital in bloody Epsom.

aussieng Could not agree more about the media and their tormenting attitude to 30+ motherhood. It's vile and pernicious.

cosmosis it's hard to work out whether your temps are higher until you've seen what they are in the first part of the month - I think everyone is different, and the increase isn't actually very much. Have you tried registering with Fertility Friend online? I had the Boots book too, but it's fiddly, whereas on Fertility Friend you just enter the reading and it works the chart out for you.

I get where you're coming from ski. Its completely natural i think. Its probably the one area in our lives at this stage where we have NO control.

Very frustrating.

How tempting is it just to go for bleedin' IVF just to avoid the uncertainties and waiting every month?!

Bonkers idea I know.

donttry just a quickie as I need to walk the dogs before bodypump. A friend of mine is having trouble TTC - she has quite a bit of money behind her and so went down the IVF route privately... although they managed to get 4 viable embryos (I hope I'm using the correct terminology), and got one implanted - it still didn't "take".

I wonder if it's possible to get some sort of transplant of a 28 week feotus?

Temp back down again this morning, so yesterdays high must have been wine related

wildfig good thinking, I may well register with them.

The problem with me Cosmo is the winedrinking is most nights, so thats probably why the temps are all over the place!

Yeah ski I know the IVF doesn't always work either - ARGHHHHH!!!!!!

I took a day off hooray and its sunny and I live by the sea so I'm going to make the most of it.

Hopefully not quite as much as I had though!

Have a lovely sunny day off

Well, since we're sharing, 2 days ago I had some spotting and thought it was day 1 of AF, so I went out that night with an old friend from university who was in town for one night and we got properly* drunk.

However by today I still haven't come on properly (just spotting) so now I'm wondering if there;s a possibility and if I've caused some foetal alcohol syndrome and am going to have baby with close set eyes and a monobrow.....

• Civilised glass of wine in garden, followed by pub session, then came home and watched my wedding video (she was abroad so missed our wedding), then dancing round the living room to the songs of our youth.

Oh well, it's the bank holiday and SkaterBoy and I are getting out of London this afternoon and staying in a cottage with a four poster bed

What's everyone doing on their Mondays off?

no no no, doesn't start taking from the bloodstream till after 6wks ish iirc so no monobrow worries needed

We're cycling on Monday with some friends. your trop sounds lovely SkaterGrrrl.

Hope everyone has good BH Weekends.

Erm. Hello.

(nervously clears throat...)
I am 37
I have a rescue cat.
I have a new build house.
I have been TTC for about a year.
I have spent the day planning Bellini cocktails for my child-free friends who are coming round tonight.

Can I join your gang?

Mrs Perkins

hello MrsPerkins Bellinis eh? Pull up a chair!

No BH Monday for me, for us Thursday was BH and I took the friday off so I've had a long weekend and so far we've done fuck all except shop and we're the world's worst shoppers. This is what happens when it's been 6 months since we went shopping. sigh I kept deliberately NOT going clothes shopping thinking that I'd get preggers and balloon... now that I've invested in some clothes it'll all happen of course! ;)

Mrsperkins I'm more interested in the sound of the new build than the bellinis! Tell all! Old age and too much diy on a broken down victorian cottage must be getting to me!

Skater sounds like a fab night with your friend. I really miss my friends back home. I've no friends where I live, although I have some where I work (London).

Ski what happened to the kayaking/jetskiing/climbing Everest (ok exaggerating now!)?.

Think I've started to spot so AF not far

So can get pissed at a Brazilian night I might be going to

donttrythisathome Well the kayaking on thursday totally didn't happen and we spent all day at home erm... well.

Friday we went to the body pump class which was brilliant but now my arse hurts.

Today we went to the kayak place but there was no sign of kayaks just OH saying "I told you you should've phoned in advance" - believe me he nearly got a punch for that one!

It's all gone a bit lazy though... meh.

Enjoy Brazilian night - I'm really "friendless" here too. Despite having worked at the same place for knocking on 9 years one of my colleagues told me back right at the beginning "I already have my friends, we've known each other since we were babies - I don't need any more friends"... So I kind of hang out with the girls at the stables but I miss my real friends.

TBH I like the sound of a run down Victorian country cottage far more than a 'luxury town house' on the edge of a rather depressing ex mining town, but hey, credit crunch builders'slump + laziness = new build!

Do you want my story?
-Met DP last year.
-He 37 with 7 yr old from 1st marriage.
-never ever felt remotely broody and never had any success in the romantic department..til now when my ovaries have, it would seem, hit the scrapheap.
-We have been TTC more or less for about 10 months. This is my first month temping.
-Currently on CD 34 but BFN this morning. Cycles can range from 26-34 days.
-I've had all the blood tests done. Everything normal. Got appt at fertility clinic booked for 26th June.

Still niente.

Not too bitter and twisted yet. Just fed up of mental menses and (sorry if un-pc) having to focus most of my energies into dealing with the maladjusted offspring of people who, well, should never be allowed to pro-create.

Mrs P

Hi Mrs P - welcome

Bellinis with your child-free friends? Hell - can I join your gang????

Does your DSC live with you? I do think children from previous relationships add pressure to TTC. I am very aware that DH fathered a child previously (long story)

Sorry Donttry - maybe it is just implantation (fingers crossed). I hate spotting - it is like your body taunting you

That's 3 now with up-coming appts for the fertility clininc right? Or am I losing track? It will be good to hear all your experiences.

Best thing that ever happened to me, friends wise was my "starter marriage" (wasn't actually quite so flippant at the time but you can only try to make the best of a huge mistake for so long) ending. Suddenly lots of acquaintances rallied round and became friends and I thank god for them because I was quite a long way from home. But it does get harder again once you are "coupled up". Possibly I make a bit less effort but there is also the aspect of them knowing that I am "alright" too so a bit less effort is made.

My bank holiday mostly will consist of cleaning up chicken poo from the patio (very good for the composter!) to try and enjoy the garden in the good weather poo free... oh and G&T's since I am currently still out for the count